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Astral Raiders

coinocoino Member, Neverwinter Beta Users, Neverwinter Hero Users Posts: 14 Arc User
edited February 2014 in Foundry Quest Database
Hey all!

Looking to trade reviews or anyone to run my quest.

Name: Astral Raiders. short code : NW-DKGFPBCEN.

Alternatively just type astral in the for review search box and it comes up.


Mix of witty dialogue and combat quest. Made challenging for mid-high levels because of monster scaling but moderate if run at/around 20s to 30s. If you want to be a pirate check it out :P

For review trades leave me your short code or name on here or mail me ingame @coino.
Post edited by coino on

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    rigelliarigellia Member Posts: 30
    edited February 2014
    Hey coino,

    I'll play your quest. If you'd like to play my quest, that'd make me happy.
    Search "The Orb of Avalon", short code: NW-DPIJSYAI7 under the 'New' tab.
    It doesn't need any more reviews, but I am happy to accept any feedback or suggestions you have. My just became eligible for daily so you can run it for that if you want to as well.
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    coinocoino Member, Neverwinter Beta Users, Neverwinter Hero Users Posts: 14 Arc User
    edited February 2014
    Ill play it right now :)
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    rigelliarigellia Member Posts: 30
    edited February 2014
    Whoops, sorry, I accidentally used the barrel in the first room on the Terrorsquay to exit your quest. Unless your quest is broken, you shouldn't need to have it. Either get it removed or put a disclaimer before it.

    Unfortunately I have to leave to go out soon. I'll try your quest again in a couple of hours.
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    coinocoino Member, Neverwinter Beta Users, Neverwinter Hero Users Posts: 14 Arc User
    edited February 2014
    Noted! youre the second person to do that >.< ill remove it.
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    rigelliarigellia Member Posts: 30
    edited February 2014
    Sorry, I've been having terrible connection issues as of late so I haven't finished my testing or been able to give a review yet.

    Just a few general thoughts on playing through so far:

    - You need to go and do a sweep of grammar and spelling. Lots of missing apostrophes and proper nouns are not being written in capital.

    - I think Captain Brunch's cabin room could do with a bit more decoration. Being a pirate captain, I would expect more swords, cutlasses, booty and heck, even a pirate parrot or monkey probably.

    - There's a remaining emergency exit in the Ithilid raid map. You should probably remove it.

    - In the ithilid raid map, one of the dungeon archways has some weird graphical glitches. It looks as if it may have been placed incorrectly.

    - There are quite a lot of hard difficulty mobs. This could be a very difficult map for most players.

    - On the map with the orc airships, orcs and the player survive the fall if they happen to fall off the ships. This is problematic if you happen to fall off or if an enemy orc falls off as both cases leads to you being stuck on the bottom (either from having fallen off, or being forced to jump off the ship in order to kill the fallen orc/ogre). I suggest find a way to kill them all instantly, or add a way for the player to go up/down to the bottom floor (maybe use an anchor and an invisible clicky tunnel?)

    Don't worry, I will eventually get around to finishing and leaving a review for this map eventually. For now, I need to sleep.
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    saiyaku87saiyaku87 Member, Neverwinter Beta Users Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited February 2014
    hi coino ^^ i would love to take you up on that offer for a review, i'm trying to get all the reviews i can haha, so I played your quest and here are my notes:

    • on the first trail path it says "opportunitys", should be "opportunities" (well actually it should be "job openings" or "available jobs" ^^)
    • all of the dialogue options with Fronikahn were orange, instead of just the quest advancement ones
    • you should add class restrictions to the dialogue options on the captain. Like, for example, only rogues can select the "I'm so sneaky" and so on
    • you could make the map on the captain's table interactive, but not a portal. like "take this map and wait for me at [location]" and then exit through a door... it looks kind of weird to be exiting through a map haha
    • you could make the elves patrolling around, not just waiting in the middle of the road to be killed :D
    • you could add animations for looting the dowry chests
    • you could rename the wood pile from "Village Woodpile 01" to just "Woodpile"
    • a suggestion: make it so the player places the wood down, instead the wood appearing by itself.
      You can do that by adding a "invisible" item as the targed, which says "place wood here" and make the woodpile appear after the interaction is complete
    • all the dialogue options with the captain after the woods is orange are orange as well
    • at the end when the ship appears in the cave the anchor chain is in the ground, instead of attached to the ship
    • you could add some pirates defending the ship when it's under attack
    • when i had to use the barrels it said "set the oil barrels alight to cripple the ship" idk if this was changed post-edit but i didn't move the barrels, i set them on fire :D
    • the first steering wheel disappeared after i used it

    and that's about it heh

    overall it was a funny quest, the capn' crunch reference was cool (even though im european i got it haha).
    the encounters were a bit crunched together, in the caves and in the ship... if a player was in a group - then sure, it's okay, but soloing was a bit tough. Though it may appeal to some people as challenging haha.
    But the encounters were still too in-together, they were all crunched in the player like a big mob, i could barely dodge out there was no space haha

    rated 4 only because of the encounters, they irked me a bit haha

    i have this campaign im planning and i would love it if you could look at the first quest ^^


    http://nw-forum.perfectworld.com/showthread.php?598511-Review-Trade-Child-of-the-Night
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    rigelliarigellia Member Posts: 30
    edited February 2014
    Hey coino,

    I've finally finished your quest and left an in-game review. I thought it was enjoyable, but was quite difficult/challenging.
    Now that I'm done, allow me to give you my full impressions:

    General impressions:

    - dialogue was actually quite humorous. Things did get particularly bonkers during this quest, but it was consistently bonkers so that's good :)

    - Like Saiyaku said, encounters were a bit too close together - especially when the orcs were attacking. I managed as a Guardian Fighter, but I would imagine a cleric or any character that needs to kite would have a much tougher time as you can't really pull any of the mobs.

    - I generally agree with all of the suggestions that Saiyaku made above me ^

    - I like quests that make you be evil/bad. However, I didn't feel quite that evil in this quest. Ithilids are generally evil to begin with, as well as orcs. The elves and the prince... they didn't have enough character to them so they may as well have been Nashers for all I cared.

    - Speaking of character, I would suggest making the Elves say stuff during combat or have a cutscene before you face the Prince. I really thought you could have made the player's actions and the pirates seem a bit more evil than you could have.

    - Go through your dialogues and quest objectives and put in those apostrophes and capitalise names and places. Quite a lot of typos in this quest.

    - This may be just me, but this quest is quite... macho. Keep in mind, not just males play Neverwinter, so I would suggest adding dialogue options that cater for pirates who maybe prefer being the awe of men, rather than having ladies swoon for them. Some gender neutral options would be helpful. Again, just a thought from me which you do not necessarily have to take on.

    Being nitpicky:

    - I noticed a fly buzzing noise in the Captain's cabin. It's an annoying ambient noise associated with that room - do with it what you will. I'd personally get rid of it, but it's a minor thing.

    - Speaking of noises, I definitely recommend adding sounds and music to this quest. Maybe having explosion/bang noises play when you read about explosions whizzing past you when the orcs attack would have made that scene great.

    - I noticed in the dialogue about getting into the catapault, the player says "I should have been a dwarf" or something like that. Keep in mind, some player characters ARE dwarves so, you should probably change that.

    - I noticed some of the enemies in the elf raid had misspelled names, like "Wood Olf Stalker" and "Roayl Guard". You better get around to fixing that.

    - I've mentioned this in a previous post, but it's worth reiterating: definitely add more decor to the Captain's cabin. I could see some decorations there, but not enough that would be fit for a Captain I think.

    - Everything I mentioned previously ^

    In it's current state, I'd rate this quest either 3/5 or 3.5/5. Good storyline, but you need to work on the map details and proofread through your dialogues with all characters/objectives.
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    tipadaknifetipadaknife Member Posts: 229 Arc User
    edited February 2014
    Playing this one now. Forewarned, I am running it with my 14K GF :)

    "A home of scoundrels and theives im sure" -- "Home to scoundrels and thieves, I'm sure!" If she's recruiting, shouldn't she be more certain where she's sending the potential pirates she is flagging down?

    "Aw yeh, let the swooning begin" -- "Aw, yeah." I'm not going to mention any more misspellings past these, but you might want to cut and paste your dialog from something like Word or Google Docs to ensure it's all spelled nicely. Spelling and grammar were kinda weak throughout -- makes your foundry seem less professional.

    Ratsknuckle Alley is through a door into a home?

    Been three or so maps and I'm still not pirating. Would it be possible to move the action along a little more quickly? Maybe start the adventure out by going to Ratsknuckle Alley?

    I'm going to start saying "Grass off cobba!" to everyone now :) They better darn well grass off!

    Signing a document is an odd way to be transported to a ship. Consider some sort of exit door or something?

    Are we now on board a ship? With a fireplace? Ouch.

    Might be nice to add a small story element of bringing the wood from the wagons to make the signal fire.

    Love the dialog! Just the spelling takes away from it.

    Error on the door transition into the Illithid mines, should add a frame to we can't see the one-sided texture.

    Nice details in the Illithid caverns.

    When Captain Brunch comes by after the Illithid Lord fight, the anchor is stuck in the ground, and the chain only goes up a little way, not nearly all the way to the ship.

    Loved seeing the other ship hanging in the void next to ours -- VERY nicely done. Sound design, the deck details, all wonderful.

    When I tried to board the other ship, I fell THROUGH a netting into the bottom of the map and can't seem to find a way back up. I left the map but couldn't find a way back into the adventure, so... I guess I have to abandon it. I'm sorry I couldn't finish it -- the astral ship battle was really fun up until the time I fell through an object.

    If you could play and review Tempest in a Freepot, short code in my sig, I'd be really thankful.

    Thanks!
    dec2014nwsig.png
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