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Forums > Home› Feedback› Federation Discussion› Earth Spacedock
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Set Phasers to Sexytime... Again!

obiwanjabroniobiwanjabroni Member Posts: 146 Arc User
edited March 2015 in Earth Spacedock
PWE may knock us down, but we'll get up again. Unless someone else is willing to bring us a beer. Then we'll make ourselves comfortable. Anyway, on with the recruitment pitch...

Three things you should know about the Unrepentant Fleet in Star Trek Online:

1. We believe in a 6-pack in every replicator, a phaser on every bow, and an Orion Love Slave* in every Captain's Quarters. Join us, and together we will make it so.

2. We want you to play what you want, when you want it. Our guild is about having a good time in good company, not following crazy rules or mandatory play times.

3. Kirk? Picard? Hah - we know the best starship captain is Zapp Brannigan.

Here's the deal. Unrepentant is a casual guild out to have some fun times flying in space and blowing stuff up. We're a bunch of overgrown kids who think the people you play with are more important than the games you play. We have families, jobs, life obligations; we log on at night to chill with cool folks just like us. If you're someone just like us, we want you in the fleet.

But wait! There's more! Not only do you get a fleet full of cool cats when you join The U, you get a whole gaming community! Unrepentant is an adult gaming community with active guilds in GW2, FFXIV, WildStar, SWTOR, DDO, and NWN in addition to STO. We're gearing up for Star Citizen. We also have folks active in other games like Marvel Heroes, Mechwarrior Online, and ESO. Want to get your block on in Minecraft? Got folks there, too. Basically, if you play it, chances are we're playing it too.

Sound good? Alright. Here's what we need from you:

1. You have to be 18+. Our average guild member is around 30; our members range from 20s to 60s.
2. Sobriety is optional, but pants are not allowed.
3. You need to click this sentence.

That's it! Looking forward to flying the friendly Federation skies with you soon, Captain.




*Male or female. We're equal opportunity perverts.
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Post edited by obiwanjabroni on
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Comments

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    viperjockviperjock Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    AND I CAN INCREASE POST COUNT AGAIN!


    sooo...when the GAMEGETSBROKENYETAGAINBECAUSETHEY DONT CARE ABOUT*insert whatever your gripe is here* you can always check out some of our other offerings :D.....we are everywhere...and we are legion......:cool:
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    obiwanjabroniobiwanjabroni Member Posts: 146 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    Welcome back to the forums, Viper. Glad the pirates finally released you!
    sig_universal.png
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    rumbleprumblep Member Posts: 131 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    You guys know you still smell funny right? btw seems like alot of us cant keep our old names... PWE can.... i'll stop there.... most of you that know me know what I wanna say...
    -Captain Saffrin
    Federation 12th Cavalry
    Deep Space 19/USS Montana
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    fastback64fastback64 Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    Ah, I love that new forum smell......
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    darthlonestarrdarthlonestarr Member Posts: 161 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    Oh my, I feel like we lost so much history restarting the Starbase one thread. There was that.......story RC made up. Plus talk of tribbles, and oh ya that other thing about the fleet doing that one thing. Good times.

    And RIP - CARLOSSPICEYWIENER - I will miss you.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Unrepentant; the pants optional fleet.
    Support Flagship PVP and Target Marking
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    rumbleprumblep Member Posts: 131 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    AWW DAMN! NO CARLOS!!!!!! Its a sad day... *crys on darthlonestarr's shoulder like a blubbering idiot*
    -Captain Saffrin
    Federation 12th Cavalry
    Deep Space 19/USS Montana
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    obiwanjabroniobiwanjabroni Member Posts: 146 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    You know, instead of crying about it, you could come up with an interesting story about how our PWE overlords instituted these new forum limitations as a reaction to the presence of your all-capped, too-lengthy SPICEYWEINER. A classic tale of envy and revenge and whatnot...

    Seriously, it makes as much sense as the other conspiracy theories floating around on these boards.


    Join the U!

    We have:
    -Cool people!
    -SPICEY WEINERS!
    -A relative lack of conspiracy theories!
    -Forums where you can customize your own avatar and signature!
    -Beer!
    -Pie!
    sig_universal.png
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    darthlonestarrdarthlonestarr Member Posts: 161 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    rumblep wrote: »
    AWW DAMN! NO CARLOS!!!!!! Its a sad day... *crys on darthlonestarr's shoulder like a blubbering idiot*

    New things make my head hurt. New Forum name, no sexy ship in my sig, new Fleet post, New U website, using Firefox over IE.

    Ahhhhhhhhhhhh

    Spent about an hour trying to link my account to come up with a nifty new forum name. Nothing like a Star Wars/Space Balls reference to ease the pain.

    Soon it will be the weekend and there will be time for setting my Phasers to Sexytime once again.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Unrepentant; the pants optional fleet.
    Support Flagship PVP and Target Marking
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    rumbleprumblep Member Posts: 131 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    There was once a Man named CARLOSSPICEYWIENER. He walked tall, carried a massive weiner and spoke loud enough for the universe to hear. One day a cruel gun toting pirate came along and with a single shot at range.... like the real coward he was, shot CARLOSSPICEYWIENER in the face. He thrashed around for a bit and then dematerilized like something out of a bad episode of Caprica.

    That gun toting pirate later became known as PWE!

    THEE END

    RC, fix this. I dont have your knack for long winded bull**** stories lol.
    -Captain Saffrin
    Federation 12th Cavalry
    Deep Space 19/USS Montana
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    obiwanjabroniobiwanjabroni Member Posts: 146 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    Well at least some of those changes are good things.

    We all miss your SPICEYWEINER, though. At least you can still handle your WEINER ingame... I mean, at least your ingame handle is the same.
    sig_universal.png
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    grravergrraver Member Posts: 152 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    hehe we started over. We will make it even better now. Im not worried. Change is good, the only constant in the universe is change. Join the U and you will find out how we can change your life, and how you can possibly change ours.
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    grravergrraver Member Posts: 152 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    just noticed the zapp link in the recruit pitch doesnt work anymore...
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    obiwanjabroniobiwanjabroni Member Posts: 146 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    Stupid YouTube and stupid copyrights.

    For those of you who never got to see the link, it was HILARIOUS.
    sig_universal.png
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    grravergrraver Member Posts: 152 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    The HILARIOUSness will be enflamed by benders flaming a$$ :D
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    raincrow1straincrow1st Member Posts: 1 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    "HOTTIE!!" rc seldom raised his voice on the bridge and this was from his ready room.:eek:

    "What the heck happened to my passcodes, I was trying to contact the fleet." Hottie was rc's very first officer he recruited durng the Azura disaster. When stressed he relied on her, even tho Spike is the XO, and Spike understands.

    "Sir there has been an... upgrade." she hesitated saying the word. She might as well have been Zaphod Beeblebrox shouting Belgium.

    "Why can't those infernal engineers leave well enough alone... sorry Fannie, but who authorized this?"

    "The Federation and the Klingon defense league. It was Mandated a few days ago, we just got the message due to the Nebula's interferance while we were studying it." Fannie kept her temper under control, she'd have words with him later.

    "Spike, help me sort this out. Why am I not able to use my old access id...?"

    "You may have accidently duplicated it sir. Let's have a look." She sauntered over to the Big chair and leaned over to recheck the settings. Rc's irritability was mounting.

    "Palmer! Aren't you supposed to be driving this thing? Eyes forward and both hands on the console, mister.":rolleyes:

    The crew was in for a rough day.:mad:
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]LOVE MANKIND Hahahahahahaha
    Really Joined in MAY 2010
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    wisty5000wisty5000 Member Posts: 21 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    So is someone gonna fix that Zapp link or what? I mean seriously, just find another copy of the damned video.

    The entire leadership of this fleet is a bunch of knuckle-dragging buffoons.

    I count myself proudly in that number.

    As you were.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    grravergrraver Member Posts: 152 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    I love this group, such self deprication and amusing sci fi stories:cool:
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    git96git96 Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    Hey there! I pooped just now!
    [SIGPIC]http://sto-forum.perfectworld.com/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=89394243000&dateline=1354891771[/SIGPIC]
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    rumbleprumblep Member Posts: 131 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    *looks up at git* you just what to who for how many cookies?????????????

    Kinky... goddddddd

    This post has been edited to remove content which violates the Perfect World Entertainment Community Rules and Policies. ~kalecto
    -Captain Saffrin
    Federation 12th Cavalry
    Deep Space 19/USS Montana
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    raincrow1straincrow1st Member Posts: 1 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    "OK we got this thing fixed or what?":mad:

    "Still testing sir but our fforts have been requested for a fleet build test for the station. This is more important than finding out who the new overlord threat is."

    "OK head for Eta Eridani near K7. File our research under 'Perpetual whoopee extracators.":rolleyes::tongue:
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]LOVE MANKIND Hahahahahahaha
    Really Joined in MAY 2010
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    obiwanjabroniobiwanjabroni Member Posts: 146 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    Several Ueys hopped on Tribble to test out the Fleet Advancement system.

    We're going to rock this system.

    I can't wait for the official unveiling of our starbases: the Federation's premiere red light district locale, Club Sexytime, and the Klingon Defense Force's illustrious bastion of depravity, the Fortress of Debauchery.

    Good, sexy times shall be had by all!

    THIS, I COMMAND!
    sig_universal.png
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    kreitun#4615 kreitun
    kreitun#4615
         Member Posts: 14 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    Howdy,Howdy. Yep gonna be cool..
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    fastback64fastback64 Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    We filled all three tiers last night. Timer should be done around 1 ET.

    Let Club Sexytime be a beacon of hope for a weary universe...or just show up and have some fun.

    BTW the new PVE missions are very nice....
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    wisty5000wisty5000 Member Posts: 21 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    Damn you kids for not playing when I was around! I need a Tribble fleet invite damnit. Like right now!
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    raincrow1straincrow1st Member Posts: 1 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    Fun stuff, Our Klingon version looks pretty freaking cool, too. The Oiled Orion Wrestling pit is an experience. Oops... I fell in again!!:tongue:
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]LOVE MANKIND Hahahahahahaha
    Really Joined in MAY 2010
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    darthlonestarrdarthlonestarr Member Posts: 161 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    Fleets - the reason STO is going to be around for a long time. I am a huge fan of the new PVE fleet actions.

    A real reason to build a tank cruiser again.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Unrepentant; the pants optional fleet.
    Support Flagship PVP and Target Marking
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    grravergrraver Member Posts: 152 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    what to say what to say.. lol just glad to be back. Its like i never left. Hey if you want to be somewhere, and you like to take your figuretive pants off, chill out, and be inactive for a while but when you come back its like you never left? Check us out.
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    raincrow1straincrow1st Member Posts: 1 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    So I see the 12th fleet and our Vulcan friends have their Signatures and posted history showing. Nothing against them many Ueys have ran missions with both fleets, myself included, just wondered was our prior bad behaviour or questionable posts an issue?:cool:

    Granted I resemble one of the guilty parties, but heck this makes us look like some noobs instead of the STF smashing, Bank overflowing rogues that we are!

    I realize the sort of recruits we want will be smart enough to realize there is some history here, and I suppose I need to update the Tales from the Turgid Tadpole in the U's Troll Tavern, but wow... the Mighty U, who gifted starflee with the Dervish should get a little more respect...

    "Ah Captan, your fly is open..."

    Whatever... we get no love at all?:confused:
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]LOVE MANKIND Hahahahahahaha
    Really Joined in MAY 2010
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    obiwanjabroniobiwanjabroni Member Posts: 146 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    The original recruitment post was full of outdated and/or incorrect information and I had no way to edit it.

    Our old signatures violated the size restrictions of even the previous Cryptic forums. Now they just flat out aren't allowed because of it (and because some of the code, I think). This is why I'd like us to get some new fleet sigs whipped up.

    Also, being recruited by "Archived Post" or whatever is just lame.

    We can rebuild the recruitment thread. We have the technology. We can make it better, faster, stronger.
    sig_universal.png
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    itewkitewk Member Posts: 18 Arc User
    edited June 2012
    Oh wow. A squeaky clean recruitment thread for the U. I can fix that ;)

    I am glade to be back amongst friends. Hope this brings in some more.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
This discussion has been closed.