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This is a 1-Star Quest - Review Thread

zovyazovya Member, Neverwinter Beta Users, Neverwinter Hero Users, Neverwinter Guardian Users, Neverwinter Knight of the Feywild Users Posts: 0 Arc User
edited July 2013 in The Foundry
I, as a Public Service Announcement, have created a real 1-star quest. In hopes that other players can know what the baseline is for giving out 1 star ratings.

Check it out, it's short.

THIS is a 1-star quest - NW-DSQFVY6NM

Let me know how I might be able to make it worse.

Thanks!
Post edited by zovya on
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Comments

  • runis12runis12 Member, Neverwinter Beta Users Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    I haven't laughed so hard in a long time. :D
  • savaikunsavaikun Member Posts: 214 Bounty Hunter
    edited July 2013
    LOL! Too good to be true.
  • runebanerunebane Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    This was very funny.
    Halgarth's Legacy - NWS-DSTGFZHFR
  • dzogendzogen Member Posts: 550 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    Very funny. Watch this go to the best list.
    Dzogen, Moonstar Agent
    Bill's Tavern | The 27th Level | Secret Agent 34
  • saerraelsaerrael Member, Neverwinter Beta Users Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    zovya wrote: »
    I, as a Public Service Announcement, have created a real 1-star quest. In hopes that other players can know what the baseline is for giving out 1 star ratings.

    Check it out, it's short.

    THIS is a 1-star quest - NW-DSQFVY6NM

    Let me know how I might be able to make it worse.

    Thanks!

    This was hard... couldn't see **** due to the tears of laughter.
    And there was loot in the chest!


    ....no floating items, though? I missed them if they're there.
  • delthanindelthanin Member, Neverwinter Beta Users, Neverwinter Guardian Users, Neverwinter Knight of the Feywild Users Posts: 188 Bounty Hunter
    edited July 2013
    Did you have others beta run this quest before you even bothered to run it yourself on live? I think that's how these things are supposed to go.
  • mee2002mee2002 Member Posts: 100 Bounty Hunter
    edited July 2013
    I think it needs some floating objects/objects buried in walls or the floor. Plus the end chest should be all the way back at the beginning. The 3 elites were a nice touch though (and fun to kill!).
    NW-DPTTECLTF - Cindy Jones and the Holy Stein. A simple but hopefully entertaining foray into the world of Foundry.
  • sarkany69sarkany69 Member Posts: 59
    edited July 2013
    lol, too funny. too bad the skeletons don't say "For the Nashers"
    Campaign: NWS-DE986PLQS - Zombie Infestation
    NW-DIG3FBD2Q - Part 1 - Initial Attack - (Eligible for daily) Click here to see Video review by @Visigoth18
    NW-DNG6BTL9C - Part 2 - Retaliation - (Now daily eligible - thanks for the support everyone)
  • saerraelsaerrael Member, Neverwinter Beta Users Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    sarkany69 wrote: »
    lol, too funny. too bad the skeletons don't say "For the Nashers"

    This! (Made me laugh too, Sarkany.)
    Though it should be something like boars that scream "For the Nashers" for extra effect~
  • izatarizatar Member, NW M9 Playtest Posts: 1,161 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    Sadly, this quest is actually above average. First and foremost, it can be finished! More than half the 'for review' quests cannot be finished.

    Here are some problems I encountered while grinding through the beta reviewer achievement:

    1) Quest starts at a random place in rothe valley. The intro title is: "go to house". Carefully designed to have no golden path from Protector's enclave. Try every single place in the game until you find it.
    2) when you enter the quest, you spawn into the ground. You must /killme while jumping to start the quest
    3) the dungeon is indoor, but the mobs spawn in the ceiling, can only be killed by getting camera angled just right
    4) quest text in misspelled baby talk: "you goes teh DEMON and killed him!"
    5) teh DEMON is a stack of 20 ogres in a box..with a hole in it. you die instantly....
    6) ...only to respawn with your foot inside a wall. /killme and spam jump/move keys until you can get out! fun times!
    7) the end chest is protected by..an invisible maze! splendid!
  • guitarzan698guitarzan698 Member Posts: 384 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    This is just too f*n funny....
  • runebanerunebane Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    mee2002 wrote: »
    I think it needs some floating objects/objects buried in walls or the floor. Plus the end chest should be all the way back at the beginning. The 3 elites were a nice touch though (and fun to kill!).

    I totally expected him to say "Sorry but this one is mine, your chest is in room or something."
    izatar wrote: »
    Sadly, this quest is actually above average. First and foremost, it can be finished! More than half the 'for review' quests cannot be finished.

    This is true. The only quest I would ever give 1 star to are the ones that I can't complete to rate anyway.
    Halgarth's Legacy - NWS-DSTGFZHFR
  • shadowycanshadowycan Member, Neverwinter Beta Users Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    There's a trope for this kind of quest.
    May your souls cling to your body.
    http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/SoBadItsGood
  • lonnehartlonnehart Member Posts: 846 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    And to think I was gonna parody Bill's Tavern (it's my favorite Foundry quest due to its humor and Bill), and it would've used this trope...


    TV Tropes: Shoddy Knockoff Product

    :)
    *sings* "I like Gammera! He's so neat!!! He is full of turtle meat!!!"

    "Hah! You are doomed! You're only armed with that pathetic excuse for a musical instrument!!!" *the Savage Beast moments before Lonnehart the Bard used music to soothe him... then beat him to death with his Fat Lute*
  • wuhsinwuhsin Banned Users Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    I'll be sure to give this five stars. :p
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • redneckroninredneckronin Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    wuhsin wrote: »
    I'll be sure to give this five stars. :p

    Nice to see you back. I had thought the use of the Ban-Hammer totally unwarranted.

    All The Best
    Campaign: Call Of The Wild - Information, Links To Review Threads, Screenshots

    Looking For Reviews For Your Foundry Quest?
    Drop By Scribe's Enclave & Meet Up With Volunteer Reviewers.
  • zovyazovya Member, Neverwinter Beta Users, Neverwinter Hero Users, Neverwinter Guardian Users, Neverwinter Knight of the Feywild Users Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    dzogen wrote: »
    Very funny. Watch this go to the best list.

    Glad you liked it! Wouldn't it be sad if it did get on the best list? I only spent 2 hours on it. I think it will only appeal to authors however.

    Thanks for all the advice everyone. I think I'll add some floating barrels and maybe some furniture sticking in the wall.
  • zovyazovya Member, Neverwinter Beta Users, Neverwinter Hero Users, Neverwinter Guardian Users, Neverwinter Knight of the Feywild Users Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    Ok good. I just logged into the game. There's no chance of it ever getting on the best list. Seems it is only funny to authors, which was the point of it anyway.
  • sominatorsominator Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    Y'all are too funny. :P
    Proud member of Team Fencebane, official guild of the unofficial Neverwinter Adventure Hour!
  • karitrkaritr Member Posts: 662 Bounty Hunter
    edited July 2013
    Nice to see you back. I had thought the use of the Ban-Hammer totally unwarranted.

    All The Best

    Me too, until he let his kobold out to play.

    Still glad to see you back though Wuhsin.
    zovya wrote: »
    Glad you liked it! Wouldn't it be sad if it did get on the best list? I only spent 2 hours on it. I think it will only appeal to authors however.

    You're kidding right? Here is my feedback as played and starting from a baseline of 1 star...
    • Pathing from the enclave was correct. Star added. 2 stars.
    • Although we entered "next map" facing the wall, as others have pointed out, we would need to be stuck in the wall for a truly 1-star experience. No change.
    • Redeemed yourself slightly with the shadow effect...this is more like it. 1 star.
    • *groans* and then you fail again by picking a real cool and interesting looking "Boring" NPC. 2 stars.
    • And she knows that contractions need apostrophes! 3 stars.
    • Boring NPC does not respond as intended, lose a star...
    • ...however, roleplayers will appreciate the opportunity to ad lib the battle that ensues. Over many paragraphs. They may even be inspired to write fanfic involving the deeply meaningful love/hate relationship between their PC and "Honor". Max points added.
    • Most of the rooms were minimalist and I actually like that you threw in some work benches and utensils in a logical space to highlight the sparsity of the other rooms. I think others may penalise for this, but not me. Minus 1 star. (Back on track!). Four stars.
    • Bricked in windows that still let in light. Check. Three stars.
    • Impossible views from the windows upstairs. Minus 1 star.
    • Adding views at all. Plus 1 star. No change. Three stars.
    • Doorway overlapping window 'feature' - I can tell you've been listening to feedback :) Two stars!
    • A cat!...back to 5 stars you go Zovya.
    • Pathing to McGruffy was correct, but addressed once already. Sort this out.
    • Excellent use of placeholder labelling, only let down by your insistence in naming various other NPCs and allowing them spontaneous, repeating dialogue and animation. No change.
    • I'm going to give you the minus for out of place NPCs and because I am feeling especially generous I am also deducting a star for the cryptic and immersion-breaking "polakov41 a gagne un Destrier noir infernal lourd" message that flashed across my screen, not once but TWICE (!!), as I was about to speak to McGruffy. 3 stars.
    • McGruffy lets you down Zovya. You made the classic error of having a bartender offer us a refreshing beverage. 4 stars.
    • "What the hell?" This is what we want to see. Obstacles that serve no purpose other than to frustrate the player. With plagiaristic icing on top! 2 stars. (Nearly there).
    • Immune mobs, dressed up as bosses (my favourite touch!) that leave me injured at the campfire with a horribly long trek back to the objective, while hobbling. Minus, minus, minus.
    You made it. An incredible 1* experience...would be 0 stars if allowed :):):)
  • zovyazovya Member, Neverwinter Beta Users, Neverwinter Hero Users, Neverwinter Guardian Users, Neverwinter Knight of the Feywild Users Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    Haha, best review ever Karitr.
  • cipher9nemocipher9nemo Member, Neverwinter Beta Users Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    zovya wrote: »
    I, as a Public Service Announcement, have created a real 1-star quest. In hopes that other players can know what the baseline is for giving out 1 star ratings.

    Check it out, it's short.

    THIS is a 1-star quest - NW-DSQFVY6NM

    Let me know how I might be able to make it worse.

    Thanks!

    Awesome, LOL! I'll have to check it out. :)
    cipher_jitn_sig.png
    Hammerfist Clan. Jump into the Night: NW-DMXWRYTAD
  • karitrkaritr Member Posts: 662 Bounty Hunter
    edited July 2013
    zovya wrote: »
    Haha, best review ever Karitr.

    It was all your own wicked sense of humour, but glad you liked it.

    I only just made it too, blooming maintenance (and if I didn't tip, can we blame it on my rush to get out? :o).

    Oh, but just think of the stars you could have had deducted had I been unable to complete due to server downtime. It would have been glorious...

    As it was, I rated this a five!
  • ananvilhurtzananvilhurtz Member, Neverwinter Beta Users Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    You know, I don't think I've ever been this excited to review a quest.

    Can't wait to get home.
    Religion - 60 GF (15.3k GS)
    The Seeker - 60 DC (11.5k GS)
    Faithless - 60 CW (10k GS)
  • ananvilhurtzananvilhurtz Member, Neverwinter Beta Users Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    sominator wrote: »
    Y'all are too funny. :P

    sominator, I have an idea for next April fools. :D
    Religion - 60 GF (15.3k GS)
    The Seeker - 60 DC (11.5k GS)
    Faithless - 60 CW (10k GS)
  • lolsorhandlolsorhand Member, Neverwinter Beta Users, Neverwinter Hero Users, Neverwinter Knight of the Feywild Users Posts: 981 Bounty Hunter
    edited July 2013
    Think I have to try this out after a few other foundries, it does look epicly promising.
    I like turtles.

    Brethren of the Five, Campaign. - Story focused
    The Dwarven Tale - Hack 'N Slash
  • nyghomanyghoma Member Posts: 546 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    The irony is that most 1 star trolls will love this quest. <3 Zovya.
    tol-banner.png

    NW-DT4OV7EXH


    Every time they idiot-proof something...they make better idiots.
  • danielspicarddanielspicard Member, Neverwinter Beta Users Posts: 20 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    Ok
    I will rate it a 1 star when I done it haha.

    I noticed that someone said an invisible maze that will make it 5 stars mate.
  • crok2crok2 Member, Neverwinter Beta Users, Neverwinter Hero Users, Silverstars Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    I'm going to go ninja rate it 5 stars! THEN WHAT!?
  • xhritxhrit Member, Neverwinter Beta Users Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    1/5 Not enough sparkle overload. You should add a room where literally everything inside is selectable, and then give the player an objective to find something and pick it up.

    "Press F to Inspect Table" - >"You see a table. It is made of wood and is brown."
    "Press F to Inspect Fork" -> "You see a fork. It is on top of a table."
    "Press F to Inspect Plate" -> "You see a plate. It has half eaten food on it."
    "Press F to Inspect Painting" -> "You see a painting of Grampa Hatey. He died in the war."
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