Oh sorry 'bout that. I didn't realize they'd be so uber powerful they'd destroy the universe. LOL. Good explanation. My bad. I like the draft you did after my comment. I got the pictures in my head and everything running smoother.
EDIT: As long as you don't have the avatars say something lame like "Star Power!" you're good. Then again, that does sound good in small douses.
Well they arent like able to destroy the entire universe but I mean imagine if two stars approximately the size of the Sun decided to come to our Solar System and just hover over Earth. It'd kill everything in its path. Thats why they send avatars. Not nearly as powerful but not nearly as dangerous to the planet either.
I can swing with the "Matron Proxima" idea... but it needs one tweak. the last incarnation, sort of iliminates any ambiguity...
that is to say, you turned A&B back into Super Good Guys, and Proxima back into Selfish and Evil...
Take out the part where A&B are "offended" that their Matron is stealing up the energy of planets to try and sustain herself...
Rather, leave it at the point where "A&B realize their mother is weakening, and see an oprotunity to usurp her. Joining their energies together, they are able to match her in strength, and in the end take all but the dregs of her former power"
I like this stance, because it is rather original in the super hero genere.... in that, the Centari are not "good guy and bad guy".... they're embroiled in their own damned thing... interested only in reclaiming their former might (Proxima), or keeping their current power (A&B)
it is the AVATARS themselves.... who eventually become hero and villain... that they transend their "orders" and become more noble, and more villainous than their creators. they, in a sense, aquire Souls of their own... and one day may even choose to fight to protect Earth for its own rights, rather than simply because A&B told them too... (well after Proxima's Chosen has been destroyed and A&B back home have rubbed her nose in it laughing and putting ice down the back of her shirt.)
For the avatars, I was going to make Al a boy and Beta a girl. Proxima's agent is going to be a woman. I think making the agent a woman will make her more cunning and able to use her beauty to manipulate the men in power to do her bidding. Plus there is nothing worse than getting beat up by a chick.
I made a picture of Al using this Portuguese Hero Maker. Its really cool, looks like Timm style a bit.
And here is Beta Centari. I figure I'd let Al be the more flamboyant , hot-headed, fire-on-all cylinders kind of character while Beta would be the level-headed, nobler, classic brick of the twins. :
I figure have Proxima use fire since nothing can destroy faster than a wildfire untamed. Proxima being the more brash, egomaniaca,l wrathful, "How Dare You Defy Me?!!!" kind of queen, fire and brimstone seemed to be perfect for her.
Its in Portuguese but its really cool to see your characters in TIMM style.
I originally wanted to make them as like teens/children but they dont have that feature yet so I just made them as 17, 18 year olds. But in the story they are going to be like 15 or 16 years of age in appearance.
I hear you on that. I know what powers and somewhat of a backstory for my main hero, but not sure if to make him Meta human or mutant.
The backstory I have for him now is like he used to be a orphan due to both his birth parent dying when he was 6, but then someone finds him ten years later and makes him a heir to his family fortune. But since he never knew what any of his aunts, uncles or even caretakers are like, he's been pretty much distant when it comes to grand balls and things like that. Character wise he's shy, easily angered but hides it well with his humor. He also is a bit of a aggresor when it comes to beating down evil, or at least when it comes to ending a brawl quickly, he's the guy to go to beforehand. He's 5'7 but built like a linebacker for a football team. Attending a high school he "assumes" he's supposed to start things over with both his newfound family and his life as a pre-multi-millionaire. But that's the idea I have running in my head if he's a metahuman.
If I make him mutant he'll most definately be known as a underground walking battery sapper who can mask his powers with his attitude towards anyone around him. He was supposed to sneak into a mega-mall and drain the battery so his friends can go go inside and raid it for several hours, but one of the people he grew up with ratted him out to the police via payphone and caused him to get caught. Now he's forced to choose between trying to skip the state and start anew somewhere else, or do what his probation officer wants him to do, which is to "try and make something more of yourself instead of being a walking jumper cable."
Also I'm trying to find a website that'll let me make a hero a post a link somewhere. Unfortunately I don't know how to make a certain file or anything of the sort, so if anyone knows a way and have time to explain it to me or be able to draw him for free (don't trust online checks or online credit card [whatever they're called, like paypal] sites) I'll be very grateful. Also to those who can draw him I'll certainly try to find a way to repay you back, and that's my honest word (sorry for making this post long as hell).
I'm working on an origin. Still abit lost on the Powers and such. As well, I don't want to F up the back story by getting World History ncorrect.
Ask, NTel.... thats what this thread is for... lots of people here can help with different World History topics, help you keep your facts straight...
and Rayze... what do you mean "mutant or Meta-human?"....
thats a bit like saying "luthren or christian"
they arent mutually exclusive.
A meta- human is literal, its anyone with abilities beyond normal human possibility (i.e. batman/ironman are not meta-humans)
however, unlike "mutant", Meta-human discribes ANY method of granted powers (science experiment gone wrong, being an alien... that sort of thing)
your story has some obvious flaws at the moment... you have a Wayne complex right off the bat, but then you're adding in this story about how he was running around with "undesirables" robbing places....
the two dont mesh, and they're both cliche. pick one or the other... or make them unique somehow.
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ok, everyone's gonna have a character who's rediculously rich for no good reason ("Hero" is practically synonimous with "independant wealth")
so.... maybe scratch that idea.... its easily the weakest point of your ideas so far. Ivory towers, in general, suck nuts. (unless its a villain)
If hes going to be a basically normal human, with training and/or gadgets... figure out how/why he would become that way as an orphaned child, in foster homes growing up (were they good? bad? supportive? game him a hard knock lesson in "right and wrong"?)
if hes a mutant.... has that made it hard for him to feel "normal"? how did his parents die, does he blame himself/his abilities?.... has he tried to keep his powers hidden so people will think hes normal... has it worked?
Its easy to understand why a 6-10 year old with super powers would quickly become a gang member (evil or begnin).... a sense of family and belonging, a feeling of value, being able to bring something important and necessary to the group....
it works MUCH better if hes still a youth at the time.... 15 or younger...
think of it, perhapse... like a modern oliver twist...
but dont give him the perfect ending, with wealth and servents galore...
give him a real happy ending... a family that cares about him, and loves him for who he is as a person, and what he could become...
because thats whats important..... not money.
Well I think I finished the intro to my story but I might rewrite it cuz I just thought up a new way to tell it. I might post it so I can get some feedback and yall tell me which would work better..
looks like I got some rewriting to do. I really had no clue that I had to think about that kind of stuff when it comes to writing. I guess before I bring up another back story I need to think about some of the stuff if not most of the stuff you said in your post. Thanks alot.
no no... dont be discouraged....
never forget that many great characters had utterly silly "origins"
getting bit by a radioactive spider is just absurd.... but we roll with it, because, come on.. hes fricking spiderman.
Dont ever, EVER, feel like you "have to" meet some community standard on back stories... far from it... I simply assumed that posting your ideas up here was a request for aid... if it wasnt wanted, I do appologize.
it will ever remain YOUR characters backstory... if you could care less if its been done before (or even BECAUSE its been done before, as an homage {I know someone in COV who created a "SHAZAM" character based around the Cthulu mythos})
then tell us all to go hang, and write the back story YOU want...
...hell you can still ask for writing help ("Hey, I dont want to change the story at all, but Im not the best writer, could you help?")
it is ALWAYS entirely up to you.... I, WE, are here to help community members who want it, for ideas on how their character "came to be", on their life before hero work.... on just making the story they have sound cooler, more authentic, more "comic booky"... whatever.
dont ever feel like I, or anyone else helping her, am "shooting down" your character idea.... that really isnt my intent. :-/
no no... dont be discouraged....
never forget that many great characters had utterly silly "origins"
getting bit by a radioactive spider is just absurd.... but we roll with it, because, come on.. hes fricking spiderman.
Dont ever, EVER, feel like you "have to" meet some community standard on back stories... far from it... I simply assumed that posting your ideas up here was a request for aid... if it wasnt wanted, I do appologize.
it will ever remain YOUR characters backstory... if you could care less if its been done before (or even BECAUSE its been done before, as an homage {I know someone in COV who created a "SHAZAM" character based around the Cthulu mythos})
then tell us all to go hang, and write the back story YOU want...
...hell you can still ask for writing help ("Hey, I dont want to change the story at all, but Im not the best writer, could you help?")
it is ALWAYS entirely up to you.... I, WE, are here to help community members who want it, for ideas on how their character "came to be", on their life before hero work.... on just making the story they have sound cooler, more authentic, more "comic booky"... whatever.
dont ever feel like I, or anyone else helping her, am "shooting down" your character idea.... that really isnt my intent. :-/
No, it's cool. I usually do need some help when it comes to writing a backstory and thought since some have been already made, then if you find one you like take it and re-fit it to fit your character. Although I was wondering about the whole meta-human and mutant origins ( glad you cleared that up in a few lines ), but I guess if I really want to have a bit more "creativity" I should rethink on how he was growing up.
And I usually don't care if anyone is "shooting down" my idea. I know it may or may not need some work, or maybe just need to done over, but long story short a opinion matters no matter how "sacastic" you can be.
Any who, really don't have much for her yet aside from a rough and albeit crappy outline.
The thing about the robot is that she isn't quite a hero so much as inclined towards the helping of others to her capacity...which i guess that's all a hero does...but they do it in a more heroic sounding way...
Designed and engineered as a test bed for not only the integration of mechanic structures into the human being, but enhanced performance via genetic mutation to harmonize transference (mumbo jumbo for she's genetically engineered to be fully capable of integrating with computers because her brain has an alternate function that encodes signals in a format machines understand). As this was an illegal operation that was done by siphoning off money from corporate funding, the employees involved were arrested and put on trial. Not wanting the fact that anyone had gone so far as to manipulate the human gene and play god with another's life, the govt. found it suitable to keep everything hush and destroy all evidence, including the genetically engineered subject.
Knowing their failure, the employees decided to at least rescue the being spawned from their research. Prior to a trial, one of the employees managed to escape while the others made a diversion. The employee broke into evidence and stole the engineered subject, backing up all their research data onto her before setting her loose. The data being carried was put under a cipher so that the information couldn't fall into the wrong hands if they find out about the subject's abilities. Hence the name Cipher Alesco, alesco meaning "to grow up" in latin.
Cipher's only given command before release was to fabricate a life with which she could watch others and learn about people, while keeping low so no one may find her. This resulted in her being adopted and being raised by a family who were former friends of the now condemned employees. After learning a suitable amount from the family, she was allowed to join public school in order to observe and learn human habits from assumably normal people.
so.... is she a wetware Gynoid or a cyborg?
your discription is both vauge and confining, Mony....
shes a bit like Vici, so far... especially the adoption and prime directive to "fit in"....
I'd definately like to see some of River Tam show up in her character though....
You discribe her as a living hardpoint frame for cutting edge ideas involving bio-electonic integration....
but was it all just "functionality?"
that is to say... were they only testing the possibilities of making wetware work?
....or did the project have a particular goal? (in the hero world, this would include things like... mind controled weapons, super soldiers, cryptography, super spies.... etc)
see, if they have a goal (and a name like Cipher leads me to believe there was a goal)... then the engineers may have given her an overriding "current objective".... but her hard code, her functionality would have the capability, if not possibility to break loose of that override code (since she is not, strictly speaking, all machine...)
at first, this would be a dangerous outcome....
...but as time progressed, and the character began to aquire.... attachement, understanding, a desire to "belong".... as she aquired a conscience.......
this breaking of her override code would, infact, be the cause of her hero work.... to use her hardwired abilities to further her *personal* goals of "friends" or "family" or "community".... even at the risk of exposing herself.
to, in a sense... become selfless.
Selflessness is something inherant in a "Hero".... without selflessness, its impossible to be a hero. for most hero types, this is a mantle taken on, or born with...
for Cipher, it is something desired, learned, aquired.... something that she becomes, because she wants to (which, as you can imagine, is a pretty big concept for a living machine.)
Yeah, I'm aware that is a pretty vague description overall, it was the only thing I really have on hand though. >.<
The thing I was trying to address was, because I'm a stickler for hard science and making things at least making sense on a theoretical level, the fact that the biggest issue currently barring cybernetics is the inability to communicate with electronics on any detailed or meaningful level.
What we have thus far achieved is the ability to utilize electrochemical reactions, to jolt certain parts of a robotic device to make it react. Like with the cybernetic prosthesis we now have, the actual information being used to move the are are from sensors and electrochemical reactions given off in the muscles across out chest and back, not the original nerves to the arm.
What this really means is that we have managed to build a workaround to the cybernetic problem so far, but no real solution. The only current solution we have, biologically engineered "chips", are still quite a ways off from becoming a reality. The only other solution we have, re engineering the human body itself, is illegal. It also poses several problems in that we don't have enough expertise in engineering with the human body as well as the moral issues of tampering with another's life.
With Cipher, I intended her as a genetically and surgically engineered human that was literally modified to have additional "sub-brains" which were built to "think" the way a computer processes information. The computer parts would be both contemporary bio-chips as well as traditional electronics.
The bio-chips would be used to help translate information between the traditional brain and the sub-brains, which would then communicate with the traditional electronics to do whatever the given command was.
The only other mechanics built into Cipher's body would be a underlying surgical replacement of most of her organic parts that might be liable to deteriorate under the stress from both atrophy as well as the surgery being constantly done to her neural structure. this resulted in a replacement of most of her inner body, the bone structure being replaced with a more rigid and modular structure, titanium with an expanded copper core. This skeletal structure was also used as a rudimentary system to manage the other electronics in her body.
As far as her energy source, that is actually still based on the human way of gathering energy, but altered to work on a much wider spectrum and much smaller scale, as well as having alternative methods of energy generation. Having a core system that takes any incoming particles and breaking them down using short wave ionization to charge the particles and make them react, this is a somewhat inefficient as you have to have enough particles that can be forced to react to give off enough of a charge to counterbalance the energy it cost to start the reaction, and therefore backup way ot generating energy.
Her other methods of gathering energy would be solar via modified skin(which I have been debating if her skin got replaced for electro active polymers layered with engineered chlorophyll cells under a shock absorbent outer shell), transferred force (more or less the system used by the powered legs on the HULC from the Darpa program, the one that can run for 20 hours before recharge, obviously exaggerated in this case to be slightly more efficient and span across more of the body), and electromagnetic fields (in this case, the fact that all objects give off energy is used as the premise that although this won't be enough energy to power Cipher alone, it ensures that she will never just go off line and stay off line). Her battery system would be a mix of organic electrochemical as well as electric storage, allowing for transference of backup energy to any necessary part be it mechanical or organic in a moments notice. Her other source being a high density radioactive core is based on the principles drawn up about stars, being turned into a self contained solar reactor, though due to it's size and density is highly regulated and has a low power output. This makes the reactor last a long time but not efficient for high activity.
Her body really wasn't designed as a powerhouse or anything, really only averaging out to a normal person in terms of actual strength output and such, though she has great agility and almost limitless endurance.
Because of the electronics and the issue of safety, Cipher was also built with an energy discharge function for if any kind of electrical surge or experiment went awry. This allows her to transfer energy through her power systems and release it through multiple nodes across her body, which during experiments would all be connected to grounding wires.
Aside from the wireless access points built across the collar bone, there is a hardwire access point located at the base of her neck that can be connected to a universal hub that she keeps on her.
Aesthetically there were several options based solely on the creators preference, namely being the glowing bits, hair/eye color, and apparent gender. They actually utilized the glowing lines put in all around her body to test different parts of her mechanics, turning it into a system checker as well as an activity monitor. The neon blue hair and eyes were simply a style choice.
This whole thing, the intentions being to not only resolve the issues surrounding human to electronic communication, but to also evolve the human body into a integrated platform for both genetic and technological evolution, was done as a secret project as those involved had not only engineered, cloned, and surgically tampered with many individuals leading up to the creation of Cipher, but they also had completed Cipher, which pretty much stood for everything people viewed as right and wrong in terms of using technology and medical systems.
As such the company responsible was eliminated in a hostile takeover. Without any time to properly hide her or all the information they had worked on, those involved backed up all the research information and corporate information onto Cipher(putting all the information locked under a cipher >.>) and swap her quickly for a different non functioning model.
After those involved were captured Cipher and other models that were assumed to be junk were cataloged and shipped off to be destroyed, while the dummy got locked up. The last commands that Cipher was given was directly associated with survival and keeping the information safe until another group that was associated with the company could retrieve her. She was rescued then by the associated group by infiltrating the facility being used to destroy/incinerate the evidence, and once again swapping her out for a model that they had kept.
This part didn't go all that well either as those involved got caught as well, but not before spiriting Cipher off to a safe place with some of the members friends not associated with the project. Since no people directly associated with Cipher were around anymore, those that had her felt some responsibility to care for her while figuring out just what their now condemned or dead friends had left them.
EDIT: Er...yeah...that was long...
Any who, she's actually a design based on a much more complex bio-mechanical character I made before, but fount out that most people just didn't understand just what a bio-engineered networked nano-cell human interface was .
So, this design is more base on someone taking a human, genetically and surgically altering just about everything possible, and popping out something that straddles the defining line of man and machine, though far less of the line treading issue that I had hoped for prior.
EDIT2: Gonna link a few things to explain a few of my soft-sci theories and how they would affect this char later. Think the issue I'm having is that with as much technical information ad justification I can give, I don't quite understand the poetic side of stories...
be wary of your corporate knowlege too... this sentance stood out to me like a big neon sign:
"As such the company responsible was eliminated in a hostile takeover"
that doesnt even really make sense... Hostile takeovers occur when the "victim" has something the "attacker" wants... badly enough to persist on bidding for a company, after its board has refused to sell (even to the point of bully-buying up shares to get a controlling interest.)
its not a punishment for companies that others think are playing dirty.
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that being said, of course.... if someone WANTED Cipher and that project... it would give a lot of weight to future villains in her rogues gallery... it adds tension to her story, and a group of people actively LOOKING for her (rather than her creators just being paranoid)
just because the group that made her didnt necessarly have any weaponizing intent with her, others might very well have some...
you might want to take a look through some of the Champions organizations, and see if any of the villain-run ones strike you as the sort to want Cipher.
your lack of the "poetic", as you put it, is much more a fault of the author's desire to creat characters who have no understanding of the way "humans live"... its evident in your character in M-High... and this one, and then again your alien idea.
You like the idea that your character is set adrift in the world around them.. that they are clueless, and therefor must spend a good portion of their backstory standing around saying "Please, I not from your country?"
its a valid stance to make.... but you must take into account the implications of what your saying.
you've created a character who was human at some point... she was a body, was a brain.....
Shes like frankenstein's monster. she desires normalcy, reality.
but she cant get passed the "mental block" of it all....
imagine..... when you get that sense of writers block... you want to say things, you might even have ideas... but nothing comes out.
think about what that could feel like.... if you had "Life Block".. or "socialization block"...
the art of your character must like in the question "what makes us human". if you strip out our bones, our organs, hotwire our mind with micro chips so that its easier to talk to a machine than another human being.... if you take away everything that we use to define ourselves as human.... even our free will....
...are we still human...?
is there something undefinable, something intangable, that still feels, still needs, still wants.... something that cant be "uncoded" in us. does Cipher have that something. Underneith all her technology, her rigid bones, is she still a person.... or is she now just a machine?
whether its a beating muscle or a tiny irradiating sun..... does she still have a heart?
is she still creative, inspired.. does she still dream?
very much like a machine... right now, all your dealing with is facts, her bones, her skin, her muscles, her eyes, her hair...
your background so far, has everything to do with "what" she is......
nothing at all about "who" she is.
Comic books have always been about "who" we are.....and thats where your story, your "poetry", lies.
The hostile takeover was referencing the Govt. shutting down the company, couldn't think of another way of saying they sent cops/swat in to arrest everyone and confiscate everything.
Never really thought of that habit. o.0 Granted looking at my other characters, the only one I've made recently that was human is a normal guy with MacGyver skills at using magic tricks...
Hum...
Advanced Concepts Industries, ARGENT, COIL, Bastion Alpha Security, *****ss Industries, Executive Control Solutions, Harmon Industries, Institute for Human Advancement
Cybermind, Fiacho, Halfjack, Mechanon, Stone, Franklin, Teleios, Warlord, the
Went down a list and those were the guys that sounded like they would be interested, there were a few other villains with suits and some heroes who looked like they would take interest too, but don't know if they're all ready chasing after something.
In and of herself since she wasn't designed to fight really, her most offensive abilities would be to cause an electric discharge or hack an oponents electronics if available, so the whole survival thing might just boil down to in general trying to avoid conflict.
Also tried limiting her capacity in the sense of although her ower sources run for indefinite periods, they are low output, so anything that taxes her energy supply forces her to shutdown and recouperate, which kinda means fainting might be an issue with her. How that was associated I don't know, just wanted to clarify why I chucked that much up about her power core.
Who she is....uh...Good question!...er...
Her actual personality I'm not really sure about, Vici, River, and Melfina (who I kinda based some of Cipher's looks on) all have a somewhat literal way of interpreting things, granted River and Mel both show deeper thinking at times with the things they say, River more so.
I would probably say, since it's a running them that does make sense in terms of having academic knowledge without human experience, that even though Cipher may feel, she is entirely unused to the concept, which makes moments where she does feel strongly rather confusing. Though the desire to emulate feelings as well as actually explore her real feelings would arise from her trying to fit in, which might actually be interesting to see how her fake displays of emotions when something doesn't really interest her or confuses her clash with her actual displays of emotion.
I would also assume that she would be coming from a more obedient kind of mentality from the research projects, becoming more independent as necessity facilitates as well as her human nature kicking in.
Think the main progression with her is going to be how her trained mechanic and obedient nature conflicts with her growing latent human nature as well as her directives.
Ha, well...this is awkward...apparently I unintentionally lied by saying I'd be back when I did, but this time it's for sure, I've just been lazy and have been reading a bunch of comics so I haven't really checked in since my last post. My apologies. hehe
I have noticed quite a few threads asking for help, lately....
So I wanted to revive this thread. There are many people in the community willing to help, and it might cut back on clutter a little if we post all the "Requests" in one place...
He was created with Superman and Captain America in mind, however, I do not want to go anywhere near there origins. I do however would like him to have served in the WWII and the Cold War
NEED HELP!!!!
Edit: (maybe adding powers in there)
His powers I energy based.
Super Strength
Fly
Speed
Energy Blast
Invul.
He was created with Superman and Captain America in mind, however, I do not want to go anywhere near there origins. I do however would like him to have served in the WWII and the Cold War
NEED HELP!!!!
Edit: (maybe adding powers in there)
His powers I energy based.
Super Strength
Fly
Speed
Energy Blast
Invul.
1. Magical - Captain Sentry finds a magical amulet of Saint Germain that gives him his powers and keeps his age constant.
2. Mythical - Captain Sentry was imbued with powers by the ancient Roman goddess of justice Lustitia.
3. Mechanical - Captain Sentry is an advanced robot created by Howard Hughes and other top scientist to fight fascist enemies of the state.
4. Alien - Captain Sentry is an alien sent to earth as the first wave of an attack on the Earth. Captain Sentry turns against his commanders when he finds his own humanity among the people of earth.
5. Mutation - Captain Sentry was born as a tiny wrinkled 100 year old man. He ages backwards becoming younger as the years go by. His strange birth also seems to bestow him with unusual powers.
6. Induced Mutation - Captain Sentry was effected by the mysterious Compound X while defending a government science lab from nazi spies.
7. Super Science - Captain Sentry is a time traveler from the future who periodically defends the past from his nemesis, a future version of himself bent on destroying the past that created him!
2. Mythical - Captain Sentry was imbued with powers by the ancient Roman goddess of justice Lustitia.
4. Alien - Captain Sentry is an alien sent to earth as the first wave of an attack on the Earth. Captain Sentry turns against his commanders when he finds his own humanity among the people of earth.
7. Super Science - Captain Sentry is a time traveler from the future who periodically defends the past from his nemesis, a future version of himself bent on destroying the past that created him![/QUOTE]
Thank you Ghoul. Definitely got my mind turning. Love these 3 ideas. Going to play around with them.
would be that the Cap earned his stripes aiding the french resistance. Standing guard one night, he defended a safe house full of expatriot german scientists and french civilians single handedly against a science/occult paramilitary unit from Nazi.
in a last ditch attempt to gain access to the refugees, one german soldier fired off an experimental weapon. Unfortunately it had been deliberately boobytrapped by the runaway german scientists(whose recovery was the purpose of the attack)
the blast hit Cap square in the chest throwing him back fully through the building. Then, the weapon exploded, leaving a crater where the soldier had been.
The germans retreat, and the french resistance shows up to evacuate the refugees.
Rather than being hurt by the blast, Cap seems remarkably well, healthier, more fit (he used to need glasses)
he becomes something of a mascot to his unit and american armed forces in general. He never tired, he always one.. he was the guardian of justice and freedom...
He was Captain Sentinel.
throughout the war Captain Sentinel wasnt always on the front lines, but if he was there, the Allies won, or held the line.
When the war ended, the Axis collaps created a technological and occult diffusion, with petty dictators and generic criminals gaining access to terrible weapons both scientific and mystic. Captain Sentinel made it a personal mission to bring these people to justice.
He put his uniform on again, and fought in Korea. He fought constantly with MacArthur and held the line against the PLA while Allied forces retreated from the Yalu River.
Around the time of MacArthur's dissmissal, millitary officals began to realize that the Captain's health and endurance were far beyond normal levels, and after 5 years and countless engagements, he hadnt aged in any way.
As part of a new branch of the government, russian and german scientists studied the Captain in a secret lab in the new mexico desert.
It was there he discovered he could manipulate energy, and lead to Cap's greatest shame.
Through studying Cap's abilities, scientists were able to turn the fission bomb, into the exponentially more powerful Fusion Bomb.
Feeling slightly betrayed, Captain Sentinel left the military and began fighting injustice whereever he saw it.... However when Viet Nam flared up, he couldnt stop himself from protecting his fellow soldiers from harm in the jungles. He did what he could, but primarily he protected small villages and towns from unchecked aggression from either side. His noteriety among the civilian populous back in the states grew to astronomical proportions as the dubious nature of that police action came out, and his neutral actions to protect innocent life came to light.
After Vietnam, Captain Sentinel dedicated himself wholly to the selfless defense of innocence and freedom, whereever he was needed.
for 30 years he stood as an unquestioned leader in the fight against crime and injustice, alongside many notable heroes.
since that time, and the rise of Antimatter, Cap has dedicated himself to the elimination of nuclear weapons, and the abuses of technology in the world.
I figure that antimatter's story would be a mirror...
being the german soldier who accidently got caught in the backlash of the exploding weapon.... at first he was blasted into pure energy, and it took him years to re-constitute himself....
beliving he'd come back from the dead as a god (and with powers to match) he became instrumental in places like spain and south america where facism still held sway...
using his ability to destroy matter, he set himself up as warlord on the largest caribbean island durring the turmoil of the early 1940s, and by '44 became the shadow ruler of the country.
That is, until the united states interfered. In 1959, US backing aided the revolution of Fidel Castro, ousting the former ruler, and his shadowy master.
Antimatter would have struck down Cuba's new leader, being a member of a "communist movement", but he saw the potential of the man, and shared his hatred of the US.
they became wary allies through the 60s and 70s. Durring this time, Antimatter begain his research into Nuclear weaponry. in the early 80's and into the 90s, antimatter began a subtle campaign in the Islands, gaining followers and consolidating power. With the fall of the Soviet Union in 1991, Cuba's economy crashed, and Antimatter took the oprotunity to secretly purchase much of the island. In 1992, he helped fund Doctor Destoryer's bid and American distruction (being a fellow german, afterall)
The Doctor's successes and failures became a model for Antimatter, and throughout the 90's he began his bid to conquer the US.
In 2004, he attempted to put his plan in motion, only to be stopped by the man who had, incidently, given Antimatter his powers.
Amazed that there was another being as powerful as he was, Antimatter felt compelled to destroy his "brother"
The battle that ensued on the outskirts of Vibora Bay (somewhere between the panhandle and new orleans, by its discription) left Antimatter too weak to keep his molecular structure together, the resulting seperation caused an explosion of near-nuclear proportions. it was only by shear luck on the Captain's part that no civilians were caught in the blast.
It appeared that Antimatter died in the explosion, but reciently his followers, many beliving fanatically in his godhood have been seen throughout the carabbean islands and central america, and it is likely that he has found a way to reconstitute himself again.
Beyond his normal energy powers, I could see him having a radiation-based pbAOE aura that debuffs his opponants, and the ability to explode in a massive explosion, and reconstitute himself at a later date (sooner if he does it on purpose, much longer if he was at his last breath)
At the present time, its unknown whether Antimatter CAN be killed.....
hey i could use a tad bit of help with my hero's origin myself, ok his name is voltrode and in essence hes an electric scrapper, think charging up his fists with electricity and being able to shoot it all that jazz, he can fly he can take a beating basically all generic super hero stuff strength faster than average great stamina, but like i said his main power is electricity.
anyway i was wondering how he could have gotten his powers, i was tying with the idea of him working as a security guard at some lab and accidently walking in on an experiment boom blast has electric powers and can do super human feats, but what would be the best way to do that? also what would his goal be for fighting crime?
also his arch nemesis being a t1000 clone lol but i have no idea how to pull that off lol
What would be your goal for fighting crime? Could be Revenge (Batman), Glory (Booster Gold), Money (Luke Cage), Penance (Spiderman), Patriotism (Captain America) and on and on. There are as many reasons to fight crime as there are to be a rock star.
What conflict in his past drives the hero towards this goal? What happened pre-origin to your character that drives him towards his goal? How does being a superhero help him achieve his goal.
How is your T1000 villain directly involved in that conflict? What is T1000’s desire? How does your villain’s desire create conflict with your heroes desire? Doctor Doom doesn’t do things because he’s “evil”. Doom’s pride makes his conflict with the world. He thinks he knows best and rule under him would be best for the world. ALL GOOD VILLAINS SHOULD THINK THEY ARE THE HEROES.
A good origin (or good story for that matter) is all about conflict. It's about personal desires and the obstacles that stand in the way of that desire.
You might say that Peter Parker becomes Spiderman when he's bitten by a radioactive spider. I would say that he becomes Spiderman when he realizes he is responsible for Uncle Ben's death. If Peter Parker never had super powers, I bet he would still find someway to fight crime, don’t you? It's Spiderman's desire to "make up" for his uncle's death that drives him.
If you’re still having trouble, reach inside yourself. What do you want? What do you wish you could change? Who or what is standing in the ways of your goals and desires? Is it an evil boss? Parent you can’t live up to? The girl who doesn’t notice you? Is it someone that puts it’s own desire ahead of your own? Someone who doesn’t share your ideology? We all experience conflict; stories are just a way to share those ideas with others.
excellent help ghoul, im actually in the midst of writing a back story with your advice in mind, if i deem it good enough ill post it on the forums to see what other people think
Hey, I was wondering if you could critique my origin/background for Misanthrope. He's a severely updated version of a character created when I was six, having, basically, only slight similarities in powers and origin to him. Thanks!
A lot of great talent in these boards no doubt. I was reading through Poseidon's animal/insect name thread and one simple little name that Ghoul mentioned, The Cockroach, got me thinking of a bizzare street level vigilante.
His story starts with him very very young waking up in the basement of an abandoned building that is engulfed in cockroaches. The boy studies the insects and finds that they are great survivors and wants to be the best survivor to ever exsist. He travels the world subjecting himself to very rigerous and painful survival experiments and learns martial arts. And just to be different he LOVES to use nun-chucks.
Later he develops a damage resistant/bullet proof exoskeleton and super sensitive antenaes and takes to the streets fighting crime.
Right now his only reason for fighting crime is to test his survivability which is a pretty neat twist imo. I could use some help fleshing out his backstory and details on how he ended up in the abandoned building and how he managed to create the suit and antenaes. Thanks for anyone's help in advance!!!
I really like what you have so far! If you don’t mind let me bounce a couple ideas off of you.
How about the hero being born slightly odd looking (maybe he an albino?) and placed in abusive foster care? He’s locked for weeks at a time in the basement. A horrible place covered in trash and roaches. From there he realizes what great survivors they are. He decides he is a survivor as well and escapes after years of neglect and torture. Living in old abandoned buildings and surviving much like the bugs he admires. He meets an old hobo and ex-villain “Vespertine”, who takes pity on him and teaches him to read and write, physics, mathematics as well as the prison martial art “52 Blocks”. Together they carve out an existence in the dark corners of the city finding warmth and friendship in each other.
One day his mentor and adopted father is killed by hired thugs defending the condemned building The Cockroach and other transients call home. The thugs work for a corrupt and twisted development corporation bent on transforming the slums of the city into a shining example of modern living.
The Cockroach decides to fight back against the evil corporation, building a low-tech armor and weapons while using the skills taught to him by his mentor to make the city safe for the other outcasts, homeless, and bums in the city. He's the hero you can't seem to kill... The Cockroach!
Now THAT'S a backstory!! I love it Ghoul I really do. I tend to use the old mentor with a lot of my characters and I like the way you integrated it into Roaches story. I like the idea of them running around taking down drug dealers and using dealers' money to survive. Using the dangers of the streets to their advantage. I also like the evil corporation; another thing I use a lot. Sounds like I'm gonna use that corporation but have their plans turn out to be even more dark and sinister. Thanks Ghoul now I really wanna develop this character further. Ooh another idea. Instead of his mentor being killed, I think it would be neat to have him be recruited by the evil corp. and he just can't resist as he sees this as his chance for redemption. His greed takes over him and he abandons Roach to the streets. Betrayal is a theme I want to use with Roach.
Comments
Well they arent like able to destroy the entire universe but I mean imagine if two stars approximately the size of the Sun decided to come to our Solar System and just hover over Earth. It'd kill everything in its path. Thats why they send avatars. Not nearly as powerful but not nearly as dangerous to the planet either.
that is to say, you turned A&B back into Super Good Guys, and Proxima back into Selfish and Evil...
Take out the part where A&B are "offended" that their Matron is stealing up the energy of planets to try and sustain herself...
Rather, leave it at the point where "A&B realize their mother is weakening, and see an oprotunity to usurp her. Joining their energies together, they are able to match her in strength, and in the end take all but the dregs of her former power"
I like this stance, because it is rather original in the super hero genere.... in that, the Centari are not "good guy and bad guy".... they're embroiled in their own damned thing... interested only in reclaiming their former might (Proxima), or keeping their current power (A&B)
it is the AVATARS themselves.... who eventually become hero and villain... that they transend their "orders" and become more noble, and more villainous than their creators. they, in a sense, aquire Souls of their own... and one day may even choose to fight to protect Earth for its own rights, rather than simply because A&B told them too... (well after Proxima's Chosen has been destroyed and A&B back home have rubbed her nose in it laughing and putting ice down the back of her shirt.)
For the avatars, I was going to make Al a boy and Beta a girl. Proxima's agent is going to be a woman. I think making the agent a woman will make her more cunning and able to use her beauty to manipulate the men in power to do her bidding. Plus there is nothing worse than getting beat up by a chick.
I made a picture of Al using this Portuguese Hero Maker. Its really cool, looks like Timm style a bit.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v319/Kento_Jade/Proxima.png
And here is Beta Centari. I figure I'd let Al be the more flamboyant , hot-headed, fire-on-all cylinders kind of character while Beta would be the level-headed, nobler, classic brick of the twins. :
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v319/Kento_Jade/BetaCentari.png
I figure have Proxima use fire since nothing can destroy faster than a wildfire untamed. Proxima being the more brash, egomaniaca,l wrathful, "How Dare You Defy Me?!!!" kind of queen, fire and brimstone seemed to be perfect for her.
where did you find that hero creator, it looks pretty cool (and it is TIMM)
Its in Portuguese but its really cool to see your characters in TIMM style.
I originally wanted to make them as like teens/children but they dont have that feature yet so I just made them as 17, 18 year olds. But in the story they are going to be like 15 or 16 years of age in appearance.
http://www.ugo.com/channels/comics/heromachine2/heroMachine2.asp
I'm working on an origin. Still abit lost on the Powers and such. As well, I don't want to F up the back story by getting World History ncorrect.
The backstory I have for him now is like he used to be a orphan due to both his birth parent dying when he was 6, but then someone finds him ten years later and makes him a heir to his family fortune. But since he never knew what any of his aunts, uncles or even caretakers are like, he's been pretty much distant when it comes to grand balls and things like that. Character wise he's shy, easily angered but hides it well with his humor. He also is a bit of a aggresor when it comes to beating down evil, or at least when it comes to ending a brawl quickly, he's the guy to go to beforehand. He's 5'7 but built like a linebacker for a football team. Attending a high school he "assumes" he's supposed to start things over with both his newfound family and his life as a pre-multi-millionaire. But that's the idea I have running in my head if he's a metahuman.
If I make him mutant he'll most definately be known as a underground walking battery sapper who can mask his powers with his attitude towards anyone around him. He was supposed to sneak into a mega-mall and drain the battery so his friends can go go inside and raid it for several hours, but one of the people he grew up with ratted him out to the police via payphone and caused him to get caught. Now he's forced to choose between trying to skip the state and start anew somewhere else, or do what his probation officer wants him to do, which is to "try and make something more of yourself instead of being a walking jumper cable."
Also I'm trying to find a website that'll let me make a hero a post a link somewhere. Unfortunately I don't know how to make a certain file or anything of the sort, so if anyone knows a way and have time to explain it to me or be able to draw him for free (don't trust online checks or online credit card [whatever they're called, like paypal] sites) I'll be very grateful. Also to those who can draw him I'll certainly try to find a way to repay you back, and that's my honest word (sorry for making this post long as hell).
Ask, NTel.... thats what this thread is for... lots of people here can help with different World History topics, help you keep your facts straight...
and Rayze... what do you mean "mutant or Meta-human?"....
thats a bit like saying "luthren or christian"
they arent mutually exclusive.
A meta- human is literal, its anyone with abilities beyond normal human possibility (i.e. batman/ironman are not meta-humans)
however, unlike "mutant", Meta-human discribes ANY method of granted powers (science experiment gone wrong, being an alien... that sort of thing)
your story has some obvious flaws at the moment... you have a Wayne complex right off the bat, but then you're adding in this story about how he was running around with "undesirables" robbing places....
the two dont mesh, and they're both cliche. pick one or the other... or make them unique somehow.
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ok, everyone's gonna have a character who's rediculously rich for no good reason ("Hero" is practically synonimous with "independant wealth")
so.... maybe scratch that idea.... its easily the weakest point of your ideas so far. Ivory towers, in general, suck nuts. (unless its a villain)
If hes going to be a basically normal human, with training and/or gadgets... figure out how/why he would become that way as an orphaned child, in foster homes growing up (were they good? bad? supportive? game him a hard knock lesson in "right and wrong"?)
if hes a mutant.... has that made it hard for him to feel "normal"? how did his parents die, does he blame himself/his abilities?.... has he tried to keep his powers hidden so people will think hes normal... has it worked?
Its easy to understand why a 6-10 year old with super powers would quickly become a gang member (evil or begnin).... a sense of family and belonging, a feeling of value, being able to bring something important and necessary to the group....
it works MUCH better if hes still a youth at the time.... 15 or younger...
think of it, perhapse... like a modern oliver twist...
but dont give him the perfect ending, with wealth and servents galore...
give him a real happy ending... a family that cares about him, and loves him for who he is as a person, and what he could become...
because thats whats important..... not money.
never forget that many great characters had utterly silly "origins"
getting bit by a radioactive spider is just absurd.... but we roll with it, because, come on.. hes fricking spiderman.
Dont ever, EVER, feel like you "have to" meet some community standard on back stories... far from it... I simply assumed that posting your ideas up here was a request for aid... if it wasnt wanted, I do appologize.
it will ever remain YOUR characters backstory... if you could care less if its been done before (or even BECAUSE its been done before, as an homage {I know someone in COV who created a "SHAZAM" character based around the Cthulu mythos})
then tell us all to go hang, and write the back story YOU want...
...hell you can still ask for writing help ("Hey, I dont want to change the story at all, but Im not the best writer, could you help?")
it is ALWAYS entirely up to you.... I, WE, are here to help community members who want it, for ideas on how their character "came to be", on their life before hero work.... on just making the story they have sound cooler, more authentic, more "comic booky"... whatever.
dont ever feel like I, or anyone else helping her, am "shooting down" your character idea.... that really isnt my intent. :-/
EDIT: Three characters actually, a robot, an alien, and a mage-type guy...two mage-type guys...four?
...Think I'll just start with advice on my robot...if that's ok?
No, it's cool. I usually do need some help when it comes to writing a backstory and thought since some have been already made, then if you find one you like take it and re-fit it to fit your character. Although I was wondering about the whole meta-human and mutant origins ( glad you cleared that up in a few lines ), but I guess if I really want to have a bit more "creativity" I should rethink on how he was growing up.
And I usually don't care if anyone is "shooting down" my idea. I know it may or may not need some work, or maybe just need to done over, but long story short a opinion matters no matter how "sacastic" you can be.
Any who, really don't have much for her yet aside from a rough and albeit crappy outline.
The thing about the robot is that she isn't quite a hero so much as inclined towards the helping of others to her capacity...which i guess that's all a hero does...but they do it in a more heroic sounding way...
Designed and engineered as a test bed for not only the integration of mechanic structures into the human being, but enhanced performance via genetic mutation to harmonize transference (mumbo jumbo for she's genetically engineered to be fully capable of integrating with computers because her brain has an alternate function that encodes signals in a format machines understand). As this was an illegal operation that was done by siphoning off money from corporate funding, the employees involved were arrested and put on trial. Not wanting the fact that anyone had gone so far as to manipulate the human gene and play god with another's life, the govt. found it suitable to keep everything hush and destroy all evidence, including the genetically engineered subject.
Knowing their failure, the employees decided to at least rescue the being spawned from their research. Prior to a trial, one of the employees managed to escape while the others made a diversion. The employee broke into evidence and stole the engineered subject, backing up all their research data onto her before setting her loose. The data being carried was put under a cipher so that the information couldn't fall into the wrong hands if they find out about the subject's abilities. Hence the name Cipher Alesco, alesco meaning "to grow up" in latin.
Cipher's only given command before release was to fabricate a life with which she could watch others and learn about people, while keeping low so no one may find her. This resulted in her being adopted and being raised by a family who were former friends of the now condemned employees. After learning a suitable amount from the family, she was allowed to join public school in order to observe and learn human habits from assumably normal people.
your discription is both vauge and confining, Mony....
shes a bit like Vici, so far... especially the adoption and prime directive to "fit in"....
I'd definately like to see some of River Tam show up in her character though....
You discribe her as a living hardpoint frame for cutting edge ideas involving bio-electonic integration....
but was it all just "functionality?"
that is to say... were they only testing the possibilities of making wetware work?
....or did the project have a particular goal? (in the hero world, this would include things like... mind controled weapons, super soldiers, cryptography, super spies.... etc)
see, if they have a goal (and a name like Cipher leads me to believe there was a goal)... then the engineers may have given her an overriding "current objective".... but her hard code, her functionality would have the capability, if not possibility to break loose of that override code (since she is not, strictly speaking, all machine...)
at first, this would be a dangerous outcome....
...but as time progressed, and the character began to aquire.... attachement, understanding, a desire to "belong".... as she aquired a conscience.......
this breaking of her override code would, infact, be the cause of her hero work.... to use her hardwired abilities to further her *personal* goals of "friends" or "family" or "community".... even at the risk of exposing herself.
to, in a sense... become selfless.
Selflessness is something inherant in a "Hero".... without selflessness, its impossible to be a hero. for most hero types, this is a mantle taken on, or born with...
for Cipher, it is something desired, learned, aquired.... something that she becomes, because she wants to (which, as you can imagine, is a pretty big concept for a living machine.)
The thing I was trying to address was, because I'm a stickler for hard science and making things at least making sense on a theoretical level, the fact that the biggest issue currently barring cybernetics is the inability to communicate with electronics on any detailed or meaningful level.
What we have thus far achieved is the ability to utilize electrochemical reactions, to jolt certain parts of a robotic device to make it react. Like with the cybernetic prosthesis we now have, the actual information being used to move the are are from sensors and electrochemical reactions given off in the muscles across out chest and back, not the original nerves to the arm.
What this really means is that we have managed to build a workaround to the cybernetic problem so far, but no real solution. The only current solution we have, biologically engineered "chips", are still quite a ways off from becoming a reality. The only other solution we have, re engineering the human body itself, is illegal. It also poses several problems in that we don't have enough expertise in engineering with the human body as well as the moral issues of tampering with another's life.
With Cipher, I intended her as a genetically and surgically engineered human that was literally modified to have additional "sub-brains" which were built to "think" the way a computer processes information. The computer parts would be both contemporary bio-chips as well as traditional electronics.
The bio-chips would be used to help translate information between the traditional brain and the sub-brains, which would then communicate with the traditional electronics to do whatever the given command was.
The only other mechanics built into Cipher's body would be a underlying surgical replacement of most of her organic parts that might be liable to deteriorate under the stress from both atrophy as well as the surgery being constantly done to her neural structure. this resulted in a replacement of most of her inner body, the bone structure being replaced with a more rigid and modular structure, titanium with an expanded copper core. This skeletal structure was also used as a rudimentary system to manage the other electronics in her body.
As far as her energy source, that is actually still based on the human way of gathering energy, but altered to work on a much wider spectrum and much smaller scale, as well as having alternative methods of energy generation. Having a core system that takes any incoming particles and breaking them down using short wave ionization to charge the particles and make them react, this is a somewhat inefficient as you have to have enough particles that can be forced to react to give off enough of a charge to counterbalance the energy it cost to start the reaction, and therefore backup way ot generating energy.
Her other methods of gathering energy would be solar via modified skin(which I have been debating if her skin got replaced for electro active polymers layered with engineered chlorophyll cells under a shock absorbent outer shell), transferred force (more or less the system used by the powered legs on the HULC from the Darpa program, the one that can run for 20 hours before recharge, obviously exaggerated in this case to be slightly more efficient and span across more of the body), and electromagnetic fields (in this case, the fact that all objects give off energy is used as the premise that although this won't be enough energy to power Cipher alone, it ensures that she will never just go off line and stay off line). Her battery system would be a mix of organic electrochemical as well as electric storage, allowing for transference of backup energy to any necessary part be it mechanical or organic in a moments notice. Her other source being a high density radioactive core is based on the principles drawn up about stars, being turned into a self contained solar reactor, though due to it's size and density is highly regulated and has a low power output. This makes the reactor last a long time but not efficient for high activity.
Her body really wasn't designed as a powerhouse or anything, really only averaging out to a normal person in terms of actual strength output and such, though she has great agility and almost limitless endurance.
Because of the electronics and the issue of safety, Cipher was also built with an energy discharge function for if any kind of electrical surge or experiment went awry. This allows her to transfer energy through her power systems and release it through multiple nodes across her body, which during experiments would all be connected to grounding wires.
Aside from the wireless access points built across the collar bone, there is a hardwire access point located at the base of her neck that can be connected to a universal hub that she keeps on her.
Aesthetically there were several options based solely on the creators preference, namely being the glowing bits, hair/eye color, and apparent gender. They actually utilized the glowing lines put in all around her body to test different parts of her mechanics, turning it into a system checker as well as an activity monitor. The neon blue hair and eyes were simply a style choice.
This whole thing, the intentions being to not only resolve the issues surrounding human to electronic communication, but to also evolve the human body into a integrated platform for both genetic and technological evolution, was done as a secret project as those involved had not only engineered, cloned, and surgically tampered with many individuals leading up to the creation of Cipher, but they also had completed Cipher, which pretty much stood for everything people viewed as right and wrong in terms of using technology and medical systems.
As such the company responsible was eliminated in a hostile takeover. Without any time to properly hide her or all the information they had worked on, those involved backed up all the research information and corporate information onto Cipher(putting all the information locked under a cipher >.>) and swap her quickly for a different non functioning model.
After those involved were captured Cipher and other models that were assumed to be junk were cataloged and shipped off to be destroyed, while the dummy got locked up. The last commands that Cipher was given was directly associated with survival and keeping the information safe until another group that was associated with the company could retrieve her. She was rescued then by the associated group by infiltrating the facility being used to destroy/incinerate the evidence, and once again swapping her out for a model that they had kept.
This part didn't go all that well either as those involved got caught as well, but not before spiriting Cipher off to a safe place with some of the members friends not associated with the project. Since no people directly associated with Cipher were around anymore, those that had her felt some responsibility to care for her while figuring out just what their now condemned or dead friends had left them.
EDIT: Er...yeah...that was long...
Any who, she's actually a design based on a much more complex bio-mechanical character I made before, but fount out that most people just didn't understand just what a bio-engineered networked nano-cell human interface was .
So, this design is more base on someone taking a human, genetically and surgically altering just about everything possible, and popping out something that straddles the defining line of man and machine, though far less of the line treading issue that I had hoped for prior.
EDIT2: Gonna link a few things to explain a few of my soft-sci theories and how they would affect this char later. Think the issue I'm having is that with as much technical information ad justification I can give, I don't quite understand the poetic side of stories...
"As such the company responsible was eliminated in a hostile takeover"
that doesnt even really make sense... Hostile takeovers occur when the "victim" has something the "attacker" wants... badly enough to persist on bidding for a company, after its board has refused to sell (even to the point of bully-buying up shares to get a controlling interest.)
its not a punishment for companies that others think are playing dirty.
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that being said, of course.... if someone WANTED Cipher and that project... it would give a lot of weight to future villains in her rogues gallery... it adds tension to her story, and a group of people actively LOOKING for her (rather than her creators just being paranoid)
just because the group that made her didnt necessarly have any weaponizing intent with her, others might very well have some...
you might want to take a look through some of the Champions organizations, and see if any of the villain-run ones strike you as the sort to want Cipher.
your lack of the "poetic", as you put it, is much more a fault of the author's desire to creat characters who have no understanding of the way "humans live"... its evident in your character in M-High... and this one, and then again your alien idea.
You like the idea that your character is set adrift in the world around them.. that they are clueless, and therefor must spend a good portion of their backstory standing around saying "Please, I not from your country?"
its a valid stance to make.... but you must take into account the implications of what your saying.
you've created a character who was human at some point... she was a body, was a brain.....
Shes like frankenstein's monster. she desires normalcy, reality.
but she cant get passed the "mental block" of it all....
imagine..... when you get that sense of writers block... you want to say things, you might even have ideas... but nothing comes out.
think about what that could feel like.... if you had "Life Block".. or "socialization block"...
the art of your character must like in the question "what makes us human". if you strip out our bones, our organs, hotwire our mind with micro chips so that its easier to talk to a machine than another human being.... if you take away everything that we use to define ourselves as human.... even our free will....
...are we still human...?
is there something undefinable, something intangable, that still feels, still needs, still wants.... something that cant be "uncoded" in us.
does Cipher have that something. Underneith all her technology, her rigid bones, is she still a person.... or is she now just a machine?
whether its a beating muscle or a tiny irradiating sun..... does she still have a heart?
is she still creative, inspired.. does she still dream?
very much like a machine... right now, all your dealing with is facts, her bones, her skin, her muscles, her eyes, her hair...
your background so far, has everything to do with "what" she is......
nothing at all about "who" she is.
Comic books have always been about "who" we are.....and thats where your story, your "poetry", lies.
Never really thought of that habit. o.0 Granted looking at my other characters, the only one I've made recently that was human is a normal guy with MacGyver skills at using magic tricks...
Hum...
Advanced Concepts Industries, ARGENT, COIL, Bastion Alpha Security, *****ss Industries, Executive Control Solutions, Harmon Industries, Institute for Human Advancement
Cybermind, Fiacho, Halfjack, Mechanon, Stone, Franklin, Teleios, Warlord, the
Went down a list and those were the guys that sounded like they would be interested, there were a few other villains with suits and some heroes who looked like they would take interest too, but don't know if they're all ready chasing after something.
In and of herself since she wasn't designed to fight really, her most offensive abilities would be to cause an electric discharge or hack an oponents electronics if available, so the whole survival thing might just boil down to in general trying to avoid conflict.
Also tried limiting her capacity in the sense of although her ower sources run for indefinite periods, they are low output, so anything that taxes her energy supply forces her to shutdown and recouperate, which kinda means fainting might be an issue with her. How that was associated I don't know, just wanted to clarify why I chucked that much up about her power core.
Who she is....uh...Good question!...er...
Her actual personality I'm not really sure about, Vici, River, and Melfina (who I kinda based some of Cipher's looks on) all have a somewhat literal way of interpreting things, granted River and Mel both show deeper thinking at times with the things they say, River more so.
I would probably say, since it's a running them that does make sense in terms of having academic knowledge without human experience, that even though Cipher may feel, she is entirely unused to the concept, which makes moments where she does feel strongly rather confusing. Though the desire to emulate feelings as well as actually explore her real feelings would arise from her trying to fit in, which might actually be interesting to see how her fake displays of emotions when something doesn't really interest her or confuses her clash with her actual displays of emotion.
I would also assume that she would be coming from a more obedient kind of mentality from the research projects, becoming more independent as necessity facilitates as well as her human nature kicking in.
Think the main progression with her is going to be how her trained mechanic and obedient nature conflicts with her growing latent human nature as well as her directives.
Now that I'm in the swing of things though, I'll be available to throw some opinions in again.
and again, no need to "ask" guys, if you have a question, or want some help, just post it straight up.
we're here to help.
Aw, I thought we were here to be critical and snobbish.
So I wanted to revive this thread. There are many people in the community willing to help, and it might cut back on clutter a little if we post all the "Requests" in one place...
Here is a picture of him I have in my mind.. Captain Sentinel
He was created with Superman and Captain America in mind, however, I do not want to go anywhere near there origins. I do however would like him to have served in the WWII and the Cold War
NEED HELP!!!!
Edit: (maybe adding powers in there)
His powers I energy based.
Super Strength
Fly
Speed
Energy Blast
Invul.
Working for me. Looks like a general Superman/Cap hybrid. The strength of this one will be in the backstory.
1. Magical - Captain Sentry finds a magical amulet of Saint Germain that gives him his powers and keeps his age constant.
2. Mythical - Captain Sentry was imbued with powers by the ancient Roman goddess of justice Lustitia.
3. Mechanical - Captain Sentry is an advanced robot created by Howard Hughes and other top scientist to fight fascist enemies of the state.
4. Alien - Captain Sentry is an alien sent to earth as the first wave of an attack on the Earth. Captain Sentry turns against his commanders when he finds his own humanity among the people of earth.
5. Mutation - Captain Sentry was born as a tiny wrinkled 100 year old man. He ages backwards becoming younger as the years go by. His strange birth also seems to bestow him with unusual powers.
6. Induced Mutation - Captain Sentry was effected by the mysterious Compound X while defending a government science lab from nazi spies.
7. Super Science - Captain Sentry is a time traveler from the future who periodically defends the past from his nemesis, a future version of himself bent on destroying the past that created him!
4. Alien - Captain Sentry is an alien sent to earth as the first wave of an attack on the Earth. Captain Sentry turns against his commanders when he finds his own humanity among the people of earth.
7. Super Science - Captain Sentry is a time traveler from the future who periodically defends the past from his nemesis, a future version of himself bent on destroying the past that created him![/QUOTE]
Thank you Ghoul. Definitely got my mind turning. Love these 3 ideas. Going to play around with them.
would be that the Cap earned his stripes aiding the french resistance. Standing guard one night, he defended a safe house full of expatriot german scientists and french civilians single handedly against a science/occult paramilitary unit from Nazi.
in a last ditch attempt to gain access to the refugees, one german soldier fired off an experimental weapon. Unfortunately it had been deliberately boobytrapped by the runaway german scientists(whose recovery was the purpose of the attack)
the blast hit Cap square in the chest throwing him back fully through the building. Then, the weapon exploded, leaving a crater where the soldier had been.
The germans retreat, and the french resistance shows up to evacuate the refugees.
Rather than being hurt by the blast, Cap seems remarkably well, healthier, more fit (he used to need glasses)
he becomes something of a mascot to his unit and american armed forces in general. He never tired, he always one.. he was the guardian of justice and freedom...
He was Captain Sentinel.
throughout the war Captain Sentinel wasnt always on the front lines, but if he was there, the Allies won, or held the line.
When the war ended, the Axis collaps created a technological and occult diffusion, with petty dictators and generic criminals gaining access to terrible weapons both scientific and mystic. Captain Sentinel made it a personal mission to bring these people to justice.
He put his uniform on again, and fought in Korea. He fought constantly with MacArthur and held the line against the PLA while Allied forces retreated from the Yalu River.
Around the time of MacArthur's dissmissal, millitary officals began to realize that the Captain's health and endurance were far beyond normal levels, and after 5 years and countless engagements, he hadnt aged in any way.
As part of a new branch of the government, russian and german scientists studied the Captain in a secret lab in the new mexico desert.
It was there he discovered he could manipulate energy, and lead to Cap's greatest shame.
Through studying Cap's abilities, scientists were able to turn the fission bomb, into the exponentially more powerful Fusion Bomb.
Feeling slightly betrayed, Captain Sentinel left the military and began fighting injustice whereever he saw it.... However when Viet Nam flared up, he couldnt stop himself from protecting his fellow soldiers from harm in the jungles. He did what he could, but primarily he protected small villages and towns from unchecked aggression from either side. His noteriety among the civilian populous back in the states grew to astronomical proportions as the dubious nature of that police action came out, and his neutral actions to protect innocent life came to light.
After Vietnam, Captain Sentinel dedicated himself wholly to the selfless defense of innocence and freedom, whereever he was needed.
for 30 years he stood as an unquestioned leader in the fight against crime and injustice, alongside many notable heroes.
since that time, and the rise of Antimatter, Cap has dedicated himself to the elimination of nuclear weapons, and the abuses of technology in the world.
Have I already told you how awesome you are! Love it. On the lines I was thinking of!
being the german soldier who accidently got caught in the backlash of the exploding weapon.... at first he was blasted into pure energy, and it took him years to re-constitute himself....
beliving he'd come back from the dead as a god (and with powers to match) he became instrumental in places like spain and south america where facism still held sway...
using his ability to destroy matter, he set himself up as warlord on the largest caribbean island durring the turmoil of the early 1940s, and by '44 became the shadow ruler of the country.
That is, until the united states interfered. In 1959, US backing aided the revolution of Fidel Castro, ousting the former ruler, and his shadowy master.
Antimatter would have struck down Cuba's new leader, being a member of a "communist movement", but he saw the potential of the man, and shared his hatred of the US.
they became wary allies through the 60s and 70s. Durring this time, Antimatter begain his research into Nuclear weaponry. in the early 80's and into the 90s, antimatter began a subtle campaign in the Islands, gaining followers and consolidating power. With the fall of the Soviet Union in 1991, Cuba's economy crashed, and Antimatter took the oprotunity to secretly purchase much of the island. In 1992, he helped fund Doctor Destoryer's bid and American distruction (being a fellow german, afterall)
The Doctor's successes and failures became a model for Antimatter, and throughout the 90's he began his bid to conquer the US.
In 2004, he attempted to put his plan in motion, only to be stopped by the man who had, incidently, given Antimatter his powers.
Amazed that there was another being as powerful as he was, Antimatter felt compelled to destroy his "brother"
The battle that ensued on the outskirts of Vibora Bay (somewhere between the panhandle and new orleans, by its discription) left Antimatter too weak to keep his molecular structure together, the resulting seperation caused an explosion of near-nuclear proportions. it was only by shear luck on the Captain's part that no civilians were caught in the blast.
It appeared that Antimatter died in the explosion, but reciently his followers, many beliving fanatically in his godhood have been seen throughout the carabbean islands and central america, and it is likely that he has found a way to reconstitute himself again.
Beyond his normal energy powers, I could see him having a radiation-based pbAOE aura that debuffs his opponants, and the ability to explode in a massive explosion, and reconstitute himself at a later date (sooner if he does it on purpose, much longer if he was at his last breath)
At the present time, its unknown whether Antimatter CAN be killed.....
anyway i was wondering how he could have gotten his powers, i was tying with the idea of him working as a security guard at some lab and accidently walking in on an experiment boom blast has electric powers and can do super human feats, but what would be the best way to do that? also what would his goal be for fighting crime?
also his arch nemesis being a t1000 clone lol but i have no idea how to pull that off lol
What would be your goal for fighting crime? Could be Revenge (Batman), Glory (Booster Gold), Money (Luke Cage), Penance (Spiderman), Patriotism (Captain America) and on and on. There are as many reasons to fight crime as there are to be a rock star.
What conflict in his past drives the hero towards this goal? What happened pre-origin to your character that drives him towards his goal? How does being a superhero help him achieve his goal.
How is your T1000 villain directly involved in that conflict? What is T1000’s desire? How does your villain’s desire create conflict with your heroes desire? Doctor Doom doesn’t do things because he’s “evil”. Doom’s pride makes his conflict with the world. He thinks he knows best and rule under him would be best for the world. ALL GOOD VILLAINS SHOULD THINK THEY ARE THE HEROES.
A good origin (or good story for that matter) is all about conflict. It's about personal desires and the obstacles that stand in the way of that desire.
You might say that Peter Parker becomes Spiderman when he's bitten by a radioactive spider. I would say that he becomes Spiderman when he realizes he is responsible for Uncle Ben's death. If Peter Parker never had super powers, I bet he would still find someway to fight crime, don’t you? It's Spiderman's desire to "make up" for his uncle's death that drives him.
If you’re still having trouble, reach inside yourself. What do you want? What do you wish you could change? Who or what is standing in the ways of your goals and desires? Is it an evil boss? Parent you can’t live up to? The girl who doesn’t notice you? Is it someone that puts it’s own desire ahead of your own? Someone who doesn’t share your ideology? We all experience conflict; stories are just a way to share those ideas with others.
His story starts with him very very young waking up in the basement of an abandoned building that is engulfed in cockroaches. The boy studies the insects and finds that they are great survivors and wants to be the best survivor to ever exsist. He travels the world subjecting himself to very rigerous and painful survival experiments and learns martial arts. And just to be different he LOVES to use nun-chucks.
Later he develops a damage resistant/bullet proof exoskeleton and super sensitive antenaes and takes to the streets fighting crime.
Right now his only reason for fighting crime is to test his survivability which is a pretty neat twist imo. I could use some help fleshing out his backstory and details on how he ended up in the abandoned building and how he managed to create the suit and antenaes. Thanks for anyone's help in advance!!!
How about the hero being born slightly odd looking (maybe he an albino?) and placed in abusive foster care? He’s locked for weeks at a time in the basement. A horrible place covered in trash and roaches. From there he realizes what great survivors they are. He decides he is a survivor as well and escapes after years of neglect and torture. Living in old abandoned buildings and surviving much like the bugs he admires. He meets an old hobo and ex-villain “Vespertine”, who takes pity on him and teaches him to read and write, physics, mathematics as well as the prison martial art “52 Blocks”. Together they carve out an existence in the dark corners of the city finding warmth and friendship in each other.
One day his mentor and adopted father is killed by hired thugs defending the condemned building The Cockroach and other transients call home. The thugs work for a corrupt and twisted development corporation bent on transforming the slums of the city into a shining example of modern living.
The Cockroach decides to fight back against the evil corporation, building a low-tech armor and weapons while using the skills taught to him by his mentor to make the city safe for the other outcasts, homeless, and bums in the city. He's the hero you can't seem to kill... The Cockroach!