Review My Quest "A Basement Full of Bones" Please.

zoustyx

Code: NW-DNNSEN88D

Quest: A Basement Full of Bones
Author: zoustyx
In-game handle:@zoustyx
Quest type: Story Driven, Medium Combat Difficulty.
Party size: Solo, companion ok but it makes it less fun.
Duration: ~20 Minutes

Premise: A flyer has been sent out about a problem in the contractor's basement. What could be happening?

Note: This is the first quest in a series. Also please leave comments about bugs, exploits, and more importantly spelling errors. Thanks!

zoustyx

*bump* Not one review or comment yet.

alcsaar0

Its near impossible to find quests in the review list. I wouldn't hold my breath. We can't even subscribe to you with out finding the quest first.

zoustyx

That's what the code is for, you don't need to put the quest name in.

visigoth18

I've been trying to Search for your quest and the search never returns any results?...whats up with that

HA! I found it! if you try to use the search field under the "NEW" Tab its totally buged, use the Search field under the "BEST" Tab!

Review/ Suggestions:
- the first map transition doesn't have an interact description, it only says [press (interact key) to go to next map] "something would be better"

- walking in a door and appearing in a sewer/ crypt was surprising. but I'm guessing it's supposed to be the basement "not bad". That guy has the craziest basement I have ever seen

- first conversation "The first thing you will need to do to rid of them" I think you meant "to get rid of them"? and the response is just "continue" which go's straight to asking me if I got rid of them yet? I haven't even finished talking to him :]

- Second conversation "I see the undead have stop rising already." it should be "stopped"
and "Did you think those corpse you fought came from no where?" is kinda awkward, maybe try "where did you think the corpses you fought came from?"
and "here's the key to the gate that sealed shut a horde of undead." might work better more like "Here's the key to a gate I sealed shut, trapping a horde of undead"

- the keys description is the same, the phrasing is awkward.

- the door you used has the same name as the item in the foundry "Dungeon Portcullis Large Closed" try naming it in the foundry.

- the undead lich was all messed up. his patrol path gets caught on a bunch of stuff, and he wouldn't stop so I could talk to him. when he did finally get stuck completely and I could talk to him, I picked the response where I had to fight him. but he disappeared...so I had to go all the way back to where you spawned the encounter which was quite a ways "through the tunnel with the traps". it needs work

- you need to name the table. Its showing as "Table - simple 01"

- in the research notes description "The" instead of "These"

- The "Heinous Alter" needs an interact description...like "smash the alter to pieces" anything would work better then [press (interact key) to interact]

- try "for the last time" or "one last time" instead of "a final time" or even "for the final time". but that's just me being picky "final" isn't usually used in this kind of phrasing think of "Final" more as a boundary, not so much as an interaction that you do with someone. Like "his Final act" it's implying that hes going to die and death is the boundary being imposed on his action/ actions...

- quest text like "Exit the area" lacks immersion... same for map transitions like "Go to next map"... it kills immersion

- NPC dialogue...you have "uou" I'm sure its supposed to be "you"

- and at the end I still didn't pick up on the ("potions" trade) bit? what were you implying...

OK well that's my review:
Combat was fun "a little challenging" but I liked it. The map was cool, story was neat. Needs some polishing and a little work, but I bet it will be fun when it's done :]

zoustyx

Thanks for the response! I made quite a few changes with the suggestions you guys/gals made. I have also completed a beta version of the second quest in the series and would like some help finding the bugs/exploits/spelling/ect errors.

Code: NW-DF9CHASFN

Quest:The Halls of the Everdead
Author: zoustyx
In-game handle:@zoustyx
Quest type: Story Driven, Medium Combat Difficulty.
Party size: I Recommend 2 players but it can be done solo but may be difficult due to the boss fight at end.
Duration: ~20 Minutes

Premise: The contractor has contacted you yet again, saying that he has something interesting to show you. What could he possibly surprise you with this time?

zoustyx

*TERRR bump*