@moonshadowdark: The adventures of Captain Elijah Lowe, a captain full of passion in the face of the unknown that is the Iconian gateway.
Unlike other captains, Lowe seems to be a freer spirit. Reminds me of a certain vice admiral in command of a certain Odyssey Tactical Cruiser.
@ironphoenix113: Admiral Valot shares an intimate moment with Admiral Selana Da'is of the
Republic, and the fate of the Iconian gateways rests in their hands.
A rather fine story of two admirals close enough to each other to share deep secrets with each other, coming off of the FE "Sphere of Influence".
@jonsills: Admiral Sills shares his concerns about the Iconian gateway with his dear friend as he prepares for the opening ceremony.
A more-lighthearted story, but with elements of seriousness, this can serve to flesh out a greater arc concerning New Romulus.
@proteusrex: The first flight of USS Explorer with Captain Dennis Merrik at the helm.
An excellent first LC, which allows for many more interesting adventures of Captain Merrik down the LC line.
@aten66: Admiral Son'aire is displeased with D'Tan's turn of events and confides his concerns with his brother and companions.
A short and simple but nonetheless interesting entry, especially with the introduction of the Romulan delegation and Son'aire's brother.
@wraithshadow13: A venerated celebrity graces Captain Donovan's presence, and hero worship takes the ship's resident prodigy, Wraith.
A masterful working into the story of Ambassador Worf, and a skilled portrayal of the reactions of the crew.
@jaelk: Captain William Fenton of USS Republic is concerned about the gateway opening and has his fears allayed by his wife.
An interesting read, to say the least, having well developed characters, although the story could be tightened a little more closely to certain characters.
@sander233: Along with a portal to who knows where, the Iconian gateway opens up a few emotional scars on Captain Lewis McLain of USS Ray Bradbury.
The many revelations of McLain make the story quite entertaining to read, adding a lot of flesh to a greater narrative for your other stories.
I kept this was one short. It centers on a character named Lewis McLain, who I created for patrickngo to write into "The Chase." He's also made a cameo appearance in "Visiting with the Dead" in which B.C. Hawkes featured as a semi-major character.
I took this LC as an opportunity to show off aspects of McLain that hadn't really been touched on yet, like his genuine fascination with Iconian technology.
@jaelk: Captain William Fenton of USS Republic is concerned about the gateway opening and has his fears allayed by his wife.
An interesting read, to say the least, having well developed characters, although the story could be tightened a little more closely to certain characters.
Thanks for the Feedback, Which characters, how, why and maybe even in what way?
Thanks for the Feedback, Which characters, how, why and maybe even in what way?
J.
Well, since the story is about Billy and Tavia Fenton, you may want to focus on them, especially by showing who is saying what. Like "'That's going to cost you,' Octavia said." As it is, it's a little difficult to see who is saying what.
@ironphoenix113: Admiral Valot shares an intimate moment with Admiral Selana Da'is of the
Republic, and the fate of the Iconian gateways rests in their hands.
A rather fine story of two admirals close enough to each other to share deep secrets with each other, coming off of the FE "Sphere of Influence".
Thanks! Writing Bryan and Selana (both actual in-game characters of mine) as half-siblings that are closer to each other than their actual families (Selana's mother being the notable exception to this; story wise, she did love her mother, though she was killed when she was still quite young) really gives me a chance to reveal the inner workings of both characters in a way I really would have difficulty doing otherwise.
Vice Admiral Bryan Mitchel Valot
Commanding officer: Odyssey class U.S.S. Athena
Admiral of the 1st Assault Fleet
Join date: Some time in Closed Beta
Well, since the story is about Billy and Tavia Fenton, you may want to focus on them, especially by showing who is saying what. Like "'That's going to cost you,' Octavia said." As it is, it's a little difficult to see who is saying what.
@aten66: Admiral Son'aire is displeased with D'Tan's turn of events and confides his concerns with his brother and companions.
A short and simple but nonetheless interesting entry, especially with the introduction of the Romulan delegation and Son'aire's brother.
Thanks! I've mentioned Berg Eria'nos (Son'aire Backwards I loved it at the time) before in one of the past two Lc's I've recently done, except I believe the purple haired, weirdo was the ruler of his timeline/dimension.
@cmdrscarlet: Captain Beringer reacts to the news of the gateway reopening in a professional manner.
It's very nice to see the inner thoughts of a captain sometimes, especially in the face of a momentous occasion such as the gateway opening. Beringer's thoughts are quite well-thought out.
Many thanks!
This LC was a little challenging as I am not really keen on making a "Captain's Log". Although some, such as yourself, incorporate a Log as an intro (and that's cool), it's not my preference. But, given that I have yet to play "Sphere of Influence" and am only halfway through the Cardassian mission series, I was (am) missing a lot of data. SO, I decided a Captain's Log really *was* the best way to work in this LC. After that, it is "what would Kathryn think?" Voila!
If I have not said it already, for those name-checking my characters into your pieces - thank you
"Following the terror on New Romulus from the activation of the Iconian Gateway, write a log entry covering how your crew will adjust to the losses..."
Can't wait to see what the next challenge is :cool:
"Following the terror on New Romulus from the activation of the Iconian Gateway, write a log entry covering how your crew will adjust to the losses..."
Can't wait to see what the next challenge is :cool:
If you'd like, I could write you a synopsis of the story so far in-game, so you can be better prepared when the time comes
Vice Admiral Bryan Mitchel Valot
Commanding officer: Odyssey class U.S.S. Athena
Admiral of the 1st Assault Fleet
Join date: Some time in Closed Beta
"Following the terror on New Romulus from the activation of the Iconian Gateway, write a log entry covering how your crew will adjust to the losses..."
Can't wait to see what the next challenge is :cool:
@wraithshadow13: A venerated celebrity graces Captain Donovan's presence, and hero worship takes the ship's resident prodigy, Wraith.
A masterful working into the story of Ambassador Worf, and a skilled portrayal of the reactions of the crew.
Thank you Sir!
It's actually a lot of fun for me to tie the crew into actual game content as well as getting to used actual characters. I'm debating tossing up another smaller entry, just to kick the hornets nest.
I hope that is the case too. I had a scene idea in my head for the Lyrical Trek revolving around Nottra Natal and Teana Lanister at the Spire Command in the aftermath of the events in "Sphere of Influence" including the showcasing of the TTD as it stays nearby...
Just a heads up that I am going to be extending challenge #53 for an extra 2-weeks. #54 is currently planned to go live on Nov 26, and will be a sort-of Part 2 to this challenge.
Just a heads up that I am going to be extending challenge #53 for an extra 2-weeks. #54 is currently planned to go live on Nov 26, and will be a sort-of Part 2 to this challenge.
Enjoy!
Cheers,
Brandon =/\=
Yay! Thanksgiving treat!
"A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. LLAP"
Just a heads up that I am going to be extending challenge #53 for an extra 2-weeks. #54 is currently planned to go live on Nov 26, and will be a sort-of Part 2 to this challenge.
Enjoy!
Cheers,
Brandon =/\=
I'm already on it.
Elijah sat at the table, deep in personal reflection. "It doesn't make any sense," he pondered, "How do you get to be such an advanced civilization....when your security system acts like a game of memory? They could have at least not make the console flash the password sequence! Iconians....no wonder you died out."
"A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. LLAP"
Just a heads up that I am going to be extending challenge #53 for an extra 2-weeks. #54 is currently planned to go live on Nov 26, and will be a sort-of Part 2 to this challenge.
Enjoy!
Cheers,
Brandon =/\=
Does this mean we get to post a second one to? COme on, pretty pleaseeeeeeee.....:D
Elijah sat at the table, deep in personal reflection. "It doesn't make any sense," he pondered, "How do you get to be such an advanced civilization....when your security system acts like a game of memory? They could have at least not make the console flash the password sequence! Iconians....no wonder you died out."
In a far distant quadrant of Subspace, the three figures gazed at the holographic image floating above the table showing them Elijah pondering. At his words, one chuckled evilly, saying "Oh, he thinks that was our -security- system? How easily fooled these primitives are!"
The other two nodded in agreement, with the second adding "Indeed. Now that they have done our work for us, we can finally get back to work subduing these upstart civilizations. What -were- the Preservers thinking, locking us out of our own outpost with a biometric interface? Especially one tied to the VCR, of all things. Did they think reprogramming that would be an obstacle to any intelligent race?"
The third shrugged. "It -did- take us a few hundred thousand cycles to actually get any carbon-based life to get a gateway working. I might add that pitiful race of surgeons never did figure out how to build any for us, so it's just as well or we'd be sitting here for another hundred thousand cycles."
The second only crossed its arms "I'm still concerned about all the carriers we're suddenly missing, though. Not to mention how many -other- outposts seem to have been ransacked at about the same time. That's going to come back to bite us in the..."
"Oh, do be quiet!" the first said "They probably ended up locking all the doors and can't get out of the command chambers to the rest of the ship. They'll never find..."
"Hey, is that the latest episode of 'Survivor - Qo'nos' he's watching??" the third said, leaning forwards eagerly "Quickly, get us closer!!"
All three quickly returned to the monitor, further issues forgotten as they watched....
Just a heads up that I am going to be extending challenge #53 for an extra 2-weeks. #54 is currently planned to go live on Nov 26, and will be a sort-of Part 2 to this challenge.
Enjoy!
Cheers,
Brandon =/\=
Interesting turn of events. Any chance you can clue us in on to the theme so we can prep entries for when it does go live?
Just a heads up that I am going to be extending challenge #53 for an extra 2-weeks. #54 is currently planned to go live on Nov 26, and will be a sort-of Part 2 to this challenge.
Enjoy!
Cheers,
Brandon =/\=
I think the last time Brandon forced a two-part LC was with "Into the Hive" where part 1 was the preparations for the STF and part two was actually fighting the STF.
If history is any precedent, we will see #54 as either going through "Sphere of Influence" or the fallout of Sphere of Influence.
Of course, if the quantum Zeno effect comes into play, Brandon will change the LC54 prompt just to keep us on our toes. :P
In any case, this is an opportunity for me to write my own version of the older LCs. Ohohohoho.
Just a heads up that I am going to be extending challenge #53 for an extra 2-weeks. #54 is currently planned to go live on Nov 26, and will be a sort-of Part 2 to this challenge.
Comments
Unlike other captains, Lowe seems to be a freer spirit. Reminds me of a certain vice admiral in command of a certain Odyssey Tactical Cruiser.
@ironphoenix113: Admiral Valot shares an intimate moment with Admiral Selana Da'is of the
Republic, and the fate of the Iconian gateways rests in their hands.
A rather fine story of two admirals close enough to each other to share deep secrets with each other, coming off of the FE "Sphere of Influence".
@jonsills: Admiral Sills shares his concerns about the Iconian gateway with his dear friend as he prepares for the opening ceremony.
A more-lighthearted story, but with elements of seriousness, this can serve to flesh out a greater arc concerning New Romulus.
@proteusrex: The first flight of USS Explorer with Captain Dennis Merrik at the helm.
An excellent first LC, which allows for many more interesting adventures of Captain Merrik down the LC line.
@aten66: Admiral Son'aire is displeased with D'Tan's turn of events and confides his concerns with his brother and companions.
A short and simple but nonetheless interesting entry, especially with the introduction of the Romulan delegation and Son'aire's brother.
@wraithshadow13: A venerated celebrity graces Captain Donovan's presence, and hero worship takes the ship's resident prodigy, Wraith.
A masterful working into the story of Ambassador Worf, and a skilled portrayal of the reactions of the crew.
@jaelk: Captain William Fenton of USS Republic is concerned about the gateway opening and has his fears allayed by his wife.
An interesting read, to say the least, having well developed characters, although the story could be tightened a little more closely to certain characters.
@sander233: Along with a portal to who knows where, the Iconian gateway opens up a few emotional scars on Captain Lewis McLain of USS Ray Bradbury.
The many revelations of McLain make the story quite entertaining to read, adding a lot of flesh to a greater narrative for your other stories.
Literary Challenges Entries- Star Trek Online: Lord English
Dramatis Personae of Star Trek Online: Lord English
It's certainly good to learn more about McLain, he seems to be of the same style of Captain Picard, a fantastic entry :cool:
Thanks for the Feedback, Which characters, how, why and maybe even in what way?
J.
Well, since the story is about Billy and Tavia Fenton, you may want to focus on them, especially by showing who is saying what. Like "'That's going to cost you,' Octavia said." As it is, it's a little difficult to see who is saying what.
Literary Challenges Entries- Star Trek Online: Lord English
Dramatis Personae of Star Trek Online: Lord English
Thanks! Writing Bryan and Selana (both actual in-game characters of mine) as half-siblings that are closer to each other than their actual families (Selana's mother being the notable exception to this; story wise, she did love her mother, though she was killed when she was still quite young) really gives me a chance to reveal the inner workings of both characters in a way I really would have difficulty doing otherwise.
Commanding officer: Odyssey class U.S.S. Athena
Admiral of the 1st Assault Fleet
Join date: Some time in Closed Beta
Cool, how does it work now?
J.
PS: Tavia as a nickname is so going to stick.
It's clearer now, especially in regards to who is married to whom. Guess it's not Tavia. Ehehe.
Literary Challenges Entries- Star Trek Online: Lord English
Dramatis Personae of Star Trek Online: Lord English
Thanks! I've mentioned Berg Eria'nos (Son'aire Backwards
~~~~
@marcusdkane:
@knightraider6: Luv it,
@drajora: Love the use of time travel, it was well placed, and intresting for sure!
@cmdrscarlet: Love the ending! Well it was my favorite part at least!
More reviews when I can!
Yeah, I figured it must have needed some tuning when you didn't mention Aliena.
J.
Many thanks!
This LC was a little challenging as I am not really keen on making a "Captain's Log". Although some, such as yourself, incorporate a Log as an intro (and that's cool), it's not my preference. But, given that I have yet to play "Sphere of Influence" and am only halfway through the Cardassian mission series, I was (am) missing a lot of data. SO, I decided a Captain's Log really *was* the best way to work in this LC. After that, it is "what would Kathryn think?" Voila!
If I have not said it already, for those name-checking my characters into your pieces - thank you
"Following the terror on New Romulus from the activation of the Iconian Gateway, write a log entry covering how your crew will adjust to the losses..."
Can't wait to see what the next challenge is :cool:
If you'd like, I could write you a synopsis of the story so far in-game, so you can be better prepared when the time comes
Commanding officer: Odyssey class U.S.S. Athena
Admiral of the 1st Assault Fleet
Join date: Some time in Closed Beta
Heck. Yes.
Wait ... wouldn't that be a big spoiler?
@allen1973 - Is all this information true? I don't recall anyone suggesting the Borg seeded Earth ... but my gods if they did ...
@sander233 - I became fans of all these characters from this piece! Well done due to the brevity
PM's are a beautiful thing
Commanding officer: Odyssey class U.S.S. Athena
Admiral of the 1st Assault Fleet
Join date: Some time in Closed Beta
Thank you Sir!
It's actually a lot of fun for me to tie the crew into actual game content as well as getting to used actual characters. I'm debating tossing up another smaller entry, just to kick the hornets nest.
That would be very helpful, thank you :cool: :cool:
No problem! I should have plenty of time to write tomorrow, because all classes are cancelled. I'll write it up, and send it to you ASAP.
Commanding officer: Odyssey class U.S.S. Athena
Admiral of the 1st Assault Fleet
Join date: Some time in Closed Beta
There's no rush, but thank you very much :cool: :cool:
Just a heads up that I am going to be extending challenge #53 for an extra 2-weeks. #54 is currently planned to go live on Nov 26, and will be a sort-of Part 2 to this challenge.
Enjoy!
Cheers,
Brandon =/\=
Yay! Thanksgiving treat!
-Leonard Nimoy, RIP
I'm already on it.
Elijah sat at the table, deep in personal reflection. "It doesn't make any sense," he pondered, "How do you get to be such an advanced civilization....when your security system acts like a game of memory? They could have at least not make the console flash the password sequence! Iconians....no wonder you died out."
-Leonard Nimoy, RIP
Does this mean we get to post a second one to? COme on, pretty pleaseeeeeeee.....:D
In a far distant quadrant of Subspace, the three figures gazed at the holographic image floating above the table showing them Elijah pondering. At his words, one chuckled evilly, saying "Oh, he thinks that was our -security- system? How easily fooled these primitives are!"
The other two nodded in agreement, with the second adding "Indeed. Now that they have done our work for us, we can finally get back to work subduing these upstart civilizations. What -were- the Preservers thinking, locking us out of our own outpost with a biometric interface? Especially one tied to the VCR, of all things. Did they think reprogramming that would be an obstacle to any intelligent race?"
The third shrugged. "It -did- take us a few hundred thousand cycles to actually get any carbon-based life to get a gateway working. I might add that pitiful race of surgeons never did figure out how to build any for us, so it's just as well or we'd be sitting here for another hundred thousand cycles."
The second only crossed its arms "I'm still concerned about all the carriers we're suddenly missing, though. Not to mention how many -other- outposts seem to have been ransacked at about the same time. That's going to come back to bite us in the..."
"Oh, do be quiet!" the first said "They probably ended up locking all the doors and can't get out of the command chambers to the rest of the ship. They'll never find..."
"Hey, is that the latest episode of 'Survivor - Qo'nos' he's watching??" the third said, leaning forwards eagerly "Quickly, get us closer!!"
All three quickly returned to the monitor, further issues forgotten as they watched....
Interesting turn of events. Any chance you can clue us in on to the theme so we can prep entries for when it does go live?
I think the last time Brandon forced a two-part LC was with "Into the Hive" where part 1 was the preparations for the STF and part two was actually fighting the STF.
If history is any precedent, we will see #54 as either going through "Sphere of Influence" or the fallout of Sphere of Influence.
Of course, if the quantum Zeno effect comes into play, Brandon will change the LC54 prompt just to keep us on our toes. :P
In any case, this is an opportunity for me to write my own version of the older LCs. Ohohohoho.
Literary Challenges Entries- Star Trek Online: Lord English
Dramatis Personae of Star Trek Online: Lord English
Three words "Captain's Log Supplemental".
J.
+1, right here.
Heck, I have yet to actually play the mission