Sagely Tiger Wisdoms

Kieve - Dreamweaver

I thought it would be entertaining to have a record of the random insightful quips I and others sometimes conjure up.

1. Chickens are for eating, not for sexing.
2. It is possible to kick someone so hard they fall out of the space-time continuum. This has only happened once, but they won't stop making movie spin-offs of it.
3. I hope to outlive my expiration date.
4. Dead dinosaurs become oil, becomes plastic, becomes toy dinosaur. Is it reincarnation or irony?
5. The only thing I find embarrassing is how these quips veer so rapidly into the realm of bad slash fiction. I wonder if there's something the conversational GPS failed to mention.
6. Alpacalypse and the Four Drama-Llamas, ungulate harbingers of Forumgeddon. It is posted that at the end of times, the dead threads shall rise, trolls roam unchecked, and all shall be sent to the Lower Depths for judgement.

You may post your own, providing they are suitably lulzy and random.

Stalker__ - Archosaur

"I am too drunk to taste this chicken...." -Colonel Sanders
"Some days in life you are the bird and others you are the statue...."
"If you live in a glass house, change in the basement."
"Crowded elevator smells different to midget."
"Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film...."
"To be able to fly is to be able to throw yourself at the ground and miss."

Lairian - Sanctuary

"Why do we park on a driveway and drive on a parkway?"

"Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together."

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing."

"Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from. "

"Never get into a battle of wits with an idiot. They'll bring you down to their level and beat you with experience."

"Dogs have masters. Cats have staff."

"There is a theory that states that if ever for any reason discovers what exactly the Universe is for and why it is here it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another that states that this has already happened."

Xarathox - Dreamweaver

"Ability is what will get you to the top if the boss has no daughter."

"Adversity - The only diet that will reduce a fat head."

"Give someone the gift that keeps on giving - a Rabbit."

"The secret to looking young is being young!"

"Sometimes when you are arguing with a fool, he's doing the same thing!"

"People who know the least always argues the most." (probably the most relevant on these forums)