Thanks for the kind words! Alyosha appreciates it too, especially with how vulnerable and exposed he is in the final scene.
Alyosha is not yet one of my toons, though if I ever create another Federation character, he will be my next one. Whether I register him as a human or as an "Alien"...still debating that one.
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Just one question: how early did you guys suspect what was going on with Alyosha?
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Just one question: how early did you guys suspect what was going on with Alyosha?
I didn't suspect anything right until the reveal... Sometimes it's nice to be surprised by something, but sometimes it can be totally jarring and make the reader think "", so sometimes I'll drop some kind of hints rather than a total left-field twist, but as before, I thought it was a really nice, well written piece, and thoroughly enjoyed reading it
If you could give me some feedback on my entry, it would be much appreciated, as without feedback, we never know what we need to improve on
I'll look at your entry tonight when I take my lunch break.
I wouldn't say there weren't clues before the reveal, but a lot of them are things you probably wouldn't interpret in exactly the way Alyosha and th'Valek really mean them when you read his log entry for the first time.
I wonder if someday I'll be able to draw anything from this story...Alyosha might not be happy with me if I do it, especially if I find a way to do the sickbay scene (yeah, I like to imagine how my characters would react to what I do and say IRL ), but part of me REALLY wants to take on the challenge.
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Thanks, I'll look forward to your feedback Re-reading, yes, there were indeed a few clues, but indeed, they were not things which would be interpreted thus by someone not aware of the histories of the characters Likewise, it's interesting where these challenges take us. Initially, I simply wrote that Palmer was the captain of a Nova Class vessel (as I hadn't settled on the ships name ) When I wrote the First Contact Souvenirs entry, I had S'rR's head from the transporter room "in the direction of the nearest turbolift". I then researched the deckplans for the Nova Class, and discovered that there is only one turbolift point on the deck in question But now I know the ship like the back of my hand, and, unlike ships like the Enterprise or Voyager, I truly know my way around it, all just from taking the challenges, and having to think differently about the characters
The first thing I would suggest is to work on the formatting. Unfortunately message boards do not handle a copy-paste from Word very well, and all of the tabs end up getting lost. This means what you intended as separate paragraphs turn into a "wall of text." Adding an extra line break is the best thing you can do on a message board, to make your intended paragraph breaks clear (because I could tell you did intend for them to be in places that made sense).
Your story was definitely disturbing on a lot of levels. It was definitely very...occult, and there were other aspects of the relationship between Kane and his sister that gave me the creeps. Given that, it started to make me wonder if, after the flashback, your "modern" crew was about to end up in some sort of dangerous "Final Destination" type scenario.
And yeah, speaking of the places these challenges take us...I can tell there are going to be a lot more interesting places ahead if I stay with Alyosha as my main challenge character. Unfortunately I don't know of any easy sources I can go to for the kind of "data" I need, so I am in the position of having to come up with it on my own and try to stay consistent. It wasn't his thoughts and emotions that were difficult--his upbringing has made him as culturally human as it's possible for him to be considering his situation. (One thing I still have to figure out: HOW he keeps the rest of his crew, besides th'Valek and Sei, from catching on to the fact that he doesn't eat--because I don't think he can.) What was difficult was the physiology underneath. It's interesting how many natural reactions we're used to that I can still count on with most humanoid species we see on Star Trek, that I can't with Alyosha.
(Conversely...you couldn't really see it, but the Devidians found Alyosha's behavior absolutely creepy by their standards. To them, he was raised in a barnyard and acts like the farm animals, even in his natural form. When he hit them with his thoughts, they were horrified and disgusted to find him thinking in human language and with absolutely no comprehension of theirs. They think he's a complete abomination.)
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The first thing I would suggest is to work on the formatting. Unfortunately message boards do not handle a copy-paste from Word very well, and all of the tabs end up getting lost. This means what you intended as separate paragraphs turn into a "wall of text." Adding an extra line break is the best thing you can do on a message board, to make your intended paragraph breaks clear (because I could tell you did intend for them to be in places that made sense).
Thanks for the feedback, it's very much appreciated I know what you mean about paragraphing, and this is why I wrote the entire thing in the forum reply tab (several times due to laptop crashes >_< )
When I saw the challenge title, I wanted this to be 100% literal haunting, and having taken part in investigations myself, I know the kinds of things which can happen and methods used (Have never witnessed anything as dramatic as a room's furniture being randomly piled up though ) although I also wanted it to be something which could be explained by 24th Century science, like the subspace layer where Suspiria and her followers dwelt, and I figured that the Lantaru sector is one of the few locations where there might be a bit of a 'thinning of dimensional barriers' due to the subspace ruptures from the Omega experiment, and having a TARDIS in the cargo bay, would simply be 'fuel to the fire', so to speak...
and there were other aspects of the relationship between Kane and his sister that gave me the creeps.
Again, very much my intention When I first posted Kane's biography for feedback, the prevailing opinion was that he was 'too perfect', and needed a few flaws. I recently caught an early TNG episode, and heard Riker use the phrase 'Persian Flaw', and while I wasn't prepared to re-write his biography, as it had already been considered to write him into the existing events of TNG/DS-9 etc, I knew I had to come up with something pretty major to compensate for the other perceived perfections... Being an immortal Human (as in Highlander) addictive habits simply wouldn't be applicable, and any major personality issues, would render someone unfit for duty, so I was left with going down the route of the kind of 'deep dark secret' so shocking, someone would never reveal it to their peers. I'd always decided that Alix and Marcus would have been twins, and wanted his awakening as an immortal to be the trigger for her suicide so he would truly resent his nature, but then I remembered that gender-different twins are simply two eggs fertilized at the same time, so her DNA would not have been close enough anyway, so when writing his biography, I revised things a little... They were originally supposed to have been identical twins, until an lab accident while Mrs Kane was pregnant, meant damage to the Y chromosome of the other twin, required the in-utero genetic modification of substituting it with a copy of the undamaged X chromosome, thus completely changing the gender of the twin on a genetic level (and throwing out the genetic sequence which would lead to immortality on the first death) I remembered the behavior of Lauren, and decided to use that as the resultant flaw in Alix's personality, which Marcus had always had to accommodate and tolerate. And while it was definitely a case of her being in love with him, rather than the other way round, I figured that the dynamic of that relationship would be something he would never reveal to others, and would be a significant 'flaw' compared to his other positive traits...
Given that, it started to make me wonder if, after the flashback, your "modern" crew was about to end up in some sort of dangerous "Final Destination" type scenario.
No, the modern crew weren't in any kind of danger, simply that there were enough elements on board the ship for Alix's immortal spirit to say "I'm still here..." (and to reinforce that Palmer hadn't simply spun a tall tale to spook out her crew...)
And yeah, speaking of the places these challenges take us...I can tell there are going to be a lot more interesting places ahead if I stay with Alyosha as my main challenge character. Unfortunately I don't know of any easy sources I can go to for the kind of "data" I need, so I am in the position of having to come up with it on my own and try to stay consistent. It wasn't his thoughts and emotions that were difficult--his upbringing has made him as culturally human as it's possible for him to be considering his situation. (One thing I still have to figure out: HOW he keeps the rest of his crew, besides th'Valek and Sei, from catching on to the fact that he doesn't eat--because I don't think he can.) What was difficult was the physiology underneath. It's interesting how many natural reactions we're used to that I can still count on with most humanoid species we see on Star Trek, that I can't with Alyosha.
I think Alyosha has the potential to be a truly fascinating character, and it will be very interesting to see where you go with him in any future works It could simply be that as an 'unknown species', he was never regarded as a threat, and his biology simply considered a matter of doctor/patient confidentiality, so never discussed with his crew...
(Conversely...you couldn't really see it, but the Devidians found Alyosha's behavior absolutely creepy by their standards. To them, he was raised in a barnyard and acts like the farm animals, even in his natural form. When he hit them with his thoughts, they were horrified and disgusted to find him thinking in human language and with absolutely no comprehension of theirs. They think he's a complete abomination.)
And equally, that will be another interesting aspect to try and incorporate somehow, as it should make for some very interesting reading...
After reading through all the interesting, well-written entries I felt suddenly ashamed and profoundly inadequate. I have rewritten my own entry, cleaning up the clunkier writing (especially at the end) and removing some of the humorous bits that I felt fell flat. I even added in Crewman Lovegood from my cast list. Feel free to reread it and provide feedback if you wish. Or not!
Thanks for the feedback, it's very much appreciated I know what you mean about paragraphing, and this is why I wrote the entire thing in the forum reply tab (several times due to laptop crashes >_< )
I think that perhaps 1 extra line break, compared to what you've been doing, should be enough to get the story to break up the way mine did and make the paragraphs and dialogue easiest to follow.
When I saw the challenge title, I wanted this to be 100% literal haunting, and having taken part in investigations myself, I know the kinds of things which can happen and methods used (Have never witnessed anything as dramatic as a room's furniture being randomly piled up though ) although I also wanted it to be something which could be explained by 24th Century science, like the subspace layer where Suspiria and her followers dwelt, and I figured that the Lantaru sector is one of the few locations where there might be a bit of a 'thinning of dimensional barriers' due to the subspace ruptures from the Omega experiment, and having a TARDIS in the cargo bay, would simply be 'fuel to the fire', so to speak...
Oh...I wasn't aware there were crossovers going on, since I'm new to the LC's.
I've never been involved in any sort of paranormal stuff, though, and honestly wouldn't have felt comfortable writing it. For me, the fact that there was something 24th-century-science related did help. I think that was a wise decision as a writer because it opens you up to a wider audience.
But since the idea for Alyosha had popped into my head the night before, when I stumbled across the prompt, I realized he (and certain parties very angry with him) would be quite appropriate to use. He would, in his natural form, be considered a ghost of sorts. And if you're wondering why the sensors aboard the Chin'toka never registered the presence of the intruders...well...you can imagine certain warnings had to be disabled aboard that ship or else they'd be going off all the time. Another reason for Alyosha to be mad at Drake and to feel like Drake was callously playing games with the lives of his crew.
And while it was definitely a case of her being in love with him, rather than the other way round, I figured that the dynamic of that relationship would be something he would never reveal to others, and would be a significant 'flaw' compared to his other positive traits...
Not being familiar with the Highlander series, I didn't really have any precedents (or know who this Lauren was) to compare with. Or even know that Kane was a Highlander in the first place. But yeah, I was pretty creeped out when I figured out that there was a bit of a "Cousin Dupree" moment going on there (if you know the Steely Dan song).
No, the modern crew weren't in any kind of danger, simply that there were enough elements on board the ship for Alix's immortal spirit to say "I'm still here..." (and to reinforce that Palmer hadn't simply spun a tall tale to spook out her crew...)
Ahh, I see. I think that perhaps with the more disturbing undercurrents of her relationship with Kane, not to mention the suicide, I was expecting her to be disturbed on even more levels and ready to do something horrible.
I think Alyosha has the potential to be a truly fascinating character, and it will be very interesting to see where you go with him in any future works It could simply be that as an 'unknown species', he was never regarded as a threat, and his biology simply considered a matter of doctor/patient confidentiality, so never discussed with his crew...
The problem is that the TNG episode "Time's Arrow" happened in 2368, way before the time STO takes place. And with Alyosha having been found in a creche beneath San Francisco, not that far from where Data's head was found (maybe he was even the reason archaeological teams were poking around in San Francisco?), it became blatantly apparent that he was Devidian. And by that time--he was already an Academy freshman. That meant Starfleet had a huge problem on their hands, as they would see it. He's been having to prove himself ever since.
It's also why Alyosha can't publicly be an unknown species that happens to look like a human. He has to be human in the eyes of almost everyone, because sadly, it would be hard to earn the trust of a crew or of one's superiors when every other encounter with his species has involved their trying to put humanoids on the menu. Remember what happened to Simon Tarses just for being a quarter Romulan? Unfortunately Alyosha could be vulnerable to something even worse if his nature isn't kept under wraps. Some would even believe he needed to be killed right then and there.
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I think that perhaps 1 extra line break, compared to what you've been doing, should be enough to get the story to break up the way mine did and make the paragraphs and dialogue easiest to follow.
I do see what you mean. The thing I was against, was that I wanted the bangs to stand out enough from dialogue for the reader to know that they were not merely 'background noise', even if not immediately obvious as communication from The Other Side...
Oh...I wasn't aware there were crossovers going on, since I'm new to the LC's.
There aren't any official ones, but I've been writing a Doctor Who manuscript, which features the crew of the Endeavour and the alien species I created, and I guess this entry could be considered as a kind of epilogue to that manuscript, where the Doctor had 'hitched a lift'...
I've never been involved in any sort of paranormal stuff, though, and honestly wouldn't have felt comfortable writing it. For me, the fact that there was something 24th-century-science related did help. I think that was a wise decision as a writer because it opens you up to a wider audience.
My father in law hosts paranormal investigations on a fairly regular basis, so as a subject, it's not something which worries me to be around, but as mentioned, I wanted it to be a definite haunting of deck 13, even if deck 13 is not normally haunted, and I felt that by doing so in such a way as to be explainable by 24th century science, it would come across as suitably 'atmospheric/disturbing', but still within genre
But since the idea for Alyosha had popped into my head the night before, when I stumbled across the prompt, I realized he (and certain parties very angry with him) would be quite appropriate to use. He would, in his natural form, be considered a ghost of sorts. And if you're wondering why the sensors aboard the Chin'toka never registered the presence of the intruders...well...you can imagine certain warnings had to be disabled aboard that ship or else they'd be going off all the time. Another reason for Alyosha to be mad at Drake and to feel like Drake was callously playing games with the lives of his crew.
I think the concept works fantastically, and it will be great to read more about Alyosha, and indeed, it does make sense that the sensors would be thus disabled...
Not being familiar with the Highlander series, I didn't really have any precedents
A quick summary of Highlander-verse immortals, is that they age in the same way as other Humans until they are somehow killed, and their biology then revives them as an immortal, although in none of the episodes or films, is it ever truly explained why an immortal is thus, or how their regenerative abilities work. I've always assumed it was a genetic trait, with the body's bioelectrical field operating like a self-recharging dynamo, and thus powering the body's healing processes at an accelerated rate. As mentioned above, as Alix and Marcus should originally have been 100% identical twins, she has the same genetic sequence for immortality, but the lack of the Y chromosome threw it off enough that she was simply a 'pre-immortal' who's synaptic patterns survived the death of her body.
Lauren was a guest character on DS-9, who (along with two others) had undergone the same genetic engineering as Doctor Bashir, but, as a result, had personality quirks which meant they institutionalized rather than productive members of society. Lauren's quirk, was that she had a very predatory and overt sexuality, and was somewhat disconnected from reality. I figured that even though the genetic re-sequencing Alix experienced was while as an embryo, and was simply a necessary switch of gender, rather than any intellectual or physical enhancements, it still caused a similar personality quirk, although rather than being flirtatious towards everyone, like Lauren, her affections were much more focused, but just as socially unacceptable, if not more so. As mentioned, this is something which Marcus has had to accommodate and tolerate, so gives him as much a shameful secret as her, which I consider to be his Persian Flaw...
But yeah, I was pretty creeped out when I figured out that there was a bit of a "Cousin Dupree" moment going on there (if you know the Steely Dan song).
Ahh, I see. I think that perhaps with the more disturbing undercurrents of her relationship with Kane, not to mention the suicide, I was expecting her to be disturbed on even more levels and ready to do something horrible.
The suicide was a genuine 'Darwin Award', rather than an attempt to off herself due to psychological reasons, and as above, the nature of her feelings towards her brother, was so I could give him a truly terrible secret flaw... She wouldn't've done anything else to the modern crew, other than announcing her presence
The problem is that the TNG episode "Time's Arrow" happened in 2368, way before the time STO takes place. And with Alyosha having been found in a creche beneath San Francisco, not that far from where Data's head was found (maybe he was even the reason archaeological teams were poking around in San Francisco?), it became blatantly apparent that he was Devidian. And by that time--he was already an Academy freshman. That meant Starfleet had a huge problem on their hands, as they would see it. He's been having to prove himself ever since.
It's also why Alyosha can't publicly be an unknown species that happens to look like a human. He has to be human in the eyes of almost everyone, because sadly, it would be hard to earn the trust of a crew or of one's superiors when every other encounter with his species has involved their trying to put humanoids on the menu. Remember what happened to Simon Tarses just for being a quarter Romulan? Unfortunately Alyosha could be vulnerable to something even worse if his nature isn't kept under wraps. Some would even believe he needed to be killed right then and there.
Ahh, that makes more sense, and yes, I see what you mean as to why he has to be Human. Maybe future works could focus on some of the ways in which he does so. Have you ever watched the movie Gattaca? That covers somewhat similar ground in terms of identity concealment and presentation
I do see what you mean. The thing I was against, was that I wanted the bangs to stand out enough from dialogue for the reader to know that they were not merely 'background noise', even if not immediately obvious as communication from The Other Side...
I think you still would have been able to pull that off with the additional line breaks. I meant that everything should have another line break.
That way you'd get an effect kind of like how I've done the paragraph breaks in this post.
As mentioned above, as Alix and Marcus should originally have been 100% identical twins, she has the same genetic sequence for immortality, but the lack of the Y chromosome threw it off enough that she was simply a 'pre-immortal' who's synaptic patterns survived the death of her body.
So there are no fully immortal women in the Highlander universe?
Lauren was a guest character on DS-9, who (along with two others) had undergone the same genetic engineering as Doctor Bashir, but, as a result, had personality quirks which meant they institutionalized rather than productive members of society. Lauren's quirk, was that she had a very predatory and overt sexuality, and was somewhat disconnected from reality.
Oh, I see. I had thought you were referring to someone from the Highlander universe rather than one of the DS9 Augments.
I figured that even though the genetic re-sequencing Alix experienced was while as an embryo, and was simply a necessary switch of gender, rather than any intellectual or physical enhancements, it still caused a similar personality quirk, although rather than being flirtatious towards everyone, like Lauren, her affections were much more focused, but just as socially unacceptable, if not more so. As mentioned, this is something which Marcus has had to accommodate and tolerate, so gives him as much a shameful secret as her, which I consider to be his Persian Flaw...
I wonder why Alix wasn't sent to counseling or treatment to stop her behavior? I can't imagine their parents--or Marcus himself--being pleased with what was going on. Why did they just "tolerate" it? Was it fear of exposure to legal trouble? Or did they know they had the immortality gene and could be exposed by seeking treatment?
The suicide was a genuine 'Darwin Award', rather than an attempt to off herself due to psychological reasons, and as above, the nature of her feelings towards her brother, was so I could give him a truly terrible secret flaw... She wouldn't've done anything else to the modern crew, other than announcing her presence
I see. It does still seem like a rather disturbed thing to do given the extreme costs of being wrong. But it's good to know she won't go all poltergeist on the crew.
Ahh, that makes more sense, and yes, I see what you mean as to why he has to be Human. Maybe future works could focus on some of the ways in which he does so. Have you ever watched the movie Gattaca? That covers somewhat similar ground in terms of identity concealment and presentation
Yeah, I saw Gattaca. At least it's fortunate that humanity is expected rather than perfection--much easier target to hit! But yeah, I imagine some of the ways he avoids attracting notice will show up in other works.
Some of it isn't "fake," though, especially when it comes to cultural upbringing. He has known no other homeworld than Earth. It's unknown whether the "egg" he came from (or whatever the structure is) originated on Earth or Devidia, but the Devidians' intentions seem to have been to outright colonize Earth as a feeding ground, and so presumably that "egg" was formed in 1893.
The Enterprise crew's intervention in the past happened so quickly that it resulted in the creche (which was kept some distance away from the area of the actual temporal incursion, though still in the city) being left behind. Given the passage of so much time, Alyosha was the only viable one left by the time the place was discovered in 2355 or so. So until the discovery was made in 2368, he knew nothing about his own species aside from what was known about him, and everything he'd done had been with the goal of fitting in where and with whom he felt at home: on Earth, in human society.
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After reading through all the interesting, well-written entries I felt suddenly ashamed and profoundly inadequate. I have rewritten my own entry, cleaning up the clunkier writing (especially at the end) and removing some of the humorous bits that I felt fell flat. I even added in Crewman Lovegood from my cast list. Feel free to reread it and provide feedback if you wish. Or not!
You shouldn't feel inadequate or like a bad writer!
Right off the bat, your sense of humor grabbed my attention. Mariachi hunt? War banjo? My goodness, how did this program ever come about?
I should've known that there was going to be a punchline at the end--but it took me by surprise seeing him have a hatching day party! Honestly, that guy took it even worse than Worf did in "Parallels," to have a birthday party!
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I'm with Gulberat. I love your story. Your sense of humour really does appeal to me.
And I think I have to award you something for having the best line to appear in any Literary Challenge...
"In the best traditions of Starfleet, I have decided that the entire command structure of this vessel will accompany me into whatever dangerous, pan-dimensional time warp has manifested as deck thirteen."
So there are no fully immortal women in the Highlander universe?
There are indeed, in this case, it was simply a case of the genetic re-sequencing unintentionally disturbing the relevant sequence which would create the immortal effect. A bit of writer's licence
Oh, I see. I had thought you were referring to someone from the Highlander universe rather than one of the DS9 Augments.
No, I thought the results of the DS-9 Augments were a good enough example of why the procedures are illegal (In Alix's case, it may have been allowed because it was correcting accidental genetic damage, and no physical or mental enhancements, 'just' a change of gender...)
I wonder why Alix wasn't sent to counseling or treatment to stop her behavior? I can't imagine their parents--or Marcus himself--being pleased with what was going on. Why did they just "tolerate" it? Was it fear of exposure to legal trouble?
Well, I've seen enough Jerry Springer and the like to know that some strange things can happen I think in reality, her behavior in company would not have been overt enough to be noticed, and anything that was, simply passed off as a joke, and anything that happened between Alix and Marcus would have been between them (and as mentioned, his Persian Flaw that he did not object)
I see. It does still seem like a rather disturbed thing to do given the extreme costs of being wrong.
I agree, it is a somewhat extreme action to take, but if able to see one's own twin suddenly and unquestionably immortal, I can see why someone who wasn't necessarily 'firing on all thrusters' taking the chance...
Yeah, I saw Gattaca. At least it's fortunate that humanity is expected rather than perfection--much easier target to hit! But yeah, I imagine some of the ways he avoids attracting notice will show up in other works.
Some of it isn't "fake," though, especially when it comes to cultural upbringing. He has known no other homeworld than Earth. It's unknown whether the "egg" he came from (or whatever the structure is) originated on Earth or Devidia, but the Devidians' intentions seem to have been to outright colonize Earth as a feeding ground, and so presumably that "egg" was formed in 1893.
The Enterprise crew's intervention in the past happened so quickly that it resulted in the creche (which was kept some distance away from the area of the actual temporal incursion, though still in the city) being left behind. Given the passage of so much time, Alyosha was the only viable one left by the time the place was discovered in 2355 or so. So until the discovery was made in 2368, he knew nothing about his own species aside from what was known about him, and everything he'd done had been with the goal of fitting in where and with whom he felt at home: on Earth, in human society.
Totally see what you're meaning, and indeed, cultural upbringing would play considerably more of a part than genetics, like Worf, who's behavior was not really 'as Klingon', as those raised in the Empire.
The Enterprise crew's intervention in the past happened so quickly that it resulted in the creche (which was kept some distance away from the area of the actual temporal incursion, though still in the city) being left behind. Given the passage of so much time, Alyosha was the only viable one left by the time the place was discovered in 2355 or so. So until the discovery was made in 2368, he knew nothing about his own species aside from what was known about him, and everything he'd done had been with the goal of fitting in where and with whom he felt at home: on Earth, in human society.
Indeed, I really like the idea of Alyosha's as a character, and with the Devidians having been such an unexplored race, you certainly have a broad canvas to work on
Thank you for all the kind words. I no longer feel inadequate, though I do see some more spelling and grammar errors I need to clean up. Please simply take it as a compliment to all of you that I felt challenged to do better.
Honestly, that guy took it even worse than Worf did in "Parallels," to have a birthday party!
In Khas' case, it's less about being the center of attention and more about being stuffed in a room with a bunch of hooting, filthy primates who will keep touching him with their grubby meat-hands. And, being captain, he must allow it and pretend that he finds the gesture meaningful.
@Squatsauce:
And I think I have to award you something for having the best line to appear in any Literary Challenge...
"In the best traditions of Starfleet, I have decided that the entire command structure of this vessel will accompany me into whatever dangerous, pan-dimensional time warp has manifested as deck thirteen."
I never understood why the away teams tended to consist of "all the guys who know how to run a ship" and, maybe, "a guy who can die to underline how dangerous away missions can be". Don't they have a few annoying ensigns and non-critical crewmen they could assign to those things? Seriously, the Enterprise was always, like, one transporter accident away from leaving Wesley Crusher or Guinan in charge of the ship.
I'm with Gulberat. I love your story. Your sense of humour really does appeal to me.
And I think I have to award you something for having the best line to appear in any Literary Challenge...
"In the best traditions of Starfleet, I have decided that the entire command structure of this vessel will accompany me into whatever dangerous, pan-dimensional time warp has manifested as deck thirteen."
QFT ... all of it.
The back-and-forth discussion above has been VERY enlightening to read for me as well.
Well, I've seen enough Jerry Springer and the like to know that some strange things can happen I think in reality, her behavior in company would not have been overt enough to be noticed, and anything that was, simply passed off as a joke, and anything that happened between Alix and Marcus would have been between them (and as mentioned, his Persian Flaw that he did not object)
On a psychological level, perhaps the extreme genetic closeness between the two meant it was a bit of a narcissistic thing on Marcus' part?
I agree, it is a somewhat extreme action to take, but if able to see one's own twin suddenly and unquestionably immortal, I can see why someone who wasn't necessarily 'firing on all thrusters' taking the chance...
Yeah...definitely not arguing that. I was just explaining why I had thought she was even more nuts than she really was.
Totally see what you're meaning, and indeed, cultural upbringing would play considerably more of a part than genetics, like Worf, who's behavior was not really 'as Klingon', as those raised in the Empire.
I never understood why we didn't see more evidence of human influence on Worf. There should've been at least something, unless he deliberately played ignorant of human customs. BTW, he should, specifically, have shown at least some influence of Belorussian culture. Even a little reference or vocabulary word here and there would've helped to make that backstory feel less tacked-on.
The difference between Alyosha and a "native-raised" Devidian is much greater. I would imagine young Devidians are taught to ignore the terror of their victims. There's a telling line in "Time's Arrow" where it was apparently so bad that Troi is able to feel an aftershock of the victims' fear even though their life force has been completely consumed already. That made me think that the process was a) deeply distressing or painful to the victim and b) the victims felt their attackers' malevolence and hunger.
(That's also why--besides the fact that I had a mutiny to prevent!--that I allowed the victims to feel Alyosha's emotions as he fought to bring them back.)
They probably view it from the same moral standpoint as when you raise a child on a farm and teach him or her to accept the slaughter of livestock. (Of course to many humans there's a big difference between livestock and another human being, but the point remains.) When Alyosha accidentally killed his caretaker as a child, no one had ever taught him that, so he reacted from a "natural" conscience and it absolutely shook him to the core.
Thank you for all the kind words. I no longer feel inadequate, though I do see some more spelling and grammar errors I need to clean up. Please simply take it as a compliment to all of you that I felt challenged to do better.
Believe me, you did fine!
In Khas' case, it's less about being the center of attention and more about being stuffed in a room with a bunch of hooting, filthy primates who will keep touching him with their grubby meat-hands. And, being captain, he must allow it and pretend that he finds the gesture meaningful.
LOL, yikes. Am I right that Khas is an insectoid of some sort?
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After reading through all the interesting, well-written entries I felt suddenly ashamed and profoundly inadequate. I have rewritten my own entry, cleaning up the clunkier writing (especially at the end) and removing some of the humorous bits that I felt fell flat. I even added in Crewman Lovegood from my cast list. Feel free to reread it and provide feedback if you wish. Or not!
I liked it the first time, but the re-write really polished things, and it's a really good entry
LOL, yikes. Am I right that Khas is an insectoid of some sort?
Khas could be described as an anthropo-arachnoid. He's about what I'd imagine you'd get if a Xenomorph and an accountant had a baby and then had that baby join Starfleet.
Yeah...definitely not arguing that. I was just explaining why I had thought she was even more nuts than she really was.
I think if it had been a longer piece, I might indeed have had the interactions with the modern crew taking more sinister turns, but mostly, I just wanted to reinforce that the haunting had been a genuine experience
I never understood why we didn't see more evidence of human influence on Worf. There should've been at least something, unless he deliberately played ignorant of human customs. BTW, he should, specifically, have shown at least some influence of Belorussian culture. Even a little reference or vocabulary word here and there would've helped to make that backstory feel less tacked-on.
Worf made a comment in DS-9 about how he had accidentally killed another child while playing soccer, so I think as a child, he may indeed have participated more in Human culture, but become more withdrawn after that incident. The episode of TNG where they found the other Klingons showed just how separated from Klingon culture Worf truly was. If anything, Sisko embraced the Klingon lifestyle much more than Worf ever did
The difference between Alyosha and a "native-raised" Devidian is much greater. I would imagine young Devidians are taught to ignore the terror of their victims. There's a telling line in "Time's Arrow" where it was apparently so bad that Troi is able to feel an aftershock of the victims' fear even though their life force has been completely consumed already. That made me think that the process was a) deeply distressing or painful to the victim and b) the victims felt their attackers' malevolence and hunger.
(That's also why--besides the fact that I had a mutiny to prevent!--that I allowed the victims to feel Alyosha's emotions as he fought to bring them back.)
They probably view it from the same moral standpoint as when you raise a child on a farm and teach him or her to accept the slaughter of livestock. (Of course to many humans there's a big difference between livestock and another human being, but the point remains.) When Alyosha accidentally killed his caretaker as a child, no one had ever taught him that, so he reacted from a "natural" conscience and it absolutely shook him to the core.
It could be, that Devidians are somewhat like Vampires when it comes to learning to ignore the terror of their victims. I often wondered if a Vampire's 'lack of a soul', was what enabled them to feed without feeling sympathy for their victims. You're definitely going to have to post up more of Alyosha's escapades, I'd love to read them
Khas could be described as an anthropo-arachnoid. He's about what I'd imagine you'd get if a Xenomorph and an accountant had a baby and then had that baby join Starfleet.
Well, there comes a time in every accountant's life where having a crusty, disconsolate baby with a ravening space monster is simply the most fiscally responsible thing to do. I know what you're thinking: "Who would even want to have a baby with an accountant?" But the answer to that is pretty straightforward: Aliens.
Yes, I think that there would be a certain amount of narcissism to it, overall, I just figured GSA would be a suitably significant personality flaw
Yeah, especially since "normally" GSA occurs when the siblings were not raised together (and therefore the Westermarck effect didn't prevent the attraction).
Worf made a comment in DS-9 about how he had accidentally killed another child while playing soccer, so I think as a child, he may indeed have participated more in Human culture, but become more withdrawn after that incident. The episode of TNG where they found the other Klingons showed just how separated from Klingon culture Worf truly was. If anything, Sisko embraced the Klingon lifestyle much more than Worf ever did
Not so sure about Sisko, but it might well be arguable that Curzon and Jadzia Dax were more into the "modern" Klingon culture than Worf was.
And yeah, I was definitely thinking about the soccer incident that Worf had. But it strikes me that he seems ignorant of human culture to the point of not even knowing the basics that you couldn't help seeing if you were watching TV, or the 24th-century equivalent thereof.
It could be, that Devidians are somewhat like Vampires when it comes to learning to ignore the terror of their victims. I often wondered if a Vampire's 'lack of a soul', was what enabled them to feed without feeling sympathy for their victims.
Quite possibly. Then again, plain old human psychology is capable of some pretty serious extremes on its own (think of the Milgram and Stanford Prison Experiments! :eek: ). Even regular people, if not specifically educated to watch for it, are subject to dangerous and even cruel cognitive biases. That's part of why I decided to go with the explanation of it being a learned behavior rather than some sort of genetic inability to emote or feel sympathy. There's a whole evolutionary explanation I've been coming up with, but I won't post it here because it would take up way too much room.
[quote[You're definitely going to have to post up more of Alyosha's escapades, I'd love to read th]m [/QUOTE]
Thanks! Hopefully the next prompts will inspire me. Exploring the fallout of this incident is definitely something I would do, given the opportunity.
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Yeah, especially since "normally" GSA occurs when the siblings were not raised together (and therefore the Westermarck effect didn't prevent the attraction).
That's very true... Of course, incest is not illegal in Japan, so I think the Westermarck effect may be as much social conditioning, as some 'inbuilt' biological awareness. Equally, Alix's genetic re-sequencing could have nullified the Westermarck effect in regards to her own behavior, and Marcus could simply be a deviant in his own right, because as mentioned, people felt he was 'too perfect', and as I wasn't willing to change him with regards that perfection, I had to add a flaw equally disgraceful to compensate
Not so sure about Sisko, but it might well be arguable that Curzon and Jadzia Dax were more into the "modern" Klingon culture than Worf was.
Dax was definitely into Klingon culture, and 'got it' more than Worf ever did. As for Sisko, I was thinking of the episode where they had to go undercover as Klingons at some event to assassinate Gowron, and Sisko was able to really 'get into character'
And yeah, I was definitely thinking about the soccer incident that Worf had. But it strikes me that he seems ignorant of human culture to the point of not even knowing the basics that you couldn't help seeing if you were watching TV, or the 24th-century equivalent thereof.
I do see what you mean, I'm just wondering if some of that wasn't simply feigned behavior and deliberate cultural rejection, so no one could doubt his Klingon Credentials, rather than a genuine ignorance
Quite possibly. Then again, plain old human psychology is capable of some pretty serious extremes on its own (think of the Milgram and Stanford Prison Experiments! ). Even regular people, if not specifically educated to watch for it, are subject to dangerous and even cruel cognitive biases. That's part of why I decided to go with the explanation of it being a learned behavior rather than some sort of genetic inability to emote or feel sympathy. There's a whole evolutionary explanation I've been coming up with, but I won't post it here because it would take up way too much room.
That's very true, and definitely makes sense that you went with that route. The explanation sounds fantastic, it would be great to read it
Thanks! Hopefully the next prompts will inspire me. Exploring the fallout of this incident is definitely something I would do, given the opportunity.
You're very welcome, and likewise, thanks for your feedback on my own entry, it's very much appreciated, I'll look forwards to seeing what entries future challenges inspire you to create
I never understood why the away teams tended to consist of "all the guys who know how to run a ship" and, maybe, "a guy who can die to underline how dangerous away missions can be". Don't they have a few annoying ensigns and non-critical crewmen they could assign to those things? Seriously, the Enterprise was always, like, one transporter accident away from leaving Wesley Crusher or Guinan in charge of the ship.
I completely understand and agree with you here. That's one of the reasons I find it such a brilliant line
I do see what you mean, I'm just wondering if some of that wasn't simply feigned behavior and deliberate cultural rejection, so no one could doubt his Klingon Credentials, rather than a genuine ignorance
Could be. It would certainly be quite the irony if (assuming he knew where Worf was raised) Alyosha went up to Worf speaking Russian and expecting Worf to be interested in talking about things from that part of the world. Worf would be none the wiser about the irony, of course, but it would be rather funny.
That's very true, and definitely makes sense that you went with that route. The explanation sounds fantastic, it would be great to read it
Still fine-tuning it, so it's not quite ready for prime time yet.
You're very welcome, and likewise, thanks for your feedback on my own entry, it's very much appreciated, I'll look forwards to seeing what entries future challenges inspire you to create
You're most welcome.
BTW, I am not sure if it works when I send a PM on this board. Did you receive the one I sent you? If not, I could try in-game mail instead.
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I'd be willing to borrow money at Ferengi rates of interest to bet on it Worf might have liked to act like a Klingon, or more accurately, how he thought a Klingon should act, but deep down, he was pretty insecure, and when confronted with other Klingons, his behavior was always a little off compared to the others...
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Alyosha is not yet one of my toons, though if I ever create another Federation character, he will be my next one. Whether I register him as a human or as an "Alien"...still debating that one.
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If you could give me some feedback on my entry, it would be much appreciated, as without feedback, we never know what we need to improve on
Like Marcus, Not until the reveal for me either.
I liked it
I wouldn't say there weren't clues before the reveal, but a lot of them are things you probably wouldn't interpret in exactly the way Alyosha and th'Valek really mean them when you read his log entry for the first time.
I wonder if someday I'll be able to draw anything from this story...Alyosha might not be happy with me if I do it, especially if I find a way to do the sickbay scene (yeah, I like to imagine how my characters would react to what I do and say IRL
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The first thing I would suggest is to work on the formatting. Unfortunately message boards do not handle a copy-paste from Word very well, and all of the tabs end up getting lost. This means what you intended as separate paragraphs turn into a "wall of text." Adding an extra line break is the best thing you can do on a message board, to make your intended paragraph breaks clear (because I could tell you did intend for them to be in places that made sense).
Your story was definitely disturbing on a lot of levels. It was definitely very...occult, and there were other aspects of the relationship between Kane and his sister that gave me the creeps. Given that, it started to make me wonder if, after the flashback, your "modern" crew was about to end up in some sort of dangerous "Final Destination" type scenario.
And yeah, speaking of the places these challenges take us...I can tell there are going to be a lot more interesting places ahead if I stay with Alyosha as my main challenge character. Unfortunately I don't know of any easy sources I can go to for the kind of "data" I need, so I am in the position of having to come up with it on my own and try to stay consistent. It wasn't his thoughts and emotions that were difficult--his upbringing has made him as culturally human as it's possible for him to be considering his situation. (One thing I still have to figure out: HOW he keeps the rest of his crew, besides th'Valek and Sei, from catching on to the fact that he doesn't eat--because I don't think he can.) What was difficult was the physiology underneath. It's interesting how many natural reactions we're used to that I can still count on with most humanoid species we see on Star Trek, that I can't with Alyosha.
(Conversely...you couldn't really see it, but the Devidians found Alyosha's behavior absolutely creepy by their standards. To them, he was raised in a barnyard and acts like the farm animals, even in his natural form. When he hit them with his thoughts, they were horrified and disgusted to find him thinking in human language and with absolutely no comprehension of theirs. They think he's a complete abomination.)
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Excellent, that was what I was going for
When I saw the challenge title, I wanted this to be 100% literal haunting, and having taken part in investigations myself, I know the kinds of things which can happen and methods used (Have never witnessed anything as dramatic as a room's furniture being randomly piled up though ) although I also wanted it to be something which could be explained by 24th Century science, like the subspace layer where Suspiria and her followers dwelt, and I figured that the Lantaru sector is one of the few locations where there might be a bit of a 'thinning of dimensional barriers' due to the subspace ruptures from the Omega experiment, and having a TARDIS in the cargo bay, would simply be 'fuel to the fire', so to speak...
Again, very much my intention
No, the modern crew weren't in any kind of danger, simply that there were enough elements on board the ship for Alix's immortal spirit to say "I'm still here..." (and to reinforce that Palmer hadn't simply spun a tall tale to spook out her crew...)
I think Alyosha has the potential to be a truly fascinating character, and it will be very interesting to see where you go with him in any future works
And equally, that will be another interesting aspect to try and incorporate somehow, as it should make for some very interesting reading...
I think that perhaps 1 extra line break, compared to what you've been doing, should be enough to get the story to break up the way mine did and make the paragraphs and dialogue easiest to follow.
Oh...I wasn't aware there were crossovers going on, since I'm new to the LC's.
I've never been involved in any sort of paranormal stuff, though, and honestly wouldn't have felt comfortable writing it. For me, the fact that there was something 24th-century-science related did help. I think that was a wise decision as a writer because it opens you up to a wider audience.
But since the idea for Alyosha had popped into my head the night before, when I stumbled across the prompt, I realized he (and certain parties very angry with him) would be quite appropriate to use. He would, in his natural form, be considered a ghost of sorts. And if you're wondering why the sensors aboard the Chin'toka never registered the presence of the intruders...well...you can imagine certain warnings had to be disabled aboard that ship or else they'd be going off all the time. Another reason for Alyosha to be mad at Drake and to feel like Drake was callously playing games with the lives of his crew.
Not being familiar with the Highlander series, I didn't really have any precedents (or know who this Lauren was) to compare with. Or even know that Kane was a Highlander in the first place.
Ahh, I see. I think that perhaps with the more disturbing undercurrents of her relationship with Kane, not to mention the suicide, I was expecting her to be disturbed on even more levels and ready to do something horrible.
The problem is that the TNG episode "Time's Arrow" happened in 2368, way before the time STO takes place. And with Alyosha having been found in a creche beneath San Francisco, not that far from where Data's head was found (maybe he was even the reason archaeological teams were poking around in San Francisco?), it became blatantly apparent that he was Devidian. And by that time--he was already an Academy freshman. That meant Starfleet had a huge problem on their hands, as they would see it. He's been having to prove himself ever since.
It's also why Alyosha can't publicly be an unknown species that happens to look like a human. He has to be human in the eyes of almost everyone, because sadly, it would be hard to earn the trust of a crew or of one's superiors when every other encounter with his species has involved their trying to put humanoids on the menu. Remember what happened to Simon Tarses just for being a quarter Romulan? Unfortunately Alyosha could be vulnerable to something even worse if his nature isn't kept under wraps. Some would even believe he needed to be killed right then and there.
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There aren't any official ones, but I've been writing a Doctor Who manuscript, which features the crew of the Endeavour and the alien species I created, and I guess this entry could be considered as a kind of epilogue to that manuscript, where the Doctor had 'hitched a lift'...
My father in law hosts paranormal investigations on a fairly regular basis, so as a subject, it's not something which worries me to be around, but as mentioned, I wanted it to be a definite haunting of deck 13, even if deck 13 is not normally haunted, and I felt that by doing so in such a way as to be explainable by 24th century science, it would come across as suitably 'atmospheric/disturbing', but still within genre
I think the concept works fantastically, and it will be great to read more about Alyosha, and indeed, it does make sense that the sensors would be thus disabled...
A quick summary of Highlander-verse immortals, is that they age in the same way as other Humans until they are somehow killed, and their biology then revives them as an immortal, although in none of the episodes or films, is it ever truly explained why an immortal is thus, or how their regenerative abilities work. I've always assumed it was a genetic trait, with the body's bioelectrical field operating like a self-recharging dynamo, and thus powering the body's healing processes at an accelerated rate. As mentioned above, as Alix and Marcus should originally have been 100% identical twins, she has the same genetic sequence for immortality, but the lack of the Y chromosome threw it off enough that she was simply a 'pre-immortal' who's synaptic patterns survived the death of her body.
Lauren was a guest character on DS-9, who (along with two others) had undergone the same genetic engineering as Doctor Bashir, but, as a result, had personality quirks which meant they institutionalized rather than productive members of society. Lauren's quirk, was that she had a very predatory and overt sexuality, and was somewhat disconnected from reality. I figured that even though the genetic re-sequencing Alix experienced was while as an embryo, and was simply a necessary switch of gender, rather than any intellectual or physical enhancements, it still caused a similar personality quirk, although rather than being flirtatious towards everyone, like Lauren, her affections were much more focused, but just as socially unacceptable, if not more so. As mentioned, this is something which Marcus has had to accommodate and tolerate, so gives him as much a shameful secret as her, which I consider to be his Persian Flaw...
Here's a link to his bio, for additional reference...
The suicide was a genuine 'Darwin Award', rather than an attempt to off herself due to psychological reasons, and as above, the nature of her feelings towards her brother, was so I could give him a truly terrible secret flaw... She wouldn't've done anything else to the modern crew, other than announcing her presence
Ahh, that makes more sense, and yes, I see what you mean as to why he has to be Human. Maybe future works could focus on some of the ways in which he does so. Have you ever watched the movie Gattaca? That covers somewhat similar ground in terms of identity concealment and presentation
I think you still would have been able to pull that off with the additional line breaks.
That way you'd get an effect kind of like how I've done the paragraph breaks in this post.
So there are no fully immortal women in the Highlander universe?
Oh, I see. I had thought you were referring to someone from the Highlander universe rather than one of the DS9 Augments.
I wonder why Alix wasn't sent to counseling or treatment to stop her behavior? I can't imagine their parents--or Marcus himself--being pleased with what was going on. Why did they just "tolerate" it? Was it fear of exposure to legal trouble? Or did they know they had the immortality gene and could be exposed by seeking treatment?
I see. It does still seem like a rather disturbed thing to do given the extreme costs of being wrong. But it's good to know she won't go all poltergeist on the crew.
Yeah, I saw Gattaca. At least it's fortunate that humanity is expected rather than perfection--much easier target to hit! But yeah, I imagine some of the ways he avoids attracting notice will show up in other works.
Some of it isn't "fake," though, especially when it comes to cultural upbringing. He has known no other homeworld than Earth. It's unknown whether the "egg" he came from (or whatever the structure is) originated on Earth or Devidia, but the Devidians' intentions seem to have been to outright colonize Earth as a feeding ground, and so presumably that "egg" was formed in 1893.
The Enterprise crew's intervention in the past happened so quickly that it resulted in the creche (which was kept some distance away from the area of the actual temporal incursion, though still in the city) being left behind. Given the passage of so much time, Alyosha was the only viable one left by the time the place was discovered in 2355 or so. So until the discovery was made in 2368, he knew nothing about his own species aside from what was known about him, and everything he'd done had been with the goal of fitting in where and with whom he felt at home: on Earth, in human society.
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You shouldn't feel inadequate or like a bad writer!
Right off the bat, your sense of humor grabbed my attention. Mariachi hunt? War banjo? My goodness, how did this program ever come about?
I should've known that there was going to be a punchline at the end--but it took me by surprise seeing him have a hatching day party! Honestly, that guy took it even worse than Worf did in "Parallels," to have a birthday party!
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I'm with Gulberat. I love your story. Your sense of humour really does appeal to me.
And I think I have to award you something for having the best line to appear in any Literary Challenge...
"In the best traditions of Starfleet, I have decided that the entire command structure of this vessel will accompany me into whatever dangerous, pan-dimensional time warp has manifested as deck thirteen."
There are indeed, in this case, it was simply a case of the genetic re-sequencing unintentionally disturbing the relevant sequence which would create the immortal effect. A bit of writer's licence
No, I thought the results of the DS-9 Augments were a good enough example of why the procedures are illegal (In Alix's case, it may have been allowed because it was correcting accidental genetic damage, and no physical or mental enhancements, 'just' a change of gender...)
Well, I've seen enough Jerry Springer and the like to know that some strange things can happen
I would imagine that although it might be detectable, it might be a policy that it not be revealed to people for fear of suicides...
I agree, it is a somewhat extreme action to take, but if able to see one's own twin suddenly and unquestionably immortal, I can see why someone who wasn't necessarily 'firing on all thrusters' taking the chance...
Totally see what you're meaning, and indeed, cultural upbringing would play considerably more of a part than genetics, like Worf, who's behavior was not really 'as Klingon', as those raised in the Empire.
Indeed, I really like the idea of Alyosha's as a character, and with the Devidians having been such an unexplored race, you certainly have a broad canvas to work on
In Khas' case, it's less about being the center of attention and more about being stuffed in a room with a bunch of hooting, filthy primates who will keep touching him with their grubby meat-hands. And, being captain, he must allow it and pretend that he finds the gesture meaningful.
I never understood why the away teams tended to consist of "all the guys who know how to run a ship" and, maybe, "a guy who can die to underline how dangerous away missions can be". Don't they have a few annoying ensigns and non-critical crewmen they could assign to those things? Seriously, the Enterprise was always, like, one transporter accident away from leaving Wesley Crusher or Guinan in charge of the ship.
QFT ... all of it.
The back-and-forth discussion above has been VERY enlightening to read for me as well.
On a psychological level, perhaps the extreme genetic closeness between the two meant it was a bit of a narcissistic thing on Marcus' part?
Yeah...definitely not arguing that. I was just explaining why I had thought she was even more nuts than she really was.
I never understood why we didn't see more evidence of human influence on Worf. There should've been at least something, unless he deliberately played ignorant of human customs. BTW, he should, specifically, have shown at least some influence of Belorussian culture. Even a little reference or vocabulary word here and there would've helped to make that backstory feel less tacked-on.
The difference between Alyosha and a "native-raised" Devidian is much greater. I would imagine young Devidians are taught to ignore the terror of their victims. There's a telling line in "Time's Arrow" where it was apparently so bad that Troi is able to feel an aftershock of the victims' fear even though their life force has been completely consumed already. That made me think that the process was a) deeply distressing or painful to the victim and b) the victims felt their attackers' malevolence and hunger.
(That's also why--besides the fact that I had a mutiny to prevent!--that I allowed the victims to feel Alyosha's emotions as he fought to bring them back.)
They probably view it from the same moral standpoint as when you raise a child on a farm and teach him or her to accept the slaughter of livestock. (Of course to many humans there's a big difference between livestock and another human being, but the point remains.) When Alyosha accidentally killed his caretaker as a child, no one had ever taught him that, so he reacted from a "natural" conscience and it absolutely shook him to the core.
Believe me, you did fine!
LOL, yikes. Am I right that Khas is an insectoid of some sort?
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I liked it the first time, but the re-write really polished things, and it's a really good entry
Khas could be described as an anthropo-arachnoid. He's about what I'd imagine you'd get if a Xenomorph and an accountant had a baby and then had that baby join Starfleet.
I think if it had been a longer piece, I might indeed have had the interactions with the modern crew taking more sinister turns, but mostly, I just wanted to reinforce that the haunting had been a genuine experience
Worf made a comment in DS-9 about how he had accidentally killed another child while playing soccer, so I think as a child, he may indeed have participated more in Human culture, but become more withdrawn after that incident. The episode of TNG where they found the other Klingons showed just how separated from Klingon culture Worf truly was. If anything, Sisko embraced the Klingon lifestyle much more than Worf ever did
It could be, that Devidians are somewhat like Vampires when it comes to learning to ignore the terror of their victims. I often wondered if a Vampire's 'lack of a soul', was what enabled them to feed without feeling sympathy for their victims. You're definitely going to have to post up more of Alyosha's escapades, I'd love to read them
:eek:
This is warping my ability to comprehend.
Well, there comes a time in every accountant's life where having a crusty, disconsolate baby with a ravening space monster is simply the most fiscally responsible thing to do. I know what you're thinking: "Who would even want to have a baby with an accountant?" But the answer to that is pretty straightforward: Aliens.
I hope that explains everything satisfactorily.
I'm going to get a beer from the ramifications of this discussion.
Yeah, especially since "normally" GSA occurs when the siblings were not raised together (and therefore the Westermarck effect didn't prevent the attraction).
Not so sure about Sisko, but it might well be arguable that Curzon and Jadzia Dax were more into the "modern" Klingon culture than Worf was.
And yeah, I was definitely thinking about the soccer incident that Worf had. But it strikes me that he seems ignorant of human culture to the point of not even knowing the basics that you couldn't help seeing if you were watching TV, or the 24th-century equivalent thereof.
Quite possibly. Then again, plain old human psychology is capable of some pretty serious extremes on its own (think of the Milgram and Stanford Prison Experiments! :eek: ). Even regular people, if not specifically educated to watch for it, are subject to dangerous and even cruel cognitive biases. That's part of why I decided to go with the explanation of it being a learned behavior rather than some sort of genetic inability to emote or feel sympathy. There's a whole evolutionary explanation I've been coming up with, but I won't post it here because it would take up way too much room.
[quote[You're definitely going to have to post up more of Alyosha's escapades, I'd love to read th]m
Thanks! Hopefully the next prompts will inspire me. Exploring the fallout of this incident is definitely something I would do, given the opportunity.
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Dax was definitely into Klingon culture, and 'got it' more than Worf ever did. As for Sisko, I was thinking of the episode where they had to go undercover as Klingons at some event to assassinate Gowron, and Sisko was able to really 'get into character'
I do see what you mean, I'm just wondering if some of that wasn't simply feigned behavior and deliberate cultural rejection, so no one could doubt his Klingon Credentials, rather than a genuine ignorance
That's very true, and definitely makes sense that you went with that route. The explanation sounds fantastic, it would be great to read it
You're very welcome, and likewise, thanks for your feedback on my own entry, it's very much appreciated, I'll look forwards to seeing what entries future challenges inspire you to create
I completely understand and agree with you here. That's one of the reasons I find it such a brilliant line
Could be. It would certainly be quite the irony if (assuming he knew where Worf was raised) Alyosha went up to Worf speaking Russian and expecting Worf to be interested in talking about things from that part of the world. Worf would be none the wiser about the irony, of course, but it would be rather funny.
Still fine-tuning it, so it's not quite ready for prime time yet.
You're most welcome.
BTW, I am not sure if it works when I send a PM on this board. Did you receive the one I sent you? If not, I could try in-game mail instead.
Christian Gaming Community Fleets--Faith, Fun, and Fellowship! See the website and PM for more. :-)
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Cool
I didn't think PMs worked on here either, but I got the message and have replied
Christian Gaming Community Fleets--Faith, Fun, and Fellowship! See the website and PM for more. :-)
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