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It's April 1st again, and still no Flying Desks. WHY NOT?
illcadia
Member Posts: 1,412 Bug Hunter
Just like every year, it's April 1st again. Games around the globe are adding humourous single day events to herald this great holiday, adding fuzzy helper pets, additional factions or game modes (like War Thunder's jet pony faction), or cool one-off joke items.
And what does Star Trek Online get?
Nothing. Zilch. Nada. Zippo.
No neat humor items, no single day change to gameplay, no special events- It's only one day per year, and how do the devs celebrate it with us? I guess that's the joke, because we get NOTHING.
You know what I want? What I've wanted every April 1st since the game has launched? For just one day, I want to fly a desk.
It's a joke constantly made in Trek- about how admirals don't captain ships, they fly desks back at Starfleet Command. It comes up in just about every series, it's referenced in the movies, it's a joke that represents an entire mindset about the sort of captain we want to be- out there and exploring, fighting for what we value against implaccable enemies, and risking our lives to win the day- rather than hanging around home, safe and sound, flying a desk
So why not then, on this day that only comes once a year, let us fly a desk?
They exist. There's models for them all over the place- Earth Spacedock, Starfleet Academy, Q'onos, Romulan Command- every faction has their own style of desks. And every faction has its characters- and for most of them, they're even admirals.
The perfect way to celebrate this day and to pay homage to all those brave captains risking their lives out there in the cosmos is that of all days, today is the day we fly a desk and not out ship.
What does this mean in game terms? Simple. Replace all ship models with your captain's character model seated at a faction specific desk on a faction specific chair. Change weapon hardpoints as necessary, but otherwise leave everything else the same. Powers still activate, weapons still fire- it doesn't need to be super polished.
But let us fly a desk. Fighting the borg, or invading the Voth City ship, for this day of all days, give us this!
Just think of it- captains of every strike and faction, flying their desks boldly going where no one has gone before! Fighting the Borg, the Undine, the Voth, the enemies of the alpha and beta quadrants. Taking part in wargames, in PVP, putting their talents to use flying desks against rogues within their own factions, or allies participating in training exercises!
With a little time you could even have different styles of desk for different styles of ship. Big heavy desks for cruisers, small minamalist desks for escorts, or desks covered in paperwork, computers, and half-modified tricorders for science ships.
Think of the desks- and think of your captain flying one, on April 1st!
That's the game we could have- but instead another year's going by with no attention at all.
And what does Star Trek Online get?
Nothing. Zilch. Nada. Zippo.
No neat humor items, no single day change to gameplay, no special events- It's only one day per year, and how do the devs celebrate it with us? I guess that's the joke, because we get NOTHING.
You know what I want? What I've wanted every April 1st since the game has launched? For just one day, I want to fly a desk.
It's a joke constantly made in Trek- about how admirals don't captain ships, they fly desks back at Starfleet Command. It comes up in just about every series, it's referenced in the movies, it's a joke that represents an entire mindset about the sort of captain we want to be- out there and exploring, fighting for what we value against implaccable enemies, and risking our lives to win the day- rather than hanging around home, safe and sound, flying a desk
So why not then, on this day that only comes once a year, let us fly a desk?
They exist. There's models for them all over the place- Earth Spacedock, Starfleet Academy, Q'onos, Romulan Command- every faction has their own style of desks. And every faction has its characters- and for most of them, they're even admirals.
The perfect way to celebrate this day and to pay homage to all those brave captains risking their lives out there in the cosmos is that of all days, today is the day we fly a desk and not out ship.
What does this mean in game terms? Simple. Replace all ship models with your captain's character model seated at a faction specific desk on a faction specific chair. Change weapon hardpoints as necessary, but otherwise leave everything else the same. Powers still activate, weapons still fire- it doesn't need to be super polished.
But let us fly a desk. Fighting the borg, or invading the Voth City ship, for this day of all days, give us this!
Just think of it- captains of every strike and faction, flying their desks boldly going where no one has gone before! Fighting the Borg, the Undine, the Voth, the enemies of the alpha and beta quadrants. Taking part in wargames, in PVP, putting their talents to use flying desks against rogues within their own factions, or allies participating in training exercises!
With a little time you could even have different styles of desk for different styles of ship. Big heavy desks for cruisers, small minamalist desks for escorts, or desks covered in paperwork, computers, and half-modified tricorders for science ships.
Think of the desks- and think of your captain flying one, on April 1st!
That's the game we could have- but instead another year's going by with no attention at all.
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments
It would take like an hour to hook up, and not use any resources that would be involved in fixing events or bugs or whatever. Seriously, all the assets already exist, it's just a matter of skin replacing and weapon hardpoints.
We got Delta Rising last autumn. Not everybody feels up to pranks even 6 moths later.
Looking for a fun PvE fleet? Join us at Omega Combat Division today.
As amusing as some April Fools day pranks from games developers can be, I do tend to agree with this...
Mind you, my first thought when seeing the Iconic T6 ships blog was 'April Fools!'...
So don't play.
It'd inject some levity into the game and it'd take like an hour to set up.
The Playable Dragon was the joke, the Gelatinous Cube never was.
Ever get one of those annoying phone call in the middle of the night say, around 2 am?
Ever make an annoying phone call in the middle of the night, say around 2am?
Agreed rather have them invest their time in season ten then in jokes because april 1st is here...
So that said lets get to business ....
"Coffee: the finest organic suspension ever devised. It's got me through the worst of the last three years. I beat the Borg with it."
/5_char
Well yea perhaps you would. Others probably would rather see the devs attention to tend to bug fixes and general game quality before issuing nonsensical fun.
If you want a 1st aprils prank slot maxed out pilot and intel trees, 10 space traits, 4 reputation traits and 4 star ship traits (you paid and played a fortune for) and lag yourself trough ISA after you re-slotted your missing station boffs.
Looking for a fun PvE fleet? Join us at Omega Combat Division today.
or like Blizzard base an entire addon and a whole playable species, making appearances in 4 different games on an april folls joke.
Replace (or dress!) Quinn, J'mpok, and D'Tan with/as the above for a day
Douglas MacArthur - Quote on the dedication plaque of the U.S.S. Ranger NCC-97332-A Armitage class Fleet Heavy Strike Wing Escort.
As to the OP's rather bland assertion it would take an hour or so to replace ships and skins with a desk, I have a few questions:
1) How long has it taken to get a correct Galaxy mesh and texture in this game?
2) Aren't there enough things around here which are accidentally broken?
3) April Fool's can be proven to be non canon. Aren't there enough non canon elements in STO already?
4) Have you ever changed anything yourself in a game program and had it go off without a hitch?
5) The playerbase gets all up in arms at the mere mention of Disco Balls and you want the Dev team to change something they spent RL Currency on as a joke?
Making anyone's STO char fly a desk for one day as a joke is a really stupid idea in very poor taste and not something I am interested in doing. Ever. It is not funny either.
2. Their hilarious overreactions only make the joke(s) even funnier.
Alas, it's too late to request anything for April Fools now. You should've suggested it in january or something.
It would take considerably more time than that, and I suspect they'd have make it optional.
Now what they could do is add a flying Desk holoprojector akin to those available for latinum.
HQ is located on Vulcan. No sense of humour whatsoever.
Better yet, swap them around for a day. For a day have the KDF report to Quinn, the Feds report to D'Tan and the Rommies report to Quinn.
Just add a voiceover for each of them saying something like "Why are you talking to me? How did I get here? What is going on!?"
Then the day after, Q pops up to explain how hilarious his April Fools prank was.
No even crueler... make all the NPCs magically turn into Toven Khev's
Or that...
The end of the mission has the hologram gets rebooted and loses all memory of her past life, so instead of fighting you have a dance party. Afterwards you get a very rare photonic duty officer entertainer. Make available only during the first of April.
or Tasha Yar telling you she knows a thing or two about forcefields.
It's also why Ferenginar doesn't appear on the Galactic Map - Cryptic don't want hordes of players calling down orbital strikes on their office.
If I want to feel the spirit and atmosphere of April-fools, there's a carnival in town and themed parties all over the place in all the clubs. The devs here are better off fixing and catering to the game rather than wasting time on a 1-day trivial things.
Orly?
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