1. Will probably remove OOC.
2. I wasn't aware that the reach marker objective failed. I suppose I could add an extra step to the "Hail the Bortasqu'" thingy - the instant success from the reach marker set at your spawn obviously didn't work.
3. I guess I'll have to add some extra dialogue to explain the Borg, Undine, and stuff - if I can figure out some proper ST science for the job. I think I've learnt that I need to do a full spellcheck before submitting for reviews. And as for the Explorer, I'll have to make the non-combat version a holographic decoy... or swap the hail objective out for an interact-dialogue chain.
4. Ok, thanks for the idea.
5. Oops, didn't notice that.
6. The OOC on the 2nd Explorer map, where was that?
7. You mean the Vulcan monk? I might do that once Season 6 hits with the instant interactions. As for the OOC placeholder message, I'm guessing you're referring to the optional objective with the holograms - I'm not exactly able to remove those. I originally had the player re-input their MDCs, but I swapped that out for the placeholder. Thanks for the anesthizine spellcheck, by the way!
8. Again, the security hologram commanders and Aoe'ska? As for the Go to next map thing, I can't make that branch according to MDC, so I had to go generic.
9. Ok, so my clue wasn't obvious enough. Gotta fix that. Thanks for the trigger, I'd do it on the bridge, but circumstances blocked me. This time I'm not sure about where is the dialogue, unless you're referring to the various injured dialogues from the Gerus storyline. I noticed the turbolift too, but haven't gotten around to fixing that yet. By the way, it's D'Hev :biggrin:
10. My only option on the bridge would be to add a large invisible wall at the equator (you know what I mean), but I might consider it. As for all the OOC comments you've made, it's just in my nature - can't make it much shorter than that :redface:
11. Not quite sure where the optional dialogue would be, except the Bortas - you can observe a drifting ship as long as you want, can't you?
12. As I commented in 2., I was unaware of the issue (it did pop up once or twice during testing, but I thought I fixed it) and will fix it as soon as I get back to the Foundry.
Think I marked the parts that I responded to properly, and thanks for the bridge battle comment - though I could have sworn that I heard an explosion every time I tested - BEFORE the battle.
Edit: By the way, Word's toying with your apostrophes again? Fixed it in the quote above though.
I'm glad I could help with your mission.
There was no indication of a way to end the mission. I thought it would be when I beamed the K'rek to the Bortas but nothing happened. I thought there was no end since you had dialogue on the previous map that stated "By the way, the Qo'noS mission is completely optional and you may warp out of it as soon as you arrive if desired". I suspect the trigger you set does not function the way you planned.
As always, everything in my reports are suggestions. You are free to do with them as you like.
Thanks for the note about Word, but it was never a problem before the switch so I suspect it is whatever the forum formatting is. Regardless I appreciate the heads up and I will watch it more closely next report.
Brian
Hello again. I have another one for you. Now that the challenge is over I would like you to review my submission, wich took third place (tied).
Title: A Holo Peace
Hi starkofthenorth,
Thanks for your review request. You are currently 10th in the queue behind q403 (the author formerly known as Q400). I will not be getting back to the queue until next week as I am on my way to Los Angeles in the morning through Saturday. I will get back late on Sunday. So I hope to get started back on the queue on Monday.
I am assuming this is the author formerly known as kirkfat. I will take my files with me this weekend and go through them in what spare time I may have to find my top ten.
There was no indication of a way to end the mission. I thought it would be when I beamed the K'rek to the Bortas but nothing happened. I thought there was no end since you had dialogue on the previous map that stated "By the way, the Qo'noS mission is completely optional and you may warp out of it as soon as you arrive if desired". I suspect the trigger you set does not function the way you planned.
As always, everything in my reports are suggestions. You are free to do with them as you like.
Thanks for the note about Word, but it was never a problem before the switch so I suspect it is whatever the forum formatting is. Regardless I appreciate the heads up and I will watch it more closely next report.
Brian
Yes, I put a Reach Marker objective flat on the player's spawn and gave it a wide radius, but I guess it didn't work.
Infinite possibilities have implications that could not be completely understood if you turned this entire universe into a giant supercomputer.
Seems you've got quite the queue now Evil70th. I suppose I'd better add my new one now before it gets even longer
Mission Title: Sink the Bismarck!
Faction: Federation
Level: 31+
Start: Wolf 359
A Starfleet admiral asks you to participate in the testing of an experimental AI system designed to make space travel safer. But when the system takes control of one of Starfleet's most powerful ships, it's up to you to hunt her down and Sink the Bismarck!
Yes, I put a Reach Marker objective flat on the player's spawn and gave it a wide radius, but I guess it didn't work.
I have found that reach markers on space maps do function if the player is within the radius of the marker when it becomes active. Perhaps try using an object, then the player would also be able to see it on the map.
Thanks for the review request. You are currently 11th in the queue behind starkofthenorth and I hope to pick back up the reviews tomorrow. I will post the review for your mission once I complete it.
Seems you've got quite the queue now Evil70th. I suppose I'd better add my new one now before it gets even longer
Mission Title: Sink the Bismarck!
Faction: Federation
Level: 31+
Start: Wolf 359
A Starfleet admiral asks you to participate in the testing of an experimental AI system designed to make space travel safer. But when the system takes control of one of Starfleet's most powerful ships, it's up to you to hunt her down and Sink the Bismarck!
And as always thanks for all you do!
Hi drogyn1701,
Thanks for the review request and I am glad to be of service. The queue is of good size and you are currently 12th in the queue behind nrobbiec. I hope to get back to the queue tomorrow. I will post the review once I have completed it.
I guess I should ask for a review of my new misson as soon as possible.
Mission Name: The heart of your enemy
Author: diogene0
Minimum Level: +16
Allegiance: KDF
Estimated Mission Length: Up to 60 minutes
Method of Report Delivery: Forum post.
I've polished it a lot more, so you should'nt have to report about so many small typo/caps/mistakes issues, hopefully. If you see a typo or caps issue, though, just tell me "one/several/many typo or caps to check on map N". It will save you time.
I also hope the story and maps are even better now, I've completely changed the way I create missions. You'll tell me.
I guess I should ask for a review of my new misson as soon as possible.
Mission Name: The heart of your enemy
Author: diogene0
Minimum Level: +16
Allegiance: KDF
Estimated Mission Length: Up to 60 minutes
Method of Report Delivery: Forum post.
I've polished it a lot more, so you should'nt have to report about so many small typo/caps/mistakes issues, hopefully. If you see a typo or caps issue, though, just tell me "one/several/many typo or caps to check on map N". It will save you time.
I also hope the story and maps are even better now, I've completely changed the way I create missions. You'll tell me.
Thanks for your help!
Hi diogene0,
Thanks for your review request. You are currently 12th in the queue behind nrobbiec. I did not get a chance to work on the queue tonight, and I am starting a new class tomorrow after work. I am going to try working on the queue starting on Wednesday. I will post your review here as soon as I complete it.
Between work and school I have been very busy lately and things are only going to get worse over the next few weeks. I am working at Comic-Con in San Diego starting this coming Sunday. After that my schedule will clear up for a while and I should be able to relax and review folk's missions a little more steadily than at present. I hope to be able to do a couple of the mission on Wednesday through Friday if I can before I start up at Con.
Sorry it is taking so long everyone. Here is the queue as it stands right now:
Mission 1: The Jeroan Farmer Escapade Author: Grylak
Mission 2: Kai Hard Author: Bazag
Mission 3: The Wave Empire Ep.1 Author: Skyline45
Mission 4: TAS Redux Author: Marhawkman
Mission 5: Thy Own Enemy Author: nrobbiec
Mission 6: The Omega Theorm Author: q403 (Author formerly known as Q400)
Mission 7: Shadows of the Past Author: backyardserenade
Mission 8: Star Trek: Allegiance Author: chicochavez
Hi Evil, I linked Jus In Bello earlier on, but I'd edited a post so you probably missed it, could you tack it on to your review of Six Sick Slick Slim Sycamore Saplings? Jus In Bello is pretty short and serves as the arc's prologue so the next mission will make more sense.
I have a suggestion for your awesome Evil; edit that second post you have to show the current queue. You don't need to do it every time, just occasionally like you've been posting them in your main thread as you go.
Digging to find out what you are doing is fun, but tedious.
But it's just a suggestion, I'm supremely happy with your reviewing and format as is!
Could I submit my mission to review please? I've not had any feedback from anyone yet, and I'd like to know how I did with my first dip into mission making.
Federation level 16+/
The Jeroan Farmer Escapade.
Mission Name: The Jeroan Farmer Escapade
Author: Grylak
Minimum Level: 16
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: st-hucwylcor
Estimated Mission Length: an hour max
Method of Report Delivery: Forum Post
Summary: This is a great mission with good map design, tough battles, and excellent story dialogue. I would definitely recommend this mission to all players who love those elements within a mission.
The use of objects vice NPCs to trigger optional dialogue is recommended to give you the ability to add depth to the story but not distract the player from the main part of the story with multiple "I" icons spread across a map. Those icons can draw a player to read dialogue but when they are done the dialogue prompt remains. With object triggered optional dialogue there are no "I" icons spread all over the map, and the dialogue, and prompt disappear after the player accesses it. It also gives the author the ability to make optional dialogue appear or disappear based on the player?s actions. This gives the author the ability to have branching story dialogue or events on a map. The same method can be used to trigger alternate events or effects. It expands the author's story telling capability from map to map.
Below are some things I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.
Mission Description: This is a good description but consider adding a little more story to draw the player in and make them want to click "Hail". I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this description.
Grant Mission Dialogue: This is a good grant dialogue and follow on dialogue with just enough to make me want to click the "Accept" button, and see where this story takes me. The follow on dialogue with the start location indicated is also well done. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue.
Mission Task: This is a good initial task with a clear start location for the first custom map. I noted no spelling errors with this task.
Mission Entry Prompt: This is a good use of the prompt. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this prompt.
MAPS: Jeroan Space: This is a good map design with well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
Jeroan Farmland: This is a good map design with some good battles. The story dialogue is well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-Consider using objects vice NPC's to trigger optional dialogue. This gives you the ability to add to the story and once the player has accessed the dialogue it goes away.
-Some of the access points are not sitting level. Consider adding a platform of some type under them to make them appear to be supported rather than hanging in open air.
Lab entrance: This is a good map design with some tough battles. The story dialogue is very well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
Main lab: This is a good map design with some tough but fun battles. The story dialogue is very well written. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-Consider using objects vice NPC's to trigger optional dialogue. This gives you the ability to add to the story and once the player has accessed the dialogue it goes away.
-Consider using the same style of consoles you used in the previous maps throughout the mission. This helps keep the player in the story so they are not distracted by a sudden change in console appearance.
-Consider changing "My guess is they somehow discovered about this base and wanted it's secrets" to read "My guess is they somehow discovered this base and wanted its secrets".
-Consider moving the explosion from the "Shut down power" task back a little so it does not engulf the player and the console they activated. It would look better from a story perspective.
-I like your use of player dialogue in the window to give the player more to say other than the limitations of the response button. However you should use either [OOC] or [MissionInfo] dialogue and avoid switching between them.
Jeroan Farmland #2: This is a good map design with some tough but fun battles. The story dialogue is very well written.
-Consider using either [OOC] or [MissionInfo] dialogue and avoid switching between them.
Jeroan Space#2: The map design needs some work. The "fog effect" used does not seem to add anything to the story and is annoying. Consider removing the effect. The battle was good and the story dialogue is well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Consider using either [OOC] or [MissionInfo] dialogue and avoid switching between them.
End Report
Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. You did a great job with this mission. I look forward to playing/reviewing more of your work in the future.
Brian
Hi Evil, I linked Jus In Bello earlier on, but I'd edited a post so you probably missed it, could you tack it on to your review of Six Sick Slick Slim Sycamore Saplings? Jus In Bello is pretty short and serves as the arc's prologue so the next mission will make more sense.
I have added it and it is currently 12th in the queue. Your mission "Six Sick Slick Slim Sycamore Saplings" is currently 9th in the queue. Would you like to swap them out?
I have a suggestion for your awesome Evil; edit that second post you have to show the current queue. You don't need to do it every time, just occasionally like you've been posting them in your main thread as you go.
Digging to find out what you are doing is fun, but tedious.
But it's just a suggestion, I'm supremely happy with your reviewing and format as is!
That is a great suggestion and believe me I understand how annoying tedious can be.
I have added it and it is currently 12th in the queue. Your mission "Six Sick Slick Slim Sycamore Saplings" is currently 9th in the queue. Would you like to swap them out?
I swapped ooc and mission info? Woops. I thought they were all ooc. Being colourblind, they both look the same when I played through.
I'm working on that NPC trigger that makes dialogue dissapear in my second mission. Now I know what I'm doing, I can go back and edit it.
Fog effect on the final map? I didn't put one on. There was an ash effect on jeroan farmland 2, to help represent the breakup of the planet, but not the final map. I'll have a look into that.
Thanks for the review and tips. It's greatly appreciated.
*******************************************
A Romulan Strike Team, Missing Farmers and an ancient base on a Klingon Border world. But what connects them? Find out in my First Foundary mission: 'The Jeroan Farmer Escapade'
I swapped ooc and mission info? Woops. I thought they were all ooc. Being colourblind, they both look the same when I played through.
I'm working on that NPC trigger that makes dialogue dissapear in my second mission. Now I know what I'm doing, I can go back and edit it.
Fog effect on the final map? I didn't put one on. There was an ash effect on jeroan farmland 2, to help represent the breakup of the planet, but not the final map. I'll have a look into that.
Thanks for the review and tips. It's greatly appreciated.
Glad I could help.
The effect I was referring to is on the last map. There seems to be some sort of white out effect that turns everything white except the planet, the ships and the satellite. I?ve seen this effect used before and it has issues. It would probably be the background effect if you did not select a specific effect for it.
Comments
Title: A Holo Peace
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
Can you please pick your top 10 fav missions that you've reviewed. If any of them aren't on the big list, I want to add them. Please post suggestions:
http://sto-forum.perfectworld.com/showthread.php?p=4458851#post4458851
Thanks Bazag. I'll add that to the report.
Brian
I'm glad I could help with your mission.
There was no indication of a way to end the mission. I thought it would be when I beamed the K'rek to the Bortas but nothing happened. I thought there was no end since you had dialogue on the previous map that stated "By the way, the Qo'noS mission is completely optional and you may warp out of it as soon as you arrive if desired". I suspect the trigger you set does not function the way you planned.
As always, everything in my reports are suggestions. You are free to do with them as you like.
Thanks for the note about Word, but it was never a problem before the switch so I suspect it is whatever the forum formatting is. Regardless I appreciate the heads up and I will watch it more closely next report.
Brian
Hi starkofthenorth,
Thanks for your review request. You are currently 10th in the queue behind q403 (the author formerly known as Q400). I will not be getting back to the queue until next week as I am on my way to Los Angeles in the morning through Saturday. I will get back late on Sunday. So I hope to get started back on the queue on Monday.
Thanks for authoring,
Brian
Hi kirksplat,
I am assuming this is the author formerly known as kirkfat.
Brian
Suddenly the puzzle piece falls into place. Thanks or your service, from an Active Duty Second Class to a Veteran Chief.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
It is my honor to have served. Thank you for your continued service.
Brian
U.S. Navy Chief (RET)
Yes, I put a Reach Marker objective flat on the player's spawn and gave it a wide radius, but I guess it didn't work.
Infinite possibilities have implications that could not be completely understood if you turned this entire universe into a giant supercomputer.
Name: SixSickSlickSlimSycamoreSaplings
Author: nrobbiec
Faction Fed
ID: ST-HNVYRAHKJ
Level 46+
Mission Title: Sink the Bismarck!
Faction: Federation
Level: 31+
Start: Wolf 359
A Starfleet admiral asks you to participate in the testing of an experimental AI system designed to make space travel safer. But when the system takes control of one of Starfleet's most powerful ships, it's up to you to hunt her down and Sink the Bismarck!
And as always thanks for all you do!
I have found that reach markers on space maps do function if the player is within the radius of the marker when it becomes active. Perhaps try using an object, then the player would also be able to see it on the map.
Brian
Hi nrobbiec,
Thanks for the review request. You are currently 11th in the queue behind starkofthenorth and I hope to pick back up the reviews tomorrow. I will post the review for your mission once I complete it.
Thanks for authoring,
Brian
Hi drogyn1701,
Thanks for the review request and I am glad to be of service. The queue is of good size and you are currently 12th in the queue behind nrobbiec. I hope to get back to the queue tomorrow. I will post the review once I have completed it.
Thanks for authoring,
Brian
My character Tsin'xing
Mission Name: The heart of your enemy
Author: diogene0
Minimum Level: +16
Allegiance: KDF
Estimated Mission Length: Up to 60 minutes
Method of Report Delivery: Forum post.
I've polished it a lot more, so you should'nt have to report about so many small typo/caps/mistakes issues, hopefully. If you see a typo or caps issue, though, just tell me "one/several/many typo or caps to check on map N". It will save you time.
I also hope the story and maps are even better now, I've completely changed the way I create missions. You'll tell me.
Thanks for your help!
God, lvl 60 CW. 17k.
Hi diogene0,
Thanks for your review request. You are currently 12th in the queue behind nrobbiec. I did not get a chance to work on the queue tonight, and I am starting a new class tomorrow after work. I am going to try working on the queue starting on Wednesday. I will post your review here as soon as I complete it.
Thanks for authoring,
Brian
Hi markhawkman,
Between work and school I have been very busy lately and things are only going to get worse over the next few weeks. I am working at Comic-Con in San Diego starting this coming Sunday. After that my schedule will clear up for a while and I should be able to relax and review folk's missions a little more steadily than at present. I hope to be able to do a couple of the mission on Wednesday through Friday if I can before I start up at Con.
Sorry it is taking so long everyone. Here is the queue as it stands right now:
Mission 1: The Jeroan Farmer Escapade Author: Grylak
Mission 2: Kai Hard Author: Bazag
Mission 3: The Wave Empire Ep.1 Author: Skyline45
Mission 4: TAS Redux Author: Marhawkman
Mission 5: Thy Own Enemy Author: nrobbiec
Mission 6: The Omega Theorm Author: q403 (Author formerly known as Q400)
Mission 7: Shadows of the Past Author: backyardserenade
Mission 8: Star Trek: Allegiance Author: chicochavez
Mission 9: A Holo Peace Author: starkofthenorth
Mission 10: SixSickSlickSlimSycamoreSaplings Author: nrobbiec
Mission 11: Sink the Bismarck! Author: drogyn1701
Mission 12: The heart of your enemy Author: diogene0
Thanks for authoring,
Brian
My character Tsin'xing
Digging to find out what you are doing is fun, but tedious.
But it's just a suggestion, I'm supremely happy with your reviewing and format as is!
Federation Mission - The Jeroan Farmer Escapade
Author: Grylak
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HUCWYLCOR
Report Start
Summary: This is a great mission with good map design, tough battles, and excellent story dialogue. I would definitely recommend this mission to all players who love those elements within a mission.
The use of objects vice NPCs to trigger optional dialogue is recommended to give you the ability to add depth to the story but not distract the player from the main part of the story with multiple "I" icons spread across a map. Those icons can draw a player to read dialogue but when they are done the dialogue prompt remains. With object triggered optional dialogue there are no "I" icons spread all over the map, and the dialogue, and prompt disappear after the player accesses it. It also gives the author the ability to make optional dialogue appear or disappear based on the player?s actions. This gives the author the ability to have branching story dialogue or events on a map. The same method can be used to trigger alternate events or effects. It expands the author's story telling capability from map to map.
Below are some things I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.
Mission Description: This is a good description but consider adding a little more story to draw the player in and make them want to click "Hail". I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this description.
Grant Mission Dialogue: This is a good grant dialogue and follow on dialogue with just enough to make me want to click the "Accept" button, and see where this story takes me. The follow on dialogue with the start location indicated is also well done. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue.
Mission Task: This is a good initial task with a clear start location for the first custom map. I noted no spelling errors with this task.
Mission Entry Prompt: This is a good use of the prompt. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this prompt.
MAPS:
Jeroan Space: This is a good map design with well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
Jeroan Farmland: This is a good map design with some good battles. The story dialogue is well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-Consider using objects vice NPC's to trigger optional dialogue. This gives you the ability to add to the story and once the player has accessed the dialogue it goes away.
-Some of the access points are not sitting level. Consider adding a platform of some type under them to make them appear to be supported rather than hanging in open air.
Lab entrance: This is a good map design with some tough battles. The story dialogue is very well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
Main lab: This is a good map design with some tough but fun battles. The story dialogue is very well written. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-Consider using objects vice NPC's to trigger optional dialogue. This gives you the ability to add to the story and once the player has accessed the dialogue it goes away.
-Consider using the same style of consoles you used in the previous maps throughout the mission. This helps keep the player in the story so they are not distracted by a sudden change in console appearance.
-Consider changing "My guess is they somehow discovered about this base and wanted it's secrets" to read "My guess is they somehow discovered this base and wanted its secrets".
-Consider moving the explosion from the "Shut down power" task back a little so it does not engulf the player and the console they activated. It would look better from a story perspective.
-I like your use of player dialogue in the window to give the player more to say other than the limitations of the response button. However you should use either [OOC] or [MissionInfo] dialogue and avoid switching between them.
Jeroan Farmland #2: This is a good map design with some tough but fun battles. The story dialogue is very well written.
-Consider using either [OOC] or [MissionInfo] dialogue and avoid switching between them.
Jeroan Space#2: The map design needs some work. The "fog effect" used does not seem to add anything to the story and is annoying. Consider removing the effect. The battle was good and the story dialogue is well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Consider using either [OOC] or [MissionInfo] dialogue and avoid switching between them.
End Report
Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. You did a great job with this mission. I look forward to playing/reviewing more of your work in the future.
Brian
I have added it and it is currently 12th in the queue. Your mission "Six Sick Slick Slim Sycamore Saplings" is currently 9th in the queue. Would you like to swap them out?
Brian
I'm sure I will...:)
That is a great suggestion and believe me I understand how annoying tedious can be.
Thanks for the suggestion,
Brian
The story would make more sense
I'm working on that NPC trigger that makes dialogue dissapear in my second mission. Now I know what I'm doing, I can go back and edit it.
Fog effect on the final map? I didn't put one on. There was an ash effect on jeroan farmland 2, to help represent the breakup of the planet, but not the final map. I'll have a look into that.
Thanks for the review and tips. It's greatly appreciated.
A Romulan Strike Team, Missing Farmers and an ancient base on a Klingon Border world. But what connects them? Find out in my First Foundary mission: 'The Jeroan Farmer Escapade'
Original Handle: @Q400
Join Date: December 2010
Then it shall be done.
Thanks
Brian
Glad I could help.
The effect I was referring to is on the last map. There seems to be some sort of white out effect that turns everything white except the planet, the ships and the satellite. I?ve seen this effect used before and it has issues. It would probably be the background effect if you did not select a specific effect for it.
Thanks for authoring,
Brian
Brian