Archosaur needs a Comedy Club...

Vindrael - Lost City
Vindrael - Lost City Posts: 165 Arc User
edited April 2011 in Etherblade (West)
A magician worked on a cruise ship. The audience was different each week, so the magician did the same tricks over and over again.

There was one problem. The captain's parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the magician did every trick. Once he understood, he started shouting in the middle of the show "Look, it's not the same hat!" or, "Look, he's hiding the flowers under the table," or "Hey, why are all the cards the ace of spades?"

The magician was furious, but couldn't do anything. It was, after all, the captain's parrot. Then the ship sank. The magician found himself on a piece of wood in the middle of the sea with, as fate would have it, the parrot.

They stared at each other with hatred, but did not utter a word. This went on for a day and then another and then another.

Finally on the fourth day, the parrot could not hold back and said,

"OK, I give up. Where's the fu***ng ship?"

b:laugh

I am in a laughing mood today. Anyone else have a good joke to share?
Post edited by Vindrael - Lost City on

Comments

  • DuckTapez - Archosaur
    DuckTapez - Archosaur Posts: 855 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    our entire forums is a comedy club >___>"
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    Duct tape is like The Force: bright on one side, dark on the other. It holds the world together, and, if not handled correctly, becomes a sticky mess.
  • Vindrael - Lost City
    Vindrael - Lost City Posts: 165 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    Well, here's another one...


    A mother is driving her little girl to her friend's house for a play date.

    Mommy, the little girl asks, how old are you?

    Honey, you are not supposed to ask a lady her age, the mother replied. It's not polite.

    OK' the little girl says, How much do you weigh?

    Now really, the mother says, those are personal questions and are really none of your business.

    Undaunted, the little girl asks, Why did you and Daddy get a divorce?

    That's enough questions, young lady! Honestly!

    The exasperated mother walks away as the two friends begin to play.

    My Mom won't tell me anything about her, the little girl says to her friend.

    Well, says the friend, all you need to do is look at her driver's license. It's like a report card, it has everything on it.

    Later that night the little girl says to her mother, I know how old you are. You are 32.

    The mother is surprised and asks, How did you find that out?

    I also know that you weigh 130 pounds.


    The mother is past surprised and shocked now. How in Heaven's name did you find that out?


    And, the little girl says triumphantly I know why you and daddy got a divorce.


    Oh really? the mother asks. Why?





    Because you got an F in sex.

    b:chuckle
  • Delsedora - Archosaur
    Delsedora - Archosaur Posts: 86 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    DuckTapez - Archosaur wrote: »
    our entire forums is a comedy club >___>"

    agree.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Anthemyra - Archosaur
    Anthemyra - Archosaur Posts: 247 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    Vindrael - Lost City wrote: »
    A magician worked on a cruise ship. The audience was different each week, so the magician did the same tricks over and over again.

    There was one problem. The captain's parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the magician did every trick. Once he understood, he started shouting in the middle of the show "Look, it's not the same hat!" or, "Look, he's hiding the flowers under the table," or "Hey, why are all the cards the ace of spades?"

    The magician was furious, but couldn't do anything. It was, after all, the captain's parrot. Then the ship sank. The magician found himself on a piece of wood in the middle of the sea with, as fate would have it, the parrot.

    They stared at each other with hatred, but did not utter a word. This went on for a day and then another and then another.

    Finally on the fourth day, the parrot could not hold back and said,

    "OK, I give up. Where's the fu***ng ship?"

    b:laugh

    I am in a laughing mood today. Anyone else have a good joke to share?

    :D ty Vindrael ... u did put a smile on my face this morning... but prob. this thread will "die" pretty soon ... no "Arch politics" in it and nothing to QQ about ... :)
  • StudmuffinIX - Archosaur
    StudmuffinIX - Archosaur Posts: 443 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    Anthemyra - Archosaur wrote: »
    :D ty Vindrael ... u did put a smile on my face this morning... but prob. this thread will "die" pretty soon ... no "Arch politics" in it and nothing to QQ about ... :)

    There is always something to QQ about, just give me a min to think......
    .
    .
    .
    Ok I got it QQ wheres the ship, someone from Zulu or nemesis stole it (depending what faction ur in) D:
  • Anthemyra - Archosaur
    Anthemyra - Archosaur Posts: 247 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    StudmuffinIX - Archosaur wrote: »
    There is always something to QQ about, just give me a min to think......
    .
    .
    .
    Ok I got it QQ wheres the ship, someone from Zulu or nemesis stole it (depending what faction ur in) D:

    XD...
  • Sneaky_Pants - Archosaur
    Sneaky_Pants - Archosaur Posts: 6 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    StudmuffinIX - Archosaur wrote: »
    There is always something to QQ about, just give me a min to think......
    .
    .
    .
    Ok I got it QQ wheres the ship, someone from Zulu or nemesis stole it (depending what faction ur in) D:

    You're an idiot b:laughb:pleasedb:victory

    I stole it fool!
  • Abstractive - Archosaur
    Abstractive - Archosaur Posts: 1,232 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    Wow, what a g. g. g...g. great audience.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Bodyguard for Secret Passage at your service, now accepting daily installments of just 2.5m for your leisure.
  • BLOODMYSTIC - Archosaur
    BLOODMYSTIC - Archosaur Posts: 1,842 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    Abstractive - Archosaur wrote: »
    Wow, what a g. g. g...g. great audience.

    south park!
    "And as for bragging, I don't need to brag. I am famous, yo. My accomplishments are legendary. I am BLOODMYSTIC, speaker of truth, bane of the Barbarians of Impulse, slayer of the **** of Narla, liberator of all the free peoples of the Archosaur server, former master propagandist for our leader in freedom, Proski, and Archtroll of the PWI Forums. And now? Amiable pve wizard, beloved by all, aka BLUEMYSTIC. Pleased to make your acquaintance."
  • StudmuffinIX - Archosaur
    StudmuffinIX - Archosaur Posts: 443 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    Sneaky_Pants - Archosaur wrote: »
    You're an idiot b:laughb:pleasedb:victory

    I stole it fool!

    A immunity spy stole it OMG!!!!!!!!


    *kicks zaibeast from faction*
  • Anthemyra - Archosaur
    Anthemyra - Archosaur Posts: 247 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    ... and the thread died b:chuckle

    Ty Vindrael for the try :D
  • NoLyf - Archosaur
    NoLyf - Archosaur Posts: 145 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    Banana jumped off ship when he saw zulusive members on it...???b:surrender
  • NoLyf - Archosaur
    NoLyf - Archosaur Posts: 145 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    failbreasts i d rather believe my 2 yr kid sister stole the ship than u

    u fAil ...b:kiss
  • WnbTank - Archosaur
    WnbTank - Archosaur Posts: 1,472 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    Video from Nemesis heading towards PWI office building last december.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wUw-qRihn7k&feature=related


    Sorry, I forgot only mango was allowed to do this but kitty is rebelling against the system!
    Trolling Sid since So Hot :o
  • Kehrendorh - Archosaur
    Kehrendorh - Archosaur Posts: 492 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    wnbtank - Archosaur wrote: »
    video From Nemesis Heading Towards Pwi Office Building Last December.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wuw-qrihn7k&feature=related


    Sorry, I Forgot Only Mango Was Allowed To Do This But Kitty Is Rebelling Against The System!

    hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
  • Anthemyra - Archosaur
    Anthemyra - Archosaur Posts: 247 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    :O here comes the "politics" ... ty wnb for saveing the thread b:victory ...
  • Valrain - Archosaur
    Valrain - Archosaur Posts: 105 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    Cable trying to drive a car b:chuckle

    Pannzer's car b:surrender
  • AuroraLucia - Archosaur
    AuroraLucia - Archosaur Posts: 279 Arc User
    edited January 2011
    A guy walks into a brothel and...

    Wait, sorry, can't tell that joke, it's not forum appropriate.
  • VileBlack - Archosaur
    VileBlack - Archosaur Posts: 164 Arc User
    edited April 2011
    So little Johnny is sitting in class and the teacher says

    "The word of the day today is fascinate, would anybody like to use it in a sentence?"

    Little Johnny instantly raises his hand, but the teacher passes over him and mumbles

    "I'm not picking him, little weirdo"

    So the teacher calls on Susie who replies

    "My daddy has a boat and it's really fascinating to me."

    The tacher says "no, no, no the word is F.A.S.C.I.N.A.T.E not fascinating"

    So once again she goes around the room, little Jonny's hand still in the air

    She calls on Mike who then says

    "I was fascinated by the animals at the zoo."

    The teacher saya "NO! fascinate not fascinated"

    Then says "Ok fine little Johnny, go ahead"

    Little Johnny: "My sister's **** are so big that she has a ten button shirt but can
    only fasten eight!"

    fuchsia say:"Man whos goes to bed with itchy sphincter, wakes up with smelly finger"
  • BLOODMYSTIC - Archosaur
    BLOODMYSTIC - Archosaur Posts: 1,842 Arc User
    edited April 2011
    Necro
    "And as for bragging, I don't need to brag. I am famous, yo. My accomplishments are legendary. I am BLOODMYSTIC, speaker of truth, bane of the Barbarians of Impulse, slayer of the **** of Narla, liberator of all the free peoples of the Archosaur server, former master propagandist for our leader in freedom, Proski, and Archtroll of the PWI Forums. And now? Amiable pve wizard, beloved by all, aka BLUEMYSTIC. Pleased to make your acquaintance."

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