"Hi, it's us, the Deferi again! We absolutely love balance. With that in mind, would you please do us a favor and kill every Breen until they are extinct? IT'S FOR BALANCE, YOU KNOW! STOP ASKING SO MANY QUESTIONS AND MURDER THE BREEN!!!!"
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You misunderstand the Deferi...
"Balance" means getting everyone else to do your dirty work, while staying a pacifist... Basically, they are in PERFECT balance.
Edit: spelling
If i had to destroy one of them i know which ones i would send back to the void.
Why is there so much garbage around this planet? Don't they ever sweep up here?
l don't know.
l really don't know what l'm about to say, except l have a feeling about it.
That l must repeat the words that come without my knowledge.'
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The Deferi need to either a.) get over themselves and at least build defensive weaponry or b.) apply for Federation membership so that they are under Starfleet's protection. I'm sure there's some way they can consider themselves still in balance while being under the umbrella of a larger power. Such as, "They defend us, and in return we teach them the ways of The Force Balance."
I don't follow
Living "balance" like it's suggested is like playing a absolutely neutral RPG character. If you think it means to be passive and not doing anything you're doing it wrong, preserving "balance" is actually a lot of work and requires some things like openly turning against your allies for the sole reason of considering the alliance's current course of action tipping that balance. The notion that the Deferi would be absolutely helpless while being attacked makes no sense whatsoever. I absolutely buy the unpreparedness for war, as they were so uninteresting no power was interested in them before. But with the help of the alliance they'd up their game and needed to field defensive forces. Their philosophy would forbid them from ever entering an opposing force's territory to vanquish them, but they would certainly fight to defend their own and save their people.
What's even more interesting is if the Deferi would have become for STO what the Romulans ultimatly became. A subfaction joining both sides and even joining both parties to fight each other in a war. The Deferi would enter what's essentially civil war simply because they'd need to keep the balance. There would be no ill will between Deferi, but their ships facing each other in battle would simply exchange formal greeting and regret that in order to keep the balance they now have to fight each other. It would have been a interesting plot in my opinion.
Having the galactic union of STO however makes things a lot easier of course. In my headcanon the Deferi with help of the alliance, started to built their own defensive service to relieve allies from their patrol duties and join efforts to preserve the balance by preventing invasions, assimilation and the like. I even started to write together some fluff but due to other things going on I put it on ice for the time being http://imgur.com/a/XoHPN
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Their concept of balance... Meh. I don't expect it to stand up under scrutiny.
Indeed. I've found that the amount of self-control - on both the personal and the civilisation level - and the amount of self-reflection and self restraint rivals that of some of the cultures that are best known for these things, possibly even up to the level of the Vulcans.
They could easily be considered one of the most responsible cultures we know of.