One in the Pot - My first foundry mission

celticbass13

One in the Pot - NW-DGGFE9JEN

Hope you guys like it. Honestly, it's pretty short at the moment. Just looking for a little bit of a critique so I can tweak it and make it better.

delthanin

I'll give this a look tomorrow morning, after work.

celticbass13

Much appreciated.

delthanin

Just finished.

It's a decent first-time quest. Nothing was broken, at least on my playthrough. Encounters seemed fair.

A few technical issues, though (some spoilers ahead for anyone else who wants to play)
Put a little bit more information for your quest description. At the very least, should mention if it's a solo quest or meant to be played with multiple people.

For the fight next to the Rest area, you should place a 2nd NPC to represent the other werewolf that enters the fight. It feels sort of odd for him to come out of nowhere, right in the corner of that room. Same thing with the boss fight.

Some of the interactable objects need their names changed. They appear at the top of the dialogue/interact box. Examples:


As a side note, I'm not sure if blood splatter is only black for me, or if that's the case for everybody.

There's a couple of floating objects that you can't remove on the room interior you used. I actually use that same room in my quest. It's sort of annoying, and hopefully Cryptic fixes that at some point. For now, though, you need to put some objects there to make it look like it belongs there.



The house is sitting at an angle. If this is intentional, ignore me. It just feels odd since you stand upright once inside. If it's not intentionally at an angle, you should see about rotating it so that the house is level.

I'd like there to be more dialogue options when talking to Draven Wildcaller instead of just "Agreed. Start walking and I'll give you a five minute head start." I know you can choose an option to fight him with the next dialogue, but it's immersion breaking for people that don't feel their character would say that.

Overall, it's not bad. It just needs some polish, and really needs something more that'll grab players. As an exercise in learning the Foundry, though, this is a pretty good start. In its current state, I'd put it at a 3.6, but rounded up to 4 in-game.

Please don't take any of this the wrong way. I've seen a few brand new authors straight out give up because things weren't perfect to begin with, and that's nobody's intention when giving feedback. Some of the best feedback given to me pointed out a whole lot of flaws and bugs, and a few mentions of things that didn't quite make sense. I was rightfully given 3 stars at the time. Sorry if this is completely unneeded, I just want people to keep making Foundry quests and to not get discouraged. I need more quests to play, hehe

celticbass13

That is exactly the type of feedback I was looking for. Definitely appreciated!

A lot of the points were things I didn't think to look for when I was editing it the last time around, so I'll be going back in to fix them asap. Yeah, those racks were a bit annoying that I couldnt' remove them, thanks for the idea to add some other objects around them to help them at least make sense.

Actually I agree with Wildcaller's dialogue. I was planning to go back and do a rewrite to smooth that out, a friend had also pointed out that little bit. I'll probably also add the npc's to address the adds with the two fights.

I'll have to rotate the house a bit to fix the leaning. You're right, that is a little weird.

Is there a way to change the color of the blood spatter? It's been black every time I've play tested it and I wasn't able to find any way to change it.

Honestly, you don't need to worry me taking anything the wrong way, haha. If I can't take the criticism I shouldn't be doing it in the first place. It's the complete opposite actually, I'm already working on another idea for a second, hopefullly longer quest while also tweaking this one.

Still much appreciated feedback!

celticbass13

Just updated it. I think I managed to address most of it.

nokturnel

BTW For anyone using blood decals in their missions. Use blood projector instead. You have to aim it at the surface you want the blood to be and it's a lot trickier to place than the black blood decal, but since atm we can't fix the blood decal so it's not black, the blood projector works for making blood actually red.

celticbass13

nokturnel wrote: »

BTW For anyone using blood decals in their missions. Use blood projector instead. You have to aim it at the surface you want the blood to be and it's a lot trickier to place than the black blood decal, but since atm we can't fix the blood decal so it's not black, the blood projector works for making blood actually red.

Thank you! I've been trying to figure that one out for days. I'll have to check it out.