And then there was this guy, let's call him the Grand Vizier.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
just like him, huh?
and just for the record...if the nebula guy was making smart use of TBRs and grav wells and listening to advice and orders, you really shouldn't be calling him nooblet...noobs are the ones who know nothing about a game, think they do and refuse to take any advice or suggestions on how to improve or do a mission right to keep from TRIBBLE everyone else over
calling someone that who actually isn't is extremely insulting
A normie goes "Oh, what's this?"
An otaku goes "UwU, what's this?"
A furry goes "OwO, what's this?"
A werewolf goes "Awoo, what's this?"
"It's nothing personal, I just don't feel like I've gotten to know a person until I've sniffed their crotch." "We said 'no' to Mr. Curiosity. We're not home. Curiosity is not welcome, it is not to be invited in. Curiosity...is bad. It gets you in trouble, it gets you killed, and more importantly...it makes you poor!"
Passion and Serenity are one.
I gain power by understanding both.
In the chaos of their battle, I bring order.
I am a shadow, darkness born from light.
The Force is united within me.
and just for the record...if the nebula guy was making smart use of TBRs and grav wells and listening to advice and orders, you really shouldn't be calling him nooblet...noobs are the ones who know nothing about a game, think they do and refuse to take any advice or suggestions on how to improve or do a mission right to keep from TRIBBLE everyone else over
Point, that...
He DID play injury jockey and TBR Donatra right into my wing, though. And his ship was a skittle boat that was blowing up about twice a minute.
He did listen, though. The REAL n00b was Captain DPS the rainbow Scimitard man. Nebula guy had some n00b or at least newbie qualities, but he wasn't a total loser.
And shadowfang, DPS Lord was like the Vizier with ten times the profanity, a metric ton of casual abusiveness, and much less actual effectiveness.
I warp in and see:
Me (10k DPS DHCmitard)
Thing 1 (Ar'kif retrofit, non-fleet I think)
Thing 2 (D'derpidex retrofit, also non-fleet I think)
Torp Spam (Defiant retro)
USS Enterprisse (yeah, that was what it was actually called, sci oddy with a sci captain and rainbow cannons)
Torp spam says he has the Kang. Thing 1 says RML, I'm leery but I have a Scimitard so what the hell.
USS Enterprisse goes straight for the cube and takes an torp to the face; I don't know what build he's running but he blows instantly, full shields and hull, doesn't look like a high yield torp either. Thing 1 is a beam boat. Thing 2 has DHCs. Both are rainbow boats.
I know this is going nowhere fast, so I decide to help Torp Spam with the Kang. He's sitting on the Kang and shooting torps slowly at swarming birds of prey.
I tell him to go help on the right as I melt the BOPs. He whines and then blows up from something, not sure what.
Raptors spawn; despite terrible DPS, thing 1 and Thing 2 have taken down the probes. I pop EM and go beast mode.
I leave the two stooges and the oddy to fight off stuff on the right, and blow the other two negh'vars as torp spam respawns. A raptor gets through and optional is lost. I save the Kang, tell torp spam to go help on the right and then middle NOW, he grumbles and does it.
Torp spam farts rainbow torps, the Stooges alternately rainbow and TRIBBLE skittles, and the oddy farts skittles. Somehow, after the oddy and thing 1 die, they beat it. I'm slowly getting overwhelmed.
Negh'vars are coming now, second cube is being fired at and all the probes on it are finally down. Oddy is an injury jockey as is torp spam, thing 2 is in respawn hell.
I fight off the Negh'vars, barely, but both I and the Kang are on low health and more waves are coming. Finally the cube blows.
I prepare myself for inevitable death, popping GDF. The spawns come. The stooges shoot at probes and torp spam dies along with the oddy.
I finally die from a lucky crit. I respawn, fly back in, and save the Kang at 1% health, then use all of my heals on it. So it's on about 5%.
The final cube blows at last, I mop up the spawns, and the carrier comes in.
Everybody else shoots the bops, oddy and defiant die instantly. Ar'kif dies next and his core breach blows d'derpidex. I end up soloing the carrier.
A normie goes "Oh, what's this?"
An otaku goes "UwU, what's this?"
A furry goes "OwO, what's this?"
A werewolf goes "Awoo, what's this?"
"It's nothing personal, I just don't feel like I've gotten to know a person until I've sniffed their crotch." "We said 'no' to Mr. Curiosity. We're not home. Curiosity is not welcome, it is not to be invited in. Curiosity...is bad. It gets you in trouble, it gets you killed, and more importantly...it makes you poor!"
Passion and Serenity are one.
I gain power by understanding both.
In the chaos of their battle, I bring order.
I am a shadow, darkness born from light.
The Force is united within me.
A normie goes "Oh, what's this?"
An otaku goes "UwU, what's this?"
A furry goes "OwO, what's this?"
A werewolf goes "Awoo, what's this?"
"It's nothing personal, I just don't feel like I've gotten to know a person until I've sniffed their crotch." "We said 'no' to Mr. Curiosity. We're not home. Curiosity is not welcome, it is not to be invited in. Curiosity...is bad. It gets you in trouble, it gets you killed, and more importantly...it makes you poor!"
Passion and Serenity are one.
I gain power by understanding both.
In the chaos of their battle, I bring order.
I am a shadow, darkness born from light.
The Force is united within me.
Most common repeated pug mission mistakes I see daily.
CSE: Team either splits up with 1 covering center cube, and 1 covering left cube, last 3 go for right cube. Mostly 1-3 people engaging cubes die frequently, left/middle/right don't kill off bops allowing them to pound kang into submission. Generators destroyed (usually tops first for some reason) out comes Neg & Raptor, more deaths from people who cannot handle a single Raptor, more bops slip by. First Cube down finally, people who wouldn't take care of bops, allow Raptors to slip by, Raptors eradicate Kang, mission failed! This is providing someone doesn't sit afk at starting line, or not re-spawn till mission is over, or boss comes out, etc.
ISE: Team eliminates Cube & spheres, all (or most) of team engages left cube (otherwise they engage generators & not cube), poof either a generator first or cube gone, time to focus on gens (provided someone didn't destroy one before cube), 1 or more gens gone, out comes spheres, people lose common sense and focus on spheres & not the transformer, or simply use TBR or GW, and cause nanite spheres to get closer to transformer (not always, but happens frequently enough), while this is going on, 1 kirk strutting moron decides tackling right side alone killing a generator, thus bringing out spheres on that side. After long lengthy mop up with people constantly shooting impervious gate & dying during entire scenario, finally able to pound on gate, watch people park and die with this, watch kirk try to solo Tac Cube, watch these people constantly pop, watch their injuries rack up (provided they didn't enter with tons to begin with), Mission finally over! This is provided someone doesn't sit afk at the starting line, or hide afk under the SB, or simply not re-spawn will mission is over, etc.
KASE: Team eliminates Tac Cube, people wander around wondering where to go, some go right, some go left. People forget to bother with probes, people kill generators while dying to gate for being to close, out comes cube, people cannot tackle cube and die, sometimes a lot, or simply ignore it along with probes, and continue killing generators. Finally all generators are gone, by this time optional failed long ago, cubes finally gone. Plenty of pounding on transformers, people getting killed by gate being to close while pounding on transformers, more probes getting by. Finally all gens/trans/cubes gone, time to pound on gate, watch people get killed by gate, watch people allow probes by while being killed by spheres, finally gates are destroyed. Boss comes out, boss cloaks often due to people causing it (not always a bad thing here, but annoying waiting for Donatra to un-cloak), people pushing Donatra away from team fire/GW's/TR's/etc. with moronic use of TBR's, finally Donatra destroyed. This is provided someone doesn't sit afk at the starting line, or not re-spawn till mission is over, or till boss comes out, or keeps flying off into nowhere, etc.
This is my typical experience, and happens daily!
And doesn't even begin to touch other STF's, nor ground ones for that matter.
Me in my Avenger, a Kar'fi, a BoP, a raptor of some sort, and a rainbow beam oddy who thought he was Kirk.
Despite Captain Rainbow's best efforts, we finished in 6 minutes with optional. That Kar'fi had sweet DPS and elite pets, and the BOP was good at staying flanked and ambushing.
The Raptor was OK, nothing special but nothing stupid either.
Highlight was Captain Rainbow typing in chat for us to stay away from the cube as he soloed it (we were about to blow the gate); something about him being a really good tank with absurd DPS.
Guess how long he lasted, and how much damage he dealt?
Answer: He was one-shot by a high yield plasma torp as he was typing his little boast. Full shields, full hull. 1-shot.
To those who are worried about my purported masochism: Nah, I've been in PUGs with the finest of Dental trolls and laughed at their antics. Stupidity is no longer painful for me.
And Shadowfang, I am a different person from Grand Vizier worffan101...but if you're really confusing the Ba'al joke with reality, I can go get Jade and tell her you went feral again and urinated on her new chair.
Me in my Avenger, a Kar'fi, a BoP, a raptor of some sort, and a rainbow beam oddy who thought he was Kirk.
Despite Captain Rainbow's best efforts, we finished in 6 minutes with optional. That Kar'fi had sweet DPS and elite pets, and the BOP was good at staying flanked and ambushing.
The Raptor was OK, nothing special but nothing stupid either.
Highlight was Captain Rainbow typing in chat for us to stay away from the cube as he soloed it (we were about to blow the gate); something about him being a really good tank with absurd DPS.
Guess how long he lasted, and how much damage he dealt?
Answer: He was one-shot by a high yield plasma torp as he was typing his little boast. Full shields, full hull. 1-shot.
To those who are worried about my purported masochism: Nah, I've been in PUGs with the finest of Dental trolls and laughed at their antics. Stupidity is no longer painful for me.
And Shadowfang, I am a different person from Grand Vizier worffan101...but if you're really confusing the Ba'al joke with reality, I can go get Jade and tell her you went feral again and urinated on her new chair.
would that be before or AFTER you blew it up with a bazooka?
A normie goes "Oh, what's this?"
An otaku goes "UwU, what's this?"
A furry goes "OwO, what's this?"
A werewolf goes "Awoo, what's this?"
"It's nothing personal, I just don't feel like I've gotten to know a person until I've sniffed their crotch." "We said 'no' to Mr. Curiosity. We're not home. Curiosity is not welcome, it is not to be invited in. Curiosity...is bad. It gets you in trouble, it gets you killed, and more importantly...it makes you poor!"
Passion and Serenity are one.
I gain power by understanding both.
In the chaos of their battle, I bring order.
I am a shadow, darkness born from light.
The Force is united within me.
no. thank you. there have been more hands on you than.. than on a handle in the subway
(OOC: I have absolutely no idea how to respond to that...let's leave it at that and get back to humorous STF stories before the mods hammer the thread, eh?)
I so wish I hit a PUG with you. Just to see if I hit on the noob or competent side of the meter. Compared to what you wrote here today, most of my runs are cakewalks.
Praise Ba'al you take the fools for us.
Originally Posted by pwlaughingtrendy
Network engineers are not ship designers.
Nor should they be. Their ships would look weird.
Me (Scimitard, changed builds to parse about 15k)
"Joe" (Xindi carrier)
"Jim" (Tal Shiar destroyer)
"Bob" (Bugship)
"Freddy" (Avenger)
Sweet, I think. Lots of firepower and a bit of CC. We'll crush this.
We go for the cube. I open fire with an epic alpha that melts it before CRF 3 has ended. Warning sign #1 is when Joe explodes from a sphere. "No worries", I think. "He must've caught an invisatorp to a weak shield facing".
Then Jim and Freddy veer right as Bob and I go left.
OK. I type in chat for Joe to handle spheres while we try to do two sides at once.
Haha, no.
Warning sign #1 is that Bob is a rainbow beam boat, and let me just say what a TREMENDOUS waste that is on a bugship.
I kill the cube while Bob shoots at the TRANSFORMER.
OK, so Bob is a n00b, and doesn't respond when I tell him to stop doing that. Fine, we can 4-man this, I used to parse 15k on this build even with a rubbish team.
Then I see that Joe, Jim, and Freddy are still working on their cube--or rather Jim and Freddy are while Joe shoots at a generator.
As I watch, Jim gets killed by the cube.
Joe's got rainbow beams and what I think are type 8 shuttles, maybe dan00bs. Jim has mines and torps, all different types. Freddy has rainbow turrets, from what I can see.
Wonderful.
So I resign myself to the inevitable, sit in front of the gate, and CRF spheres into oblivion while the Four Stooges merrily pewpew away. Joe, Jim, and Freddy finally kill their transformer after about 6 minutes (don't know how they managed that). They lumber over to where Bob has finally gotten a clue (or more likely gotten bored) and killed 2 generators. I am still nuking spheres.
Second transformer dies in 3 minutes because 2 gens were already down. The tac cube spawns on my *ss and promptly spits an instatorp at me. I survive, barely.
EM plus heals plus buff again and I hail death upon the gate as the cube nukes everyone else one by one. From what I can tell nobody's healing injuries.
The Four Stooges manage to distract the cube with their swift deaths, and I finally manage to kill the gate after 2 minutes of grinding. I'm nervous now, we're getting short on time.
CRF, THY, draw aggro, prep heals, GDF, go heals, try not to die.
I get it to 30% before I finally blow. Repair, respawn (3 of the 4 Stooges die in this time), rush back in before the wipe resets the cube.
Cloak, buff, decloak, CRF, THY, heal, buff, kill.
I win.
The Stooges pat themselves on the back and talk about how great they are. I post a parse. Me--10k. Joe--3k. Jim--2k. Bob--1k. Freddy-2k. I say that Jim did a pretty good job actually making 2k with that build.
They explode at me and say that I'm a lying cheater who hax because I couldn't have gotten those numbers because my DPS is weak and they did all the work and my manly organs are small and limp and I did nothing but shoot spheres like a coward while they died.
I so wish I hit a PUG with you. Just to see if I hit on the noob or competent side of the meter. Compared to what you wrote here today, most of my runs are cakewalks.
Praise Ba'al you take the fools for us.
PM me in-game and I'll run a STF with you.
Honestly, most of my PUGs are reasonably good. Just having a bad run this week.
Everything fine until attacking last tactical borg cube... At around 80% hull for the cube, my connection dropped...
Okay 80% hull health... still got time to log back in so, that's what I tried to do...
Attempt #1 = Error cannot connect to login server...
Attempt #2 = Error cannot connect to login server...
Attempt #3 = Error cannot connect to login server...
Attempt #4... Finally got back in however...
Borg Cube destroyed...
Reward had already been distributed... I got jack and sh!te...
Last remaining teammate leave...
I left...
Queue for another attempt...
60 minute cooldown.
you do realise that the disconnect could also have been your fault, or at your end of the line? Did the rest work?
Since you postet 2 times here, i'd say you actually got some connection probs with some package losses from time to time.
But anyway, discos happen...everybody has experianced it from time to time.
you do realise that the disconnect could also have been your fault, or at your end of the line? Did the rest work?
Since you postet 2 times here, i'd say you actually got some connection probs with some package losses from time to time.
But anyway, discos happen...everybody has experianced it from time to time.
No connection problem 'cuz I a had a separate monitor up that I use to moderate an IT forum. It was still up and running when I lost connection to the STO server.
I PUG in in my new Vesta, determined to bring the glory of stacking grav wells to the uninitiated.
Failaxy retrofit, Xindi carrier, freebie patrol escort and ar'kif retro with MK 11 Jem'Hadar set.
We're not rocking the DPS, so my fermion phaser is the most powerful weapon here. I do my best to keep the grav wells back but the optional fails on the second transformer.
Failaxy's sitting by the blown left transformer while I get killed because I'm too close to the gate and says "great job n00btards, you are teh suxorz".
I say "This is why people hate PUGs, no teamwork...oh, and [Failaxy], that's rude." Then I respawn.
He says, "clearly ur mom didnt hit you enough as a kid".
I ignore him and concentrate on nuking the nanites.
He continues, "and if ur dad were better hung mebbe u woldnt be suc a ******"
I blow up from the tac cube, and say "yeah, yeah, and your mom screws algae," thinking that keeping it somewhat humorous will work.
Failaxy says: "ur a f*g an ur momma's a ho who eats d*cks for money"
I fermion the gate, PM the xindi carrier (who's actually doing damage), and say "Ignore the fool and just shoot the gate. We get it down fairly easily while Failaxy sits there like a lump and shoots invective.
Gate blows. Apparently I am a "tranny ho" who is also a TRIBBLE atheist Kenyan Muslim communist Jew who should go back to Mexico and die.
Xindi dude pauses to tell me that he's reported this oaf and we get back to shooting the tac cube, which blows just after I blow from drawing too much aggro.
I say in team chat "And that's how you do it, kids...Also, [Failaxy], you're being a jerk."
Failaxy says "LOL grief an admin will u i going to ban ur account now".
I put him on ignore and leave. Maybe I should've reported him for impersonating a Cryptic employee, but what the hell.
one of these days you're going to have to bring me along...that way, you'll be assured of at least 1 competent player, and possibly end up pushing out 1 ****** in the process
A normie goes "Oh, what's this?"
An otaku goes "UwU, what's this?"
A furry goes "OwO, what's this?"
A werewolf goes "Awoo, what's this?"
"It's nothing personal, I just don't feel like I've gotten to know a person until I've sniffed their crotch." "We said 'no' to Mr. Curiosity. We're not home. Curiosity is not welcome, it is not to be invited in. Curiosity...is bad. It gets you in trouble, it gets you killed, and more importantly...it makes you poor!"
Passion and Serenity are one.
I gain power by understanding both.
In the chaos of their battle, I bring order.
I am a shadow, darkness born from light.
The Force is united within me.
one of these days you're going to have to bring me along...that way, you'll be assured of at least 1 competent player, and possibly end up pushing out 1 ****** in the process
Definitely. I'll bring my DHCmitard with its gimped build so it isn't too easy.
Oh, and Shadowfang...ISE attracts the worst PUGs, although CSE fails more often and you usually fail the optional in KASE more. Just a quick guide.
I PUG in in my new Vesta, determined to bring the glory of stacking grav wells to the uninitiated.
Failaxy retrofit, Xindi carrier, freebie patrol escort and ar'kif retro with MK 11 Jem'Hadar set.
We're not rocking the DPS, so my fermion phaser is the most powerful weapon here. I do my best to keep the grav wells back but the optional fails on the second transformer.
Failaxy's sitting by the blown left transformer while I get killed because I'm too close to the gate and says "great job n00btards, you are teh suxorz".
I say "This is why people hate PUGs, no teamwork...oh, and [Failaxy], that's rude." Then I respawn.
He says, "clearly ur mom didnt hit you enough as a kid".
I ignore him and concentrate on nuking the nanites.
He continues, "and if ur dad were better hung mebbe u woldnt be suc a ******"
I blow up from the tac cube, and say "yeah, yeah, and your mom screws algae," thinking that keeping it somewhat humorous will work.
Failaxy says: "ur a f*g an ur momma's a ho who eats d*cks for money"
I fermion the gate, PM the xindi carrier (who's actually doing damage), and say "Ignore the fool and just shoot the gate. We get it down fairly easily while Failaxy sits there like a lump and shoots invective.
Gate blows. Apparently I am a "tranny ho" who is also a TRIBBLE atheist Kenyan Muslim communist Jew who should go back to Mexico and die.
Xindi dude pauses to tell me that he's reported this oaf and we get back to shooting the tac cube, which blows just after I blow from drawing too much aggro.
I say in team chat "And that's how you do it, kids...Also, [Failaxy], you're being a jerk."
Failaxy says "LOL grief an admin will u i going to ban ur account now".
I put him on ignore and leave. Maybe I should've reported him for impersonating a Cryptic employee, but what the hell.
Definitely. I'll bring my DHCmitard with its gimped build so it isn't too easy.
Oh, and Shadowfang...ISE attracts the worst PUGs, although CSE fails more often and you usually fail the optional in KASE more. Just a quick guide.
that's because ISE is the quickest and most straightforward to complete, and therefore the go-to for R&D, mark and/or dil farming
i actually did a run several days ago to grab a load of dilithium for zen conversion so i could grab the last T5 fed ship i didn't have before the sale ended...9 characters, 1 CCE, ISE, KASE and CSE each
A normie goes "Oh, what's this?"
An otaku goes "UwU, what's this?"
A furry goes "OwO, what's this?"
A werewolf goes "Awoo, what's this?"
"It's nothing personal, I just don't feel like I've gotten to know a person until I've sniffed their crotch." "We said 'no' to Mr. Curiosity. We're not home. Curiosity is not welcome, it is not to be invited in. Curiosity...is bad. It gets you in trouble, it gets you killed, and more importantly...it makes you poor!"
Passion and Serenity are one.
I gain power by understanding both.
In the chaos of their battle, I bring order.
I am a shadow, darkness born from light.
The Force is united within me.
Comments
just like him, huh?
and just for the record...if the nebula guy was making smart use of TBRs and grav wells and listening to advice and orders, you really shouldn't be calling him nooblet...noobs are the ones who know nothing about a game, think they do and refuse to take any advice or suggestions on how to improve or do a mission right to keep from TRIBBLE everyone else over
calling someone that who actually isn't is extremely insulting
#LegalizeAwoo
A normie goes "Oh, what's this?"
An otaku goes "UwU, what's this?"
A furry goes "OwO, what's this?"
A werewolf goes "Awoo, what's this?"
"It's nothing personal, I just don't feel like I've gotten to know a person until I've sniffed their crotch."
"We said 'no' to Mr. Curiosity. We're not home. Curiosity is not welcome, it is not to be invited in. Curiosity...is bad. It gets you in trouble, it gets you killed, and more importantly...it makes you poor!"
Point, that...
He DID play injury jockey and TBR Donatra right into my wing, though. And his ship was a skittle boat that was blowing up about twice a minute.
He did listen, though. The REAL n00b was Captain DPS the rainbow Scimitard man. Nebula guy had some n00b or at least newbie qualities, but he wasn't a total loser.
And shadowfang, DPS Lord was like the Vizier with ten times the profanity, a metric ton of casual abusiveness, and much less actual effectiveness.
It was almost funny.
I warp in and see:
Me (10k DPS DHCmitard)
Thing 1 (Ar'kif retrofit, non-fleet I think)
Thing 2 (D'derpidex retrofit, also non-fleet I think)
Torp Spam (Defiant retro)
USS Enterprisse (yeah, that was what it was actually called, sci oddy with a sci captain and rainbow cannons)
Torp spam says he has the Kang. Thing 1 says RML, I'm leery but I have a Scimitard so what the hell.
USS Enterprisse goes straight for the cube and takes an torp to the face; I don't know what build he's running but he blows instantly, full shields and hull, doesn't look like a high yield torp either. Thing 1 is a beam boat. Thing 2 has DHCs. Both are rainbow boats.
I know this is going nowhere fast, so I decide to help Torp Spam with the Kang. He's sitting on the Kang and shooting torps slowly at swarming birds of prey.
I tell him to go help on the right as I melt the BOPs. He whines and then blows up from something, not sure what.
Raptors spawn; despite terrible DPS, thing 1 and Thing 2 have taken down the probes. I pop EM and go beast mode.
I leave the two stooges and the oddy to fight off stuff on the right, and blow the other two negh'vars as torp spam respawns. A raptor gets through and optional is lost. I save the Kang, tell torp spam to go help on the right and then middle NOW, he grumbles and does it.
Torp spam farts rainbow torps, the Stooges alternately rainbow and TRIBBLE skittles, and the oddy farts skittles. Somehow, after the oddy and thing 1 die, they beat it. I'm slowly getting overwhelmed.
Negh'vars are coming now, second cube is being fired at and all the probes on it are finally down. Oddy is an injury jockey as is torp spam, thing 2 is in respawn hell.
I fight off the Negh'vars, barely, but both I and the Kang are on low health and more waves are coming. Finally the cube blows.
I prepare myself for inevitable death, popping GDF. The spawns come. The stooges shoot at probes and torp spam dies along with the oddy.
I finally die from a lucky crit. I respawn, fly back in, and save the Kang at 1% health, then use all of my heals on it. So it's on about 5%.
The final cube blows at last, I mop up the spawns, and the carrier comes in.
Everybody else shoots the bops, oddy and defiant die instantly. Ar'kif dies next and his core breach blows d'derpidex. I end up soloing the carrier.
Blargh.
Yeah, today isn't a good day for you and STFs.
Frakking hilarious to read mind...
He has got this self-harm tendencies since.. forever. I am working with him on that but we are making little progress.
#LegalizeAwoo
A normie goes "Oh, what's this?"
An otaku goes "UwU, what's this?"
A furry goes "OwO, what's this?"
A werewolf goes "Awoo, what's this?"
"It's nothing personal, I just don't feel like I've gotten to know a person until I've sniffed their crotch."
"We said 'no' to Mr. Curiosity. We're not home. Curiosity is not welcome, it is not to be invited in. Curiosity...is bad. It gets you in trouble, it gets you killed, and more importantly...it makes you poor!"
mmhmm.. ice is one of the few things that keep him cool. You should try to throw some birds over his head, that will distract him too.
oh, by the way...if he starts getting too pompous, just snap a latex surgical glove within earshot...teehee
#LegalizeAwoo
A normie goes "Oh, what's this?"
An otaku goes "UwU, what's this?"
A furry goes "OwO, what's this?"
A werewolf goes "Awoo, what's this?"
"It's nothing personal, I just don't feel like I've gotten to know a person until I've sniffed their crotch."
"We said 'no' to Mr. Curiosity. We're not home. Curiosity is not welcome, it is not to be invited in. Curiosity...is bad. It gets you in trouble, it gets you killed, and more importantly...it makes you poor!"
I usually snap it ON his ear
But then I need to start to run
CSE: Team either splits up with 1 covering center cube, and 1 covering left cube, last 3 go for right cube. Mostly 1-3 people engaging cubes die frequently, left/middle/right don't kill off bops allowing them to pound kang into submission. Generators destroyed (usually tops first for some reason) out comes Neg & Raptor, more deaths from people who cannot handle a single Raptor, more bops slip by. First Cube down finally, people who wouldn't take care of bops, allow Raptors to slip by, Raptors eradicate Kang, mission failed! This is providing someone doesn't sit afk at starting line, or not re-spawn till mission is over, or boss comes out, etc.
ISE: Team eliminates Cube & spheres, all (or most) of team engages left cube (otherwise they engage generators & not cube), poof either a generator first or cube gone, time to focus on gens (provided someone didn't destroy one before cube), 1 or more gens gone, out comes spheres, people lose common sense and focus on spheres & not the transformer, or simply use TBR or GW, and cause nanite spheres to get closer to transformer (not always, but happens frequently enough), while this is going on, 1 kirk strutting moron decides tackling right side alone killing a generator, thus bringing out spheres on that side. After long lengthy mop up with people constantly shooting impervious gate & dying during entire scenario, finally able to pound on gate, watch people park and die with this, watch kirk try to solo Tac Cube, watch these people constantly pop, watch their injuries rack up (provided they didn't enter with tons to begin with), Mission finally over! This is provided someone doesn't sit afk at the starting line, or hide afk under the SB, or simply not re-spawn will mission is over, etc.
KASE: Team eliminates Tac Cube, people wander around wondering where to go, some go right, some go left. People forget to bother with probes, people kill generators while dying to gate for being to close, out comes cube, people cannot tackle cube and die, sometimes a lot, or simply ignore it along with probes, and continue killing generators. Finally all generators are gone, by this time optional failed long ago, cubes finally gone. Plenty of pounding on transformers, people getting killed by gate being to close while pounding on transformers, more probes getting by. Finally all gens/trans/cubes gone, time to pound on gate, watch people get killed by gate, watch people allow probes by while being killed by spheres, finally gates are destroyed. Boss comes out, boss cloaks often due to people causing it (not always a bad thing here, but annoying waiting for Donatra to un-cloak), people pushing Donatra away from team fire/GW's/TR's/etc. with moronic use of TBR's, finally Donatra destroyed. This is provided someone doesn't sit afk at the starting line, or not re-spawn till mission is over, or till boss comes out, or keeps flying off into nowhere, etc.
This is my typical experience, and happens daily!
And doesn't even begin to touch other STF's, nor ground ones for that matter.
Praetor of the -RTS- Romulan Tal Shiar fleet!
Me in my Avenger, a Kar'fi, a BoP, a raptor of some sort, and a rainbow beam oddy who thought he was Kirk.
Despite Captain Rainbow's best efforts, we finished in 6 minutes with optional. That Kar'fi had sweet DPS and elite pets, and the BOP was good at staying flanked and ambushing.
The Raptor was OK, nothing special but nothing stupid either.
Highlight was Captain Rainbow typing in chat for us to stay away from the cube as he soloed it (we were about to blow the gate); something about him being a really good tank with absurd DPS.
Guess how long he lasted, and how much damage he dealt?
Answer: He was one-shot by a high yield plasma torp as he was typing his little boast. Full shields, full hull. 1-shot.
To those who are worried about my purported masochism: Nah, I've been in PUGs with the finest of Dental trolls and laughed at their antics. Stupidity is no longer painful for me.
And Shadowfang, I am a different person from Grand Vizier worffan101...but if you're really confusing the Ba'al joke with reality, I can go get Jade and tell her you went feral again and urinated on her new chair.
#LegalizeAwoo
A normie goes "Oh, what's this?"
An otaku goes "UwU, what's this?"
A furry goes "OwO, what's this?"
A werewolf goes "Awoo, what's this?"
"It's nothing personal, I just don't feel like I've gotten to know a person until I've sniffed their crotch."
"We said 'no' to Mr. Curiosity. We're not home. Curiosity is not welcome, it is not to be invited in. Curiosity...is bad. It gets you in trouble, it gets you killed, and more importantly...it makes you poor!"
After the Vizier's minions repaired it, I think.
I was only worried for your health
But ok, I will never ever say anything or care anymore..
Oh, Manfred, my darling! I didn't mean to worry you!
TAKE ME BACK, DARLING!!! TAKE ME BAAAAAAAACCCK!!!!!!!
no. thank you. there have been more hands on you than.. than on a handle in the subway
(OOC: I have absolutely no idea how to respond to that...let's leave it at that and get back to humorous STF stories before the mods hammer the thread, eh?)
I so wish I hit a PUG with you. Just to see if I hit on the noob or competent side of the meter. Compared to what you wrote here today, most of my runs are cakewalks.
Praise Ba'al you take the fools for us.
Originally Posted by pwlaughingtrendy
Network engineers are not ship designers.
Nor should they be. Their ships would look weird.
Me (Scimitard, changed builds to parse about 15k)
"Joe" (Xindi carrier)
"Jim" (Tal Shiar destroyer)
"Bob" (Bugship)
"Freddy" (Avenger)
Sweet, I think. Lots of firepower and a bit of CC. We'll crush this.
We go for the cube. I open fire with an epic alpha that melts it before CRF 3 has ended. Warning sign #1 is when Joe explodes from a sphere. "No worries", I think. "He must've caught an invisatorp to a weak shield facing".
Then Jim and Freddy veer right as Bob and I go left.
OK. I type in chat for Joe to handle spheres while we try to do two sides at once.
Haha, no.
Warning sign #1 is that Bob is a rainbow beam boat, and let me just say what a TREMENDOUS waste that is on a bugship.
I kill the cube while Bob shoots at the TRANSFORMER.
OK, so Bob is a n00b, and doesn't respond when I tell him to stop doing that. Fine, we can 4-man this, I used to parse 15k on this build even with a rubbish team.
Then I see that Joe, Jim, and Freddy are still working on their cube--or rather Jim and Freddy are while Joe shoots at a generator.
As I watch, Jim gets killed by the cube.
Joe's got rainbow beams and what I think are type 8 shuttles, maybe dan00bs. Jim has mines and torps, all different types. Freddy has rainbow turrets, from what I can see.
Wonderful.
So I resign myself to the inevitable, sit in front of the gate, and CRF spheres into oblivion while the Four Stooges merrily pewpew away. Joe, Jim, and Freddy finally kill their transformer after about 6 minutes (don't know how they managed that). They lumber over to where Bob has finally gotten a clue (or more likely gotten bored) and killed 2 generators. I am still nuking spheres.
Second transformer dies in 3 minutes because 2 gens were already down. The tac cube spawns on my *ss and promptly spits an instatorp at me. I survive, barely.
EM plus heals plus buff again and I hail death upon the gate as the cube nukes everyone else one by one. From what I can tell nobody's healing injuries.
The Four Stooges manage to distract the cube with their swift deaths, and I finally manage to kill the gate after 2 minutes of grinding. I'm nervous now, we're getting short on time.
CRF, THY, draw aggro, prep heals, GDF, go heals, try not to die.
I get it to 30% before I finally blow. Repair, respawn (3 of the 4 Stooges die in this time), rush back in before the wipe resets the cube.
Cloak, buff, decloak, CRF, THY, heal, buff, kill.
I win.
The Stooges pat themselves on the back and talk about how great they are. I post a parse. Me--10k. Joe--3k. Jim--2k. Bob--1k. Freddy-2k. I say that Jim did a pretty good job actually making 2k with that build.
They explode at me and say that I'm a lying cheater who hax because I couldn't have gotten those numbers because my DPS is weak and they did all the work and my manly organs are small and limp and I did nothing but shoot spheres like a coward while they died.
I just leave, without telling them to get a life.
PM me in-game and I'll run a STF with you.
Honestly, most of my PUGs are reasonably good. Just having a bad run this week.
And Hail Ba'al!
ISE...
Everything fine until attacking last tactical borg cube... At around 80% hull for the cube, my connection dropped...
Okay 80% hull health... still got time to log back in so, that's what I tried to do...
Attempt #1 = Error cannot connect to login server...
Attempt #2 = Error cannot connect to login server...
Attempt #3 = Error cannot connect to login server...
Attempt #4... Finally got back in however...
Borg Cube destroyed...
Reward had already been distributed... I got jack and *****...
Last remaining teammate leave...
I left...
Queue for another attempt...
60 minute cooldown.
ISE...
Everything fine until attacking last tactical borg cube... At around 80% hull for the cube, my connection dropped...
Okay 80% hull health... still got time to log back in so, that's what I tried to do...
Attempt #1 = Error cannot connect to login server...
Attempt #2 = Error cannot connect to login server...
Attempt #3 = Error cannot connect to login server...
Attempt #4... Finally got back in however...
Borg Cube destroyed...
Reward had already been distributed... I got jack and sh!te...
Last remaining teammate leave...
I left...
Queue for another attempt...
60 minute cooldown.
you do realise that the disconnect could also have been your fault, or at your end of the line? Did the rest work?
Since you postet 2 times here, i'd say you actually got some connection probs with some package losses from time to time.
But anyway, discos happen...everybody has experianced it from time to time.
No connection problem 'cuz I a had a separate monitor up that I use to moderate an IT forum. It was still up and running when I lost connection to the STO server.
I PUG in in my new Vesta, determined to bring the glory of stacking grav wells to the uninitiated.
Failaxy retrofit, Xindi carrier, freebie patrol escort and ar'kif retro with MK 11 Jem'Hadar set.
We're not rocking the DPS, so my fermion phaser is the most powerful weapon here. I do my best to keep the grav wells back but the optional fails on the second transformer.
Failaxy's sitting by the blown left transformer while I get killed because I'm too close to the gate and says "great job n00btards, you are teh suxorz".
I say "This is why people hate PUGs, no teamwork...oh, and [Failaxy], that's rude." Then I respawn.
He says, "clearly ur mom didnt hit you enough as a kid".
I ignore him and concentrate on nuking the nanites.
He continues, "and if ur dad were better hung mebbe u woldnt be suc a ******"
I blow up from the tac cube, and say "yeah, yeah, and your mom screws algae," thinking that keeping it somewhat humorous will work.
Failaxy says: "ur a f*g an ur momma's a ho who eats d*cks for money"
I fermion the gate, PM the xindi carrier (who's actually doing damage), and say "Ignore the fool and just shoot the gate. We get it down fairly easily while Failaxy sits there like a lump and shoots invective.
Gate blows. Apparently I am a "tranny ho" who is also a TRIBBLE atheist Kenyan Muslim communist Jew who should go back to Mexico and die.
Xindi dude pauses to tell me that he's reported this oaf and we get back to shooting the tac cube, which blows just after I blow from drawing too much aggro.
I say in team chat "And that's how you do it, kids...Also, [Failaxy], you're being a jerk."
Failaxy says "LOL grief an admin will u i going to ban ur account now".
I put him on ignore and leave. Maybe I should've reported him for impersonating a Cryptic employee, but what the hell.
#LegalizeAwoo
A normie goes "Oh, what's this?"
An otaku goes "UwU, what's this?"
A furry goes "OwO, what's this?"
A werewolf goes "Awoo, what's this?"
"It's nothing personal, I just don't feel like I've gotten to know a person until I've sniffed their crotch."
"We said 'no' to Mr. Curiosity. We're not home. Curiosity is not welcome, it is not to be invited in. Curiosity...is bad. It gets you in trouble, it gets you killed, and more importantly...it makes you poor!"
Definitely. I'll bring my DHCmitard with its gimped build so it isn't too easy.
Oh, and Shadowfang...ISE attracts the worst PUGs, although CSE fails more often and you usually fail the optional in KASE more. Just a quick guide.
god damn thats a hot mess
i actually did a run several days ago to grab a load of dilithium for zen conversion so i could grab the last T5 fed ship i didn't have before the sale ended...9 characters, 1 CCE, ISE, KASE and CSE each
out of all that, i only had one bad ISE
#LegalizeAwoo
A normie goes "Oh, what's this?"
An otaku goes "UwU, what's this?"
A furry goes "OwO, what's this?"
A werewolf goes "Awoo, what's this?"
"It's nothing personal, I just don't feel like I've gotten to know a person until I've sniffed their crotch."
"We said 'no' to Mr. Curiosity. We're not home. Curiosity is not welcome, it is not to be invited in. Curiosity...is bad. It gets you in trouble, it gets you killed, and more importantly...it makes you poor!"