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Foundry Reviews -- anyone want to be my test subject?

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  • logitech007logitech007 Member Posts: 148 Arc User
    edited August 2013
    Hello, ashtaku, I have 2 missions that I would liked to be reviewed, I will list the information below for you.

    Name: The Fvain Group part 1. (This story picks up with last part 3 ends, you don't have to play that part to understand but its up too you) Also this mission takes place in flashbacks.
    ID: ST-HUUBIG8KJ
    Author name: Logitech007
    Language: English
    Side: Federation
    Level: 31+
    Starting location: Wall console just outside of the transporter room on ESD
    Story: From the Borg---Jem' Hadar battle crisis came a group of officers who are plotting the downfall of the Federation by any and all means. They have triggered some sort of splinter group. Enemies are now allies and allies are now enemies. Can you put a stop to this before this group successful. If they are, what will be the balance of power be like in the area? Where did this group come from and who leads this group? How big is this group? The answer may or may not surprise you.

    Name: The Fvain Group part 2 (You will need a shuttle for a part of this mission but it will tell you when).
    ID: ST-HFIPWJ7A5
    Author name: Logitech007
    Language: English
    Side: Federation
    Level: 31+
    Starting location: Wall console just outside of the transporter room on ESD
    Story: Now we know who in Starfleet's Echelon is part of the Fvain Group, but does it going further up the chain then some of its command officers. Are there more misguided officers who are plotting? Who will we enter into a temporary alliance with, The Romulans or the Klingons, to put an end to this and will this new alliance push the Federation across the line that they can not undo or will the ends justify the means to whatever the length Starfleet will go to end this threat once and for all? Another player is revealed.

    Thank you so much for playing and reviewing my 2 new missions I am working on part 3 now.

    If you have issues or trouble please feel free to ingame me at @Logitech007

    Thanks.
    Logitech007
    Logitech007
  • ashtakuashtaku Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited August 2013
    No problem, I have added them to the queue.
    Hello, ashtaku, I have 2 missions that I would liked to be reviewed, I will list the information below for you.

    Name: The Fvain Group part 1. (This story picks up with last part 3 ends, you don't have to play that part to understand but its up too you) Also this mission takes place in flashbacks.
    ID: ST-HUUBIG8KJ
    Author name: Logitech007
    Language: English
    Side: Federation
    Level: 31+
    Starting location: Wall console just outside of the transporter room on ESD
    Story: From the Borg---Jem' Hadar battle crisis came a group of officers who are plotting the downfall of the Federation by any and all means. They have triggered some sort of splinter group. Enemies are now allies and allies are now enemies. Can you put a stop to this before this group successful. If they are, what will be the balance of power be like in the area? Where did this group come from and who leads this group? How big is this group? The answer may or may not surprise you.

    Name: The Fvain Group part 2 (You will need a shuttle for a part of this mission but it will tell you when).
    ID: ST-HFIPWJ7A5
    Author name: Logitech007
    Language: English
    Side: Federation
    Level: 31+
    Starting location: Wall console just outside of the transporter room on ESD
    Story: Now we know who in Starfleet's Echelon is part of the Fvain Group, but does it going further up the chain then some of its command officers. Are there more misguided officers who are plotting? Who will we enter into a temporary alliance with, The Romulans or the Klingons, to put an end to this and will this new alliance push the Federation across the line that they can not undo or will the ends justify the means to whatever the length Starfleet will go to end this threat once and for all? Another player is revealed.

    Thank you so much for playing and reviewing my 2 new missions I am working on part 3 now.

    If you have issues or trouble please feel free to ingame me at @Logitech007

    Thanks.
    Logitech007
  • ashtakuashtaku Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited August 2013
    nrobbiec wrote: »
    You could do mine, Traitor's Tales if you have the time :)

    Nrobbiec:

    I just finished my review of Traitor's Tales. You've got the beginnings of a really good episode there -- I hope you continue to refine and enhance this one as it's got a lot of potential :)
  • logitech007logitech007 Member Posts: 148 Arc User
    edited August 2013
    Hello, ashtaku, thanks you for putting me on your list.

    There are 2 parts to the mission just in case I did not mentioned it. Also, part 1 starts where part 3 of my last series ended I tried to do do a short briefing in the start of part one of my new series.
    Logitech007
  • nrobbiecnrobbiec Member Posts: 959 Arc User
    edited August 2013
    Thanks for the review, Ashtaku.

    The carrier is Caitian so since I wanted to use Ferasans it seemed a logical fit, I added markings to the hull to distinguish but that's easy to miss. This is the KDF version of the Atrox.

    Looks like I need to put a note on the mission blurb that it's only for single players to avoid anyone else getting stuck in a wall.

    Unfortunately with the Crash Site map I'm stuck with Foundry limitations because all four holograms are technically one NPC group I can't add separate combat objectives and also I had the three identical locate objectives because the interact object just creates one large waypoint which would've left the player wandering the entire map - which wasn't well received in the original.

    The Facility 4028 map does not like NPCs, I'd have to put them in the middle of the corridor otherwise they'd up off the map so I decided against it and just left the prisoners instead.

    I've gone over the dialogue a few times, do you remember where the errors were?

    I tried not to deviate from STO canon too much, this is meant to be the start of a Fed version trilogy but the main events will remain untouched.

    I'll look into the placeholder dialogue problem tomorrow - it's 4am now.

    There are a few Easter eggs in it, I didn't think about immersion to be honest I was just having fun :)
  • ashtakuashtaku Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited August 2013
    nrobbiec:

    I dig what you are saying and I want to emphasize that I wasn't trying to shoot down your mission. I think you've got something good going here, but I think to be fully successful you might want to flesh out the story a bit. For example, you have a named Ferasan NPC in the ship's canteen - maybe you could add a default prompt to him and make one of the dialogue options "what are you doing on a Federation ship?!" after which he explains how its a Ferasan ship and they use the same design or something like that.

    The missing verb was in the pop-up after you kill the Ferasan captain. Your bridge officer says something to the effect of "Captain, the warp core is about to critical;" I think you meant for him to say "Captain, the warp core is about to go critical."

    Keep up the good work :)
    nrobbiec wrote: »
    Thanks for the review, Ashtaku.

    The carrier is Caitian so since I wanted to use Ferasans it seemed a logical fit, I added markings to the hull to distinguish but that's easy to miss. This is the KDF version of the Atrox.

    Looks like I need to put a note on the mission blurb that it's only for single players to avoid anyone else getting stuck in a wall.

    Unfortunately with the Crash Site map I'm stuck with Foundry limitations because all four holograms are technically one NPC group I can't add separate combat objectives and also I had the three identical locate objectives because the interact object just creates one large waypoint which would've left the player wandering the entire map - which wasn't well received in the original.

    The Facility 4028 map does not like NPCs, I'd have to put them in the middle of the corridor otherwise they'd up off the map so I decided against it and just left the prisoners instead.

    I've gone over the dialogue a few times, do you remember where the errors were?

    I tried not to deviate from STO canon too much, this is meant to be the start of a Fed version trilogy but the main events will remain untouched.

    I'll look into the placeholder dialogue problem tomorrow - it's 4am now.

    There are a few Easter eggs in it, I didn't think about immersion to be honest I was just having fun :)
  • nrobbiecnrobbiec Member Posts: 959 Arc User
    edited August 2013
    ashtaku wrote: »
    nrobbiec:

    I dig what you are saying and I want to emphasize that I wasn't trying to shoot down your mission. I think you've got something good going here, but I think to be fully successful you might want to flesh out the story a bit. For example, you have a named Ferasan NPC in the ship's canteen - maybe you could add a default prompt to him and make one of the dialogue options "what are you doing on a Federation ship?!" after which he explains how its a Ferasan ship and they use the same design or something like that.

    The missing verb was in the pop-up after you kill the Ferasan captain. Your bridge officer says something to the effect of "Captain, the warp core is about to critical;" I think you meant for him to say "Captain, the warp core is about to go critical."

    Keep up the good work :)

    No, no. Your review was very constructive :)

    That makes sense.

    Cheers, there's always one little thing that gets away from you :)
  • ashtakuashtaku Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited August 2013
    djf021 wrote: »
    I could always use another review... :)

    It's called "Desperate Prey"
    Author: djf021
    Fed side, takes approximately 30-45 minutes depending on choices.
    Thanks!

    DJF:

    I just posted my review of 'Desperate Prey' -- I had a lot of fun playing that one, thanks for volunteering it!
  • amahoodamahood Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited August 2013
    feel free to try my new Romulan-Fed episode, info is here:

    http://sto-forum.perfectworld.com/showthread.php?t=823891
  • ashtakuashtaku Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited August 2013
    amahood wrote: »
    feel free to try my new Romulan-Fed episode, info is here:

    http://sto-forum.perfectworld.com/showthread.php?t=823891

    Added it to my list -- will check it out :)
  • djf021djf021 Member Posts: 1,382 Arc User
    edited August 2013
    ashtaku wrote: »
    DJF:

    I just posted my review of 'Desperate Prey' -- I had a lot of fun playing that one, thanks for volunteering it!

    Thanks for the review! I enjoyed reading your comments, and I'm glad you liked the mission. You bring up a good point about the ending space battle, I've been considering putting a disabling effect on the map or some other way to make it a little more challenging.

    Anyway, thanks again, and I'll let you know when I'm ready for my next mission to be reviewed!
    C4117709-1498929112732780large.jpg

    Don't let them promote you. Don't let them transfer you. Don't let them do anything that takes you off the bridge of that ship, because while you're there... you can make a difference.
    -Captain James T. Kirk
  • logitech007logitech007 Member Posts: 148 Arc User
    edited August 2013
    Hello, ashtaku, I have my part three that I just finished that I would liked to be reviewed, I will list the information below for you. You have the other 2 parts on your list, so why don't you review part 3 last part.

    Name: The Fvain Group part 3.
    ID: ST-HIOTD6JKC
    Author name: Logitech007
    Language: English
    Side: Federation
    Level: 31+
    Starting location: Wall console just outside of the transporter room on ESD
    Story: In this conclusion of the story, Starfleet and the Klingon Empire has made strides to end this threat to both of them and to the entire quadrant. The true person(s) behind all of this is reveled. Are the players just pawns in the great game? Will the Federation and the Klingon Empire be able to cut the head off of this threat or will they fail? We are now finally able to know how and why each member joined the Fvain group.

    Thank you for reviewing parts 1 2 and three. Thanks. I look forward to your reviews.

    Thanks
    Logitech007
    Logitech007
  • plaustrum9144plaustrum9144 Member Posts: 5 Arc User
    Probably is too late, but mine is called The Jefferson Secession, if you're interested.
  • antman9173antman9173 Member Posts: 41 Arc User
    I'd like to throw my Q-aholic series into the ring if possible @antman9173 5 mission series.
  • duncanidaho11duncanidaho11 Member Posts: 7,980 Arc User
    edited February 2016
    Psst, guys, the last time this thread was used was 2013. Evil70th has a request-a-review/feedback thread over in the mission section if you need help with a particular mission.

    http://www.arcgames.com/en/forums/startrekonline/#/discussion/1072823/in-depth-mission-reports-upon-request

    Also, RogueEnterprise has kept up with his review-trade thread as late as Oct. 2015. I'm not sure if he's still running that but if you're keen on getting more reviews then his is another place to look into.

    http://www.arcgames.com/en/forums/startrekonline/#/discussion/1144821/the-trade-reviews-with-re-thread/p1

    And lastly, you can reach out to the Foundry Roundtable for on-air mission feedback.

    http://www.arcgames.com/en/forums/startrekonline/#/discussion/1211592/podcast-the-foundry-roundtable-episode-123-thirdiversary-ft-zeronius-rex
    Bipedal mammal and senior Foundry author.
    Notable missions: Apex [AEI], Gemini [SSF], Trident [AEI], Evolution's Smile [SSF], Transcendence
    Looking for something new to play? I've started building Foundry missions again in visual novel form!
  • antman9173antman9173 Member Posts: 41 Arc User
    lol wow wasnt even paying attention saw the last post and was like ok ill post too lol
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