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Ashkrik23's foundry mission reviews.

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  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Oh, I forgot to write this in my initial review!

    Double check all of the OOC yellow text and the dialogue responses for players. Many of them do not begin with capital letters like they should.
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • helixfungushelixfungus Member Posts: 172 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Yep, made the patch on that too...
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Awesome.

    10chars.
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Unsung: Inferno by @Starfarertheta

    Opening Dialogue

    Always well written and informative as always.


    The Unsung Battlefield


    The captain you meet up with does not say her name. She only says captain.



    Badlands

    Nothing major to note.


    Conduit Station

    Nothing major to note.


    Conduit


    An Epic battle.


    Aftermath



    Nothing major to note.


    You may have noticed the lack of much commentary here, mainly because there are almost no errors.

    Star has crafted another masterpiece here. There is so much optional content and the amount of possible paths one can take requires MANY playthroughs, providing a unique experience every time. He has proven himself a mastery of detail.

    If you love the open-ended style missions with lots of bonus content, this is a perfect candidate, as are his other missions.

    Easy 5/5,
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • helixfungushelixfungus Member Posts: 172 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Even as good as Starfarer is, he is rather discouraged by the few plays on his missions... (check on his forum) it requires a lot of social contact, as well as quality in the mission, to fly high in the ranking.. I do not have the recipe (for being played plentyful...) - - - I know only that some of my older missions get more plays, but I do not know why or where the STO players pick those titles of mine... almost certainly not from the foundry browser of missions...

    Starfarer... if you read this message, I will try to pick some of yours too... I played one of yours once, and it was not bad at all. Please do not be discouraged. Beside, We Have Still the Catlover... ask Ashy how to advertise at best your missions before giving up on them...
  • starfarerthetastarfarertheta Member Posts: 740 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    ashkrik23 wrote: »
    Unsung: Inferno by @Starfarertheta


    ...


    The Unsung Battlefield


    The captain you meet up with does not say her name. She only says captain.

    ...

    Thanks for the review Ashkrik! I’ll see if I can come up with a name for that captain.


    ...

    Starfarer... if you read this message, I will try to pick some of yours too... I played one of yours once, and it was not bad at all. Please do not be discouraged. Beside, We Have Still the Catlover... ask Ashy how to advertise at best your missions before giving up on them...

    While the low number of plays have discouraged me from continuing to run my own thread, the other reason is my next major project (due 2015), which is slightly more ambitious than my last one. To give you some idea of what I'm working on, here is the mission structure I have decided to use:

    Mission Start

    Act 1
    Map 1
    Map 2
    Map 3
    Map 4
    Cryptic Social Map (Break point)


    Act 2
    Map 5
    Map 6
    Map 7
    Map 8
    Cryptic Social Map (Break point)


    Act 3
    Map 9
    Map 10
    Map 11
    Map 12
    Mission End


    And there will be three of these things.:D The idea is that each map will act as a chapter and each act will be akin to a mini-mission.
    I’m aiming for each act to take somewhere around 30 minutes to complete, each mission thus taking 90 minutes to complete.
    So I’d rather spend the time I have playing STO (at least the remainder of 2014) building and polishing this project rather than spending it trying to draw some attention to my previous projects (I understand that advertising campaigns have to be somewhat monumental to get any noticable traction). This is in addition to the “On a New Year’s Eve” project I’m working on as well. And there is also the surprise review thread I'm running.

    Thanks for your concern though!
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Even as good as Starfarer is, he is rather discouraged by the few plays on his missions... (check on his forum) it requires a lot of social contact, as well as quality in the mission, to fly high in the ranking.. I do not have the recipe (for being played plentyful...) - - - I know only that some of my older missions get more plays, but I do not know why or where the STO players pick those titles of mine... almost certainly not from the foundry browser of missions...

    Starfarer... if you read this message, I will try to pick some of yours too... I played one of yours once, and it was not bad at all. Please do not be discouraged. Beside, We Have Still the Catlover... ask Ashy how to advertise at best your missions before giving up on them...

    Well, my oldest mission has just gotten above the 310 play mark. I guess that's okay/good for an almost year old mission that isn't a spotlight? There are people who do a lot more than me but don't get as many plays for some reason.


    I have yet to start making trailers. All I do is advertise on this forum, Starbaseugc, and my fleet forum. A lot of plays could come from word of mouth as several podcasts have done reviews on my missions or recorded them. I also seek to talk to every player I possibly can. I'll send them a friend invite when they finish a mission to ask about their experience and share feedback. I feel this helps a lot and establishes a connection between author and player. I've had a few mention before that this was the first time they've ever seen an author actually contact them like that.

    Getting that connection could potentially earn more plays as people are more willing to recommend the missions to other players I feel.



    But yes, I have noticed the terrible circumstance of such high quality missions like Star's or Logitech's being under-played despite some doing more advertisement than me.
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Cold Remembrance by @nikkojt

    I had to read a previous review to find the starting location. Make sure to always put the starting location in every bit of introduction dialogue you can.


    screenshot_2014-07-07-10-53-28_zpsd1937a31.jpg

    Docking Ring

    Nothing major to note.


    Romulus


    I like this map, well made.

    The station has its default foundry name listing. Suggest changing it.

    Romulan Station

    Optional dialogue is good.


    Tal Shiar Attack


    Nothing major to note.

    This is a short and simple mission. I do agree with others that it would have been nice if there had been more to it. But what there is, works. Just a few minor issues. The mission is well written and very clean.

    I gave 5/5 simply for it's polished feel.

    Good job, keep it up!
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • nikkojtnikkojt Member Posts: 372 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Thanks for the review!
    ashkrik23 wrote: »
    Cold Remembrance by @nikkojt

    I had to read a previous review to find the starting location. Make sure to always put the starting location in every bit of introduction dialogue you can.
    nikkojt wrote: »
    Things to note:
    I am aware that the entrance is a little hard to find, but I can't change this until voting finishes. It's located near the weapons vendor on the Promenade.

    Romulus


    The station has its default foundry name listing. Suggest changing it.
    Noted, will fix post-voting.
    This is a short and simple mission. I do agree with others that it would have been nice if there had been more to it. But what there is, works. Just a few minor issues. The mission is well written and very clean.

    I gave 5/5 simply for it's polished feel.

    Good job, keep it up!
    There was originally going to be more of it, but I ran out of time on the contest and had to curb my ambition. Glad it didn't come out too rushed.
    I am NikkoJT, Foundry author and terrible player. Follow me!
    There used to be a picture here, but they changed signatures and I can't be bothered to replace it.
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Ignore my statements, I am stupid, I forgot you told me where to go.
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • helixfungushelixfungus Member Posts: 172 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Star... is good to see your spirit is high... after all we both like stay in the Foundry because is so fun create within it... I haven't thought to do multiparters so far, cause I think with one (maybe two...) mission you can tell the core of your trek story...
    I can't tell you or ashy to contain your desire to "segmentize" your story so there is "more"... however I deeply and sincerely prey you to try to do chunks missions no longer that 35 to 50 min... people like me that can't be many hours online, because they work, will appreciate that a lot...

    That's my grain of sand...
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Star... is good to see your spirit is high... after all we both like stay in the Foundry because is so fun create within it... I haven't thought to do multiparters so far, cause I think with one (maybe two...) mission you can tell the core of your trek story...
    I can't tell you or ashy to contain your desire to "segmentize" your story so there is "more"... however I deeply and sincerely prey you to try to do chunks missions no longer that 35 to 50 min... people like me that can't be many hours online, because they work, will appreciate that a lot...

    That's my grain of sand...

    My missions typically run that long on average.
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    "Extraction" replay by @nak3dsnke


    screenshot_2014-07-07-13-46-08_zps89d9df83.jpg

    Deep Space

    Clean and well written dialogue with choices.


    Excellent Trigger work


    Byzantine

    Nothing major to note.


    Bridge

    Nothing major to note.


    Instillation


    Nothing major to note.

    This is a replay of one of the first missions I ever reviewed. It is simple as it was one of Snake's first missions I believe. It has been so long since I tested it I cannot really remember my initial review. Despite the simplicity, this is a well written and clean piece. It is good to see the amount of plays it has gotten.

    5/5
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • photisphotis Member Posts: 1 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Hi there Ashkrik, it's Sinderion.

    I have read bios of your characters and can't shake a feeling that Mister Scar is going to appear in the fifth episode of Scars series XD
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    photis wrote: »
    Hi there Ashkrik, it's Sinderion.

    I have read bios of your characters and can't shake a feeling that Mister Scar is going to appear in the fifth episode of Scars series XD

    I have no idea what yer talking about.

    *Looks around nervously*
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • lordarathronlordarathron Member Posts: 249 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    "The Devil and All His Angels" is now available for reviews! Would you like to review?
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    "The Devil and All His Angels" is now available for reviews! Would you like to review?

    What a rhetorical question!
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    List updated.
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    List updated.
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Review times are undetermined right now.
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • midnighttlcmidnighttlc Member Posts: 107 Arc User
    edited August 2014
    Guess what's up!

    @midnighttlc AKA STO Admiral Aaron

    VARIANCE

    The follow up to ADRIFT
    Federation
    Level 41+

    Classified: By order of Starfleet Command:

    Your mission is to save the timeline from a power-crazed madman. Admiral Aaron and the crew of the Northstar are counting on the success of this mission. You will need to go back in time and retrieve Mirror Admiral Aaron. Prepare for a battle to the bitter end of time.

    Mission Objective: Locate and recover Mirror Universe Aaron and prevent any damage to the timeline.

    Starfleet Command out.

    VA1LIVE_zps1128e5fc.jpg
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited August 2014
    Adding. Don't know when I'll start reviews back.
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited September 2014
    List updated, reviews will return soon.
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited September 2014
    Updated.
    10chars
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • elijahthomasstoelijahthomassto Member Posts: 53 Arc User
    edited October 2014
    Hey Ashkrik, I recently created a forum post for my mission "Raptor's Reflection", which you reviewed a while back.

    I wanted to clear with you whether you mind my quoting and linking to your review in that post.
    Foundry Missions by @ElijahThomas

    e3e7b26f-fe46-407a-9b30-9b78e5b43584_zps7b329b80.jpg
  • lordarathronlordarathron Member Posts: 249 Arc User
    edited October 2014
    Attumar: First Contact by lordarathron when you feel the want. Any level, FED mission.
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited October 2014
    Adding and quoting.
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • elijahthomasstoelijahthomassto Member Posts: 53 Arc User
    edited October 2014
    Thank you, very much, Ashkrik. I've updated my post.
    Foundry Missions by @ElijahThomas

    e3e7b26f-fe46-407a-9b30-9b78e5b43584_zps7b329b80.jpg
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited November 2014
    I want to try and get back to one review every couple of days at least soon. If you want an in-depth spell-check review, let me know in the initial post.
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
  • ashkrik23ashkrik23 Member Posts: 10,809 Arc User
    edited November 2014
    The Devil and All his Angels by @ @lordarathron
    Mission location:

    Be slightly more descriptive, like which side the conference room is on. Your location is one of those lesser-used spots and you can never put too much detail with the player base we deal with.


    D'Varis Ground


    May want to put an overall recap of the previous mission in the series for those like me who have not played in a while. Always a good idea.
    Dialogue is clean and well-made.
    Map is simple, nothing major to note in terms of errors.

    Caves


    Should change the "interact' text to something more in-character on the first pipe.
    Same thing with the rock formation in the second to last room.
    Likewise with the force field in the final room.
    Nothing else major to note. Simple map. I forgot how Shadowkind are creepy here.

    NPF Headquarters

    A very well made map. I bet those shuttles took a while to line up.
    You might want to do some more patrols to the beginning area to make it feel more alive. The majority of patrols seem to be in one corner. You can use the single neutral npc enemy to patrol with.
    You can perform "emotes" by using the ooc chat option for like when the Gorn raises his glass to you during the morale boost meeting. I think it will look better than the parentheses.

    Lab
    Nothing to note.

    Headquarters under attack

    Why you kill B'Ven!? *Anger*

    NPF Homeworld

    Optionals provide extra content.

    Sol Space
    Nothing to note.

    ESD

    You have a cat, you win the internet.
    I like the lighting. (Not the bugged shadows..but the real darker overall lighting*
    Change the interact text on this map for objects.
    You killed a cat. No more internet for you.

    Earth Under Siege

    Fix interact text.
    Clever mechanics.

    Plot twist.

    Well done. You have come a long way. 5 stars!
    King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride. arcgames.com/en/forums#/discussion/1138650/ashkrik23s-foundry-missions
    ashkrik_by_lindale_ff-d65zc3i.png
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