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The Good, the Bad, and the Nandi
trueapocrypha
Member Posts: 11 Arc User
in Ten Forward
Jolan tru. I've been playing STO since the Samsar event now, and after this year's summer event and the Nandi were announced, I felt inspired to write a short story about how my Romulan would end up with one, as told by him. It was fun to write, I think it turned out decently, and there's a little bonus at the end. Hope no one minds me sharing. Oh, this story has nothing to do with cowboys, I just think the Nandi's butt-ugly. *grin*
Without further ado:
My ship? I think it's as ugly as you do. In fact, I feel a bit guilty sitting in that chair. I sometimes wonder how much all this finery could buy for my people.
Suffice it to say, there's quite a story behind it.
After a series of difficult missions, Admiral Kererek "asked" me to take my ship and crew to Risa, and personally evaluate the new warship class that'd been announced. I doubt he ever intended to actually purchase a luxury warship; he allotted me entirely too much time for this evaluation, and, smiling, "encouraged" me to make use of the extra with my crew. So, I did as I was ordered; I made the trip, availed myself of tours of the ship, pored over the promotional materials, saw the sights, and even constructed a sand fortress.
At the end of my assignment, there was a short promotional cruise on the new ship open to serious potential buyers, which is to say large organizations, where she would be put through her paces. Of course, I attended, padd in hand; it would be a poor evaluation that didn't observe the ship in action, and plenty of others had the same thought, including representatives of the Risian government. I took copious notes while we wandered the ship, and a crew from the manufacturer--including a few non-Ferengi--demonstrated many of its functions. In all, I found it to be a capable, if small ship, with plenty of firepower, and a surprising focus on science. Really, there was little to dislike about it, except the way it looked.. like a mutant swallow.
I didn't include that part in my report.
In any case, my notes were so copious, I didn't notice when my name was called upon landing, the setting sun bright upon the bridge vewscreen. A smiling Ferengi (always an unsettling sight) picked me out of the crowd, carefully pulled my padd down from beneath my working fingers, and asked for me by name--somehow, impressively, managing not to mangle it. Noticing people gathered around, I warily confirmed I was who she was asking for, and she continued.
"Now that I have your attention, as I was saying, there's a little unannounced bonus that comes along with this cruise. The Risian Council generously agreed to sponsor a drawing to commemorate her launch, and I've just been informed that your name has been drawn for the top prize: The very ship we're standing in, first of her class, complete with a short period of crew training and manufacturer support. Congratulations!" Cartoonish Romulan symbols and celebratory words appeared on all the viewscreens, while bubbly music--sounding far more impressive than it had any right to on a crowded warship bridge--played. She reached out to shake my hand, to applause from the crowd.
Taken aback, I took her hand and stammered my thanks. With the same smile, but speaking rapidly, she went on. "Of course, you'll be responsible for any applicable taxes and insurance, and Ferenginar Graving Yards, owned by Quark Enterprises, provides this ship on an as-is basis," she warned smoothly, as if she were making small talk while still shaking my hand. "But we'll work out the details tomorrow. For now, here's your new ship! Well, what do you think? What will you name her?" She looked expectantly at me, as did everyone else, all smiles.
Still a bit dazzled by it all, I blinked, and blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "Chironsala." Family names aren't so important anymore, it's true, but it was mine. Just then, I thought of the fact that officially, I was there as a representative of my government, so ownership would rightly fall to them, but the Ferengi was talking again, bluster continuing apace.
"The Chironsala," she repeated appreciatively, with a slow nod. "Fancy name for a fancy ship. Well come on, let's have a seat in your chair, shall we?" She led me to the plush captain's seat, and noticing my hesitance, practically pushed me into it, flanked by Risians and Ferengi crew. "There, now! How's it feel?" Looking up, I smiled gamely--ohh, the holographic stills of me in that chair, I still cringe to see that ridiculous look on my face--"Sorry, ahh, I'm a little bit caught off guard by all this. I thank you, and the Romulan people thank you."
"Of course, of course," the Ferengi chattered on excitedly, "but what do *you* think?"
My mind finally catching up to the situation, I leaned back in the chair and made myself comfortable, sinking in, looking around for a few moments. "...I think you'd all better get off my ship," I informed them deadpan, then smiled wryly, to laughter.
"Alright, alright," agreed the Ferengi, laughing as well, outstretching her arms as if to herd people out herself. "Well, you heard the man, let's all get our last questions out of the way before we turn her over to the winner, shall we? Of course, I can arrange for purchases or further demonstrations for any of you who are interested, you all have my contact information." I had to admit to myself, she was good, always looking for the sale.
Sensing an opportunity to make some connections, show a bit of goodwill on behalf of my people, and perhaps salvage my reputation after being caught dumbfounded besides, I spoke up, addressing all present. "Wait. On behalf of the Romulan Republic, I'd like to invite all of you, including your demonstration crew," I nodded towards the Ferengi, "to return tomorrow night for an informal christening ceremony in the ship's bar." It was well-appointed, as the Ferengi had shown us, so why not make use of it? I would need to unwind after dealing with the practicalities of accepting the ship and choosing a skeleton crew with which to bring her home, anyway. "I look forward to meeting you all."
"Well, how about that, folks, isn't he a saint?" The Ferengi seemed quite pleased by this turn of events, no doubt because she'd get another chance to schmooze with everyone. I walked and talked on the way to the transporter room, did some handshaking, graciously accepted congratulations from others, thanked the Risians, and stood by as the other potential buyers asked their questions and left, until it was just the Ferengi and I.
Much more casual than before, she turned to me and asked, "Well, that was exciting, wasn't it? Now, it's late, and as I said before, we'll take care of the details tomorrow. We'll transfer the command codes to you once the paperwork's done. Strictly speaking, The Risian government has already paid for the ship, so your agreement will be with them. Don't worry too much over that line about taxes and insurance. For now, anything else?"
I'd been thinking about it, and there were a few things I had to do. "Please draw up the paperwork for the Romulan Republic. I'm here under orders, and I can't accept this ship personally." The Ferengi nodded while I spoke. "Beyond that.. May I make a subspace transmission?"
The Ferengi gave an understanding smile and another nod. "Ahh, your Admiral will want to hear about this, hmm? Let's go back to the bridge." I walked with her. True to form, she continued her pitch, albeit in a low-key manner, pointing out small things as we went, obviously hoping we would purchase more. Arriving on the bridge, she ordered a crewman to open the channel, and I sat back in the captain's chair, the Ferengi taking the first officer's spot. By some stroke of cursed luck, Kererek was in his office and answered.
"Rake? Aren't you supposed to be enjoying the scenery?" he asked, blinking in surprise. Taking a breath and steeling myself, I explained.
Oh, how the Admiral laughed, my face flushing green with his amusement at my expense, while I wished for a personal cloaking device--or death. The Ferengi "helpfully" bantered with him, sending along images and recordings from the announcement, along with copies of some of the promotional material, and my notes, which the Admiral scanned. Eventually, he declared, "Well, that's quite a surprise, but a welcome one."
"Yes, sir," I agreed, still flushed. "Every ship makes a difference. My apologies about the acceptance and the name, the ship of course belongs to the Romulan people, but as you saw, I was a bit--"
"Oh, don't worry about that," interrupted the Admiral, literally waving me off, with as big a smile as I'd ever seen on his face. "Chironsala is a perfect name for your ship," he informed me, a twinkle in his eye.
"...My ship?" I felt a lump forming in my throat as I asked. Oh, no. Oh, no, no.. He wouldn't.
"Of course! You're a scientist, you said yourself it seems capable in that role, and it's certainly better equipped for combat than the Vadenius," he rightly observed. "As of right now, you are the person in the Romulan militia most familiar with her, and besides, you won her," he added, practically beaming with mirth, sealing my fate. "Who better to shake her down and take her to the front lines? Select your crew," he continued without a pause, "and let your First Officer know that the Vadenius is hers, if she wants her. You've both served with distinction. I'll notify Personnel and Materiel, and I await your arrival back here."
He would.
Admittedly, I felt a bit deflated. I was glad to have a new ship for the Republic, of course, but it was so ugly on the outside, and so ostentatious on the inside! And my name would be forever attached to it. I didn't dare undermine the Admiral by objecting in front of the Ferengi or her crew, though. In addition, they had just worked so hard to sell it, and had so graciously participated in awarding us one, it would've been rude to insult it. "Very well, sir. Thank you, for both of us."
"Fly her in good health. Kererek out." I'm not entirely sure, but I think I heard one more chuckle as he signed off. I took a breath, hoping my face would cool soon, and the Ferengi spoke first.
"Well then, that seems settled! Looks like she'll be yours after all. Don't worry, the Chironsala will serve you well, I guarantee it," the Ferengi assured me, smiling brightly once more.
"Enough to put it in writing?" I asked her grudgingly. She must have heard the defeat in my voice, and she expertly dodged the question. "Hey, cheer up.. This is a good day for you and the people of New Romulus, remember? New ship, new friends, new opportunities? Now all you have to do is seize them."
She may have been a slick saleswoman, but she was also right. I'd just have to get used to the Chironsala, she was going to be my new home. "Can we at least get better holographic records of me tomorrow, if you're going to plaster my face across your advertisements?"
The Ferengi laughed. "Of course."
Bonus: Why a Klingon would bother raising Risian birds
"Yesterday, a cheating human petaQ kicked my board during a race, and caused me to bounce off a rock trying to recover. Well, I once heard Captain Paris describe insulting another human by "giving him the bird." So I'm going to hatch this egg, find that petaQ, and give him the bird! Preferably by shoving it down his throat."
Without further ado:
My ship? I think it's as ugly as you do. In fact, I feel a bit guilty sitting in that chair. I sometimes wonder how much all this finery could buy for my people.
Suffice it to say, there's quite a story behind it.
After a series of difficult missions, Admiral Kererek "asked" me to take my ship and crew to Risa, and personally evaluate the new warship class that'd been announced. I doubt he ever intended to actually purchase a luxury warship; he allotted me entirely too much time for this evaluation, and, smiling, "encouraged" me to make use of the extra with my crew. So, I did as I was ordered; I made the trip, availed myself of tours of the ship, pored over the promotional materials, saw the sights, and even constructed a sand fortress.
At the end of my assignment, there was a short promotional cruise on the new ship open to serious potential buyers, which is to say large organizations, where she would be put through her paces. Of course, I attended, padd in hand; it would be a poor evaluation that didn't observe the ship in action, and plenty of others had the same thought, including representatives of the Risian government. I took copious notes while we wandered the ship, and a crew from the manufacturer--including a few non-Ferengi--demonstrated many of its functions. In all, I found it to be a capable, if small ship, with plenty of firepower, and a surprising focus on science. Really, there was little to dislike about it, except the way it looked.. like a mutant swallow.
I didn't include that part in my report.
In any case, my notes were so copious, I didn't notice when my name was called upon landing, the setting sun bright upon the bridge vewscreen. A smiling Ferengi (always an unsettling sight) picked me out of the crowd, carefully pulled my padd down from beneath my working fingers, and asked for me by name--somehow, impressively, managing not to mangle it. Noticing people gathered around, I warily confirmed I was who she was asking for, and she continued.
"Now that I have your attention, as I was saying, there's a little unannounced bonus that comes along with this cruise. The Risian Council generously agreed to sponsor a drawing to commemorate her launch, and I've just been informed that your name has been drawn for the top prize: The very ship we're standing in, first of her class, complete with a short period of crew training and manufacturer support. Congratulations!" Cartoonish Romulan symbols and celebratory words appeared on all the viewscreens, while bubbly music--sounding far more impressive than it had any right to on a crowded warship bridge--played. She reached out to shake my hand, to applause from the crowd.
Taken aback, I took her hand and stammered my thanks. With the same smile, but speaking rapidly, she went on. "Of course, you'll be responsible for any applicable taxes and insurance, and Ferenginar Graving Yards, owned by Quark Enterprises, provides this ship on an as-is basis," she warned smoothly, as if she were making small talk while still shaking my hand. "But we'll work out the details tomorrow. For now, here's your new ship! Well, what do you think? What will you name her?" She looked expectantly at me, as did everyone else, all smiles.
Still a bit dazzled by it all, I blinked, and blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "Chironsala." Family names aren't so important anymore, it's true, but it was mine. Just then, I thought of the fact that officially, I was there as a representative of my government, so ownership would rightly fall to them, but the Ferengi was talking again, bluster continuing apace.
"The Chironsala," she repeated appreciatively, with a slow nod. "Fancy name for a fancy ship. Well come on, let's have a seat in your chair, shall we?" She led me to the plush captain's seat, and noticing my hesitance, practically pushed me into it, flanked by Risians and Ferengi crew. "There, now! How's it feel?" Looking up, I smiled gamely--ohh, the holographic stills of me in that chair, I still cringe to see that ridiculous look on my face--"Sorry, ahh, I'm a little bit caught off guard by all this. I thank you, and the Romulan people thank you."
"Of course, of course," the Ferengi chattered on excitedly, "but what do *you* think?"
My mind finally catching up to the situation, I leaned back in the chair and made myself comfortable, sinking in, looking around for a few moments. "...I think you'd all better get off my ship," I informed them deadpan, then smiled wryly, to laughter.
"Alright, alright," agreed the Ferengi, laughing as well, outstretching her arms as if to herd people out herself. "Well, you heard the man, let's all get our last questions out of the way before we turn her over to the winner, shall we? Of course, I can arrange for purchases or further demonstrations for any of you who are interested, you all have my contact information." I had to admit to myself, she was good, always looking for the sale.
Sensing an opportunity to make some connections, show a bit of goodwill on behalf of my people, and perhaps salvage my reputation after being caught dumbfounded besides, I spoke up, addressing all present. "Wait. On behalf of the Romulan Republic, I'd like to invite all of you, including your demonstration crew," I nodded towards the Ferengi, "to return tomorrow night for an informal christening ceremony in the ship's bar." It was well-appointed, as the Ferengi had shown us, so why not make use of it? I would need to unwind after dealing with the practicalities of accepting the ship and choosing a skeleton crew with which to bring her home, anyway. "I look forward to meeting you all."
"Well, how about that, folks, isn't he a saint?" The Ferengi seemed quite pleased by this turn of events, no doubt because she'd get another chance to schmooze with everyone. I walked and talked on the way to the transporter room, did some handshaking, graciously accepted congratulations from others, thanked the Risians, and stood by as the other potential buyers asked their questions and left, until it was just the Ferengi and I.
Much more casual than before, she turned to me and asked, "Well, that was exciting, wasn't it? Now, it's late, and as I said before, we'll take care of the details tomorrow. We'll transfer the command codes to you once the paperwork's done. Strictly speaking, The Risian government has already paid for the ship, so your agreement will be with them. Don't worry too much over that line about taxes and insurance. For now, anything else?"
I'd been thinking about it, and there were a few things I had to do. "Please draw up the paperwork for the Romulan Republic. I'm here under orders, and I can't accept this ship personally." The Ferengi nodded while I spoke. "Beyond that.. May I make a subspace transmission?"
The Ferengi gave an understanding smile and another nod. "Ahh, your Admiral will want to hear about this, hmm? Let's go back to the bridge." I walked with her. True to form, she continued her pitch, albeit in a low-key manner, pointing out small things as we went, obviously hoping we would purchase more. Arriving on the bridge, she ordered a crewman to open the channel, and I sat back in the captain's chair, the Ferengi taking the first officer's spot. By some stroke of cursed luck, Kererek was in his office and answered.
"Rake? Aren't you supposed to be enjoying the scenery?" he asked, blinking in surprise. Taking a breath and steeling myself, I explained.
Oh, how the Admiral laughed, my face flushing green with his amusement at my expense, while I wished for a personal cloaking device--or death. The Ferengi "helpfully" bantered with him, sending along images and recordings from the announcement, along with copies of some of the promotional material, and my notes, which the Admiral scanned. Eventually, he declared, "Well, that's quite a surprise, but a welcome one."
"Yes, sir," I agreed, still flushed. "Every ship makes a difference. My apologies about the acceptance and the name, the ship of course belongs to the Romulan people, but as you saw, I was a bit--"
"Oh, don't worry about that," interrupted the Admiral, literally waving me off, with as big a smile as I'd ever seen on his face. "Chironsala is a perfect name for your ship," he informed me, a twinkle in his eye.
"...My ship?" I felt a lump forming in my throat as I asked. Oh, no. Oh, no, no.. He wouldn't.
"Of course! You're a scientist, you said yourself it seems capable in that role, and it's certainly better equipped for combat than the Vadenius," he rightly observed. "As of right now, you are the person in the Romulan militia most familiar with her, and besides, you won her," he added, practically beaming with mirth, sealing my fate. "Who better to shake her down and take her to the front lines? Select your crew," he continued without a pause, "and let your First Officer know that the Vadenius is hers, if she wants her. You've both served with distinction. I'll notify Personnel and Materiel, and I await your arrival back here."
He would.
Admittedly, I felt a bit deflated. I was glad to have a new ship for the Republic, of course, but it was so ugly on the outside, and so ostentatious on the inside! And my name would be forever attached to it. I didn't dare undermine the Admiral by objecting in front of the Ferengi or her crew, though. In addition, they had just worked so hard to sell it, and had so graciously participated in awarding us one, it would've been rude to insult it. "Very well, sir. Thank you, for both of us."
"Fly her in good health. Kererek out." I'm not entirely sure, but I think I heard one more chuckle as he signed off. I took a breath, hoping my face would cool soon, and the Ferengi spoke first.
"Well then, that seems settled! Looks like she'll be yours after all. Don't worry, the Chironsala will serve you well, I guarantee it," the Ferengi assured me, smiling brightly once more.
"Enough to put it in writing?" I asked her grudgingly. She must have heard the defeat in my voice, and she expertly dodged the question. "Hey, cheer up.. This is a good day for you and the people of New Romulus, remember? New ship, new friends, new opportunities? Now all you have to do is seize them."
She may have been a slick saleswoman, but she was also right. I'd just have to get used to the Chironsala, she was going to be my new home. "Can we at least get better holographic records of me tomorrow, if you're going to plaster my face across your advertisements?"
The Ferengi laughed. "Of course."
Bonus: Why a Klingon would bother raising Risian birds
"Yesterday, a cheating human petaQ kicked my board during a race, and caused me to bounce off a rock trying to recover. Well, I once heard Captain Paris describe insulting another human by "giving him the bird." So I'm going to hatch this egg, find that petaQ, and give him the bird! Preferably by shoving it down his throat."
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As for the bonus - love it!
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