Marriage: Change Chi embrace system is immoral, psychological trauma

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dacul
dacul Posts: 9 Arc User
edited February 2010 in General Discussion
Chi embrace system induces psychological trauma to married couples.
You marry a player out of love or not, less important.
Seeing (hearing from others) her carried/kissed by other males or seeing(hearing) him carrying/kissing other women, produces a lot of pain, because even if is only a marriage in a game, is your wife or husband. If you have real feelings for her or him is a lot more worse.

I married her out of love, but with a woman who says she loves me, but has no problem in hurting my feelings by embracing others, her argument being "is part of the game". I don't embrace/carry other women, never did, because I love only her.
Over the months I got on board a lot of trauma and pain a lot of fights and I don't want to end up in hospital (like last year) or in a coffin. I must say it messed me up, but I can't give up on her, after how many sacrifices I've done, efforts I've put and money I've spent.

You, devs don't think only about the money you can make, think about what damage can produce this to our lives.
You need to change this chi system, once married a character should be able to use embrace action(carry and kiss) ONLY with his/her partner.
Change it because is immoral for married people to be able to interact with others than their marriage partner. The message sent to teenagers (and not only) who play this game is also bad.
Post edited by dacul on
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  • PsychicHarpy - Heavens Tear
    PsychicHarpy - Heavens Tear Posts: 269 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    dacul wrote: »
    "is part of the game".
    That is enough said, It's only pixelated characters dude, It's not like she's seeing the guy in real life ( who is likely to be a girl) in real life (or you in real life for that matter) So imo just chill it IS only a game
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    I'm the only Harpy, Who's Psychic and knows all!b:chuckleb:pleased

    Live Life How You wish To Live It.


    I love PWI, Teh Forums, and Konari b:thanks


    Is currently working on Wizzy (imo better than my Psy)b:surrender name: SaphiraGione
  • Sezan - Harshlands
    Sezan - Harshlands Posts: 106 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    If you think this is wrong you need to open your eyes and see the rest of the world. You hardly know the person you marry and yet your going to care if someone picks her up? this is virtual not reality and the message your sending out is "Im a nutcase".

    P,s I hate "pixel lovers" its stupid?
  • Pickle - Harshlands
    Pickle - Harshlands Posts: 27 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    dacul wrote: »
    Chi embrace system induces psychological trauma to married couples.
    You marry a player out of love or not, less important.
    Seeing (hearing from others) her carried/kissed by other males or seeing(hearing) him carrying/kissing other women, produces a lot of pain, because even if is only a marriage in a game, is your wife or husband. If you have real feelings for her or him is a lot more worse.

    I married her out of love, but with a woman who says she loves me, but has no problem in hurting my feelings by embracing others, her argument being "is part of the game". I don't embrace/carry other women, never did, because I love only her.
    Over the months I got on board a lot of trauma and pain a lot of fights and I don't want to end up in hospital (like last year) or in a coffin. I must say it messed me up, but I can't give up on her, after how many sacrifices I've done, efforts I've put and money I've spent.

    You, devs don't think only about the money you can make, think about what damage can produce this to our lives.
    You need to change this chi system, once married a character should be able to use embrace action(carry and kiss) ONLY with his/her partner.
    Change it because is immoral for married people to be able to interact with others than their marriage partner. The message sent to teenagers (and not only) who play this game is also bad.

    I understand your pain, and that the system may be slightly "immoral," but you have to learn to look at it as a not-so-significant thing.

    The system cannot be changed by anyone viewing this thread (including GMs).

    Try talking to your girl and let her know how you feel, that it bothers you. I assume you are both reasonable adults and can discuss your feelings.

    However traumatic your experience, I do not feel that it warrants a change in the game system.
  • Aadi - Lost City
    Aadi - Lost City Posts: 4,449 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    Wait...she's your ingame wife and you got in rl fights over who she embraces...?

    Fights with the other characters or with her? b:puzzled
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    "aadi is a forum ninja, always there, skirting thru the shadows... striking with quick posts while you are distracted by your own" -Alexeno(kin)
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  • mulanrouge
    mulanrouge Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    lol'd irl

    P
    I
    X
    E
    L
    S
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  • WaffleChan - Sanctuary
    WaffleChan - Sanctuary Posts: 2,897 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    this is about as mundane as the guy who tried to sue cbs because watching people eat mice on fear factor made him vomit and trip in it, claiming he had severe head trauma after watching lol... the courts dismissed it and lol'd
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    advice to fledgling archers:
    Going sage is like drunken sex, at first she may look good, but when you wake up the next morning; you'll look at her and go WHAT HAVE I DONE.
  • Sirrobert - Dreamweaver
    Sirrobert - Dreamweaver Posts: 3,395 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    OMFG, this is funny.

    Are you the type of guy who goes nuts and trys to kill someone cause he talked to your girfriend and she hugs her friend?

    Pls, buy some boxing gloves and a big bag of sand, and go try to wack that thing. Stop getting all worked out because your in GAME wife needed chi and coise for the easy way to get that
    9 out of 10 voices in my head say I'm not crazy... the 10th is singing the music of tetris
  • Advice - Lost City
    Advice - Lost City Posts: 41 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    Posts=2 lol obvious troll is obvious
  • dacul
    dacul Posts: 9 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    Actually is the only interaction I can have with her, except skype and I want something to remain special.

    Btw how may of you married and have feelings for your partner?
    Is easy to talk when you did not experienced this.
  • Hunter_PT - Heavens Tear
    Hunter_PT - Heavens Tear Posts: 1,222 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    Obvious troll and if not i hope your not actually being serious.
    Executor Of Reunited ~ Level 3 ~ Level 85+ ~ No Drama, No Pressure Faction.

    Hunter_PT - Cleric 9X, (Active/Main)
    PoisonedTip - Veno 7x (Retired)
    Skeln - Barbarian 4X (Rarely-Active)
    Hunter_The - BM 1X (Rarely-Active)
  • Vivre - Harshlands
    Vivre - Harshlands Posts: 305 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    I heard from Tina who heard from Samantha who saw Tim telling Tom that your wife hugged another man behind orchid temple. He saw some hearts but tongues were most definitely not involved. b:shocked
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    What is this 'res' you speak of? b:cute
  • WaffleChan - Sanctuary
    WaffleChan - Sanctuary Posts: 2,897 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    its just a game, its not cheating if i went to someone and gave them the heart eyes emote if i was with a girl lol.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    advice to fledgling archers:
    Going sage is like drunken sex, at first she may look good, but when you wake up the next morning; you'll look at her and go WHAT HAVE I DONE.
  • Hunter_PT - Heavens Tear
    Hunter_PT - Heavens Tear Posts: 1,222 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    Vivre - Harshlands wrote: »
    I heard from Tina who heard from Samantha who saw Tim telling Tom that your wife hugged another man behind orchid temple. He saw some hearts but tongues were most definitely not involved. b:shocked

    Lmao b:laugh.
    Executor Of Reunited ~ Level 3 ~ Level 85+ ~ No Drama, No Pressure Faction.

    Hunter_PT - Cleric 9X, (Active/Main)
    PoisonedTip - Veno 7x (Retired)
    Skeln - Barbarian 4X (Rarely-Active)
    Hunter_The - BM 1X (Rarely-Active)
  • Biafra - Heavens Tear
    Biafra - Heavens Tear Posts: 58 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    Sezan - Harshlands wrote: »
    If you think this is wrong you need to open your eyes and see the rest of the world. You hardly know the person you marry and yet your going to care if someone picks her up? this is virtual not reality and the message your sending out is "Im a nutcase".

    P,s I hate "pixel lovers" its stupid?

    thank god for that, if this was anything like the movie " Gamer " I would have been dead a long time ago, and all the monsters woul dhave messed with mind, and im pretty sure I wouldnt last as long under water lol.


    anyhow dont worry, it is just part of the game.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    "For on its wing was dark alloy
    And as it fluttered--fell
    An essence--powerful to destroy
    A soul that knew it well."

    Edgar Allen Poe "The Happiest Day"
  • PsychicHarpy - Heavens Tear
    PsychicHarpy - Heavens Tear Posts: 269 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    I married my man (In game and irl)

    I just found out I was pregnant yesterday! b:cuteb:cute (too much info I know)

    Yet he picks up girls all the time for chi, and kisses them as saying thank you. I dun go and get all my panties in a bunch. So you really have no right to get pissy sweetheart Me and my husband Sit RIGHT next to each other while we play PWI and I embrace other males all the damn time lol
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    I'm the only Harpy, Who's Psychic and knows all!b:chuckleb:pleased

    Live Life How You wish To Live It.


    I love PWI, Teh Forums, and Konari b:thanks


    Is currently working on Wizzy (imo better than my Psy)b:surrender name: SaphiraGione
  • dacul
    dacul Posts: 9 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    Sezan - Harshlands wrote: »
    If you think this is wrong you need to open your eyes and see the rest of the world. You hardly know the person you marry and yet your going to care if someone picks her up? this is virtual not reality and the message your sending out is "Im a nutcase".

    P,s I hate "pixel lovers" its stupid?
    True, but I care.
    I've built this relation over months, she is where she is because of me, I've played this game not for me, but more for her, like a couple.
  • Asmodiel - Heavens Tear
    Asmodiel - Heavens Tear Posts: 1,442 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    @Harpy: o.o congratz

    @Lame topic: Let's say you really got feelings and all for that person, then you should also trust that person enough to know that embracing someone else is NOT CHEATING AT ALL . If not, then go on Skype and have a very serious talk with him/her...cuz it's needed.
    "One of the most important factors, not only in military matters but in life as a whole, is ... the ability to direct one's whole energies towards the fulfillment of a particular task." - Field Marshal Erwin Rommel

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Sirrobert - Dreamweaver
    Sirrobert - Dreamweaver Posts: 3,395 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    Seriusly dude, it's called 'carry'.

    Just yesterday, I carryed some low lvl veno who ended up in a high lvl area to etherblade, so she could get back into her own zones.

    Basicly, I hold her for about 15 mins while I was flying. I was mostly chatting with my faction.
    Did I do anything with her? Nope, I was helping her get back into her own zone. She said tnx, and I tped back to arch to pick up my BH
    9 out of 10 voices in my head say I'm not crazy... the 10th is singing the music of tetris
  • dacul
    dacul Posts: 9 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    PsychicHarpy - Heavens Tear wrote: »
    I married my man (In game and irl)

    I just found out I was pregnant yesterday! b:cuteb:cute (too much info I know)

    Yet he picks up girls all the time for chi, and kisses them as saying thank you. I dun go and get all my panties in a bunch. So you really have no right to get pissy sweetheart Me and my husband Sit RIGHT next to each other while we play PWI and I embrace other males all the damn time lol
    Very nice and congratulations for the baby.
    But I'm not in your position, me and her are from 2 different parts of the world.
  • Sezan - Harshlands
    Sezan - Harshlands Posts: 106 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    Well everyone has different opinions I guess, I apologize for being rude.
    Really though, don't take a game serious b:shutup

    I'm just annoyed because of this bug on Hyper EXP b:laugh
  • MANray_ - Sanctuary
    MANray_ - Sanctuary Posts: 2,311 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    Let's actually take this argument seriously for a moment. Much as in irl your wife has every right to embrace (and more...) whoever she pleases. Marriage does not equate ownership of another human being and to expect authorities to enforce such expectations is a backward and degrading practice. In irl only failed states continue to outlaw adultery. A marriage is only significant as a comitment if both parties consider it so, and as much as you have every right to expect fidelity from your partner, she has every right to do whatever she choses with her own body, pixelated or otherwise. Next time marry someone who shares your own values.

    Now, this is a game. If you think your "wife" embracing other people is wrong then you, my friend, are a very shallow person. And embracing comes with benefits as a game mechanic (chi gain) which means there are legitimate ingame reasons to do it.

    Is everyone's choice what they'll have their caracters do, much as it is irl. I for one have never embraced another character since the devs' moral prejudice decided against girl-girl embrace. Any dude that decides to ignore the MAN on my name gets a Lending Hand for a hint...

    Edit; oh, and grats Harpy.
  • dacul
    dacul Posts: 9 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    Asmodiel - Heavens Tear wrote: »
    @Harpy: o.o congratz

    @Lame topic: Let's say you really got feelings and all for that person, then you should also trust that person enough to know that embracing someone else is NOT CHEATING AT ALL . If not, then go on Skype and have a very serious talk with him/her...cuz it's needed.
    Yeah sorry I had to say this out in the open.
    Guess I have to forget her, she is causing me enough pain, not understanding me.
  • Quilue - Sanctuary
    Quilue - Sanctuary Posts: 5,787 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    I wonder if Astypoo gets jealous when i hug Deceptipoo b:question
    Elena Costel: I wash my hands of this affair.
    Legerity: *drags you back* *stains your hands with said affair*
    Elena Costel: Noooo... I don't want to have a dirty affair with Lady Legerity...
    Qui: b:dirty
  • Aadi - Lost City
    Aadi - Lost City Posts: 4,449 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    I wonder what the divorce rate is in PWI b:chuckle
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    "aadi is a forum ninja, always there, skirting thru the shadows... striking with quick posts while you are distracted by your own" -Alexeno(kin)
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    "You live for forums. Like seriously."
  • Skybelle - Sanctuary
    Skybelle - Sanctuary Posts: 595 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    Quilue - Sanctuary wrote: »
    I wonder if Astypoo gets jealous when i hug Deceptipoo b:question

    But you're wearing that white dress. Deceptypoo will rip it to shreds. b:angry
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  • dacul
    dacul Posts: 9 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    MANray_ - Sanctuary wrote: »
    Now, this is a game. If you think your "wife" embracing other people is wrong then you, my friend, are a very shallow person. And embracing comes with benefits as a game mechanic (chi gain) which means there are legitimate ingame reasons to do it.

    Is everyone's choice what they'll have their caracters do, much as it is irl. I for one have never embraced another character since the devs' moral prejudice decided against girl-girl embrace. Any dude that decides to ignore the MAN on my name gets a Lending Hand for a hint...
    Edit; oh, and grats Harpy.
    Doesn't bother me what you say about me. I've been tagged even worse.

    I guess if she would love me like she says, her choice would be to show me she cares about my feelings.
  • Shivalia - Lost City
    Shivalia - Lost City Posts: 883 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    dacul wrote: »
    Doesn't bother me what you say about me. I've been tagged even worse.

    I guess if she would love me like she says, her choice would be to show me she cares about my feelings.

    Then you have to confront HER about it and tell her it hurts your feelings so she can stop or not. If not, then she doesn't care. So there. Don't bring the game into it. Don't tell them to change whatever because YOU are insecure in your relationship and can't speak to the damn girl. Jeesus.

    Edit: Sorry for just being blunt and nasty, but I've had a hell of a day, and this is just so ridiculous. When I saw the post half an hour ago, I couldn't even think up any kind of response because it was just so stupid. Just don't blame the game for your traumas. Blame the girl. I have a long distance relationship as well and never get to see him and he'll barely even come onto the damn game for me when I beg him to. But I don't cry about it or ask them to change this or that in the game so he'll want to come on it or whatever. I talk to him about whatever and we figure it all out. You are more than welcome to come here with life problems and looking for help and advice, but you've just gone to a new level of complaining on this one. And complaining about something only YOU can fix.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Wonderful drawing of Shivalia done by the ever talented Shirrii of Heavens Tear. b:heart Much love to you forever!
  • Hunter_PT - Heavens Tear
    Hunter_PT - Heavens Tear Posts: 1,222 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    Shivalia - Lost City wrote: »
    Then you have to confront HER about it and tell her it hurts your feelings so she can stop or not. If not, then she doesn't care. So there. Don't bring the game into it. Don't tell them to change whatever because YOU are insecure in your relationship and can't speak to the damn girl. Jeesus.

    +1 - Its your insecurity that is the issue and besides you don't own the poor girl.
    Executor Of Reunited ~ Level 3 ~ Level 85+ ~ No Drama, No Pressure Faction.

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  • dacul
    dacul Posts: 9 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    Shivalia - Lost City wrote: »
    Then you have to confront HER about it and tell her it hurts your feelings so she can stop or not. If not, then she doesn't care. So there. Don't bring the game into it. Don't tell them to change whatever because YOU are insecure in your relationship and can't speak to the damn girl. Jeesus.
    I talked, she doesn't understand, I've posted this on forum, because I thought there are others in my position also and I wanted to hear people's opinions.
  • Shivalia - Lost City
    Shivalia - Lost City Posts: 883 Arc User
    edited February 2010
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    dacul wrote: »
    I talked, she doesn't understand, I've posted this on forum, because I thought there are others in my position also and I wanted to hear people's opinions.

    If she doesn't understand, then she's not for you. And you didn't post here because you wanted opinions. You posted to try and get them to change the game. (also, last post is edited if you wanted to read my little bit of an apology. Not much of one, but a little)

    Another edit: And the more I think of this and re-read the original post, the worse it gets. You aren't forced to play this game. You could go to some other game where there is no option to 'embrace' or whatever. And 'you shouldn't be able to interact with anyone other than your marriage partner.' .....Really? So. Just because I'll be married some day, I can never hug a friend of mine. I can't shake anyone's hand or give my father a kiss? I can't have my friend hug me to comfort me when I'm upset because it will cause mental trauma to my husband? Gotta tell you, my friend, I wouldn't touch a person like you in a million years. You're just too messed up to start with. I need a man who can take care of himself. No need to even bother mentioning taking care of me. You can't even keep your own mind in check, there's no way you'd be able to care for anyone else properly.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Wonderful drawing of Shivalia done by the ever talented Shirrii of Heavens Tear. b:heart Much love to you forever!
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