[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Please leave comments or suggestions on the main thread for Homage to Galris at the following link.
Also feel free to check out some of my other projects at the following link.
Well, since the new season is up, I can't give ratings in-game an there may potentially be bugs that showed up which aren't the author's fault. Do you want me to still review while the missions are being republished, or wait till the editor comes back online?
Agreed. Especially those missions which start from somewhere like the console outside the old transporter room.
I think it'd be a better playing experience for everyone to wait cause then the authors can make sure everything is working correctly, and the players get the best possible gameplay experience.
Wave Empire, part 1, by skyline45 Mission description
Capital is spelled "capitol" in the description.
Atlantis
The interact with the warp gate object says "invisible object."You should change that to something else.
Good use of triggers to make things appear and disappear. I suggest making the nav beacon at waiting for docking procedures bigger.
Capital is spelled "capitol."
Docking Station
Multiple dialogue options are always good, especially when they providing background information on the new characters.
Maybe you should use just a few more npcs to fill the rest of the area out. Examples being the meeting room on the opposite end from where the player spawns.
Loerina
A very nice city. Excellent job on the custom work.
I probably should have explored more before moving on hehe.
Ascended Council
The Ascended are floating in the air above their chairs in the meeting room. I am not sure if the way the chairs are shaped prevented them from being seated right. Take a look at fixing this if possible. If the chairs do not allow it then disregard this.
[3:12] [NPC] Ascended Loriyen: We are aware of your accomplishments Vice Admiral, and have full confidence in your ability to find out what has happened to Ascended Uioda. The last place we where aware of his consciousness was in his living quarters.
Were is spelled as 'where."
Living Quarters
Nothing major to note here.
Ascended Council
2 phantasms provide an interesting battle.
Nothing major to note.
Loerina, take 2
I like the "war' going on. Being able to skip combat is good.
Atlantis
Beaming over the body has an object named "object 1"
Should rename that.
This was an excellent introduction to a series and mission overall. The maps were clean and well-used. Some were simple, others were more detailed, all did what they were meant to accomplish. Dialogue was very well written and excellent y clean. I recommend users bring rep traits or gear for damage resistance to Psi damage as you will strictly fight Psi damage enemies.
Excellent job! 5/5.
Undisclosed location
The ships are named things like "Federation Escort 5." I recommend renaming each ship to have its own unique name. That adds a major level of detail.
This map could be reworked into dialogue on the next map or in the grant mission dialogue. Only one task does not provide much when the dialogue is small enough to fit somewhere else. If you remove this map, it would reduce the load times for your players. It is up to you though.
Eclipse Interior
One group of NPCs I assumed were made to patrol are standing in the first hallway staring at the wall.
Multiple dialogue options are always good.
Undisclosed location
Nothing major to note.
Reliokah
Nice map visuals right off the bat.
Surface
Excellent wreckage, well placed.
Research facility
You could add optional dialogues with some of the prisoners as extra content.
Nice plot twist.
Reliokah space once more
Nothing major to note.
Fallback
I recommend giving each ship here an unique name.
This mission could have dialogue put somewhere else in order to avoid using a whole map just for one purpose.
Eclipse bridge
The officers are floating in their chairs. Recommend seeing if you could fix that.
Once again, another great mission. 5/5. I have one thing to note. I noticed you have people reach an area when doing a map transfer sometimes. These instances do not have an objective marker. I suggest making sure the player is always programmed to leave from the "whole map" instead of relying on this. Some people may not realize they need to go to a door and think the mission is bugged.
"Object" should be renamed to something like "Docking bay" etc.
Station
NPCs are floating in their chairs.
A group of npcs I assume to be a patrol is stuck facing a wall on top of some benches.
2:45] [NPC] Captain Yuina Skyline: (Blushes) Well here are the passes you and your crew will need to get onto the shuttle. (You recieve Waveloid shuttle passes) The shuttle number is F292.
When it gets here the shuttle will be docked in loading bay C. You can get there by using the south eastern door of this hub. Once aboard feel free to come by the bridge. I will be helping coordinate routine brigde operations.
Bridge has a typo in it.
Shuttle 292
Nothing major to note.
Prison
The courtroom is a nice creation.
Achilles system
This system has a nice and clean asteroid field you put together.
"Object" should be renamed to something to match the story.
Unknown LOcation
Nice map work with the nebula.
Breen ship
Nothing major to note.
Eclipse Bridge
A nice bridge.
Once again, nothing major to note besides a few minor issues. I still recommend having characters leave from the whole map and not using a specific object. There isn't a waypoint marker on some of them so it makes it harder for players to find it.
First map
I recommend increasing the radius on the reach marker.
Animus System
Nothing major to note.
Celebration Map
Nothing major to note.
Deep space
Some great effects here.
Object is named "Invisible object" for space walk.
The villain's ally ships have numbers in their names and should be renamed.
The same is true for the battle versions.
Every interact object on this map is named "Invisible object"
Cruiser
Nothing major to note.
Bridge
Nice effects here.
Base of Operations
Nothing major to note.
Bridge level
Nothing major to note.
Bridge level
A good ending to a series.
4/5. This mission had some minor issues that have been throughout the series. I felt these hit the immersion negatively sometimes. Great job!
Overall Series Thoughts
This was a very good series but did have some minor issues present throughout the entire thing. The 2 issues were objects maintaining default names and and not being able to transfer from a whole map. Some map transitions could be hard to find due to a lack of way point markers. I suggest changing every map transition to leave from the whole map if possible.
Besides those needed changes, you have done well. I hope you continue to have future success!
Whelp, I lost all of my review notes while playing the mission, but I can list the main things here.
Your biggest strength was your superb map-making skills. You are very good with the tool. I was not sure however, if this was intended to be a serious or comedic mission if not both. This is mainly due in part to dialogue like "OMG" in the middle of it. I also found many typos throughout the story. I suggest going back or having a friend take notes on them for you in a review. In addition, some npcs had default foundry names, I suggest fixing those.
Thanks for your review, ashy. I do know that I need to polish my dialogues, as english is not my mother toungue... I like to see my foundry as WIPS, so yes - I know I have to check 'n double check for typos.. A pity you lost your detailed review, that could have helped fix those little ragged edges... For the comic style in it.. I dunno... I did my best to put some yes, more than in other missions, but I was worried I could overdo, or not convey the humour in a language that I do not master 100 percent, so in the end I did restrain myself a lot on that .expect one thorough revvie on your last mission in return... thanx again pal !
Sorry Ashy, I think there is some problem with the second space map, I can't activate the reach marker for beam out to the planet... so I can't proceed with the review. I keep hover again and again on the green circle and nothing happens... tomorrow I will try again with another starship of mine... anyway I think its safer for you to enlarge the radius of the reach marker there...up to you though
Eventually I managed to catch the right height to touch the marker and go on.. I am playing pt 3 onward now. Your missions are very long, usually I am compeled to break in 2 or more game sessions to end them, consider that I haven't more than an hour a day to play anything cause I have to go to work.
For that catch with reach marker problem, as I said you could simply enlarge the radius of it.. a lot... or you can substitute it with an invisible object. I advice for it because you can eventually get a direction to current objective (the inv obj in this case) pressing the V button. But I think the first move will suffice...
And so it begins...
USS Simba first interior map
Your strolling officers have become almost your signature...
I see some fine customisation on the level, and very cured background dialogues too.
Get past energy... space map
Good customizing here ! I like the fieryness of it...
I liked it a lot... the only downtime was the security question regarding the lions, it was all too easy and a bit out of place.
Some problems getting the hook to markers here... Ha, remans... like the tomatoes... or the wednesdays!
Strong enemies... had fun destroying them. Some lagging issue... I have noted the same on some of my own, and I suspect the
culprits are that nice asteroids with square buildings/pumps on... use that gadgets with parsimony.
find the ferasan map... WHAT... I cannot see a damned thing... you should rename this place Arrakis... with a grin I read on the
mission objectives "observe your surroundings..." yeah, try it...
Hey... do not misunderstand me, I like this setup a lot.
Undines... this means I will die a lot of times.
And the Breen thereafter... I like this ground combats more than usual... and I am not a big fan of ground c., remember ?
I would like put some more hints on how Remans got an alliance with these Ferasans in dialogs, or what do they gain with each other alliance.
However, action is good, and is sustained rather well by dialogs. I still waiting for your proverbial ground massacre that will took blood 'n sweat 'n at least an hour to clear...
A keycard to open an underground entrance ? What, like a motel of some sort... ?
About the funny things on missions... I liked the klingons doing exercise in their spare time waiting for action...
bring the ferasans to justice map
I found very unlikely to have such a troubled an windy atmosphere in a closed interior - you clearly used an exterior weather effect, and here unfits bigtime... you should try to that kind of fog that rest at ground level maybe.
Lots of Ferasan to toast, but they are rather easily disposable, plus there is a good variety on things to take cover behind.
Realized Commander Boulevard and his attack group are Gorn in disguise... when the commander began to throw large rocks at me...
Here it is... the boss fight with the Reman dog...
Though one indeed...
A cardassian elevator cabin... this time makes sense here.
ferasan research toxin level
hmm... talk to the deceased elachi button to be rewritten somehow... and so the "talk to.."'s on all the other deceased ones in
the room.
However I found very interesting the talk to the Undine kept prisoner...
stop the ferasan ambush map:
Again problems with hook to reach marker prior to space combat... spent almost 30 min to get past...I was about to abort the entire mission...
BTW F.S.F. stands for...?
I like your idea of "controlled" spaceships other factions... I could lend the idea... not to mention I could produce a Caitian vs Ferasan mission of my own
4 stars, the missing one only because of annoyances into getting hook in space reach markers.
Very well done.
PS- I choose to not reload the mission with the enlarged reach markers to not restart over from the top... I am sure that the problem was solved... that's for the next ones who will play, and enjoy it
Sorry for the delay on reviews. I am attempting to wrap up production of my latest mission so it is out of the way. When it is finished, I am entering a break time where I'll be focusing more on playing stuff in-game, including the foundry missions.
I suggest putting the starting location in the "engage the enemy" line. You want that info everywhere you can get it because many people do not read.
8:52] [NPC] Rational: We wont listen to your Federation lies any longer. All Fighter wings ATTACK.
wont should be won't.
Stargazer's Last Known Location
References were amusing.
The objective "Engageing the enemies" should be "Engaging the enemies."
I can see this mission is meant to not be taken fully seriously. In that case, the puns are funny.
Unique ship names are good.
In, "Go to the Chimera," I suggest increasing the reach marker radius.
U.S.S. Chimera interior
Nice custom costumes on the NPCs.
Good map design off the start.
You can put an invisible object for the "interact with object" objectives to prevent having to place visible things like the padds.
These Ferasans shame us all! They don't even know how the disruptors work! (This is sarcasm)
I'Zira's soldiers will show them how it is done. (Also a joke)
Some Ferasan raiders have #1 beside their names.
Shadow Base
You might want to make it so your medical officer refers to you as your rank. Unless you explain earlier in the story you let your crew do that.
9:16] [NPC] Medical Officer: Taka, It looks like they're being experimented on. We should try to get them out of here. The Caitian patients have a number by their name. Not sure if this is intended. Suggest removing it.
I noticed usage a few times of the "continue" button. I suggest changing these to responses from your captain.
Ferasan/Caitian hybrids..an interesting concept.
One of the npcs in the "more children" objective was a Fek'lhri. Think you missed a costume there.
I noticed others in the reviews suggested you use a Klingon interior for a Ferasan base. I would agree with this. However, you have already made the mission, so this could be something to keep in mind for future enemy bases.
Overall 5/5, This was the author's first mission and so it will be treated as such. This was a nice and simple first mission by the author. Sometimes simple works perfectly. I sure enjoyed the easygoing ride after all the complex missions I have done or made hehe.
The author clearly demonstrated basic knowledge of the foundry mechanics and shows he has room to have even higher quality content in the next mission.
Comments
Joe
Please leave comments or suggestions on the main thread for Homage to Galris at the following link.
Also feel free to check out some of my other projects at the following link.
I think it'd be a better playing experience for everyone to wait cause then the authors can make sure everything is working correctly, and the players get the best possible gameplay experience.
Everything looks good to go with my missions xD
My Foundry Missions:
The Wave Empire Series: http://sto-forum.perfectworld.com/showthread.php?t=279751
Ah yes. That would be kind of important lol
My Foundry Missions:
The Wave Empire Series: http://sto-forum.perfectworld.com/showthread.php?t=279751
Mission description
Capital is spelled "capitol" in the description.
Atlantis
The interact with the warp gate object says "invisible object."You should change that to something else.
Good use of triggers to make things appear and disappear. I suggest making the nav beacon at waiting for docking procedures bigger.
Capital is spelled "capitol."
Docking Station
Multiple dialogue options are always good, especially when they providing background information on the new characters.
Maybe you should use just a few more npcs to fill the rest of the area out. Examples being the meeting room on the opposite end from where the player spawns.
Loerina
A very nice city. Excellent job on the custom work.
I probably should have explored more before moving on hehe.
Ascended Council
The Ascended are floating in the air above their chairs in the meeting room. I am not sure if the way the chairs are shaped prevented them from being seated right. Take a look at fixing this if possible. If the chairs do not allow it then disregard this.
[3:12] [NPC] Ascended Loriyen: We are aware of your accomplishments Vice Admiral, and have full confidence in your ability to find out what has happened to Ascended Uioda. The last place we where aware of his consciousness was in his living quarters.
Were is spelled as 'where."
Living Quarters
Nothing major to note here.
Ascended Council
2 phantasms provide an interesting battle.
Nothing major to note.
Loerina, take 2
I like the "war' going on. Being able to skip combat is good.
Atlantis
Beaming over the body has an object named "object 1"
Should rename that.
This was an excellent introduction to a series and mission overall. The maps were clean and well-used. Some were simple, others were more detailed, all did what they were meant to accomplish. Dialogue was very well written and excellent y clean. I recommend users bring rep traits or gear for damage resistance to Psi damage as you will strictly fight Psi damage enemies.
Excellent job! 5/5.
Mission description
Nothing major to note.
Undisclosed location
The ships are named things like "Federation Escort 5." I recommend renaming each ship to have its own unique name. That adds a major level of detail.
This map could be reworked into dialogue on the next map or in the grant mission dialogue. Only one task does not provide much when the dialogue is small enough to fit somewhere else. If you remove this map, it would reduce the load times for your players. It is up to you though.
Eclipse Interior
One group of NPCs I assumed were made to patrol are standing in the first hallway staring at the wall.
Multiple dialogue options are always good.
Undisclosed location
Nothing major to note.
Reliokah
Nice map visuals right off the bat.
Surface
Excellent wreckage, well placed.
Research facility
You could add optional dialogues with some of the prisoners as extra content.
Nice plot twist.
Reliokah space once more
Nothing major to note.
Fallback
I recommend giving each ship here an unique name.
This mission could have dialogue put somewhere else in order to avoid using a whole map just for one purpose.
Eclipse bridge
The officers are floating in their chairs. Recommend seeing if you could fix that.
Once again, another great mission. 5/5. I have one thing to note. I noticed you have people reach an area when doing a map transfer sometimes. These instances do not have an objective marker. I suggest making sure the player is always programmed to leave from the "whole map" instead of relying on this. Some people may not realize they need to go to a door and think the mission is bugged.
Waveloid Embassy
Some nice custom map work in the Ambassador's office.
Great dialogue.
There is some minor wall clipping by the time machine/
Reliokah
The item to use for the energize command is named "invisible object." You should change that.
Some combat being optional is nice.
Reliokah surface
A very well-made map.
Temporal research facility
Nothing major to note.
Unknown location
Nothing major to note.
5/5 stars.
Warp Gate
"Object" should be renamed to something like "Docking bay" etc.
Station
NPCs are floating in their chairs.
A group of npcs I assume to be a patrol is stuck facing a wall on top of some benches.
2:45] [NPC] Captain Yuina Skyline: (Blushes) Well here are the passes you and your crew will need to get onto the shuttle. (You recieve Waveloid shuttle passes) The shuttle number is F292.
When it gets here the shuttle will be docked in loading bay C. You can get there by using the south eastern door of this hub. Once aboard feel free to come by the bridge. I will be helping coordinate routine brigde operations.
Bridge has a typo in it.
Shuttle 292
Nothing major to note.
Prison
The courtroom is a nice creation.
Achilles system
This system has a nice and clean asteroid field you put together.
"Object" should be renamed to something to match the story.
Unknown LOcation
Nice map work with the nebula.
Breen ship
Nothing major to note.
Eclipse Bridge
A nice bridge.
Once again, nothing major to note besides a few minor issues. I still recommend having characters leave from the whole map and not using a specific object. There isn't a waypoint marker on some of them so it makes it harder for players to find it.
5/5.
First map
I recommend increasing the radius on the reach marker.
Animus System
Nothing major to note.
Celebration Map
Nothing major to note.
Deep space
Some great effects here.
Object is named "Invisible object" for space walk.
The villain's ally ships have numbers in their names and should be renamed.
The same is true for the battle versions.
Every interact object on this map is named "Invisible object"
Cruiser
Nothing major to note.
Bridge
Nice effects here.
Base of Operations
Nothing major to note.
Bridge level
Nothing major to note.
Bridge level
A good ending to a series.
4/5. This mission had some minor issues that have been throughout the series. I felt these hit the immersion negatively sometimes. Great job!
Overall Series Thoughts
This was a very good series but did have some minor issues present throughout the entire thing. The 2 issues were objects maintaining default names and and not being able to transfer from a whole map. Some map transitions could be hard to find due to a lack of way point markers. I suggest changing every map transition to leave from the whole map if possible.
Besides those needed changes, you have done well. I hope you continue to have future success!
Whelp, I lost all of my review notes while playing the mission, but I can list the main things here.
Your biggest strength was your superb map-making skills. You are very good with the tool. I was not sure however, if this was intended to be a serious or comedic mission if not both. This is mainly due in part to dialogue like "OMG" in the middle of it. I also found many typos throughout the story. I suggest going back or having a friend take notes on them for you in a review. In addition, some npcs had default foundry names, I suggest fixing those.
Well done.
4/5 stars.
For that catch with reach marker problem, as I said you could simply enlarge the radius of it.. a lot... or you can substitute it with an invisible object. I advice for it because you can eventually get a direction to current objective (the inv obj in this case) pressing the V button. But I think the first move will suffice...
USS Simba first interior map
Your strolling officers have become almost your signature...
I see some fine customisation on the level, and very cured background dialogues too.
Get past energy... space map
Good customizing here ! I like the fieryness of it...
I liked it a lot... the only downtime was the security question regarding the lions, it was all too easy and a bit out of place.
Some problems getting the hook to markers here... Ha, remans... like the tomatoes... or the wednesdays!
Strong enemies... had fun destroying them. Some lagging issue... I have noted the same on some of my own, and I suspect the
culprits are that nice asteroids with square buildings/pumps on... use that gadgets with parsimony.
find the ferasan map... WHAT... I cannot see a damned thing... you should rename this place Arrakis... with a grin I read on the
mission objectives "observe your surroundings..." yeah, try it...
Hey... do not misunderstand me, I like this setup a lot.
Undines... this means I will die a lot of times.
And the Breen thereafter... I like this ground combats more than usual... and I am not a big fan of ground c., remember ?
I would like put some more hints on how Remans got an alliance with these Ferasans in dialogs, or what do they gain with each other alliance.
However, action is good, and is sustained rather well by dialogs. I still waiting for your proverbial ground massacre that will took blood 'n sweat 'n at least an hour to clear...
A keycard to open an underground entrance ? What, like a motel of some sort... ?
About the funny things on missions... I liked the klingons doing exercise in their spare time waiting for action...
bring the ferasans to justice map
I found very unlikely to have such a troubled an windy atmosphere in a closed interior - you clearly used an exterior weather effect, and here unfits bigtime... you should try to that kind of fog that rest at ground level maybe.
Lots of Ferasan to toast, but they are rather easily disposable, plus there is a good variety on things to take cover behind.
Realized Commander Boulevard and his attack group are Gorn in disguise... when the commander began to throw large rocks at me...
Here it is... the boss fight with the Reman dog...
Though one indeed...
A cardassian elevator cabin... this time makes sense here.
ferasan research toxin level
hmm... talk to the deceased elachi button to be rewritten somehow... and so the "talk to.."'s on all the other deceased ones in
the room.
However I found very interesting the talk to the Undine kept prisoner...
stop the ferasan ambush map:
Again problems with hook to reach marker prior to space combat... spent almost 30 min to get past...I was about to abort the entire mission...
BTW F.S.F. stands for...?
I like your idea of "controlled" spaceships other factions... I could lend the idea... not to mention I could produce a Caitian vs Ferasan mission of my own
4 stars, the missing one only because of annoyances into getting hook in space reach markers.
Very well done.
PS- I choose to not reload the mission with the enlarged reach markers to not restart over from the top... I am sure that the problem was solved... that's for the next ones who will play, and enjoy it
Engage the enemy says "engauge the enemy."
I suggest putting the starting location in the "engage the enemy" line. You want that info everywhere you can get it because many people do not read.
8:52] [NPC] Rational: We wont listen to your Federation lies any longer. All Fighter wings ATTACK.
wont should be won't.
Stargazer's Last Known Location
References were amusing.
The objective "Engageing the enemies" should be "Engaging the enemies."
I can see this mission is meant to not be taken fully seriously. In that case, the puns are funny.
Unique ship names are good.
In, "Go to the Chimera," I suggest increasing the reach marker radius.
U.S.S. Chimera interior
Nice custom costumes on the NPCs.
Good map design off the start.
You can put an invisible object for the "interact with object" objectives to prevent having to place visible things like the padds.
These Ferasans shame us all! They don't even know how the disruptors work! (This is sarcasm)
I'Zira's soldiers will show them how it is done. (Also a joke)
Some Ferasan raiders have #1 beside their names.
Shadow Base
You might want to make it so your medical officer refers to you as your rank. Unless you explain earlier in the story you let your crew do that.
9:16] [NPC] Medical Officer: Taka, It looks like they're being experimented on. We should try to get them out of here. The Caitian patients have a number by their name. Not sure if this is intended. Suggest removing it.
I noticed usage a few times of the "continue" button. I suggest changing these to responses from your captain.
Ferasan/Caitian hybrids..an interesting concept.
One of the npcs in the "more children" objective was a Fek'lhri. Think you missed a costume there.
I noticed others in the reviews suggested you use a Klingon interior for a Ferasan base. I would agree with this. However, you have already made the mission, so this could be something to keep in mind for future enemy bases.
Overall 5/5, This was the author's first mission and so it will be treated as such. This was a nice and simple first mission by the author. Sometimes simple works perfectly. I sure enjoyed the easygoing ride after all the complex missions I have done or made hehe.
The author clearly demonstrated basic knowledge of the foundry mechanics and shows he has room to have even higher quality content in the next mission.
Well done!