Attention, long Text and bad english incomming :-D
I've just played "Perfection, Part 1" and want to say my opinion to the mission in the style of our german reviews (long, every little thing will be sayed, like here: Link about one of my missions which the poster liked)
So, let's roll...
Frist of, it's a damn good mission. I've played it about one and a half hour (without writting it would be the half, I think), but it feeled like an half, maximum. I liked the story and everone who doesn't played that mission: do it. do it now! Instandly!
The Idea with the music was great too (but it was a little but anoying to restart it all the time... but I didn't want to download it only for the play of that one mission ^.^
So, now to the things I've noticed. (SPOILERALERT!)
Remember: I like this mission, it is meaned as a constructive review what could be better and make your great mission even more... perfectly :P
Description
- The update-informations aren't important in any way, they can go away.
- Why is the time of the mission hidden in the text? Better would it be to make a list (time, main focus, start System, etc.)
- Nice reference to Hive and the STO-STFs
- Is it a singleplayer mission or can it played in a team? Some of my missions are only for single players 'cause of dialog-trees
Grant mission Dialog
- There are reference to the old sector-system, they can go away.
- Make a reference to your mission in the start-button ("start: perfection, Part 1"). I've 3 missions that start on this system. If your mission wasn't in english I had to try out and could land in an other mission, wich I don't want to play now. Including a long loadscreen
1. Map - Bridge
- Funny thing: "Greetings Flottenadmiral Cran." Yeah, that comes from my german-seted launcher, but it's funny
- Wait, M'Savabi is a Vice Admiral and I'm an Fleetadmiral? She is under my rank so I give the orders! Making an optional dialog for players like me would nice here (or replace all [Rank] with "Captain", that's the way I'm doing it, too)
2. Map - Unkwon System
- Dialog-answer "tired of blowing up cubes" ehm. Nope. That are the borg. Yeah, they are not the big enemy from the series in STO, but the Borg. A second answer "Puh, Luck for us" would be nice here.
- Very nice system, btw.
- Short map... Only a fight and two dialogs? wyh not scanning the taktical cube, take out the defensivs from that cube (Borgprobes, dressed up as "nauscaan probes" in the tactical cube and named "borgcube - defense systems") or "hacking" the defense system would make it better.
3. Map - Tactical Cube
- It looks a little bit empty... Why don't make a custom interior? There can be made fantastic things with not so empty looking rooms and without long walkways. Here is one from benalexanders mission "Das Helios Projekt" >link< (yeah, it's german, In know) and one from me: >link< (a little bit older...)
- 3 Groups for the ambush are ok, but they don't have to be all in the "kill target"-goal. They Player will kill them anyway and it doesn't look like "kill 0/3 mudcrabs"-MMO-TRIBBLE. We are the Foundry, we are better than this (this count for the entire mission)
- "May the Lion's Pride be with you", lol, nice
- Looong walkways at goal "Reach the data node center". A custom-interior would fix that problem.
4. Map - Section 777
- With a custom interior this non-essential map-change wouldn't be here = not siting 2-5 minutes in a loadingscreen
- Long walkways. But, tehre are Borg on my way, so it isn't just walking, it's walking and killing borg. Could be shorter (you now what comes now? right! suctom-interiors ftw )
- numbered Borg-drones. Nice work, not everyone do that much details
- The forcefield is cut away on the upper half of that door. That could be fixed with a second field 7.347 higher and 0.186 nearer in the room (so it would look like one big forcefield wish fills the door completely and has no texturefighting or stuff like that.
- Why a Fed-Forcefield? We have borg-forcefields in the foundry.
- Why do I deactivate the forcefield not on one of the borgconsole near to it? would be more logical to do it this way.
- Synchronized with the pop-up of the dialog, the forcefield disapears, but dialog says it is still there. you could make a interact, than the pop-up with the unlock-system and than a second interact, wich deactivated the forcefield.
- The query from the forcefield is a nice trekkie-service, but I don't think that the borg would use something like that.
- Donatra
- I would make that talking with my BO after the the dialoque with donatra optional (one "hands on weapons!" and one "hey BO, let's talk")
- Ok, there are Borg-drones on ESD. That's ok and important for the mission. But how can they come there? I mean, it's ESD, theys must have some secureness so THIS could not happen. I miss a "wait what?"-answer.
5. Map - Unkown System
- Hrm... Not much to do.
- We can use this Borg-Transwarpgate with no problems? No secure-systems? Nothing to do here for me in this short map? Why?
6. Map - Outpost 77
- Same backdrop like Map 5, why not make one map out of the two? Especially with such short maps. I was the same time on that maps like in the loadscreens...
- No Dialog at the Map-beginning. Why not? My BO could say "Cap, they are attacking them, we must do something". One Dialoque-window would be enough
7. Map - Earth under fire
- Same with Map 5 and 6: All of them have the same backdrop, so why not make one out of them? With triggers and the warp-effects this would be possible (or the Q-flash. Or something else)
- Where does that transwarpgates and Unimatrices come from? I thought they are bases like ESD or SB24 and can't be moved. Or can the borg now cuild them in high-speed?
8. Map - ESD
- Old ESD
- The Borg-Cage in Quinns office stucks in the ground.
°Not like the Borg-cage in the sick-bay, this is perfect placed
- Nice customise of the map
- The Borg-cage in the exchange is a little bit (between 0.08 and 1) to high
- Donatra reminds me a little bit on GLADOS from Portal. And I like GLADOS
9. Map - Sol System
- Why are all ships from the two waves in the kill target goal? They are near enough to eacht other, so you must kill them all, If only one from them in in the kill target-goal (this counts for the entire mission)
- Very Short
- And again, why can we use a Borg-Gateway that easy?
10. Map Warp
- *sigh* why this map? it means another minutes looking at the loadingscreen. But that dialoque (wich is very good!) in the map before, maybe with a "[OOC]x hours later[/OOC]". Player will udnerstand.
- Does this Log have a stardate with nanoseconds? Funny ^^
Rated and Dili is incomming. And even if it looks like I would hate this mission, it's not that way. It was fantastic, but, there are this things which I noticed while playing. I like your dialoques and the story ist really fantastic (I can't say it enough times) and everybody should play it.
Greetings from germany
AgarwaenCran aká Senachrt aká farnihr
PS: Yeah,I know. With a post like that I confirm all prejudices against us germans... wörk. wörk. efficiency! wörk. wörk. :-P
Hey there, thanks for your review! I will look at using some of these suggestions for more fixes in the future. I actually just updated the start information to align with the new sector space, so that issue is solved.
A lot in this mission is very basic as it was my first to be made well over a year ago. I've gotten slowly better over time.
To address the maps for 5, 6, and 7, I didn't really know much about the object transitions, and I have yet to experiment with that, hence why it wasn't used. On the borg forcefield, I could not find one that was rectangular enough for that doorway.
All my missions can be played in multiplayer. However, certain missions, like part 2, will spawn duplicates of important npc ships due to the way scaling works.
Also, on the music part, I've been working on trying to find extended versions of some songs to prevent the constant need for reloading. Unfortunately for some, I have yet to find said extended versions.
Hey there, thanks for your review! I will look at using some of these suggestions for more fixes in the future. I actually just updated the start information to align with the new sector space, so that issue is solved.
A lot in this mission is very basic as it was my first to be made well over a year ago. I've gotten slowly better over time.
To address the maps for 5, 6, and 7, I didn't really know much about the object transitions, and I have yet to experiment with that, hence why it wasn't used. On the borg forcefield, I could not find one that was rectangular enough for that doorway.
All my missions can be played in multiplayer. However, certain missions, like part 2, will spawn duplicates of important npc ships due to the way scaling works.
Also, on the music part, I've been working on trying to find extended versions of some songs to prevent the constant need for reloading. Unfortunately for some, I have yet to find said extended versions.
No problem, I have to thank for the mission Hmmm... funny timing ^^
That does not matter, it is right now a good mission, but I see a lot of things that can be make the mission even more better ^^
It is actually not that hard. You have a beacon/unvissible object or something else to interact with and a "interact with"-goal named "go to warp" or something in that way.
After interact with that all things on the map are triggered to invisible and some of this warp effect-objects are going visible. At the End of a little flight there is another interact with-goal named "going under warp" or somethign like that and all objects from the next map triggert to visible. It's a much work to do that, but it is it worth. I bet kirkfat has made a tutorial for that (if not, I can give a german tutorial by timeras...) But take the time, you need ^^ And things, that are on maps from the beginning can't be made be invisible, taht could be a problem with the sol-system... maybe you can only make map 5 and 6 the one map...
About the borg-forcefield: They are two you can use. One looks like a pyramide, but under the sides, there are vertical "forcefieldwalls" wich can used for doors.
The other looks like a beam or somethign like that, a few of them one above the other can be used for a good looking borg-field as well ^^
Yeah, but people don't now that. It is possible that they search for "team" in the description and would not find your mission. it's a little bit helpfullier
Yeah, I think that problem can't really be fixed, but the music is great and if you don't find longer versions let them the way, how they are right now ^^
btw, I have a bad idea... I'm doing Foudnry Let's Play as well. If you want I can make a "special english version" for your second part, so you can see life, what I mean (and I must not type an hour long so long posts... xD) I could make this "only visible for users who have the url" two and stuff. For an author it is evertime good top see his own mission from the pov of another player, that don't know, what he will see.
Oh, forgot this almost. The reason you follow M'Sarabi's orders is because that mission was built long before the expansion existed, so everyone was still running around as VAs at best. However, the scenario is different later on in my upcoming missions. You'll be able to refer to them just by their normal names for a reason you will see. It would be a massive undertaking to try and replace every time the rank is used with captain considering the amount of dialogue there is, especially in later missions.
They could way more dialogue heavy than perfection 1 does.
I will start doing an update everytime I get some work done so y'all have an idea of my progress.
Today's update:
Managed to write a decent amount of dialogue on map 2. I laid out the key npcs and objects that will be used for the main story steps. I also added all the main story steps for map 2 so I have the outline ready. Will just need to fill them in. Once the main story steps are finished, I will go about on adding the various wildlife nps and optional objectives that will be on the map. You can choose to go straight through the few story steps, or take your time and explore for optional objectives on the map!
Thank you for the video playthrough. I loved it. I went nuts when you started playing the music . I never got to hear it being played for someone, and it matched so perfectly.....It sounded like it was from the game itself. That is how I always wanted it to sound! I hope you can do more videos of the series!
Today's foundry update
Some minor scenery work added to map 2 but mostly added some additional npcs to an optional dialogue in map 1 which relates to a main story dialogue piece on map 2. Only need to work on the final dialogue of map 2 for the main storyline and finish adding the scenery to the objective area, then I'll go back to adding scenery and optionals in map 2 and map 1.
Thank you for the video playthrough. I loved it. I went nuts when you started playing the music . I never got to hear it being played for someone, and it matched so perfectly.....It sounded like it was from the game itself. That is how I always wanted it to sound! I hope you can do more videos of the series!
Hmmm... My english seems to be better than I thought Thank you
I think, I will do so, but not that often. 'cause my yt-account is normaly in german and I think most of the audience doesn't have a that good english
More minor scenery work and all the main objectives and dialogue hooked up on map 2. Not much was able to be done since I was doing research most of the day. I plan to build my first custom cave on the 3rd map but must wait till the current foundry editor bugs disappear. Luckily, plenty of polishing left on the first two maps!
A normie goes "Oh, what's this?"
An otaku goes "UwU, what's this?"
A furry goes "OwO, what's this?"
A werewolf goes "Awoo, what's this?"
"It's nothing personal, I just don't feel like I've gotten to know a person until I've sniffed their crotch." "We said 'no' to Mr. Curiosity. We're not home. Curiosity is not welcome, it is not to be invited in. Curiosity...is bad. It gets you in trouble, it gets you killed, and more importantly...it makes you poor!"
Passion and Serenity are one.
I gain power by understanding both.
In the chaos of their battle, I bring order.
I am a shadow, darkness born from light.
The Force is united within me.
Today's foundry update:
Added more NPCs to the first map. Quite a few will have optional dialogue to learn about M'Sarabi's research camp and to provide players with stuff to find. One dialogue in particular may point to an upcoming event later in the mission.
Comments
I've just played "Perfection, Part 1" and want to say my opinion to the mission in the style of our german reviews (long, every little thing will be sayed, like here: Link about one of my missions which the poster liked)
So, let's roll...
Frist of, it's a damn good mission. I've played it about one and a half hour (without writting it would be the half, I think), but it feeled like an half, maximum. I liked the story and everone who doesn't played that mission: do it. do it now! Instandly!
The Idea with the music was great too (but it was a little but anoying to restart it all the time... but I didn't want to download it only for the play of that one mission ^.^
So, now to the things I've noticed. (SPOILERALERT!)
Remember: I like this mission, it is meaned as a constructive review what could be better and make your great mission even more... perfectly :P
Description
- The update-informations aren't important in any way, they can go away.
- Why is the time of the mission hidden in the text? Better would it be to make a list (time, main focus, start System, etc.)
- Nice reference to Hive and the STO-STFs
- Is it a singleplayer mission or can it played in a team? Some of my missions are only for single players 'cause of dialog-trees
Grant mission Dialog
- There are reference to the old sector-system, they can go away.
- Make a reference to your mission in the start-button ("start: perfection, Part 1"). I've 3 missions that start on this system. If your mission wasn't in english I had to try out and could land in an other mission, wich I don't want to play now. Including a long loadscreen
1. Map - Bridge
- Funny thing: "Greetings Flottenadmiral Cran." Yeah, that comes from my german-seted launcher, but it's funny
- Wait, M'Savabi is a Vice Admiral and I'm an Fleetadmiral? She is under my rank so I give the orders! Making an optional dialog for players like me would nice here (or replace all [Rank] with "Captain", that's the way I'm doing it, too)
2. Map - Unkwon System
- Dialog-answer "tired of blowing up cubes" ehm. Nope. That are the borg. Yeah, they are not the big enemy from the series in STO, but the Borg. A second answer "Puh, Luck for us" would be nice here.
- Very nice system, btw.
- Short map... Only a fight and two dialogs? wyh not scanning the taktical cube, take out the defensivs from that cube (Borgprobes, dressed up as "nauscaan probes" in the tactical cube and named "borgcube - defense systems") or "hacking" the defense system would make it better.
3. Map - Tactical Cube
- It looks a little bit empty... Why don't make a custom interior? There can be made fantastic things with not so empty looking rooms and without long walkways. Here is one from benalexanders mission "Das Helios Projekt" >link< (yeah, it's german, In know) and one from me: >link< (a little bit older...)
- 3 Groups for the ambush are ok, but they don't have to be all in the "kill target"-goal. They Player will kill them anyway and it doesn't look like "kill 0/3 mudcrabs"-MMO-TRIBBLE. We are the Foundry, we are better than this
- "May the Lion's Pride be with you", lol, nice
- Looong walkways at goal "Reach the data node center". A custom-interior would fix that problem.
4. Map - Section 777
- With a custom interior this non-essential map-change wouldn't be here = not siting 2-5 minutes in a loadingscreen
- Long walkways. But, tehre are Borg on my way, so it isn't just walking, it's walking and killing borg. Could be shorter (you now what comes now? right! suctom-interiors ftw
- numbered Borg-drones. Nice work, not everyone do that much details
- The forcefield is cut away on the upper half of that door. That could be fixed with a second field 7.347 higher and 0.186 nearer in the room (so it would look like one big forcefield wish fills the door completely and has no texturefighting or stuff like that.
- Why a Fed-Forcefield? We have borg-forcefields in the foundry.
- Why do I deactivate the forcefield not on one of the borgconsole near to it? would be more logical to do it this way.
- Synchronized with the pop-up of the dialog, the forcefield disapears, but dialog says it is still there. you could make a interact, than the pop-up with the unlock-system and than a second interact, wich deactivated the forcefield.
- The query from the forcefield is a nice trekkie-service, but I don't think that the borg would use something like that.
- Donatra
- I would make that talking with my BO after the the dialoque with donatra optional (one "hands on weapons!" and one "hey BO, let's talk")
- Ok, there are Borg-drones on ESD. That's ok and important for the mission. But how can they come there? I mean, it's ESD, theys must have some secureness so THIS could not happen. I miss a "wait what?"-answer.
5. Map - Unkown System
- Hrm... Not much to do.
- We can use this Borg-Transwarpgate with no problems? No secure-systems? Nothing to do here for me in this short map? Why?
6. Map - Outpost 77
- Same backdrop like Map 5, why not make one map out of the two? Especially with such short maps. I was the same time on that maps like in the loadscreens...
- No Dialog at the Map-beginning. Why not? My BO could say "Cap, they are attacking them, we must do something". One Dialoque-window would be enough
7. Map - Earth under fire
- Same with Map 5 and 6: All of them have the same backdrop, so why not make one out of them? With triggers and the warp-effects this would be possible (or the Q-flash. Or something else)
- Where does that transwarpgates and Unimatrices come from? I thought they are bases like ESD or SB24 and can't be moved. Or can the borg now cuild them in high-speed?
8. Map - ESD
- Old ESD
- The Borg-Cage in Quinns office stucks in the ground.
°Not like the Borg-cage in the sick-bay, this is perfect placed
- Nice customise of the map
- The Borg-cage in the exchange is a little bit (between 0.08 and 1) to high
- Donatra reminds me a little bit on GLADOS from Portal. And I like GLADOS
9. Map - Sol System
- Why are all ships from the two waves in the kill target goal? They are near enough to eacht other, so you must kill them all, If only one from them in in the kill target-goal (this counts for the entire mission)
- Very Short
- And again, why can we use a Borg-Gateway that easy?
10. Map Warp
- *sigh* why this map? it means another minutes looking at the loadingscreen. But that dialoque (wich is very good!) in the map before, maybe with a "[OOC]x hours later[/OOC]". Player will udnerstand.
- Does this Log have a stardate with nanoseconds? Funny ^^
Rated and Dili is incomming. And even if it looks like I would hate this mission, it's not that way. It was fantastic, but, there are this things which I noticed while playing. I like your dialoques and the story ist really fantastic (I can't say it enough times) and everybody should play it.
Greetings from germany
AgarwaenCran aká Senachrt aká farnihr
PS: Yeah,I know. With a post like that I confirm all prejudices against us germans... wörk. wörk. efficiency! wörk. wörk. :-P
Der Mod spielt
A lot in this mission is very basic as it was my first to be made well over a year ago. I've gotten slowly better over time.
To address the maps for 5, 6, and 7, I didn't really know much about the object transitions, and I have yet to experiment with that, hence why it wasn't used. On the borg forcefield, I could not find one that was rectangular enough for that doorway.
All my missions can be played in multiplayer. However, certain missions, like part 2, will spawn duplicates of important npc ships due to the way scaling works.
Also, on the music part, I've been working on trying to find extended versions of some songs to prevent the constant need for reloading. Unfortunately for some, I have yet to find said extended versions.
No problem, I have to thank for the mission
That does not matter, it is right now a good mission, but I see a lot of things that can be make the mission even more better ^^
It is actually not that hard.
After interact with that all things on the map are triggered to invisible and some of this warp effect-objects are going visible. At the End of a little flight there is another interact with-goal named "going under warp" or somethign like that and all objects from the next map triggert to visible. It's a much work to do that, but it is it worth. I bet kirkfat has made a tutorial for that (if not, I can give a german tutorial by timeras...) But take the time, you need ^^ And things, that are on maps from the beginning can't be made be invisible, taht could be a problem with the sol-system... maybe you can only make map 5 and 6 the one map...
About the borg-forcefield: They are two you can use. One looks like a pyramide, but under the sides, there are vertical "forcefieldwalls" wich can used for doors.
The other looks like a beam or somethign like that, a few of them one above the other can be used for a good looking borg-field as well ^^
Yeah, but people don't now that. It is possible that they search for "team" in the description and would not find your mission. it's a little bit helpfullier
Yeah, I think that problem can't really be fixed, but the music is great and if you don't find longer versions let them the way, how they are right now ^^
btw, I have a bad idea... I'm doing Foudnry Let's Play as well. If you want I can make a "special english version" for your second part, so you can see life, what I mean (and I must not type an hour long so long posts... xD) I could make this "only visible for users who have the url" two and stuff. For an author it is evertime good top see his own mission from the pov of another player, that don't know, what he will see.
Der Mod spielt
I'm trying to make my 7th episode atm so I need players to catch things that may pop up in the original 6.
What do you mean, the video or texts like that?
Der Mod spielt
They could way more dialogue heavy than perfection 1 does.
Today's update:
Managed to write a decent amount of dialogue on map 2. I laid out the key npcs and objects that will be used for the main story steps. I also added all the main story steps for map 2 so I have the outline ready. Will just need to fill them in. Once the main story steps are finished, I will go about on adding the various wildlife nps and optional objectives that will be on the map. You can choose to go straight through the few story steps, or take your time and explore for optional objectives on the map!
I've choose the video-way, so you have something to laugh about (my english)
After it is rendert this night (here in germany, we have 10pm right now), I will upload it midday CEST/GMT+1, so it should be watchably at ~3am GMT-8
Der Mod spielt
After youtube finished his quality-setting it will be 1080p (right now only 360p... -.-)
Have fun
Der Mod spielt
Thanks, I'll give it a listen while working on my episode tonight.
And in terms of my name, I always just pronounced it with the I being a short i sound in English
Some minor scenery work added to map 2 but mostly added some additional npcs to an optional dialogue in map 1 which relates to a main story dialogue piece on map 2. Only need to work on the final dialogue of map 2 for the main storyline and finish adding the scenery to the objective area, then I'll go back to adding scenery and optionals in map 2 and map 1.
Hmmm... My english seems to be better than I thought
I think, I will do so, but not that often. 'cause my yt-account is normaly in german and I think most of the audience doesn't have a that good english
Der Mod spielt
More minor scenery work and all the main objectives and dialogue hooked up on map 2. Not much was able to be done since I was doing research most of the day. I plan to build my first custom cave on the 3rd map but must wait till the current foundry editor bugs disappear. Luckily, plenty of polishing left on the first two maps!
Not much to really talk about today!
#LegalizeAwoo
A normie goes "Oh, what's this?"
An otaku goes "UwU, what's this?"
A furry goes "OwO, what's this?"
A werewolf goes "Awoo, what's this?"
"It's nothing personal, I just don't feel like I've gotten to know a person until I've sniffed their crotch."
"We said 'no' to Mr. Curiosity. We're not home. Curiosity is not welcome, it is not to be invited in. Curiosity...is bad. It gets you in trouble, it gets you killed, and more importantly...it makes you poor!"
Got a problem with it?
Said there would be daily updates. That means informing people daily whether anything was done or not.
Added more NPCs to the first map. Quite a few will have optional dialogue to learn about M'Sarabi's research camp and to provide players with stuff to find. One dialogue in particular may point to an upcoming event later in the mission.
Was out most of the day so nothing today. I do expect to get quite a bit done tomorrow.
1 star... boo!
Also...
[IMG]Today's Foundry update: Was out most of the day so nothing today. I do expect to get quite a bit done tomorrow.[/IMG]
What?
If Beagle Man is unable to comprehend that message, we are doomed.