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Forums > Home› Star Trek Online General Discussion

I have a theory ...

resoundingenvoyresoundingenvoy Member Posts: 439
edited August 2012 in Star Trek Online General Discussion
Stay with me if you've heard it before I've told it a few times before. :)

The first? Have you ever noticed 90% of Starfleet's starbase security is all caitian? So whenever you turn contraband over your more then likely handing it off to a cat. So, my theory is that the "contraband" is actually catnip! Which must make for some very interesting unions or off-hours ...

The second? When Katheryn Janeway infected the borg queen, and brought low the borg? It wasn't a "virus". She gave them a lifetime subscription to a MMO. The borg are coming back in force now because they got banned for collectively sharing accounts! Now they're back, and real objective is to assimilate another a new MMO!

Those are my theories. What are yours?
Post edited by resoundingenvoy on
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Comments

  • UnknownUnknown
    edited July 2012
    This content has been removed.
  • atomicfbatomicfb Member Posts: 100 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    The reason most of Starfleet security, or security officers as bases etc are Caitian is because Star fleet was going to outsource it to the Ferengi and the Vulcans considered that to be illogical so the Caitians got the job.


    (I play Caitians mostly, so this is in good humor.)
  • tharkantharkan Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    My theory is that too many people here are confusing Caitians for Khajiit (and are probably are on Skooma).
  • resoundingenvoyresoundingenvoy Member Posts: 439
    edited July 2012
    I tell two clean jokes (ok, the catnip is iffy) and get bitten for because I made someone is feel defensive, and ignored on the second? Not a polite chuckle, not a grown, or just ignored? I get chewed on for it?

    Maybe I should have made it about murder, disease, and misery?

    I love you people too!
  • qjuniorqjunior Member Posts: 2,023 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    Insane stuff like this clearly belongs in Ten Forward. :D
  • adampdreschadampdresch Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    I thought the catnip comment was funny lol
  • commadorebobcommadorebob Member Posts: 1,223 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    First theory: Catians are an inferior lifeforms. If you Starfleet types want them to be their security, fine.

    Second theory: That was Janeway's failed attempt to control the collective.
    "If you have never used Cello, I'm not interested in your browser opinion."
    ___________________________
    In game: Commadore_Bob; Joined Jul 2009; That post count + 20,000
  • anazondaanazonda Member Posts: 8,399 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    STO catnip
    Don't look silly... Don't call it the "Z-Store/Zen Store"...
    pwebranflakes wrote: »
    Let me put the rumors to rest: it's definitely still the C-Store (Cryptic Store) It just takes ZEN.
    Like Duty Officers? Support effords to gather ideas
  • zadamazadama Member Posts: 78 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    tharkan wrote: »
    My theory is that too many people here are confusing Caitians for Khajiit (and are probably are on Skooma).

    I read one of the Lost Era novels the other day, and it was talking about a Caitian colony. They were a nomadic people who lived in the desert, herding animals - and I thought for a moment that I'd stepped into Elsweyr by mistake;)
  • angelus214angelus214 Member Posts: 77 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    My theory is that there are in fact 4 lights... but its just a theory
    Untitled_1.jpg

    Executive Officer of Alpha Squadron
  • tharkantharkan Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    Well, now for my serious theory.

    Caitians make up the majority of security officers due to their superior senses. A Catian's sense of smell and hearing is greater than that of most species in the Federation, if not better than all species in the Federation. That way, they can detect intruders that could find ways to mask their presence to a tricorder and otherwise to undetected.
  • lordfuzunlordfuzun Member Posts: 54 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    fulleatherjacket wrote: »
    My theory:

    Caitians hate it when humans assume that the'yre just enormous bipedal cats rather than a unique alien species. Being likened to earth cats is despised as racist by all Caitians. If you were to ask a Caitian if he wanted some catnip, he'd ask you if you also like to keep black people locked in the ape enclosure in zoos.

    Quite right. Catnip does nothing for/to Caitians. It's Honeysuckle which does it. It drives crazy get some when they get wind of it. :D
  • resoundingenvoyresoundingenvoy Member Posts: 439
    edited July 2012
    I have a theory ...

    Ever notice how people can blaster grenade and mortar craters in the academy ground during a event and the staff doesn't seem to care? I think star-fleet cadets discipline is a sham! You know there have to be some really wild pranks going on for the staff not to be phased by a war zone.

    (Also they must have some grade 'A' janitors.)
  • resoundingenvoyresoundingenvoy Member Posts: 439
    edited July 2012
    They must also have some really great roofers because you can call down a orbital strike ... from indoors ... and it doesn't seem to matter.

    Maybe they barrow from the temporal mechanics department?
  • resoundingenvoyresoundingenvoy Member Posts: 439
    edited July 2012
    Ah! Triple post. Stop feeding the troll. ... oh wait.

    I have a theory ...

    The borg have developed a new sub-system to device power between. They have weapons, shields, engines, auxiliary, and archive research. Do you remember when they first attack Wolf 359? A single cube destroyed a entire fleet save one ship. Now, a cube that masses 20 or 100 times more then the largest star fleet ship can now be killed by that one ship if it's well equipped.

    I think between 2367 (The battle of Wolf 359) and now they have discover the ancient earth archives. All of them now divert large sums of power to recovering ancient YouTube videos ...
  • dkeith2011dkeith2011 Member Posts: 595 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    It could be bunnies.
  • dunespicedunespice Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    Well, Starfleet had to deal with Spacedock's rat infestation somehow... ;)
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • admrenlarreckadmrenlarreck Member Posts: 2,041 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    anazonda wrote: »
    STO catnip



    I had a DOFF mission once, Provide a Gift to Caitian Diplomats. All they wanted was the Nepata Leaves. Now we call them Catnip in my fleet!
    fayhers_starfleet.jpg


    Fleet leader Nova Elite

    Fleet Leader House of Nova elite
    @ren_larreck
  • husnock1husnock1 Member Posts: 90 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    dkeith2011 wrote: »
    It could be bunnies.

    I blame the parents.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • radkipradkip Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    Think about it.

    If you had to go up against a human security guard, or a cat security guard with sharp claws, which would you rather fight against? The human. That's why most of the security are Caitians, because humans make terrible security guards.

    Also, they breed like rabbits throughout the galaxy. DEY TERK ER JERBS
    Joined: January 2010

    Fanfiction! ZOMG! Read it now!
    kate-wintersbite.deviantart.com/art/0x01-Treachery-293641403
  • resoundingenvoyresoundingenvoy Member Posts: 439
    edited July 2012
    I have a theory ...

    Anyone ever seen the old 'Ferengi Lock-boxes' appear after destroying mines? I think the real reason they appear there is a irate captain getting creative when disposing of his old boxes. I think the real reason is their actually full of high-grade packing material or things people often mistake for firewood.
  • kimmerakimmera Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    dkeith2011 wrote: »
    It could be bunnies.

    Or maybe midgets...
  • dragonmirescdragonmiresc Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    I have a theory...

    As to why are all the Caitian ships so shiny?

    "Are you tired of going through all that turtle wax to keep your Caitian Carrier or Stalker looking shinies for all the ladies. For just three easy payments of bits of string (yarn only) you can have a lick-clean Caitian crew do the work for you."

    -Standard rates may apply, shipping and handling not included, NO REFUNDS.

    **Not responsible for any clawed couches, ruined carpets, or missing tribble or shinies**



    TL;DR - Why are Caitian ships so shiny? They have lick-clean crew.
  • gstamo01gstamo01 Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    I've got a theory,
    that it's a demon,
    a dancing demon,
    no,something isn't right there..
    You know Cryptic has Jumped the Proverbial Shark when they introduced Tractor Pulling to Star Trek Online! :D
  • kimmerakimmera Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    I've got a theory. It doesn't matter. What can't we face when we're together?
  • nileight1nileight1 Member Posts: 249 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    Better a kitty than a hairless monkey.
  • gstamo01gstamo01 Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2012
    kimmera wrote: »
    I've got a theory. It doesn't matter. What can't we face when we're together?

    Glad someone was willing to play along with that :D
    You know Cryptic has Jumped the Proverbial Shark when they introduced Tractor Pulling to Star Trek Online! :D
  • resoundingenvoyresoundingenvoy Member Posts: 439
    edited August 2012
    I have theory ...

    Captain Picard once said once said the federation evolved past the need for money, but I think this to be a lie. I once wondered why in the ground based special task forces like cure why ships didn't park in close orbit for carpet bombing or carriers didn't send in their fighters for close air support.

    I know know this to be because the Federation are worse looters then the entire of the Klingon Empire!

    Using their firepower to it's full effect would destroy all the loot. So instead of glassing the place from orbit, using close air support, or even transporting down a few hundred red-shirt and other ground support? Captains now bring only their most trusted officers to help with the looting of minor target. They trust only them selves and a few other captain to help with the looting of high-priority targets!
  • anthonyxmas1anthonyxmas1 Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited August 2012
    anazonda wrote: »
    STO catnip

    Why do you think they are called Ferasan nepeta leaves? A sly pun: read "nep" as "nip" ;)
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    LAUREN RULZ !!!!!!!!
  • tharkantharkan Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited August 2012
    I have a theory...
    I believe that there is a conspiracy going on here involving [ERROR DATA CORRUPTION] and the [CANNOT RETRIEVE DATA PLEASE TRY AGAIN] to [REDACTED].
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