If you get a chance, I would like it if you play my mission.
TITLE : "The Winter of Our Discontent"
AUTHOR : ddommus
CODE : ST -HLGAG8JBD
LEVEL : 31+
LOCATION : Rhi System of Alpha Centuri
LENGTH : 35 - 45 minutes
TAGS : FED
DESCRIPTION : A Federation world is the scene of a bloody revolt. A group of separatists will not rest until their world is free from its Federation obligations. Can you and your crew find the targets of their political upheaval or will democracy fall on the planet Renorilliax?
Something that I feel Stark Trek does really well is mirroring current events, and that what this mission tries to do. It stands as a comment on the political upheaval happening in the world today. I find inspiration for my missions...which this is the first, in specific Star Trek shows. This missions plays out for my as DS9 inspired. The name of the planet is a nod to the overly long planet names in Dr. Who.
Thanks!
The Winter of Our Discontent
RATINGS OUT OF 5 - 28/5/11
Gameplay 4
Trek 4
Design 3
Difficulty 2
Grind 1
THOUGHTS : This mission knocked my socks of. A great diplomatic type mission to join the ranks of Conjoined. This mission is an adventure. Vibrantly designed, well written and great characters. If there is anything wrong with it, it ends. *****/Stars.
Comment:
Absolutely loved it. A great diplomatic mission filled with adventure. |Gameplay 4|Trek 4|Design 3|Difficulty 2|Grind 1| ***** STARS
Critical Analysis
Description I like the little notes towards Dialog heavy etc... If it can fit it is always nice to put in the mission location in green as well.
Mission Accept Box Green text amongst the Dialog is ugly. Use the Mission prompt text wisely and separate from the Dialog text. The optional extra bit, should be optional. Use Adv Dialog.
First Thoughts On the way to the mission I'm excited by the fact that this mission may tickle my Trek bone. Sounds like something a Starfleet vessel would be called to assist in.
1st Door Helm slow to impulse is not a great door interact text for foundry. Your mission might not be the only one in the players mission list. Using [Mission : Title] or [Enter Renorilliax] is preferable. Pluss the pop up needs more story dialog driven content.
Maps:
Renorilliax Space Wow great first map. Scan location needed for first interaction in your mission. Preferably a Blinking satellite pod.
Red Mist Tavern Yah eye candy. The dabo table looks a little out of place and you could probably get away with an atmospheric effect in here too. Red mist .
Renorilliax Ground The first conflict should be optional. It doesn't advance the story line so it shouldn't be mandatory. Let me decide whether to engage them or sneak around them.
Library Door looks out of place. Klingon or Romulun would be preferred. Or other suggestions towards federation design need to be implemented.
Renorilliax Ground 2 Scan location please. No v no Vvvvvvv.
Tunnels This feels like a federation vessel, rather than tunnels.
Renorilliax Ground 3 Loved it.
Objectives:
Scan the beam in location - People will immediately press v. Great way to use the players interface/keyboard for doing interactive story elements.
Find the Library I shouldn't have to open up my map to find the objective. Once again enemies should be optional.
Enter library Basement Doesn't feel like I'm entering a basement. Enter library should suffice.
Access tunnels Doesn't feel like a tunnels. Needs more fighting going on. Friendly NPC's would be nice.
Story:
1.I'd put the mission Briefing in the 1st popup dialog box and optional extra content in the mission 1st door map transition box.
2.Dialog is great, however I don't feel a part of the story. Break it up in the Adv dialog design. 1st stream quick and to the point, 2nd optional humor or extra character driven and 3rd more details towards the story.
3.Questioning the prisoner could be a puzzle type popup to make it feel more like an interrogation.
4.Confront the rebel leaders I have know idea what is going on. One minute something is happening than another and the out come is unsure as towards where the story is heading me or where the next map transition will take me. It feels like I have completed the mission, but I have another map? It's a shame because up until now it's been an amazing ride.
Design:
Transporter pad Use a trigger to make the light effects appear once I'm on the pad.
Towurnow If she is to be in the open, put here in the light.
You can also use Map transitions as interact with object. Most of your map Transition dialog feels forced text. This might help.
Note To Author:
I have designed you a banner and plan to advertise this mission at StarbaseUGC. Please let me know if this goes against your wishes. The Winter of Our Discontent BANNER.
TITLE : Winaprise Ep 3: Arrival AUTHOR : OptimusLG CODE : ST-HHB7FWK7C LEVEL : Any LOCATION : Earth Spacedock LENGTH : 15-30 mins TAGS : FED, DIP, GND, PZL DESCRIPTION : Admiral Smith's Starship Reclamation Initiative is in danger of being shut down if he can't find a crew to man the test ship. Just as he's about to call it quits, new information about Utopia Planitia's mysterious visitors could give Admiral Smith just what he needs to continue his pet project.
RATINGS OUT OF 5 Gameplay 2.5 Trek 2 Design 2.5 Difficulty 1 Grind 3
THOUGHTS : Well to a series well started, it now ends with my interest and a ridiculous story as well as plot holes. Author needs a lesson in story telling. His ability to keep his mission interesting is very well executed, but falls short by not giving the player an explanation within script towards his story elements. ***/Stars.
Title: "Give Peace a Chance" ID: ST-HEKVFM75X Author: Futurecaptain Allegience: Starfleet Level: 41+ Location: Deep Space K-7 from sector space. Duration: 20-30 mins Description: The Gorn have long maintained that much of the Alpha and Beta Quadrants belong to them. While this ideaology has persisted there are some Gorn who wish to see a change. We have planned a peace conference with just such a Gorn to see what we need to accomplish to achieve peace. We have a rare opportunity here, we must take full advantage.
RATINGS OUT OF 5
Gameplay 3
Trek 2
Design 2.5
Difficulty 2
Grind 3 THOUGHTS : This mission is yet another take or rescue the diplomat. Unfortunately due to the Authors intention to do a series, this mission does not stand on it's own, nor influence me to play the sequel. It offers some fun combat and an enjoyable capture the bridge sequence, but other than that it is a grind and finds me wishing this competent author would start with something simple. ***/Stars.
Hi mate,
Would really appreciate your feedback on a mission!
TITLE : Alpha Shock
AUTHOR : P90James
CODE : ST-HRT4YPETV
LEVEL : 43+ (for access to Borg sector)
LOCATION : Sibiran System, Gamma Orionis
LENGTH : Approx 30 mins
TAGS : Fed
There is a previous mission in the chain, Taskforce Alpha also starting in the same location. If you want to run it also it's quite short, 15-20 mins tops.
Thanks so much for the review. I plan on incorporating your feedback in my next rewrite. As for the banner...thanks so much, feel free to post it. Thanks again.
Thank you for your input on our Watcher War series, I was glad you liked part two, it was certainly my favorite to make so far. Our next episode will be Dal'Rok, a bit of nostalgia for you DS9 fans out there.
Thanks for all your efforts and great reviews. Here is a summary of my mission. I appreicate your feedback.
TITLE : Project Echo: A Lost Reflection AUTHOR : rfrance CODE : ST-HCHA65GXS LEVEL : 16+ LOCATION : Elvren System of Alpha Centauri Sector. LENGTH : 1 - 1.5 hr TAGS : FED, puzzles, combat, story, ground, space, role-play, powers, optional DESCRIPTION :
Starfleet Command has lost contact with the U.S.S. Reflection while conducting experiments of a new prototype system called Project Echo. You are being sent to investigate and determine the fate of the ship near the Elvren System of Alpha Centauri Sector.
Key Features:
* Averages 1 to 1.50 hours with mix of story and combat. Written in the 'trek' style.
* Optional objectives and multiple paths!
* Unique and challenging puzzles. Ask your officers for help or hints as needed. Or just skip entirely!
* Multiple endings!
* New abilities you can actually use on ground and in space!
* For best role-play experience, include all roles in your away team.
* Play tested and supported at various difficulties including Elite.
Hi mate,
Would really appreciate your feedback on a mission!
TITLE : Alpha Shock
AUTHOR : P90James
CODE : ST-HRT4YPETV
LEVEL : 43+ (for access to Borg sector)
LOCATION : Sibiran System, Gamma Orionis
LENGTH : Approx 30 mins
TAGS : Fed
There is a previous mission in the chain, Taskforce Alpha also starting in the same location. If you want to run it also it's quite short, 15-20 mins tops.
Thanks!!
Taskforce Alpha
Description Needs a starting location in green. This is not a mission brief window, this is where your supposed to sell your mission to the public.
Mission Accept Box This is were your mission brief should be. I can't see a sector location in green on either your description box or your accept mission popup.
First Thoughts Annoyed by the fact that I had to assume the mission started in the Gamma Orionis Sector Block. Also annoyed by the fact that I can pick up the mission, however my Rear Admiral Character can't access Gamma Orionis.
1st Door Thats all good for this system.
Maps:
1.SB82 Well the patrol like story and the constant pop ups make this map a hell of a grind.
2.USS Procyon Deck 8 The STO intor mission was more entertaining then this. The borg don't even have life. They need animations. They wouldn't just be standing around waiting to be killed. You can't even run the gantlet, you force the player to kill every single on of them and offer no eye candy or entertaining story.
3.SB82#2 Your going to make me fly all the way back. OMG it's like playing Farmville. The Scanner also takes me to a Platform and not the Starbase.
Objectives:
Story:
1.You need to either use Adv Dialog to cut down on the dialog or split it up for those of us that hate to read or make it more interesting, rather then so regimented. The dialog is no more entertaining then reading the objectives.
2.
Design:
I've gotten to a point where I'm not even reading the dialog, because I don't have to. There is nothing in the interaction in this mission that need more explanation than what I am experiencing.
Comment - This is a top notch first attempt mission. It is driven by meaning ess tasks that make it feel Grindish, but has what we want STO to be. You are the captain in this mission. |Gameplay 2|Trek 4|Design 2|Difficulty 3.5|Grind 3.5|
RATINGS OUT OF 5 - 27/5/11
Gameplay 2
Trek 4
Design 2
Difficulty 3.5
Grind 3.5
THOUGHTS : This mission would have been quite popular in the Early Foundry tribble days, however It doesn't hold it's own with the advancement of Foundry authoring. What this mission doesn't offer in excitement it makes up in vision towards how allot of people would like STO to be played. This is a top notch fist mission attempt ***/Stars.
TITLE : The Hunt for Peace
AUTHOR : Pinecone3
CODE : ST-HMNKI6SK6
LEVEL : 16+
LOCATION : Hadrian System of Alpha Centauri Sector.
LENGTH : 20-30 Minutes
TAGS : FED, Cryptic Mission Tie-ins, Pseudo Class Based Objectives, Re-skining
DESCRIPTION : A Romulan Colony, after the dissappearance of Empress Sela, has broken away from the empire to do private buisness and adopt a less agressive policy towards the Federation. The empire ignores this, until discovering that the colony has been providing sanctuary to Reman rebels. Angered, the Empire provides their Hirogen allies with the location of the colony, a prime hunting target. In desperation, the colony requests Starfleet assistace. Go to the Hadrian System in the Alpha Centauri Block.
Oh, and BTW, my old mission "Peace is Weak" no longer exists. so don't worry about rating that one.
Greetings filbones. Here is my offering, the first of a 3 part series.
TITLE : Plato's Grandchildren
AUTHOR : Raptorwalker
CODE : ST-HLYK79EDN
LEVEL : Any
LOCATION : Veela, Regulus sector
LENGTH : 10-15 minutes
TAGS : FED
DESCRIPTION : A cryptic message is intercepted from what was thought to be an uninhabited system. Your ship is sent to investigate the source of the message.
LINKS : See banner below \/
TITLE : Alpha Shock
AUTHOR : P90James
CODE : ST-HRT4YPETV
LEVEL : 43+ (for access to Borg sector)
LOCATION : Sibiran System, Gamma Orionis
LENGTH : Approx 30 mins
TAGS : Fed
DESCRIPTION :
LINKS :
RATINGS OUT OF 5 - 27/5/11
Gameplay 2.5
Trek 3
Design 3
Difficulty 4
Grind 4 THOUGHTS : This mission is great if you like Borg and want to play more content like Infected. Unfortunately it feels like other missions I've played on STO peaced together. This has a nostalgic feel, but for those of us looking for something new and mysterious this mission falls short of a quarter.***/Stars.
Description Boy oh boy, where do I start. After playing the last one the description doesn't really give me much anxiousness towards playing.
Mission Accept Box This could have a little more in it. Such as what I'm to expect or anticipate from possibly the Borg.
First Thoughts Well seeing as though the first mission was about as entertaining as the STO Tutorial this mission better knock the socks of me. Assuming this one is better than the first because you would have become more skilled, the first one will probably not do it justice.
1st Door
Maps:
1.SB82 EXT, This is too much. Your practically doing exactly the same scenario. Yes the story has been tweaked, but it's still go here shoot Borg.
2.Outpost Gamma Six This is a fun map but the story lacks.
3.Interior. Enemies too hard for a standard Foundry mission. Unless your want it to be more fleet action or STF Style.
4.Lower Level. Ran the gantlet. You can't expect anyone to fight through all those groups. I'd prefer to be doing infected.
5.Deck 63 Short and sweet why the north and south search. Just another hint at plagiarism towards cryptic missions. Make the maps your own.
6.This is not a good end, atleast make the map Transition worth while.
Objectives:
Story:
1.now your Probably wondering what your orders are. These shoul of been in the Accept mission dialog box.
2. Oh a delegation. Now you have a story. Damn your going to have be beam down and fight through Borg to get to something.
Design:
Comment There is nothing in this mission you have not or can not play in STO general content.|Gameplay 2.5|Trek 3|Design 3|Difficulty 4|Grind 4|
TITLE : Sorti Rising AUTHOR : Commodore_Stipe CODE : LEVEL : 31+l LOCATION : LENGTH : TAGS : Fed DESCRIPTION : You are sent to Sorti Prime to conduct final evaluations for it's application for Federation membership. However, Federation politics and a well kept secret make your choices difficult. The final outcome is up to you. This mission has multiple endings based on your decisions.
LINKS :
RATINGS OUT OF 5 - 27/5/11
Gameplay 3
Trek 3
Design 3
Difficulty 3
Grind 4 THOUGHTS : There is so much to this mission. Unfortunately the authors ability to entertain the player within his plot line is lacking. People who love delving into a new species and love foundry not necessarily for the game play may enjoy this mission. An exploration with far to much thought.****/Stars.
Description Start location in green missing.
Mission Accept Box Mabey an indication to the location being below the promenade so people don't go though all the upper level platforms at ESD. Also a hint to meeting your senior staff there.
First Thoughts I like the fact that it's at ESD.
1st Door Thats all good for this system. [Lets Go See What She Wants] Try [Enter: Sorti Rising] or Enter what's her names office.
Maps:
1.Office Flag at 0 coordinate. A chair is facing the wrong way.
2.Bridge I think I might need some crew.
3.Sorti System # 2 Too short waste of map transitions.
4.Hydra Station. Consoles in weird positions.
5.S'trin Base- Boy oh boy are the wild life fit on this planet.
6.Unknown Cave. - Up until this point has been your Prelude to a crisis, which should be 2 maps at most.
7.Sorti System Well With out the story I might have a clue as too which faction I liked most, however Due to the long massive pointless prelude to this mission. I can't seem to recall any of the main point in this mission. The advancement of the plotline needs more emphasis.
8.Hydra map Yes finaly this is what I'm talking about. Get me into this type of game play sooner.
Objectives:
Enter Sorti System should be approach Sorti prime or station.
Sirellia Compound Most over used map in Foundry.
Story:
1.In the office you need Advance dialog. I was enjoying getting into the story. But then it was like popup after popup. Boy oh boy kill me now.
2.Bridge Computer was a nice optional. However I would of liked to do a bit more on this map. Otherwise just have me go straight to the ready room. Rather than give me a bridge that looks nothing like mine.
3.I just don't really care about this race. More visuals of there culture and planet would have been preferable to an Interior. Then when I actually get down to the planet the first thing I see is a distinctively Vulcan building.
4.I can see allot of content going a miss because I'm only following Objectives. Make your worlds more original and focus on Eye candy and none obvious objectives in this kind of mission.
5.I'm a mutant. Now this part of the story I want more info on. You give so much info on other stuff that doesn't advance the plot line and don't explain this story element.
Design:
There are many consoles that you can see inside of because there not flush on a wall.
You need to check the wander. Speed 5 slow walk 10 fast walk 15 jog 20 sprint, anything higher is only for the Fantastic 4 or Green Lanter.
Comment - I would of given this three stars, but the author has put allot of work into it. More polish needed. By the time the enjoyment of this mission kicked in, I had Lost interest. |Gameplay 3|Trek 3|Design 3|Difficulty 3|Grind 4|
TITLE : Project Echo: A Lost Reflection AUTHOR : rfrance CODE : ST-HCHA65GXS LEVEL : 16+ LOCATION : Elvren System of Alpha Centauri Sector. LENGTH : 1 - 1.5 hr TAGS : FED, puzzles, combat, story, ground, space, role-play, powers, optional DESCRIPTION : Starfleet Command has lost contact with the U.S.S. Reflection while conducting experiments of a new prototype system called Project Echo. You are being sent to investigate and determine the fate of the ship near the Elvren System of Alpha Centauri Sector. Key Features:
* Averages 1 to 1.50 hours with mix of story and combat. Written in the 'trek' style.
* Optional objectives and multiple paths!
* Unique and challenging puzzles. Ask your officers for help or hints as needed. Or just skip entirely!
* Multiple endings!
* New abilities you can actually use on ground and in space!
* For best role-play experience, include all roles in your away team.
* Play tested and supported at various difficulties including Elite.
RATINGS OUT OF 5
Gameplay 4
Trek 4
Design 4
Difficulty 3
Grind 3 THOUGHTS : An extremely enjoyable mission with optional objectives. It doesn't have the exploration and new world factor of other great foundry missions, but the most competent save the ship and explore a ship interior mission I've come across. The journey is the key and this one doesn't miss a beat. *****/Stars.
Description Hallaloo yah....
Mission Accept Box Perhaps the personal thing could be in ooc and in a pop up at the end of the mission. I like to get my brief in the accept mission dialog box. I need to have a little bit about how the story starts to click on that box.
First Thoughts Yah a Rfrance mission. My expectations are high and I finally get to play one of them. People have told me that your Foundry style is much like mine. So hopefully I like what I create.
1st Door Excellent. 3 stars before I even start the mission.
Maps:
1.Capa System Map doesn't map sense Theoretically. But aesthetically pleasing.
2.Shuttle bay Not much for a Map transition, didn't hinder on my enjoyment.
Objectives:
I lost my reflexion. I'm not a huge fan of personal Objective text.
Ahha nice use of optional content.
Hmm Romulan's Kill them. I would of liked to try and hail them or have a conversation with them.
Take Turbo lift. Have the map transition from a reach marker. Or at least don't use the entire turbo lift as an interact with object.
Love the Puzzel but bypassed it. Couldn't be bothered to learn what I have to do. But well installed.
So far the only mission I have played were I have actually enjoyed one map objectives before transitions.
Story:
1.Engineering was epic.
2.Hmm Now why would the Romulan officer appear on my tricorder?
Design:
Conference room feels naked. There many other maps you could use with windows. Just doesn't feel like the classic trek conference room.
Enemy contacts in Indaga map got stuck on Asteroid.
Loved the cut scene. Excellent Generations reference.
On the Interior of the Reflexion, Markers need to be move further away from enemies, because I keep seeing Romulan's beam in.
Comment -Still needs some polish on the last map, with the optional objectives, but this mission is an amazing triumph . |Gameplay 4|Trek 4|Design 4|Difficulty 3|Grind 2|
Hi Filbones,
I'd love to hear your input on my mission series, "Winaprise." Now that I have five missions out there, it's time for some real constructive criticism!
Please note that episodes 4 and 5 are published, but still in the review process.
TITLE : Winaprise Ep 1: Hollow Profits AUTHOR : OptimusLG CODE : ST-HUYI2TQLQ LEVEL : Any LOCATION : Korvat System (Pi Canis) LENGTH : 15-30 mins TAGS : FED, COM, GND, SPC DESCRIPTION : You have been chosen to assist in the new Starship Reclamation Initiative, an experimental program designed to retrieve damaged halves of Galaxy-Class starships and combine them to create new, functional Galaxy-Class ships. Your first task is to prepare the engineering hull of the U.S.S. Winnipeg for the first test of this new Initiative.
TITLE : Winaprise Ep 2: Resurrection AUTHOR : OptimusLG CODE : ST-HAGKR6H3V LEVEL : Any LOCATION : Earth Spacedock LENGTH : 15-30 mins TAGS : FED, COM, GND, SPC DESCRIPTION : Now that you've successfully brought in a Galaxy-Class engineering hull, it's time to find a saucer. A legendary starship that crash-landed on a distant planet years ago is your target, but retrieving it may not be a simple task.
TITLE : Winaprise Ep 3: Arrival AUTHOR : OptimusLG CODE : ST-HHB7FWK7C LEVEL : Any LOCATION : Earth Spacedock LENGTH : 15-30 mins TAGS : FED, DIP, GND, PZL DESCRIPTION : Admiral Smith's Starship Reclamation Initiative is in danger of being shut down if he can't find a crew to man the test ship. Just as he's about to call it quits, new information about Utopia Planitia's mysterious visitors could give Admiral Smith just what he needs to continue his pet project.
TITLE : Winaprise Ep 4: Fixer-Upper AUTHOR : OptimusLG CODE : ST-HFRRXU5XO LEVEL : 31+ LOCATION : Earth Spacedock LENGTH : 15-30 mins TAGS : FED, DIP, GND, PZL DESCRIPTION : Now that the Winaprise has a crew, they are hard at work preparing the ship to leave spacedock. After beaming aboard to help with system modifications, you learn that the ship may not be the only thing that needs attention.
TITLE : Winaprise Ep 5: Enter the Pugatu AUTHOR : OptimusLG CODE : ST-HAOG6VZMO LEVEL : Any LOCATION : Donia System (Sirius) LENGTH : 15-30 mins TAGS : FED, COM, GND, SPC, PZL DESCRIPTION : The crew of the Winaprise needs your help once more as their first mission takes an unexpected turn. The research station they were sent to assist seems to have been abandoned, but there is evidence of foul play...
I offer my first of three missions for your review:
Title: "Give Peace a Chance"
ID: ST-HEKVFM75X
Author: Futurecaptain
Allegience: Starfleet
Level: 41+
Location: Deep Space K-7 from sector space.
Duration: 20-30 mins
Description: The Gorn have long maintained that much of the Alpha and Beta Quadrants belong to them. While this ideaology has persisted there are some Gorn who wish to see a change. We have planned a peace conference with just such a Gorn to see what we need to accomplish to achieve peace. We have a rare opportunity here, we must take full advantage.
Thank you in advance, I look forward to your feedback!
TITLE : The Hunt for Peace AUTHOR : Pinecone3 CODE : ST-HMNKI6SK6 LEVEL : 16+ LOCATION : Hadrian System of Alpha Centauri Sector. LENGTH : 20-30 Minutes TAGS : FED, Cryptic Mission Tie-ins, Pseudo Class Based Objectives, Re-skining DESCRIPTION : A Romulan Colony, after the dissappearance of Empress Sela, has broken away from the empire to do private buisness and adopt a less agressive policy towards the Federation. The empire ignores this, until discovering that the colony has been providing sanctuary to Reman rebels. Angered, the Empire provides their Hirogen allies with the location of the colony, a prime hunting target. In desperation, the colony requests Starfleet assistace. Go to the Hadrian System in the Alpha Centauri Block.
RATINGS OUT OF 5
Gameplay 4
Trek 3
Design 3
Difficulty 2
Grind 1 THOUGHTS : This takes me back to the day when I played Syndicate Extraction on Tribble before Triggers. I loved this mission and that one because of it's simple story and well executed gameplay. Another great mission that ticks all the boxes by not trying to be more than it is. ****/Stars.
Description Go to the Hadrian System in the Alpha Centauri Block. Needs to be in Green. [Mission info/]
Mission Accept Box This is a briefing box. After the first accept box you can put additional information. Eg, The [shipname] is ordered to the Hadrian system in the alpha etc, there has been a transmission, you need to do this and look out for that. Then popup of transmission and other extra content. Be mind ful players might not pick up your mission while in sector space.
First Thoughts There looks to be an interesting story here. However the non generic custom of your mission accept box has me questioning your competence as an author. So far a 2 star mission. It's nice being sent somewhere I haven't been in a while.
1st Door
Maps:
1.Hadrian System Grind straight of the bat. Can't I just do a general scan of the whole area.
2.Ground was great. Straight to the action.
3.Romulan Cave great mix of enemies. Would of liked to of heard the Hirogens side to the story.
4.Bridge Give me more to do here, the Trait puzzle is great. This map could use some personal customization.
5.Hadrian system #2 never have a battle straight out of a map transition. To much lag and If you have paused the map transition to do other stuff on your PC the battle will be over before I press any key to continue.
Objectives:
Story:
1.By having the Hirogen near the moon it feels like I'm going to hunt them down. Have them warp in after speech bubble.
2.Map transition box beam down point less. Move the last pop up box to replace it. Prepare away team in continue box. x2
Design:
Comment -A mission that gets back to basics. Simple, entertaining and doesn't try to be more than it is. |Gameplay 4|Trek 3|Design 3|Difficulty 2|Grind 1|
Plato's Grandchildren By Raptorwalker TITLE : Plato's Grandchildren AUTHOR : Raptorwalker CODE : ST-HLYK79EDN LEVEL : Any LOCATION : Veela, Regulus sector LENGTH : 10-15 minutes TAGS : FED DESCRIPTION : A cryptic message is intercepted from what was thought to be an uninhabited system. Your ship is sent to investigate the source of the message. LINKS : http://i1081.photobucket.com/albums/j346/raptorwalker/Platosgrand.jpg
RATINGS OUT OF 5
Gameplay 4.5
Trek 4
Design 3.5
Difficulty 1
Grind 1 THOUGHTS : This is amazingly fun. Not the most original story, but well exectuted. Very rare to find simple and well developed Foundry missions. An Author to look out for. *****/Stars.
Description Mission location in green please.
Mission Accept Box Liked it. But more of a Cryptic STO Brief would be nice.
First Thoughts I finally get to play a mission on one of my new toons. Level 7. I have been looking forward to this mission for a while. Hope it's not TOS related and I don't regret buying the TOS pack for my new character instead of the ENT pack.
1st Door I have two options here, Preferably change it to [Mission: Plato's GrandChild.] The popup could use abit of a brief about what long range scans in the area show.
Maps:
1.System p-284 Great map. Waste of a map transition though. Hate pointless map transition text. Move the last popup to replace it then Prepare away team as the continue text.
2.Smuggler Settlement Love this map. Finally an author used it.
3.Luthars compounds. A bit big and needs more reason. They wouldn't build big rooms like this for no reason. Some Drilling peaces would be nice. Maybe lower the roof with platforms. Make it darker and smaller in some parts.
Objectives:
Three more objects. Is my Engineer incompetent?
1st scan was good lead that to the other two and then have the last one as a separate objective so the Orions warp in onto of me. Preferably at the derelict station.
Jason Wyhn is in a confusing place when trying to hit the reach marker properly. Just have an Interact with contact instead of a reach marker objective.
Defeat Luthars Guards. The third group need moving. I missed them and was ready to shot the last group and shot at them thought the wall.
Story:
1.Some info on the derelict shipyard would be nice using map placed Popup.
2.Feeding the landing coordinace? My klingon Engineer must be feeling perish after his ale last night.
3.Can I use Glaf in one of my missions.
Design:
There are Klingon Grate platforms you could use as a shaft.
I would of liked to disable Luthar before he talked. Use one of the costumes with little or no visuals and put it in an invisible object on top of Luthar or beneath him. This trick comes from Napoleon_Blowapart for anyone who wants to use it.
Comment - |Wow two simple and great mission in one day. This is classy, polished and fun. Realy captures this authors potential as well as the Foundry tool. |Gameplay 4.5|Trek 4|Design 3.5|Difficulty 1|Grind 1|
Please post any other of your missions once ready for a critic.
Winaprise Ep 1: Hollow Profits By OptimusLG
TITLE : Winaprise Ep 1: Hollow Profits AUTHOR : OptimusLG CODE : ST-HUYI2TQLQ LEVEL : Any LOCATION : Korvat System (Pi Canis) LENGTH : 15-30 mins TAGS : FED, COM, GND, SPC DESCRIPTION : You have been chosen to assist in the new Starship Reclamation Initiative, an experimental program designed to retrieve damaged halves of Galaxy-Class starships and combine them to create new, functional Galaxy-Class ships. Your first task is to prepare the engineering hull of the U.S.S. Winnipeg for the first test of this new Initiative.
RATINGS OUT OF 5
Gameplay 4
Trek 3
Design 3
Difficulty 3
Grind 2 THOUGHTS : An excellent start to hopefully a repetitive but equally entertaining series. Another great quick mission that has been well executed. Story, Enemies and Exploration are all well situated on an equilateral triangle when it comes to this mission. ****/Stars.
Description You could tie this into the Outreach program given in the early stages of STO. Add start location in green please.
Mission Accept Box Great breif, however the mission may seem far fetched only limiting the parts to galxy class ships.
First Thoughts Another mission to play on my newer toons. Excellent. Hopeing this is a good mission so I will be inspired to play the rest of the series. If not you will have to submit each episode seperately to give others a chance to que there missions in my list.
1st Door [Enter Korvat system] Any level mission. Might have more than one listed in this system try [Mission : Title]. More info on what to expect needed. What crisis may I be beaming into.
Maps:
1.Winnipeg Interior. Make all klingon holograms optional.
2.Winipeg Battle Bridge. There are holograms standing on consoles. The group is way to hard to defeat by myself. Can I beam in assistance please.
Objectives:
Pi Canis needs to be added to your first objective if it's not a level restricted mission.
Story:
1.Why a Cardassian terminal instead of a Klingon one.
2.A Ferengi would not confess or agree to knowing or having anything to do with this without persuasion. Would I not arrest him for something?
Design:
Need v to scan when entering the map please. Use Blinking satellite and have it disappear when I approach.
Reach marker on the Winnipeg is too small.
Don't keep me waiting for popups after I kill an enemy. Use reach markers.
On the Winnipeg have all klingon's optional and have them only appear if I try to enter the rooms through a door.
Comment - I just can't get over these quick simple missions. Enjoyed! Gameplay 4|Trek 3|Design 3|Difficulty 3|Grind 2|
Winaprise Ep 2: Resurrection By OptimusLG TITLE : Winaprise Ep 2: Resurrection AUTHOR : OptimusLG CODE : ST-HAGKR6H3V LEVEL : Any LOCATION : Earth Spacedock LENGTH : 15-30 mins TAGS : FED, COM, GND, SPC DESCRIPTION : Now that you've successfully brought in a Galaxy-Class engineering hull, it's time to find a saucer. A legendary starship that crash-landed on a distant planet years ago is your target, but retrieving it may not be a simple task.
RATINGS OUT OF 5
Gameplay 3.5
Trek 3.5
Design 3
Difficulty 3
Grind 2
THOUGHTS : A mission with a lot of potential, but basically a great patrol mission with an amazing ST: Generations reference. Another great addition to the series but needs more work polish and plot lines. ***/Stars.
Description Description then mission location in green.
Mission Accept Box Directions in yellow mission location in green.
First Thoughts Nice reference to Generations. And I like the fact I can use my Transwarp after the last mission.
1st Door Veridian System needs to be = Access terminal outside ESD Transporter room. Also to start from this location with receive co ordinance seems pointless. Perhaps I can have a conversation with Quins secretary. And then I'm there.
Maps:
1.Veridian iii map transition to this location needs work. Beam to ready room research the USS Enterprise, Ncc-1701-D.
2.Veridian surface There is so much potential story missing here.
3.Enterprise d Bridge, Love it, but floating grass?
4.Admirals office. Platform sticking out of wall? Objectives:
Modify transporter needs more information. Okay and then suddenly the office is field with civilians. Story:
1.I think it's a bit late to be worrying about the local ecosystem.
2.Why would there be theta radiation? You need to research your time line. Also why would the debris still be smoky.
3.Would of liked to try and negotiate with the aliens. If negotiation fails enemies beam in. Or set phasers to stun.
4.I want more story from the Enemy. Possibly they were collecting the Theta for a use on there power generator aboard a ship of planet. Other wise this mission is the saucer of The Enterprise in a patrol mission. Besides the fact that it belongs in a museum.
5.Cliff hanger sucks. Hate missions that don't stand on it's own.
Design:
Enemy should fight like the Dominion Jem'adar.
Have the scan 8 debris objects as separate objectives so I can follow them in order rather than having to run all over the map.
Would of liked to ask my crew to do most of the stuff aboard the bridge and do it myself as optional.
A debis Saucer would have been more accurate.
Comment - What a shame, this mission has 5 star potential. Needs more information on events and enemies other wise it leaves your with an unsatisfactory cliff hanger. |Gameplay 3.5|Trek 3.5|Design 3|Difficulty 2|Grind 2|
TITLE : Sorti Rising AUTHOR : Commodore_Stipe CODE : LEVEL : 31+l LOCATION : LENGTH : TAGS : Fed DESCRIPTION : You are sent to Sorti Prime to conduct final evaluations for it's application for Federation membership. However, Federation politics and a well kept secret make your choices difficult. The final outcome is up to you. This mission has multiple endings based on your decisions.
LINKS :
RATINGS OUT OF 5 - 27/5/11
Gameplay 3
Trek 3
Design 3
Difficulty 3
Grind 4 THOUGHTS : There is so much to this mission. Unfortunately the authors ability to entertain the player within his plot line is lacking. People who love delving into a new species and love foundry not necessarily for the game play may enjoy this mission. An exploration with far to much thought.****/Stars.
Description Start location in green missing.
Mission Accept Box Mabey an indication to the location being below the promenade so people don't go though all the upper level platforms at ESD. Also a hint to meeting your senior staff there.
First Thoughts I like the fact that it's at ESD.
1st Door Thats all good for this system. [Lets Go See What She Wants] Try [Enter: Sorti Rising] or Enter what's her names office.
Maps:
1.Office Flag at 0 coordinate. A chair is facing the wrong way.
2.Bridge I think I might need some crew.
3.Sorti System # 2 Too short waste of map transitions.
4.Hydra Station. Consoles in weird positions.
5.S'trin Base- Boy oh boy are the wild life fit on this planet.
6.Unknown Cave. - Up until this point has been your Prelude to a crisis, which should be 2 maps at most.
7.Sorti System Well With out the story I might have a clue as too which faction I liked most, however Due to the long massive pointless prelude to this mission. I can't seem to recall any of the main point in this mission. The advancement of the plotline needs more emphasis.
8.Hydra map Yes finaly this is what I'm talking about. Get me into this type of game play sooner.
Objectives:
Enter Sorti System should be approach Sorti prime or station.
Sirellia Compound Most over used map in Foundry.
Story:
1.In the office you need Advance dialog. I was enjoying getting into the story. But then it was like popup after popup. Boy oh boy kill me now.
2.Bridge Computer was a nice optional. However I would of liked to do a bit more on this map. Otherwise just have me go straight to the ready room. Rather than give me a bridge that looks nothing like mine.
3.I just don't really care about this race. More visuals of there culture and planet would have been preferable to an Interior. Then when I actually get down to the planet the first thing I see is a distinctively Vulcan building.
4.I can see allot of content going a miss because I'm only following Objectives. Make your worlds more original and focus on Eye candy and none obvious objectives in this kind of mission.
5.I'm a mutant. Now this part of the story I want more info on. You give so much info on other stuff that doesn't advance the plot line and don't explain this story element.
Design:
There are many consoles that you can see inside of because there not flush on a wall.
You need to check the wander. Speed 5 slow walk 10 fast walk 15 jog 20 sprint, anything higher is only for the Fantastic 4 or Green Lanter.
Comment - I would of given this three stars, but the author has put allot of work into it. More polish needed. By the time the enjoyment of this mission kicked in, I had Lost interest. |Gameplay 3|Trek 3|Design 3|Difficulty 3|Grind 4|
Thanks for the review. I am, however, going to refute some of your points.
1) In the Councilor's office you state I should use Advanced dialouge. Guess what. I did. There isn't a single pop-up in that section of the story. I can even screen shot the UGC editor if you want to prove it.
2) Given that there is not very many generic componets to the Foundry assets let alone that would match my vision of this culture I actaully think I did well. It's hard to give visuals when the Foundry limits my abilities due to the fact I was trying not to use obvious pieces belonging to the core groups. Yes I used several Vulcan buildings. I did so because they are made of wood. A sustainable, renewable resource on a planet who's surface was devestated by a nuclear war and where non-renewable resources were hard to come by. It actually makes sense with they way they re-fashioned themselves.
3) Make my world more original? You have to be kidding me right? This entire story and all the maps except one, were built from scratch. Only the Hydra station map used to rescue the hostages was pre-built and I used that because it fit perfect for my vision. Again orginality is limited by the Foundry assets available. The entire compound, with the exception of the central Vulcan temple and the outlying buildings, is as generic and different as I could find in the Foundry.
4) Sadly, objectives are the only way to move the stories along. You have to do something on a map to even transition to it. However, if you choose to ignore the fact that in the two places I wanted you to look around first, by actually telling you to do so, then I can't be responsible for that.
5) The first Sorti system map is not a waste. It serves a purpose. If you bother flying around you will find a clue that plays into the story. Second, you will understand the layout of the system for the second go around when you actually have some fighting and rescuing to do.
6) Your comment about many consoles not being flush witht the wall is quite interesting. I would challenge you to define many. Mainly because I placed at most 4 consoles that could be considered needing to be against a wall. All of those are in the diplomatic center. The conoles in the mine are designed to be in the middle of rooms. The rest of the consoles are pre-placed as part of the maps.
7) The prelude is hardly pointless. The only long part I let you skip if you wish. Everything else is part of building up the story. You see the true mission is to evaluate Sorti for admission. Everything else just complicates your life. Without the background you can't make an informed choice. YOu play as a Starfleet Captain. In each and every episode I have ever watched Picard, Kirk, and the like always sought every piece of infomration they could get. It takes time to deliver that kind of information.
8) This mission is long, and it is wordy. However, it is a diplomatic mission at heart. Over the year and a half since launch there have been a number forum posts about wanting more exploration and diplomacy type missions. This mission is an attempt, and by others reviews a good one, to do that. If it is not you cup of tea fine. However, I stand by my design.
9) I will grant you I need to tone down the wander on the critters I just haven't gotten around to it yet.
Sorry to be so long winded by I put a lot of thought an work into this mission and felt justified in answering back to a few of your thoughts.
Winaprise Ep 3: Arrival By OptimusLG TITLE : Winaprise Ep 3: Arrival AUTHOR : OptimusLG CODE : ST-HHB7FWK7C LEVEL : Any LOCATION : Earth Spacedock LENGTH : 15-30 mins TAGS : FED, DIP, GND, PZL DESCRIPTION : Admiral Smith's Starship Reclamation Initiative is in danger of being shut down if he can't find a crew to man the test ship. Just as he's about to call it quits, new information about Utopia Planitia's mysterious visitors could give Admiral Smith just what he needs to continue his pet project.
RATINGS OUT OF 5 Gameplay 2.5 Trek 2 Design 2.5 Difficulty 1 Grind 3
THOUGHTS : Well to a series well started, it now ends with my interest and a ridiculous story as well as plot holes. Author needs a lesson in story telling. His ability to keep his mission interesting is very well executed, but falls short by not giving the player an explanation within script towards his story elements. ***/Stars.
Description Once again location format needs work.
Mission Accept Box Thats all good but the console again. Then start at a system. I bet the 3rd and 2nd Could be incorporated into one mission.
First Thoughts I can't help but think your series could be a good Starfleet Academy mission series. Eithur as a training mission in a Holodeck or part of the volunteer cadet Outreach Program.
1st Door Needs work. Look to previous reviews.
Maps:
1.Science lab A room of consoles with no purpose?
2.Holodeck, feels like I'm killing these enemy just to get on with the story which there currently isn't any.
3.
Objectives:
Story:
1.2011 high school students? Really? Damn you had me now you've given me more plot holes with out circumstance. I still want to know who the enemy was that attacked me on the planet, don't give me more plot satire until you've at least given me a hint.
2.So far I can see that you've just written this series of the top of your head without future planning.
3.I hope these students have an historical or Trek reference other wise there is no point in forcing me to talk to all of them. Grind?
4.Oh my Blooming Greed, this puzzle is ridiculous, besides the fact that I had to get a pen and paper to complete it there is a most annoying none plot line surrounding it.
5.A far fetch story with no reason and reality. Even within the STO Universe.
6.Combat Training would be the last thing on the list.
Design:
Talk to students needs to be optional.
Only have the puzzel revert back to were the player has completed up to in the puzzle.
Comment - Hmm, No reason to mysterious events makes this mission a satire. This authors style is slowly becoming don't explain what the audience wants to know more about.|Gameplay 2.5|Trek 2|Design 2.5|Difficulty 1|Grind 3|
"Give Peace a Chance" By Futurecaptain Title: "Give Peace a Chance" ID: ST-HEKVFM75X Author: Futurecaptain Allegience: Starfleet Level: 41+ Location: Deep Space K-7 from sector space. Duration: 20-30 mins Description: The Gorn have long maintained that much of the Alpha and Beta Quadrants belong to them. While this ideaology has persisted there are some Gorn who wish to see a change. We have planned a peace conference with just such a Gorn to see what we need to accomplish to achieve peace. We have a rare opportunity here, we must take full advantage.
RATINGS OUT OF 5
Gameplay 3
Trek 2
Design 2.5
Difficulty 2
Grind 3 THOUGHTS : This mission is yet another take or rescue the diplomat. Unfortunately due to the Authors intention to do a series, this mission does not stand on it's own, nor influence me to play the sequel. It offers some fun combat and an enjoyable capture the bridge sequence, but other than that it is a grind and finds me wishing this competent author would start with something simple. ***/Stars.
Description Mission location in green missing.
Mission Accept Box Excellent another Trans warp mission start location.
First Thoughts Hmm oh no, another diplomatic conference. Lol...
1st Door Would of like more info on the popup.
Maps:
1.K7 space This doesn't look like the one in the real world of STO.
2.Bird of prey upper deck, big interior for such little ships.
Objectives:
Go to K7 System. Just spent 10minutes running around the station after a Trans Warp.
K7 Interior. Really! just copy Starbase 82's map.
Vulcan space Map transition needs to be previous dialog.
Return to Turbo lift. Are you kidding me. Advance the plotline, never make the player go back.
Check logs - why can't I do this in the captains office.
Story:
1.Why would the Vulcan's not have detected the ships in orbit?
2.Ship interior feels a bit like go here do this then that. Added with the K7 interior this is getting to be very grindy.
Design:
Why not start your mission on the K7 interior social zone?
Beginning of your story should be. Go to k7 space beam Gorn aboard, brief him in your ready room. Maybe he bought an Orion slave while at K7 or Drozona preferably. Maybe if it were on Drozona you would have to find him.
Why not use Gorn ships?
Never have a battle after a map Transition.
Comment - A poor start to a Foundry series. This mission does not stand on it's own, otherwise it would of been 4 stars. |Gameplay 3|Trek 2|Design 2.5|Difficulty 2|Grind 3|
Sorry to be so long winded by I put a lot of thought an work into this mission and felt justified in answering back to a few of your thoughts.
No problems, that is why I gave you 4 stars instead of 3. All of what your arguing is up to you and still in your control. You asked for an opinion, I gave you my opinion and now you can choose what to do with it. I am most critical on the missions I want to enjoy, and this is one of them. As for diplomatic missions. "Conjoined" was one of my first reviews on Tribble and loved it. I did everything I could to publicise that mission and now its in most players top 5 foundry missions.
I'm not going to submit evidence to support my claims. As I hope your still working on this mission your more than welcome to resubmit it at a later date. I'm sure once you have done some play thoughts with players and got some others opinions I will enjoy the polished product and look forward to it.
Good luck.
James Cameron
"All criticism is good criticism, it's how I choice to use it that makes me a good director"
No problems, that is why I gave you 4 stars instead of 3. All of what your arguing is up to you and still in your control. You asked for an opinion, I gave you my opinion and now you can choose what to do with it. I am most critical on the missions I want to enjoy, and this is one of them. As for diplomatic missions. "Conjoined" was one of my first reviews on Tribble and loved it. I did everything I could to publicise that mission and now its in most players top 5 foundry missions.
I'm not going to submit evidence to support my claims. As I hope your still working on this mission your more than welcome to resubmit it at a later date. I'm sure once you have done some play thoughts with players and got some others opinions I will enjoy the polished product and look forward to it.
Good luck.
James Cameron
"All criticism is good criticism, it's how I choice to use it that makes me a good director"
I understand that and I thank you. The console thing really bothers me though. As I said the only consoles I placed were in Hydra Station diplomatic center. I guess what I really wanted was where you were talking about because if it any other than those few I can do nothing about them as they are pre-placed. If you could clairfy that one issue I would be very thankful. For clarity I am talking about your statement regarding consoles being see-thru as they were not flush with the wall.
I understand that and I thank you. The console thing really bothers me though. As I said the only consoles I placed were in Hydra Station diplomatic center. I guess what I really wanted was where you were talking about because if it any other than those few I can do nothing about them as they are pre-placed. If you could clairfy that one issue I would be very thankful. For clarity I am talking about your statement regarding consoles being see-thru as they were not flush with the wall.
First Blue wall console to the right., in the corridor. As for others I can recall. I remember a platform in the office poking out of the wall though. On the ramp of the other side of the office.
First Blue wall console to the right., in the corridor. As for others I can recall. I remember a platform in the office poking out of the wall though. On the ramp of the other side of the office.[/QUOTE
Thanks I will check those; based on your descriptions though are these in the diplomatic center, or during the hostage rescue and if you can't rember that's ok?
Filbones, in your original post you listed in under recommended DONT'S:
"Use artistic creativity with generic STO Implements."
I'm in the process of putting together my 1st mission and I'm curious as to what this means.
Can you cite me an example of what would be "bad creativity" with generic art assets? Do you mean like building elaborate sets or differnt things out of generic building blocks, floors and walls etc? Is this generaly considered a bad idea in foundry author community?
My apologies if this is a question that is perhaps answered earlier in the thread or elsewhere on the forum. I'm relatively new here.
You have my respect for your contribution to this community.
Comments
RATINGS OUT OF 5 - 28/5/11
- Gameplay 4
- Trek 4
- Design 3
- Difficulty 2
- Grind 1
THOUGHTS : This mission knocked my socks of. A great diplomatic type mission to join the ranks of Conjoined. This mission is an adventure. Vibrantly designed, well written and great characters. If there is anything wrong with it, it ends. *****/Stars.Comment:
Absolutely loved it. A great diplomatic mission filled with adventure. |Gameplay 4|Trek 4|Design 3|Difficulty 2|Grind 1| ***** STARS
Critical Analysis
Description I like the little notes towards Dialog heavy etc... If it can fit it is always nice to put in the mission location in green as well.
Mission Accept Box Green text amongst the Dialog is ugly. Use the Mission prompt text wisely and separate from the Dialog text. The optional extra bit, should be optional. Use Adv Dialog.
First Thoughts On the way to the mission I'm excited by the fact that this mission may tickle my Trek bone. Sounds like something a Starfleet vessel would be called to assist in.
1st Door Helm slow to impulse is not a great door interact text for foundry. Your mission might not be the only one in the players mission list. Using [Mission : Title] or [Enter Renorilliax] is preferable. Pluss the pop up needs more story dialog driven content.
Maps:
Renorilliax Space Wow great first map. Scan location needed for first interaction in your mission. Preferably a Blinking satellite pod.
Red Mist Tavern Yah eye candy. The dabo table looks a little out of place and you could probably get away with an atmospheric effect in here too. Red mist .
Renorilliax Ground The first conflict should be optional. It doesn't advance the story line so it shouldn't be mandatory. Let me decide whether to engage them or sneak around them.
Library Door looks out of place. Klingon or Romulun would be preferred. Or other suggestions towards federation design need to be implemented.
Renorilliax Ground 2 Scan location please. No v no Vvvvvvv.
Tunnels This feels like a federation vessel, rather than tunnels.
Renorilliax Ground 3 Loved it.
Objectives:
Scan the beam in location - People will immediately press v. Great way to use the players interface/keyboard for doing interactive story elements.
Find the Library I shouldn't have to open up my map to find the objective. Once again enemies should be optional.
Enter library Basement Doesn't feel like I'm entering a basement. Enter library should suffice.
Access tunnels Doesn't feel like a tunnels. Needs more fighting going on. Friendly NPC's would be nice.
Story:
1.I'd put the mission Briefing in the 1st popup dialog box and optional extra content in the mission 1st door map transition box.
2.Dialog is great, however I don't feel a part of the story. Break it up in the Adv dialog design. 1st stream quick and to the point, 2nd optional humor or extra character driven and 3rd more details towards the story.
3.Questioning the prisoner could be a puzzle type popup to make it feel more like an interrogation.
4.Confront the rebel leaders I have know idea what is going on. One minute something is happening than another and the out come is unsure as towards where the story is heading me or where the next map transition will take me. It feels like I have completed the mission, but I have another map? It's a shame because up until now it's been an amazing ride.
Design:
Transporter pad Use a trigger to make the light effects appear once I'm on the pad.
Towurnow If she is to be in the open, put here in the light.
You can also use Map transitions as interact with object. Most of your map Transition dialog feels forced text. This might help.
Note To Author:
I have designed you a banner and plan to advertise this mission at StarbaseUGC. Please let me know if this goes against your wishes. The Winter of Our Discontent BANNER.
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Winaprise Ep 3: Arrival By OptimusLGhttp://forums.startrekonline.com/showpost.php?p=3574662&postcount=145
"Give Peace a Chance" By Futurecaptain http://forums.startrekonline.com/showpost.php?p=3574698&postcount=146
Would really appreciate your feedback on a mission!
TITLE : Alpha Shock
AUTHOR : P90James
CODE : ST-HRT4YPETV
LEVEL : 43+ (for access to Borg sector)
LOCATION : Sibiran System, Gamma Orionis
LENGTH : Approx 30 mins
TAGS : Fed
There is a previous mission in the chain, Taskforce Alpha also starting in the same location. If you want to run it also it's quite short, 15-20 mins tops.
Thanks!!
Thanks.
Commodore_Stipe
No problem. It is an amazing mission. I have added it to The Away Team Report now on the main page at StarbaseUGC.
Thanks for all your efforts and great reviews. Here is a summary of my mission. I appreicate your feedback.
TITLE : Project Echo: A Lost Reflection
AUTHOR : rfrance
CODE : ST-HCHA65GXS
LEVEL : 16+
LOCATION : Elvren System of Alpha Centauri Sector.
LENGTH : 1 - 1.5 hr
TAGS : FED, puzzles, combat, story, ground, space, role-play, powers, optional
DESCRIPTION :
Starfleet Command has lost contact with the U.S.S. Reflection while conducting experiments of a new prototype system called Project Echo. You are being sent to investigate and determine the fate of the ship near the Elvren System of Alpha Centauri Sector.
Key Features:
* Averages 1 to 1.50 hours with mix of story and combat. Written in the 'trek' style.
* Optional objectives and multiple paths!
* Unique and challenging puzzles. Ask your officers for help or hints as needed. Or just skip entirely!
* Multiple endings!
* New abilities you can actually use on ground and in space!
* For best role-play experience, include all roles in your away team.
* Play tested and supported at various difficulties including Elite.
LINKS :
Description Needs a starting location in green. This is not a mission brief window, this is where your supposed to sell your mission to the public.
Mission Accept Box This is were your mission brief should be. I can't see a sector location in green on either your description box or your accept mission popup.
First Thoughts Annoyed by the fact that I had to assume the mission started in the Gamma Orionis Sector Block. Also annoyed by the fact that I can pick up the mission, however my Rear Admiral Character can't access Gamma Orionis.
1st Door Thats all good for this system.
Maps:
1.SB82 Well the patrol like story and the constant pop ups make this map a hell of a grind.
2.USS Procyon Deck 8 The STO intor mission was more entertaining then this. The borg don't even have life. They need animations. They wouldn't just be standing around waiting to be killed. You can't even run the gantlet, you force the player to kill every single on of them and offer no eye candy or entertaining story.
3.SB82#2 Your going to make me fly all the way back. OMG it's like playing Farmville. The Scanner also takes me to a Platform and not the Starbase.
Objectives:
Story:
1.You need to either use Adv Dialog to cut down on the dialog or split it up for those of us that hate to read or make it more interesting, rather then so regimented. The dialog is no more entertaining then reading the objectives.
2.
Design:
I've gotten to a point where I'm not even reading the dialog, because I don't have to. There is nothing in the interaction in this mission that need more explanation than what I am experiencing.
TITLE : Taskforce Alpha
AUTHOR : P90James
CODE : ST - HLAJE6YLN
LEVEL :
LOCATION : Sibiran System, Gamma Orionis
LENGTH : Approx 30 mins
TAGS : Fed
DESCRIPTION :
LINKS :
Comment - This is a top notch first attempt mission. It is driven by meaning ess tasks that make it feel Grindish, but has what we want STO to be. You are the captain in this mission. |Gameplay 2|Trek 4|Design 2|Difficulty 3.5|Grind 3.5|
RATINGS OUT OF 5 - 27/5/11
- Gameplay 2
- Trek 4
- Design 2
- Difficulty 3.5
- Grind 3.5
THOUGHTS : This mission would have been quite popular in the Early Foundry tribble days, however It doesn't hold it's own with the advancement of Foundry authoring. What this mission doesn't offer in excitement it makes up in vision towards how allot of people would like STO to be played. This is a top notch fist mission attempt ***/Stars.TITLE : The Hunt for Peace
AUTHOR : Pinecone3
CODE : ST-HMNKI6SK6
LEVEL : 16+
LOCATION : Hadrian System of Alpha Centauri Sector.
LENGTH : 20-30 Minutes
TAGS : FED, Cryptic Mission Tie-ins, Pseudo Class Based Objectives, Re-skining
DESCRIPTION : A Romulan Colony, after the dissappearance of Empress Sela, has broken away from the empire to do private buisness and adopt a less agressive policy towards the Federation. The empire ignores this, until discovering that the colony has been providing sanctuary to Reman rebels. Angered, the Empire provides their Hirogen allies with the location of the colony, a prime hunting target. In desperation, the colony requests Starfleet assistace. Go to the Hadrian System in the Alpha Centauri Block.
Oh, and BTW, my old mission "Peace is Weak" no longer exists. so don't worry about rating that one.
TITLE : Plato's Grandchildren
AUTHOR : Raptorwalker
CODE : ST-HLYK79EDN
LEVEL : Any
LOCATION : Veela, Regulus sector
LENGTH : 10-15 minutes
TAGS : FED
DESCRIPTION : A cryptic message is intercepted from what was thought to be an uninhabited system. Your ship is sent to investigate the source of the message.
LINKS : See banner below \/
TITLE : Alpha Shock
AUTHOR : P90James
CODE : ST-HRT4YPETV
LEVEL : 43+ (for access to Borg sector)
LOCATION : Sibiran System, Gamma Orionis
LENGTH : Approx 30 mins
TAGS : Fed
DESCRIPTION :
LINKS :
RATINGS OUT OF 5 - 27/5/11
Gameplay 2.5
Trek 3
Design 3
Difficulty 4
Grind 4
THOUGHTS : This mission is great if you like Borg and want to play more content like Infected. Unfortunately it feels like other missions I've played on STO peaced together. This has a nostalgic feel, but for those of us looking for something new and mysterious this mission falls short of a quarter.***/Stars.
Description Boy oh boy, where do I start. After playing the last one the description doesn't really give me much anxiousness towards playing.
Mission Accept Box This could have a little more in it. Such as what I'm to expect or anticipate from possibly the Borg.
First Thoughts Well seeing as though the first mission was about as entertaining as the STO Tutorial this mission better knock the socks of me. Assuming this one is better than the first because you would have become more skilled, the first one will probably not do it justice.
1st Door
Maps:
1.SB82 EXT, This is too much. Your practically doing exactly the same scenario. Yes the story has been tweaked, but it's still go here shoot Borg.
2.Outpost Gamma Six This is a fun map but the story lacks.
3.Interior. Enemies too hard for a standard Foundry mission. Unless your want it to be more fleet action or STF Style.
4.Lower Level. Ran the gantlet. You can't expect anyone to fight through all those groups. I'd prefer to be doing infected.
5.Deck 63 Short and sweet why the north and south search. Just another hint at plagiarism towards cryptic missions. Make the maps your own.
6.This is not a good end, atleast make the map Transition worth while.
Objectives:
Story:
1.now your Probably wondering what your orders are. These shoul of been in the Accept mission dialog box.
2. Oh a delegation. Now you have a story. Damn your going to have be beam down and fight through Borg to get to something.
Design:
Comment There is nothing in this mission you have not or can not play in STO general content.|Gameplay 2.5|Trek 3|Design 3|Difficulty 4|Grind 4|
TITLE : Sorti Rising
AUTHOR : Commodore_Stipe
CODE :
LEVEL : 31+l
LOCATION :
LENGTH :
TAGS : Fed
DESCRIPTION : You are sent to Sorti Prime to conduct final evaluations for it's application for Federation membership. However, Federation politics and a well kept secret make your choices difficult. The final outcome is up to you. This mission has multiple endings based on your decisions.
LINKS :
RATINGS OUT OF 5 - 27/5/11
Gameplay 3
Trek 3
Design 3
Difficulty 3
Grind 4
THOUGHTS : There is so much to this mission. Unfortunately the authors ability to entertain the player within his plot line is lacking. People who love delving into a new species and love foundry not necessarily for the game play may enjoy this mission. An exploration with far to much thought.****/Stars.
Description Start location in green missing.
Mission Accept Box Mabey an indication to the location being below the promenade so people don't go though all the upper level platforms at ESD. Also a hint to meeting your senior staff there.
First Thoughts I like the fact that it's at ESD.
1st Door Thats all good for this system. [Lets Go See What She Wants] Try [Enter: Sorti Rising] or Enter what's her names office.
Maps:
1.Office Flag at 0 coordinate. A chair is facing the wrong way.
2.Bridge I think I might need some crew.
3.Sorti System # 2 Too short waste of map transitions.
4.Hydra Station. Consoles in weird positions.
5.S'trin Base- Boy oh boy are the wild life fit on this planet.
6.Unknown Cave. - Up until this point has been your Prelude to a crisis, which should be 2 maps at most.
7.Sorti System Well With out the story I might have a clue as too which faction I liked most, however Due to the long massive pointless prelude to this mission. I can't seem to recall any of the main point in this mission. The advancement of the plotline needs more emphasis.
8.Hydra map Yes finaly this is what I'm talking about. Get me into this type of game play sooner.
Objectives:
Enter Sorti System should be approach Sorti prime or station.
Sirellia Compound Most over used map in Foundry.
Story:
1.In the office you need Advance dialog. I was enjoying getting into the story. But then it was like popup after popup. Boy oh boy kill me now.
2.Bridge Computer was a nice optional. However I would of liked to do a bit more on this map. Otherwise just have me go straight to the ready room. Rather than give me a bridge that looks nothing like mine.
3.I just don't really care about this race. More visuals of there culture and planet would have been preferable to an Interior. Then when I actually get down to the planet the first thing I see is a distinctively Vulcan building.
4.I can see allot of content going a miss because I'm only following Objectives. Make your worlds more original and focus on Eye candy and none obvious objectives in this kind of mission.
5.I'm a mutant. Now this part of the story I want more info on. You give so much info on other stuff that doesn't advance the plot line and don't explain this story element.
Design:
There are many consoles that you can see inside of because there not flush on a wall.
You need to check the wander. Speed 5 slow walk 10 fast walk 15 jog 20 sprint, anything higher is only for the Fantastic 4 or Green Lanter.
Comment - I would of given this three stars, but the author has put allot of work into it. More polish needed. By the time the enjoyment of this mission kicked in, I had Lost interest. |Gameplay 3|Trek 3|Design 3|Difficulty 3|Grind 4|
TITLE : Project Echo: A Lost Reflection
AUTHOR : rfrance
CODE : ST-HCHA65GXS
LEVEL : 16+
LOCATION : Elvren System of Alpha Centauri Sector.
LENGTH : 1 - 1.5 hr
TAGS : FED, puzzles, combat, story, ground, space, role-play, powers, optional
DESCRIPTION : Starfleet Command has lost contact with the U.S.S. Reflection while conducting experiments of a new prototype system called Project Echo. You are being sent to investigate and determine the fate of the ship near the Elvren System of Alpha Centauri Sector.
Key Features:
* Averages 1 to 1.50 hours with mix of story and combat. Written in the 'trek' style.
* Optional objectives and multiple paths!
* Unique and challenging puzzles. Ask your officers for help or hints as needed. Or just skip entirely!
* Multiple endings!
* New abilities you can actually use on ground and in space!
* For best role-play experience, include all roles in your away team.
* Play tested and supported at various difficulties including Elite.
LINKS :http://i1229.photobucket.com/albums/ee464/rfrance74/ProjectEcho-Reflection-1.jpg
_______
RATINGS OUT OF 5
Gameplay 4
Trek 4
Design 4
Difficulty 3
Grind 3
THOUGHTS : An extremely enjoyable mission with optional objectives. It doesn't have the exploration and new world factor of other great foundry missions, but the most competent save the ship and explore a ship interior mission I've come across. The journey is the key and this one doesn't miss a beat. *****/Stars.
Description Hallaloo yah....
Mission Accept Box Perhaps the personal thing could be in ooc and in a pop up at the end of the mission. I like to get my brief in the accept mission dialog box. I need to have a little bit about how the story starts to click on that box.
First Thoughts Yah a Rfrance mission. My expectations are high and I finally get to play one of them. People have told me that your Foundry style is much like mine. So hopefully I like what I create.
1st Door Excellent. 3 stars before I even start the mission.
Maps:
1.Capa System Map doesn't map sense Theoretically. But aesthetically pleasing.
2.Shuttle bay Not much for a Map transition, didn't hinder on my enjoyment.
Objectives:
I lost my reflexion. I'm not a huge fan of personal Objective text.
Ahha nice use of optional content.
Hmm Romulan's Kill them. I would of liked to try and hail them or have a conversation with them.
Take Turbo lift. Have the map transition from a reach marker. Or at least don't use the entire turbo lift as an interact with object.
Love the Puzzel but bypassed it. Couldn't be bothered to learn what I have to do. But well installed.
So far the only mission I have played were I have actually enjoyed one map objectives before transitions.
Story:
1.Engineering was epic.
2.Hmm Now why would the Romulan officer appear on my tricorder?
Design:
Conference room feels naked. There many other maps you could use with windows. Just doesn't feel like the classic trek conference room.
Enemy contacts in Indaga map got stuck on Asteroid.
Loved the cut scene. Excellent Generations reference.
On the Interior of the Reflexion, Markers need to be move further away from enemies, because I keep seeing Romulan's beam in.
Comment -Still needs some polish on the last map, with the optional objectives, but this mission is an amazing triumph . |Gameplay 4|Trek 4|Design 4|Difficulty 3|Grind 2|
I'd love to hear your input on my mission series, "Winaprise." Now that I have five missions out there, it's time for some real constructive criticism!
Please note that episodes 4 and 5 are published, but still in the review process.
TITLE : Winaprise Ep 1: Hollow Profits
AUTHOR : OptimusLG
CODE : ST-HUYI2TQLQ
LEVEL : Any
LOCATION : Korvat System (Pi Canis)
LENGTH : 15-30 mins
TAGS : FED, COM, GND, SPC
DESCRIPTION : You have been chosen to assist in the new Starship Reclamation Initiative, an experimental program designed to retrieve damaged halves of Galaxy-Class starships and combine them to create new, functional Galaxy-Class ships. Your first task is to prepare the engineering hull of the U.S.S. Winnipeg for the first test of this new Initiative.
TITLE : Winaprise Ep 2: Resurrection
AUTHOR : OptimusLG
CODE : ST-HAGKR6H3V
LEVEL : Any
LOCATION : Earth Spacedock
LENGTH : 15-30 mins
TAGS : FED, COM, GND, SPC
DESCRIPTION : Now that you've successfully brought in a Galaxy-Class engineering hull, it's time to find a saucer. A legendary starship that crash-landed on a distant planet years ago is your target, but retrieving it may not be a simple task.
TITLE : Winaprise Ep 3: Arrival
AUTHOR : OptimusLG
CODE : ST-HHB7FWK7C
LEVEL : Any
LOCATION : Earth Spacedock
LENGTH : 15-30 mins
TAGS : FED, DIP, GND, PZL
DESCRIPTION : Admiral Smith's Starship Reclamation Initiative is in danger of being shut down if he can't find a crew to man the test ship. Just as he's about to call it quits, new information about Utopia Planitia's mysterious visitors could give Admiral Smith just what he needs to continue his pet project.
TITLE : Winaprise Ep 4: Fixer-Upper
AUTHOR : OptimusLG
CODE : ST-HFRRXU5XO
LEVEL : 31+
LOCATION : Earth Spacedock
LENGTH : 15-30 mins
TAGS : FED, DIP, GND, PZL
DESCRIPTION : Now that the Winaprise has a crew, they are hard at work preparing the ship to leave spacedock. After beaming aboard to help with system modifications, you learn that the ship may not be the only thing that needs attention.
TITLE : Winaprise Ep 5: Enter the Pugatu
AUTHOR : OptimusLG
CODE : ST-HAOG6VZMO
LEVEL : Any
LOCATION : Donia System (Sirius)
LENGTH : 15-30 mins
TAGS : FED, COM, GND, SPC, PZL
DESCRIPTION : The crew of the Winaprise needs your help once more as their first mission takes an unexpected turn. The research station they were sent to assist seems to have been abandoned, but there is evidence of foul play...
Thanks so much!
I offer my first of three missions for your review:
Title: "Give Peace a Chance"
ID: ST-HEKVFM75X
Author: Futurecaptain
Allegience: Starfleet
Level: 41+
Location: Deep Space K-7 from sector space.
Duration: 20-30 mins
Description: The Gorn have long maintained that much of the Alpha and Beta Quadrants belong to them. While this ideaology has persisted there are some Gorn who wish to see a change. We have planned a peace conference with just such a Gorn to see what we need to accomplish to achieve peace. We have a rare opportunity here, we must take full advantage.
Thank you in advance, I look forward to your feedback!
TITLE : The Hunt for Peace
AUTHOR : Pinecone3
CODE : ST-HMNKI6SK6
LEVEL : 16+
LOCATION : Hadrian System of Alpha Centauri Sector.
LENGTH : 20-30 Minutes
TAGS : FED, Cryptic Mission Tie-ins, Pseudo Class Based Objectives, Re-skining
DESCRIPTION : A Romulan Colony, after the dissappearance of Empress Sela, has broken away from the empire to do private buisness and adopt a less agressive policy towards the Federation. The empire ignores this, until discovering that the colony has been providing sanctuary to Reman rebels. Angered, the Empire provides their Hirogen allies with the location of the colony, a prime hunting target. In desperation, the colony requests Starfleet assistace. Go to the Hadrian System in the Alpha Centauri Block.
RATINGS OUT OF 5
Gameplay 4
Trek 3
Design 3
Difficulty 2
Grind 1
THOUGHTS : This takes me back to the day when I played Syndicate Extraction on Tribble before Triggers. I loved this mission and that one because of it's simple story and well executed gameplay. Another great mission that ticks all the boxes by not trying to be more than it is. ****/Stars.
Description Go to the Hadrian System in the Alpha Centauri Block. Needs to be in Green. [Mission info/]
Mission Accept Box This is a briefing box. After the first accept box you can put additional information. Eg, The [shipname] is ordered to the Hadrian system in the alpha etc, there has been a transmission, you need to do this and look out for that. Then popup of transmission and other extra content. Be mind ful players might not pick up your mission while in sector space.
First Thoughts There looks to be an interesting story here. However the non generic custom of your mission accept box has me questioning your competence as an author. So far a 2 star mission. It's nice being sent somewhere I haven't been in a while.
1st Door
Maps:
1.Hadrian System Grind straight of the bat. Can't I just do a general scan of the whole area.
2.Ground was great. Straight to the action.
3.Romulan Cave great mix of enemies. Would of liked to of heard the Hirogens side to the story.
4.Bridge Give me more to do here, the Trait puzzle is great. This map could use some personal customization.
5.Hadrian system #2 never have a battle straight out of a map transition. To much lag and If you have paused the map transition to do other stuff on your PC the battle will be over before I press any key to continue.
Objectives:
Story:
1.By having the Hirogen near the moon it feels like I'm going to hunt them down. Have them warp in after speech bubble.
2.Map transition box beam down point less. Move the last pop up box to replace it. Prepare away team in continue box. x2
Design:
Comment -A mission that gets back to basics. Simple, entertaining and doesn't try to be more than it is. |Gameplay 4|Trek 3|Design 3|Difficulty 2|Grind 1|
TITLE : Plato's Grandchildren
AUTHOR : Raptorwalker
CODE : ST-HLYK79EDN
LEVEL : Any
LOCATION : Veela, Regulus sector
LENGTH : 10-15 minutes
TAGS : FED
DESCRIPTION : A cryptic message is intercepted from what was thought to be an uninhabited system. Your ship is sent to investigate the source of the message.
LINKS : http://i1081.photobucket.com/albums/j346/raptorwalker/Platosgrand.jpg
RATINGS OUT OF 5
Gameplay 4.5
Trek 4
Design 3.5
Difficulty 1
Grind 1
THOUGHTS : This is amazingly fun. Not the most original story, but well exectuted. Very rare to find simple and well developed Foundry missions. An Author to look out for. *****/Stars.
Description Mission location in green please.
Mission Accept Box Liked it. But more of a Cryptic STO Brief would be nice.
First Thoughts I finally get to play a mission on one of my new toons. Level 7. I have been looking forward to this mission for a while. Hope it's not TOS related and I don't regret buying the TOS pack for my new character instead of the ENT pack.
1st Door I have two options here, Preferably change it to [Mission: Plato's GrandChild.] The popup could use abit of a brief about what long range scans in the area show.
Maps:
1.System p-284 Great map. Waste of a map transition though. Hate pointless map transition text. Move the last popup to replace it then Prepare away team as the continue text.
2.Smuggler Settlement Love this map. Finally an author used it.
3.Luthars compounds. A bit big and needs more reason. They wouldn't build big rooms like this for no reason. Some Drilling peaces would be nice. Maybe lower the roof with platforms. Make it darker and smaller in some parts.
Objectives:
Three more objects. Is my Engineer incompetent?
1st scan was good lead that to the other two and then have the last one as a separate objective so the Orions warp in onto of me. Preferably at the derelict station.
Jason Wyhn is in a confusing place when trying to hit the reach marker properly. Just have an Interact with contact instead of a reach marker objective.
Defeat Luthars Guards. The third group need moving. I missed them and was ready to shot the last group and shot at them thought the wall.
Story:
1.Some info on the derelict shipyard would be nice using map placed Popup.
2.Feeding the landing coordinace? My klingon Engineer must be feeling perish after his ale last night.
3.Can I use Glaf in one of my missions.
Design:
There are Klingon Grate platforms you could use as a shaft.
I would of liked to disable Luthar before he talked. Use one of the costumes with little or no visuals and put it in an invisible object on top of Luthar or beneath him. This trick comes from Napoleon_Blowapart for anyone who wants to use it.
Comment - |Wow two simple and great mission in one day. This is classy, polished and fun. Realy captures this authors potential as well as the Foundry tool. |Gameplay 4.5|Trek 4|Design 3.5|Difficulty 1|Grind 1|
Please post any other of your missions once ready for a critic.
TITLE : Winaprise Ep 1: Hollow Profits
AUTHOR : OptimusLG
CODE : ST-HUYI2TQLQ
LEVEL : Any
LOCATION : Korvat System (Pi Canis)
LENGTH : 15-30 mins
TAGS : FED, COM, GND, SPC
DESCRIPTION : You have been chosen to assist in the new Starship Reclamation Initiative, an experimental program designed to retrieve damaged halves of Galaxy-Class starships and combine them to create new, functional Galaxy-Class ships. Your first task is to prepare the engineering hull of the U.S.S. Winnipeg for the first test of this new Initiative.
RATINGS OUT OF 5
Gameplay 4
Trek 3
Design 3
Difficulty 3
Grind 2
THOUGHTS : An excellent start to hopefully a repetitive but equally entertaining series. Another great quick mission that has been well executed. Story, Enemies and Exploration are all well situated on an equilateral triangle when it comes to this mission. ****/Stars.
Description You could tie this into the Outreach program given in the early stages of STO. Add start location in green please.
Mission Accept Box Great breif, however the mission may seem far fetched only limiting the parts to galxy class ships.
First Thoughts Another mission to play on my newer toons. Excellent. Hopeing this is a good mission so I will be inspired to play the rest of the series. If not you will have to submit each episode seperately to give others a chance to que there missions in my list.
1st Door [Enter Korvat system] Any level mission. Might have more than one listed in this system try [Mission : Title]. More info on what to expect needed. What crisis may I be beaming into.
Maps:
1.Winnipeg Interior. Make all klingon holograms optional.
2.Winipeg Battle Bridge. There are holograms standing on consoles. The group is way to hard to defeat by myself. Can I beam in assistance please.
Objectives:
Pi Canis needs to be added to your first objective if it's not a level restricted mission.
Story:
1.Why a Cardassian terminal instead of a Klingon one.
2.A Ferengi would not confess or agree to knowing or having anything to do with this without persuasion. Would I not arrest him for something?
Design:
Need v to scan when entering the map please. Use Blinking satellite and have it disappear when I approach.
Reach marker on the Winnipeg is too small.
Don't keep me waiting for popups after I kill an enemy. Use reach markers.
On the Winnipeg have all klingon's optional and have them only appear if I try to enter the rooms through a door.
Comment - I just can't get over these quick simple missions. Enjoyed! Gameplay 4|Trek 3|Design 3|Difficulty 3|Grind 2|
TITLE : Winaprise Ep 2: Resurrection
AUTHOR : OptimusLG
CODE : ST-HAGKR6H3V
LEVEL : Any
LOCATION : Earth Spacedock
LENGTH : 15-30 mins
TAGS : FED, COM, GND, SPC
DESCRIPTION : Now that you've successfully brought in a Galaxy-Class engineering hull, it's time to find a saucer. A legendary starship that crash-landed on a distant planet years ago is your target, but retrieving it may not be a simple task.
RATINGS OUT OF 5
Gameplay 3.5
Trek 3.5
Design 3
Difficulty 3
Grind 2
THOUGHTS : A mission with a lot of potential, but basically a great patrol mission with an amazing ST: Generations reference. Another great addition to the series but needs more work polish and plot lines. ***/Stars.
Description Description then mission location in green.
Mission Accept Box Directions in yellow mission location in green.
First Thoughts Nice reference to Generations. And I like the fact I can use my Transwarp after the last mission.
1st Door Veridian System needs to be = Access terminal outside ESD Transporter room. Also to start from this location with receive co ordinance seems pointless. Perhaps I can have a conversation with Quins secretary. And then I'm there.
Maps:
1.Veridian iii map transition to this location needs work. Beam to ready room research the USS Enterprise, Ncc-1701-D.
2.Veridian surface There is so much potential story missing here.
3.Enterprise d Bridge, Love it, but floating grass?
4.Admirals office. Platform sticking out of wall?
Objectives:
Modify transporter needs more information. Okay and then suddenly the office is field with civilians.
Story:
1.I think it's a bit late to be worrying about the local ecosystem.
2.Why would there be theta radiation? You need to research your time line. Also why would the debris still be smoky.
3.Would of liked to try and negotiate with the aliens. If negotiation fails enemies beam in. Or set phasers to stun.
4.I want more story from the Enemy. Possibly they were collecting the Theta for a use on there power generator aboard a ship of planet. Other wise this mission is the saucer of The Enterprise in a patrol mission. Besides the fact that it belongs in a museum.
5.Cliff hanger sucks. Hate missions that don't stand on it's own.
Design:
Enemy should fight like the Dominion Jem'adar.
Have the scan 8 debris objects as separate objectives so I can follow them in order rather than having to run all over the map.
Would of liked to ask my crew to do most of the stuff aboard the bridge and do it myself as optional.
A debis Saucer would have been more accurate.
Comment - What a shame, this mission has 5 star potential. Needs more information on events and enemies other wise it leaves your with an unsatisfactory cliff hanger. |Gameplay 3.5|Trek 3.5|Design 3|Difficulty 2|Grind 2|
Thanks for the review. I am, however, going to refute some of your points.
1) In the Councilor's office you state I should use Advanced dialouge. Guess what. I did. There isn't a single pop-up in that section of the story. I can even screen shot the UGC editor if you want to prove it.
2) Given that there is not very many generic componets to the Foundry assets let alone that would match my vision of this culture I actaully think I did well. It's hard to give visuals when the Foundry limits my abilities due to the fact I was trying not to use obvious pieces belonging to the core groups. Yes I used several Vulcan buildings. I did so because they are made of wood. A sustainable, renewable resource on a planet who's surface was devestated by a nuclear war and where non-renewable resources were hard to come by. It actually makes sense with they way they re-fashioned themselves.
3) Make my world more original? You have to be kidding me right? This entire story and all the maps except one, were built from scratch. Only the Hydra station map used to rescue the hostages was pre-built and I used that because it fit perfect for my vision. Again orginality is limited by the Foundry assets available. The entire compound, with the exception of the central Vulcan temple and the outlying buildings, is as generic and different as I could find in the Foundry.
4) Sadly, objectives are the only way to move the stories along. You have to do something on a map to even transition to it. However, if you choose to ignore the fact that in the two places I wanted you to look around first, by actually telling you to do so, then I can't be responsible for that.
5) The first Sorti system map is not a waste. It serves a purpose. If you bother flying around you will find a clue that plays into the story. Second, you will understand the layout of the system for the second go around when you actually have some fighting and rescuing to do.
6) Your comment about many consoles not being flush witht the wall is quite interesting. I would challenge you to define many. Mainly because I placed at most 4 consoles that could be considered needing to be against a wall. All of those are in the diplomatic center. The conoles in the mine are designed to be in the middle of rooms. The rest of the consoles are pre-placed as part of the maps.
7) The prelude is hardly pointless. The only long part I let you skip if you wish. Everything else is part of building up the story. You see the true mission is to evaluate Sorti for admission. Everything else just complicates your life. Without the background you can't make an informed choice. YOu play as a Starfleet Captain. In each and every episode I have ever watched Picard, Kirk, and the like always sought every piece of infomration they could get. It takes time to deliver that kind of information.
8) This mission is long, and it is wordy. However, it is a diplomatic mission at heart. Over the year and a half since launch there have been a number forum posts about wanting more exploration and diplomacy type missions. This mission is an attempt, and by others reviews a good one, to do that. If it is not you cup of tea fine. However, I stand by my design.
9) I will grant you I need to tone down the wander on the critters I just haven't gotten around to it yet.
Sorry to be so long winded by I put a lot of thought an work into this mission and felt justified in answering back to a few of your thoughts.
TITLE : Winaprise Ep 3: Arrival
AUTHOR : OptimusLG
CODE : ST-HHB7FWK7C
LEVEL : Any
LOCATION : Earth Spacedock
LENGTH : 15-30 mins
TAGS : FED, DIP, GND, PZL
DESCRIPTION : Admiral Smith's Starship Reclamation Initiative is in danger of being shut down if he can't find a crew to man the test ship. Just as he's about to call it quits, new information about Utopia Planitia's mysterious visitors could give Admiral Smith just what he needs to continue his pet project.
RATINGS OUT OF 5
Gameplay 2.5
Trek 2
Design 2.5
Difficulty 1
Grind 3
THOUGHTS : Well to a series well started, it now ends with my interest and a ridiculous story as well as plot holes. Author needs a lesson in story telling. His ability to keep his mission interesting is very well executed, but falls short by not giving the player an explanation within script towards his story elements. ***/Stars.
Description Once again location format needs work.
Mission Accept Box Thats all good but the console again. Then start at a system. I bet the 3rd and 2nd Could be incorporated into one mission.
First Thoughts I can't help but think your series could be a good Starfleet Academy mission series. Eithur as a training mission in a Holodeck or part of the volunteer cadet Outreach Program.
1st Door Needs work. Look to previous reviews.
Maps:
1.Science lab A room of consoles with no purpose?
2.Holodeck, feels like I'm killing these enemy just to get on with the story which there currently isn't any.
3.
Objectives:
Story:
1.2011 high school students? Really? Damn you had me now you've given me more plot holes with out circumstance. I still want to know who the enemy was that attacked me on the planet, don't give me more plot satire until you've at least given me a hint.
2.So far I can see that you've just written this series of the top of your head without future planning.
3.I hope these students have an historical or Trek reference other wise there is no point in forcing me to talk to all of them. Grind?
4.Oh my Blooming Greed, this puzzle is ridiculous, besides the fact that I had to get a pen and paper to complete it there is a most annoying none plot line surrounding it.
5.A far fetch story with no reason and reality. Even within the STO Universe.
6.Combat Training would be the last thing on the list.
Design:
Talk to students needs to be optional.
Only have the puzzel revert back to were the player has completed up to in the puzzle.
Comment - Hmm, No reason to mysterious events makes this mission a satire. This authors style is slowly becoming don't explain what the audience wants to know more about.|Gameplay 2.5|Trek 2|Design 2.5|Difficulty 1|Grind 3|
Title: "Give Peace a Chance"
ID: ST-HEKVFM75X
Author: Futurecaptain
Allegience: Starfleet
Level: 41+
Location: Deep Space K-7 from sector space.
Duration: 20-30 mins
Description: The Gorn have long maintained that much of the Alpha and Beta Quadrants belong to them. While this ideaology has persisted there are some Gorn who wish to see a change. We have planned a peace conference with just such a Gorn to see what we need to accomplish to achieve peace. We have a rare opportunity here, we must take full advantage.
RATINGS OUT OF 5
Gameplay 3
Trek 2
Design 2.5
Difficulty 2
Grind 3
THOUGHTS : This mission is yet another take or rescue the diplomat. Unfortunately due to the Authors intention to do a series, this mission does not stand on it's own, nor influence me to play the sequel. It offers some fun combat and an enjoyable capture the bridge sequence, but other than that it is a grind and finds me wishing this competent author would start with something simple. ***/Stars.
Description Mission location in green missing.
Mission Accept Box Excellent another Trans warp mission start location.
First Thoughts Hmm oh no, another diplomatic conference. Lol...
1st Door Would of like more info on the popup.
Maps:
1.K7 space This doesn't look like the one in the real world of STO.
2.Bird of prey upper deck, big interior for such little ships.
Objectives:
Go to K7 System. Just spent 10minutes running around the station after a Trans Warp.
K7 Interior. Really! just copy Starbase 82's map.
Vulcan space Map transition needs to be previous dialog.
Return to Turbo lift. Are you kidding me. Advance the plotline, never make the player go back.
Check logs - why can't I do this in the captains office.
Story:
1.Why would the Vulcan's not have detected the ships in orbit?
2.Ship interior feels a bit like go here do this then that. Added with the K7 interior this is getting to be very grindy.
Design:
Why not start your mission on the K7 interior social zone?
Beginning of your story should be. Go to k7 space beam Gorn aboard, brief him in your ready room. Maybe he bought an Orion slave while at K7 or Drozona preferably. Maybe if it were on Drozona you would have to find him.
Why not use Gorn ships?
Never have a battle after a map Transition.
Comment - A poor start to a Foundry series. This mission does not stand on it's own, otherwise it would of been 4 stars. |Gameplay 3|Trek 2|Design 2.5|Difficulty 2|Grind 3|
No problems, that is why I gave you 4 stars instead of 3. All of what your arguing is up to you and still in your control. You asked for an opinion, I gave you my opinion and now you can choose what to do with it. I am most critical on the missions I want to enjoy, and this is one of them. As for diplomatic missions. "Conjoined" was one of my first reviews on Tribble and loved it. I did everything I could to publicise that mission and now its in most players top 5 foundry missions.
I'm not going to submit evidence to support my claims. As I hope your still working on this mission your more than welcome to resubmit it at a later date. I'm sure once you have done some play thoughts with players and got some others opinions I will enjoy the polished product and look forward to it.
Good luck.
James Cameron
"All criticism is good criticism, it's how I choice to use it that makes me a good director"
I understand that and I thank you. The console thing really bothers me though. As I said the only consoles I placed were in Hydra Station diplomatic center. I guess what I really wanted was where you were talking about because if it any other than those few I can do nothing about them as they are pre-placed. If you could clairfy that one issue I would be very thankful. For clarity I am talking about your statement regarding consoles being see-thru as they were not flush with the wall.
"Use artistic creativity with generic STO Implements."
I'm in the process of putting together my 1st mission and I'm curious as to what this means.
Can you cite me an example of what would be "bad creativity" with generic art assets? Do you mean like building elaborate sets or differnt things out of generic building blocks, floors and walls etc? Is this generaly considered a bad idea in foundry author community?
My apologies if this is a question that is perhaps answered earlier in the thread or elsewhere on the forum. I'm relatively new here.
You have my respect for your contribution to this community.