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Forums > Home› The Foundry for Star Trek Online› The Foundry for Star Trek Online - Mission Database

New Mission: Trouble on Talos IV

macfellymacfelly Member Posts: 107 Arc User
edited July 2013 in The Foundry for Star Trek Online - Mission Database
Put a lot of work into this one, just my take on going back to Talos IV

I've already spotted some punctuation errors so just ignore those for now.


Any constructive feedback welcome
Apparently not loyal enough :|
Post edited by macfelly on

Comments

  • frankhs30frankhs30 Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    Just played your mission tonight - enjoyed it - did not notice any thing that didn't work right. Could see that a lot of work had gone into it

    Good, no great story line

    frankhs30

    love your Kevin Smith quote
    frankhs30

    Kotagh II and L'ael on KDF - House of Duras
    T'Pur in Federation Sol Trade Consortium Fleet
  • teklionbenrashateklionbenrasha Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    The title's caught my eye...off to play now!
  • teklionbenrashateklionbenrasha Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    Overall, not a bad mission. However, there are several things that could do with improvement on to make it a great mission.

    Firstly, there is not a lot of explanation for why this is happening. The order relating to this planet is the most severe - nobody approaches under any circumstances. To have two ships and a science team studying it seems unlikely without a good deal of explanation - which didn't come.

    Secondly, there were a lot of SPG issues - chiefly a lack of punctuation in sentences that made them very hard to read (full stops at the end of sentences and things).

    Thirdly, your style. The key thing here is the titles of some of the objectives. They need to be clear and to the point. "Speak to the Talosian" = great, I know what I need to do. "They're like rats" or "cleanup on aisle 3" may be amusing but they're not helpful. The only other point on that is that sometimes it felt a bit casual - my officer calling me by my first name and the like - but that's partly a stylistic thing and might be ok.


    ON THE OTHER HAND (lest this look like I'm just moaning)...

    Other bits of this were fantastic! A lot of detail, especially on the maps and the costumes. You clearly put a lot of work into it, hence the tip. And thank you thank you THANK YOU for being so clear with the direction to the star systems, which often stumps foundry players if it's not crystal clear.

    Well done!
  • vaelinpaladinvaelinpaladin Member Posts: 8 Arc User
    edited July 2013
    I wanted to try it out, but couldn't find it. Did you pull it for now?

    EDIT: My error - Fed side. Checking it out!

    Enjoyed it - nice work customizing maps. Nothing to add here that hasn't been stated already.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] "Shut up, Wesley!"
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