At one point it was going to be the "Dagger of Rixx", with the Sacred Chalice of Rixx being used to cleanse oneself after a psionic assassination. Another was that the Holy Rings of Betazed were inscribed with the key to unlocking the ability of psionic assassination, and Lwaxana did so after Mr. Homn was killed.
But then I'd probably contradict something canon, so I left it at a legend where I could always claim that's the version Loranna heard as a child.
At least now I've got ammo for a future LC....maybe a trilogy..."Raiders of the Lost Dagger", "Rene Picard and the Temple of Rixx", and "Tasha Riker-Troi and the Psionic Crusade." :P
Love the concepts :cool: I've wanted to do something showing the more esoteric abilities of Betazoids for some time, and nearly wrote it here, but... didn't... When it came to write, this interaction came up instead, but the concepts you've mentioned, would definitely be the missing pieces to the puzzle I've been getting glimpses of :cool:
You know, there's one part of this intro that bugged me, and I've realised what it is. The part that says free Vorta and Jem'Hadar now seek membership in Starfleet. They all have unquestionable faith that the Founders are Gods. Real, hardcore, zealot level of belief, where they would strike you just for suggesting they are not. They already are free, they are not the Gou'aould.
Anyhoo, it's a slow day, so I should hopefully get to read through these today.
@ryan218: Loved it! Personal introspection mixed with a murder investigation. It really did feel like an episode of TNG, and when reading Alpha, I admit, I heard him with Data's voice and mannerisms. The only improvement I could think is maybe writing the investigation that leads them to Eldra. Or the questioning. Though I understand why you used the log for this part, which is a nice, effective way of moving time on.
@mosapow: Oh oh oh, the plot thickens! I was getting well into that story, didn't want it to end. Could we be looking at yet another ghost ship? I believe so. What class of ship is the Honolulu? The remark about the secondary deflector has thrown me. Don't expect the Viper to go looking for that one though.
*******************************************
A Romulan Strike Team, Missing Farmers and an ancient base on a Klingon Border world. But what connects them? Find out in my First Foundary mission: 'The Jeroan Farmer Escapade'
At least now I've got ammo for a future LC....maybe a trilogy..."Raiders of the Lost Dagger", "Rene Picard and the Temple of Rixx", and "Tasha Riker-Troi and the Psionic Crusade." :P
You know, there's one part of this intro that bugged me, and I've realised what it is. The part that says free Vorta and Jem'Hadar now seek membership in Starfleet. They all have unquestionable faith that the Founders are Gods. Real, hardcore, zealot level of belief, where they would strike you just for suggesting they are not. They already are free, they are not the Gou'aould.
Except when they don't. The clones aren't perfect, after all, and are constantly getting tampered with. It's always possible for one to not take the indoctrination quite as fervently or for them to reject their indoctrination later on. Even if the indoctrination is 99.99% successful, that still means that a hundred out of every million have the potential to break away. The Federation is a place where said beings can go and, presumably, still gain access to Ketracel White or whatever it is they need to stay alive.
Love the concepts :cool: I've wanted to do something showing the more esoteric abilities of Betazoids for some time, and nearly wrote it here, but... didn't... When it came to write, this interaction came up instead, but the concepts you've mentioned, would definitely be the missing pieces to the puzzle I've been getting glimpses of :cool:
Except when they don't. The clones aren't perfect, after all, and are constantly getting tampered with. It's always possible for one to not take the indoctrination quite as fervently or for them to reject their indoctrination later on. Even if the indoctrination is 99.99% successful, that still means that a hundred out of every million have the potential to break away. The Federation is a place where said beings can go and, presumably, still gain access to Ketracel White or whatever it is they need to stay alive.
Or 10 out of 100,000 or 1 in 10,000 ... that's a very small number, at best.
Although I think grylak makes a very good point, I also think squatsauce's counter-point allows for the LC to be probable.
Everyone who's submitted an entry proves it's probable, since none of these Dominion getting killed have actually been listed as a Starfleet officer. But as the DS9 fanboy I am, I had to point it out as it was irking me.
And technically, the Vorta were never genetically engineered to believe the Founders were Gods, that was only the Jem'Hadar, who I believe would be executed for blasphomy by the other Jem'Hadar if any of the others found out they didn't believe (my opinion, not fact on that one).
The Vorta believe because they were simple swamp dwellers, who took in an injured Changling and nursed it back to health and kept it hidden from the solids hunting it. The Changling promised to return the favour, and thus the genetic alterations to the Vorta into what we know them to be today happened. I think the Vorta genuinely believe as a matter of faith, not genetic manipulation.
*******************************************
A Romulan Strike Team, Missing Farmers and an ancient base on a Klingon Border world. But what connects them? Find out in my First Foundary mission: 'The Jeroan Farmer Escapade'
Also, the Jem'Hadar have blasphemed against the Founders more than once, both on DS9 and in-game. They serve the Founders, but they only "worship" them insofar as any hint of disloyalty is punished by removing the ketracel supply. (The White was what they were genetically engineered with; the Vorta were the ones engineered to worship the Founders, but the Founders seemed to fear that this would have robbed the Jem'Hadar of the initiative a good soldier needs.)
On the other tentacle, I'm taking a slightly different tack, assuming this story ever gets bloody finished.
A Romulan Strike Team, Missing Farmers and an ancient base on a Klingon Border world. But what connects them? Find out in my First Foundary mission: 'The Jeroan Farmer Escapade'
@marcusdkane - SKIPPED because I know you will be revising it. You owe me some paper!
@grylak - the plasma torch thing was gruesome and out of left field which made the situation truly heinous and all of it boiled down to the last paragraph ... nice.
@aten66 - SKIPPED because you said there would be updates. You owe me paper too!
Or 10 out of 100,000 or 1 in 10,000 ... that's a very small number, at best.
Although I think grylak makes a very good point, I also think squatsauce's counter-point allows for the LC to be probable.
Another thing to consider is that, in STO, you can have Jem'Hadar as Boffs, and both races as Doffs. My understanding is that it's not necessarily Captains being assassinated. It's Jem'Hadar and Vorta that are Federation citizens. Thus it could be written to be the crew of a ship that are being targeted.
That and well.... STO has the kinder gentler Dominion that was created by Odo returning to the Great Link.
You know, there's one part of this intro that bugged me, and I've realised what it is. The part that says free Vorta and Jem'Hadar now seek membership in Starfleet. They all have unquestionable faith that the Founders are Gods. Real, hardcore, zealot level of belief, where they would strike you just for suggesting they are not.
Doesn't necessarily preclude them from going in to Starfleet... does suggest that any of them trying it must have an ulterior motive, with a real or perceived benefit to the Founders at the core of it. Somehow, in their own heads at least, they are serving the Founders' cause by working for or with Starfleet.
@ masopw: Nice, well-written piece. A little dark, I guess, but I've written dark stuff before so I can't complain.
Some confusion on what happened to the Ferengi after his interrogation (and how they captured him? Beautiful); are you going to be adding more about that?
@ aten66: Nice story. Tight and well-written.
@ grylak: Good one! The format is a little difficult for me, but the plot is excellent. Very nice.
@ marcusdkane: Solid writing as usual. You really like the borderline stuff, don't you?
Anyway, I'm going to give a longer story a shot outside of the LCs. I'll see if I can start it in a week or two.
I owe you paper? Well, I might add some more, but I believe with this update it's okay, if you truly want though, I can add more.
I print out the entries to read away from the PC - the style of the forums (old and new) are not friendly to me, especially with longer entries. So, when someone states they plan to add, or have amended, their entry then I either ignore the update or print it out again. Understanding this is my choice to deal with my situation, I was just kidding about the paper debt.
So, if you want to add more then that's up to you.
@destroyer831642 - That may as well be a script for a full episode. Although I wonder if some functionary in Starfleet would see that Betazoids are slowly being rotated onto the crew of a single Starship ...
@destroyer831642 - That may as well be a script for a full episode. Although I wonder if some functionary in Starfleet would see that Betazoids are slowly being rotated onto the crew of a single Starship ...
It doesn't seem out of line with Starfleet regulations. After all, the Enterprise NCC-1701 was pretty thoroughly dominated by Human crew members, and the Intrepid NCC-1631 was crewed exclusively by Vulcans...
Fair enough. Although I would think Human dominance on a Starfleet vessel is expected, from a certain point of view. For a TV show, this makes perfect sense.
Fair enough. Although I would think Human dominance on a Starfleet vessel is expected, from a certain point of view. For a TV show, this makes perfect sense.
yeah, but even for a TV perspective, Betazoid makeup is easy. :P
@ masopw: Nice, well-written piece. A little dark, I guess, but I've written dark stuff before so I can't complain.
Some confusion on what happened to the Ferengi after his interrogation (and how they captured him? Beautiful); are you going to be adding more about that?
Thank you!
I tried to imply that the Ferengi got himself released after giving up the location of the 'ghost ship' in the Badlands (the dialog of him telling Sotek he couldn't hold him for a long time, nor get to the Badlands and back without causing a diplomatic incident, Sotek threatening him with "Beware the Vulcan Greed for Knowledge", and the subsequent arrival of the Honolulu in the Badlands.)
For a 'behind the scenes' bit, Sment was paid off by a S31 operative to tell the media that he came across the 'wrecked' Bonaventure. He was paid quite well...and, as a resourceful Ferengi, did his best to get more information than he was paid for. S31's handler let slip the bit about a random 'ghost ship' as bait; Sment took the bait and made inquiries where he shouldn't have...that's how he learned about the Spitfire. S31 realized he was a bit too nosey and would squeal if pressed about the Bonaventure, so he met with an 'accident' after being released from the Honolulu.
Love the concepts :cool: I've wanted to do something showing the more esoteric abilities of Betazoids for some time, and nearly wrote it here, but... didn't... When it came to write, this interaction came up instead, but the concepts you've mentioned, would definitely be the missing pieces to the puzzle I've been getting glimpses of :cool:
If you want them, they're all yours! I'll even throw in the code to decrypt the Rings of Betazed...
Hint: It's on the third one...but it only becomes clear after the 83rd ringing of the gong during the Feast of the Dark Night. If you don't figure it out by the 102nd, then you're gonna have to wait for the next Feast...which comes every...um...every...how many years?
@mosapow: Oh oh oh, the plot thickens! I was getting well into that story, didn't want it to end. Could we be looking at yet another ghost ship? I believe so. What class of ship is the Honolulu? The remark about the secondary deflector has thrown me. Don't expect the Viper to go looking for that one though.
Thanks!
All answers shall be made clear in the thrilling conclusion!
The Honolulu's a Vesta-class ship, with Aventine nacelles. The combination apparently means a hectic maintenance schedule that isn't always a success.
The Viper has done a great thing helping out...the probe they launched will serve it's part!
(Oh...if another ship would be so kind as to drop an astrometrics buoy near the Badlands, it would be ever so helpful...)
If you want them, they're all yours! I'll even throw in the code to decrypt the Rings of Betazed...
Hint: It's on the third one...but it only becomes clear after the 83rd ringing of the gong during the Feast of the Dark Night. If you don't figure it out by the 102nd, then you're gonna have to wait for the next Feast...which comes every...um...every...how many years?
Thanks, the great LC59 ReWrite can begin. In Earnest!
@destroyer831642 - That may as well be a script for a full episode.
Yeah, I have a habit of going a bit overboard when I have a big idea. I was also trying to keep it as canonical as possible, so I looked up the book "The Battle of Betazed" to find out how in the world the Betazoids won the battle in the first place. Also, I was tempted to add a line saying to the degree of "Sink the Bismarck" echoing the WWII Naval battlecry saying the same thing. (I swear to get that name, I just logged onto the game and found the first Odyssey-class vessel with a reasonable name)
Comments
I'll try and clear up any questions you guys have, next I'm on.
Love the concepts :cool: I've wanted to do something showing the more esoteric abilities of Betazoids for some time, and nearly wrote it here, but... didn't... When it came to write, this interaction came up instead, but the concepts you've mentioned, would definitely be the missing pieces to the puzzle I've been getting glimpses of :cool:
Anyhoo, it's a slow day, so I should hopefully get to read through these today.
@ryan218: Loved it! Personal introspection mixed with a murder investigation. It really did feel like an episode of TNG, and when reading Alpha, I admit, I heard him with Data's voice and mannerisms. The only improvement I could think is maybe writing the investigation that leads them to Eldra. Or the questioning. Though I understand why you used the log for this part, which is a nice, effective way of moving time on.
@mosapow: Oh oh oh, the plot thickens! I was getting well into that story, didn't want it to end. Could we be looking at yet another ghost ship? I believe so. What class of ship is the Honolulu? The remark about the secondary deflector has thrown me. Don't expect the Viper to go looking for that one though.
A Romulan Strike Team, Missing Farmers and an ancient base on a Klingon Border world. But what connects them? Find out in my First Foundary mission: 'The Jeroan Farmer Escapade'
Dooo eeet!!
Except when they don't.
Although I think grylak makes a very good point, I also think squatsauce's counter-point allows for the LC to be probable.
Everyone who's submitted an entry proves it's probable, since none of these Dominion getting killed have actually been listed as a Starfleet officer. But as the DS9 fanboy I am, I had to point it out as it was irking me.
And technically, the Vorta were never genetically engineered to believe the Founders were Gods, that was only the Jem'Hadar, who I believe would be executed for blasphomy by the other Jem'Hadar if any of the others found out they didn't believe (my opinion, not fact on that one).
The Vorta believe because they were simple swamp dwellers, who took in an injured Changling and nursed it back to health and kept it hidden from the solids hunting it. The Changling promised to return the favour, and thus the genetic alterations to the Vorta into what we know them to be today happened. I think the Vorta genuinely believe as a matter of faith, not genetic manipulation.
A Romulan Strike Team, Missing Farmers and an ancient base on a Klingon Border world. But what connects them? Find out in my First Foundary mission: 'The Jeroan Farmer Escapade'
Weyoun 6 in the DS9 episode "Treachery, Faith, and the Great River" explicitly states otherwise.
On the other tentacle, I'm taking a slightly different tack, assuming this story ever gets bloody finished.
Like I needed an excuse. Heh.
A Romulan Strike Team, Missing Farmers and an ancient base on a Klingon Border world. But what connects them? Find out in my First Foundary mission: 'The Jeroan Farmer Escapade'
Thanks!
@grylak - the plasma torch thing was gruesome and out of left field which made the situation truly heinous and all of it boiled down to the last paragraph ... nice.
@aten66 - SKIPPED because you said there would be updates. You owe me paper too!
That and well.... STO has the kinder gentler Dominion that was created by Odo returning to the Great Link.
My character Tsin'xing
I owe you paper? Well, I might add some more, but I believe with this update it's okay, if you truly want though, I can add more.
Doesn't necessarily preclude them from going in to Starfleet... does suggest that any of them trying it must have an ulterior motive, with a real or perceived benefit to the Founders at the core of it. Somehow, in their own heads at least, they are serving the Founders' cause by working for or with Starfleet.
Just thought I'd throw that out there.
Some confusion on what happened to the Ferengi after his interrogation (and how they captured him? Beautiful); are you going to be adding more about that?
@ aten66: Nice story. Tight and well-written.
@ grylak: Good one! The format is a little difficult for me, but the plot is excellent. Very nice.
@ marcusdkane: Solid writing as usual. You really like the borderline stuff, don't you?
Anyway, I'm going to give a longer story a shot outside of the LCs. I'll see if I can start it in a week or two.
I print out the entries to read away from the PC - the style of the forums (old and new) are not friendly to me, especially with longer entries. So, when someone states they plan to add, or have amended, their entry then I either ignore the update or print it out again. Understanding this is my choice to deal with my situation, I was just kidding about the paper debt.
So, if you want to add more then that's up to you.
Yes! This!
Very good analogy.
My character Tsin'xing
Thank you!
I tried to imply that the Ferengi got himself released after giving up the location of the 'ghost ship' in the Badlands (the dialog of him telling Sotek he couldn't hold him for a long time, nor get to the Badlands and back without causing a diplomatic incident, Sotek threatening him with "Beware the Vulcan Greed for Knowledge", and the subsequent arrival of the Honolulu in the Badlands.)
For a 'behind the scenes' bit, Sment was paid off by a S31 operative to tell the media that he came across the 'wrecked' Bonaventure. He was paid quite well...and, as a resourceful Ferengi, did his best to get more information than he was paid for. S31's handler let slip the bit about a random 'ghost ship' as bait; Sment took the bait and made inquiries where he shouldn't have...that's how he learned about the Spitfire. S31 realized he was a bit too nosey and would squeal if pressed about the Bonaventure, so he met with an 'accident' after being released from the Honolulu.
If you want them, they're all yours! I'll even throw in the code to decrypt the Rings of Betazed...
Hint: It's on the third one...but it only becomes clear after the 83rd ringing of the gong during the Feast of the Dark Night. If you don't figure it out by the 102nd, then you're gonna have to wait for the next Feast...which comes every...um...every...how many years?
Thanks!
All answers shall be made clear in the thrilling
The Honolulu's a Vesta-class ship, with Aventine nacelles. The combination apparently means a hectic maintenance schedule that isn't always a success.
The Viper has done a great thing helping out...the probe they launched will serve it's part!
(Oh...if another ship would be so kind as to drop an astrometrics buoy near the Badlands, it would be ever so helpful...)
You won't be saying that if it doesn't end with the trilogy, but with a fourth story..."Chakotay and the Kingdom of the Crystal Horta"! :P
Thanks, the great LC59 ReWrite can begin. In Earnest!
Yeah, I have a habit of going a bit overboard when I have a big idea. I was also trying to keep it as canonical as possible, so I looked up the book "The Battle of Betazed" to find out how in the world the Betazoids won the battle in the first place. Also, I was tempted to add a line saying to the degree of "Sink the Bismarck" echoing the WWII Naval battlecry saying the same thing. (I swear to get that name, I just logged onto the game and found the first Odyssey-class vessel with a reasonable name)