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alexmakepeace
Member Posts: 10,633 Arc User
in Ten Forward
Well, it is with both sadness and satisfaction that I make my last post. Sadness because a great project has come to an end, but satisfaction because as soon as I finish making and placing the post, The Great Forum Wall will be complete!
This wall, years in the making, now completely encircles the forum. Its purpose is to impede the movement of trolls, and hopefully prevent them from crossing. Of course, there are trolls on both sides of the wall already, but hey, I do what I'm told.
This should not be an impediment to normal people. There are numerous gates placed in the wall, such as the one below, which should allow normal people to pass freely while preventing trolls from passing.
The gates function by exploiting the Troll Reflex to All Movement (TRAM). When faced with an object capable of movement, such as a person, precarious boulder or, in our case, a gate, the troll's nociceptors (pain receptors) activate at low levels, followed by the Discoball Release Irritable Pathways (DRIP), which override all motor control until the troll drops a disco ball and incites the target object to motion, at which point the troll's body releases near-dangerous amounts of dopamine. As gates are unaffected by disco balls, the troll becomes stuck in DRIP mode and simply stands there, gritting his/her teeth until night falls and the gate is no longer visible, at which pint he/she will flee.
I am told my next project will be more ambitious: installation of a Banish Anti Necro Fire System. Supposedly, this expensive and elaborate system can put out flame wars, and is automatically activated when it senses the heat of flaring tempers. I have my doubts about this system, but maybe it can at least slow the flames down.
See ya around the forums!
This wall, years in the making, now completely encircles the forum. Its purpose is to impede the movement of trolls, and hopefully prevent them from crossing. Of course, there are trolls on both sides of the wall already, but hey, I do what I'm told.
This should not be an impediment to normal people. There are numerous gates placed in the wall, such as the one below, which should allow normal people to pass freely while preventing trolls from passing.
The gates function by exploiting the Troll Reflex to All Movement (TRAM). When faced with an object capable of movement, such as a person, precarious boulder or, in our case, a gate, the troll's nociceptors (pain receptors) activate at low levels, followed by the Discoball Release Irritable Pathways (DRIP), which override all motor control until the troll drops a disco ball and incites the target object to motion, at which point the troll's body releases near-dangerous amounts of dopamine. As gates are unaffected by disco balls, the troll becomes stuck in DRIP mode and simply stands there, gritting his/her teeth until night falls and the gate is no longer visible, at which pint he/she will flee.
I am told my next project will be more ambitious: installation of a Banish Anti Necro Fire System. Supposedly, this expensive and elaborate system can put out flame wars, and is automatically activated when it senses the heat of flaring tempers. I have my doubts about this system, but maybe it can at least slow the flames down.
See ya around the forums!
Check out my YouTube channel!
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Comments
That's the secondary defense. If you get too close to a section of wall with no gate, confusion generators kick in. Since trolls reflexively flame anything that confuses them, they just stand there, insulting the wall until they run out of insults and flee. Normal people just go "Huh. That's weird." and wander off to get back to what they were doing.
Does just drop for other players to get? Does it just dissapear in a puff of logic? Or does the Arch Mage Trendy get first dibs?
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