trading reviews and looking for beta reviews please...

casekuk · July 2013

Hi all, been away for a little while, busy working on my foundry quest... back now and looking for some beta testing and critique on my Part 2 please

I have had a great response over my first part and part 2 has been in production for a very long time... Feel free of course to play through both, just understand that Part 1 is my first and as such a little rough around the edges. It's part 2 that I care about right now!

There is a re-cap in part 2, that will tell you the story from part 1 anyway, so it's more than feasible to skip part 1.

The story has been fleshed out to have a big finish in part 4! I am quite proud of the story, and would like to know if it makes sense, so far and flows ok. Everyone's critique on this will be greatly appreciated.

All environments in part 1 and part 2 are hand made, with over 4000 items carefully placed to make the zones feel natural, and in keeping with the fantasy feel of Neverwinter, again your thoughts on this are greatly appreciated.

Please remember it IS beta... and I want you guys to help me make it better.

Thanks in advance all... I will be review trading until I start work on part 3.

NW DAVOJC8N7

pris23 · July 2013

Just checked out both Part 1 and Part 2. I will send you a PM with my detailed feedback. Thanks so much for the fun quests.

If you would be so kind as to check out my campaign quest: Part 3 I would appreciate it. While I would love for you to play the first 2 in my campaign, it will not be necessary for you to understand the story and still have a good time. My review thread for it is http://nw-forum.perfectworld.com/showthread.php?407831-Part-3-Wind-of-the-North-The-Secret-to-Paradise-Will-trade-as-always

Thanks again and happy questing/building.

P.S. Your environments were amazing!

Also, is this actually set as a campaign? I could only find these quests through using the separate short-codes.

jintortle · July 2013

I am off to look at part 1 and 2 now!

I will leave a message here when done and maybe some notes but will probably also send you a PM.

Finished Part 1. Pretty decent. I did find though the mobs right at the spawn point at the first map a little overwhelming.
One move unawares and your ganked by an elite - possible 2. But overall it was good. I am now curious for the second part to see who the Portal Orc's are.

Finished Part 2. Interesting advancement of the story.
I liked the Recap at the Dying man - could use one at the beginning though to explain why I am there - was asking myself "Why am I here in these woods - what am I searching for?"
Was so delighted I saw some wolves - need more and maybe some bears instead of Spiders - seemed monotonous with just Foulspawn and Spiders in the first part (almost identical to first part of the campaign).

Backpack 01 in Portal Jumpers Camp.
Also the dying man was called "Dustman Private" - seemed strange maybe "Private Dustman" would be a better fit - but also in the Dialogue I think he said his name and it was different????

I loved the Town and the mobs rushing in to attack the newly spawned.

I hope you found my play through helpful.

If you would please look at my 2 beta Foundries in reply (in my signature) - that would be great.

Cheers

lolsorhand · July 2013

I'll play this today

lolsorhand · July 2013

Played and enjoyed, good work with the enviroments

Left you a PM!

casekuk · July 2013

I am off to try out some of these in return review tonight, thanks for the feedback folks, much appreciated.

I really must get the campaign on Spotlight, it's on the list of to-do's

Art (aka Casek)

xpurpleinsanityx · July 2013

I'll take a look here in a bit.

As you can see, I have released my part 2 as well

Also..I have not only revamped parts of my part 1, but made it more clear how to get to the shortcut back in the caves..if you are wanting to ever revisit that at this point

thanks

will update when ive run yours ~

Edit: Played/Reviewed~ Very nice job. The environments are very well put together and the dialog is engaging. The story is getting very interesting, looking forward to your further continuation.

casekuk · July 2013

Sorry guys, I got roped in to Tank with the guildies.. Will get round to it tomorrow.

Art (aka Casek)

casekuk · July 2013

Thanks for the fun Pris, I loved every moment of all 3 of your quests! It's your fault I havn't gotten round to anyone else's yet! lol.

Ok, who's next... Jintortle.. Your up!

Art (aka Casek)

yipykaye · July 2013

Playing A Mysterious Portal now *spoilers*

I see this so often, try not to leave the final option of dialogues at "continue" say "goodbye" or "you turn and head off" anything that finishes it off nicer then the stock continue.
Ok so the start got me straight away. The fire is on a wicked slope. It just would never be there. I died within 20 feet of the start because I have had to kill a dozen encounters that have wandered over including an elite boss.
Why are they here? I know I am looking for a portal but you need to tie the "why" in a little more than just spawning mobs to make it tough.
The whole first map could be done so much better. You put more detail into the barracks room than the outdoor area.
Plenty of spelling and grammer issues with the dialogue text. If you want to use that much then you need to make sure its right.
In the caves one of the bookshelves is floating above the ground. In fact heading through the caves I don't understand why foulspawn would have so many book shelves in their cave. Don't take them for big readers.
Another elite in the middle of the cave for no apparent reason. Would have made more sense to be a big fight at each of the cyrstal locations.
Not a big fan of magically porting from the barracks room direct to underground caves far away and then back to the room. Starting to feel like Dr Who in the Tardis and never knowing where I might turn up.

Ok overall pretty average quest. Biggest tip I can say is you need to make this one POP! This is your first quest in a campaign, you want people to want to try the others so this really needs to be spot on. Your areas need some work. The storyline is fine and you put alot of work into writing the dialogues but you have to follow up with detail. Don't get hung up by foundry limitations either. We all know the rewards are HAMSTER, I don't know anyone who would play these for the loot in final chest. Those players are in chat spamming for Exp TR wanted for quick Spider clear. We all have the same editor to work with and we find ways around the limits. Ask questions in the forums and chat for help. As I tell everyone this is feedback meant to help you make better foundrys. Hopefully my comments help you as others have helped me to become better.

casekuk · July 2013

Jintortle, love the humour of your quest, some very nice touches, nice twists, and a fun quest to play. Have PM'd you with more.

Still looking for more folks to try out my quest... I am good to my word with foundry trades, and would greatly appreciate getting my quest eligable for daily at least..

Thanks in advance...

Art (aka Casek)

casekuk · July 2013

Yipekaye, thanks for you rather 'harsh' review.. I'd like to address a couple of the areas you have pointed out.

I see this so often, try not to leave the final option of dialogues at "continue" say "goodbye" or "you turn and head off" anything that finishes it off nicer then the stock continue.

I totally agree, and cant for the life of me see that I have done this more than once! Even THAT once is a mistake and should never have made it out of playtest. However, sometimes the word 'continue' works, so don;t get too hung up on hating this just because it isn't changed.

Ok so the start got me straight away. The fire is on a wicked slope. It just would never be there. I died within 20 feet of the start because I have had to kill a dozen encounters that have wandered over including an elite boss.

Ok heres the deal.. I dont have time to re-write, and re-jig this quest.. As unfortunate as some of these things are, I feel they are 'part of my learning curve' and honestly I'm ok with them. They are indeed a little 'rough' around the edges, but honestly, when I created the first forest I had absolutely NO IDEA what I was doing. It was a wing and a prayer time, and yes I did some things wrong. The fire would not be there your right, but then neither would the portal, the foulspawn or the spiders... I feel your picking on the 'fire' to be a little too nit-picky. Not that I don't appreciate feedback, it just feels from your tone that you've 'had enough of repeating yourself' your tired with reviewing.

As for how hard it is.. I say in the description Dont go blundering into my maps. When I set out to make the forest, I wanted it to be hard, but I also wanted people to have to 'pull' mobs.. Go careful and 'work' at the quest... This obviously failed, as I have had no end of people telling me that the beginning is all wrong because of the seeming stacked encounters. I got it wrong, I'm cool with it.. It was my first, and if people cant accept it, then so be it! I did go back and tweak this particular area so that no mobs cross the spawn point (I even moved it backwards which is why the fire is on a slant) I learnt some valuable lessons, but won't re-work it now, as I have said. Believe it or not, a LOT of people have said it's too easy!! Go figure!

Why are they here? I know I am looking for a portal but you need to tie the "why" in a little more than just spawning mobs to make it tough. The whole first map could be done so much better. You put more detail into the barracks room than the outdoor area.

I've explained myself as to why the zone is like it is, but I question what you say about putting more detail into the barracks than the outdoor zone?? The outdoor zone took me HOURS, the Barracks took me 3 minutes! No kidding! So I have to call you on that, sorry you got that wrong.

Plenty of spelling and grammer issues with the dialogue text. If you want to use that much then you need to make sure its right.

I'm no writer, I don't profess to be, I'm just trying to tell a story. If people cant accept that I'm not a profesional game developer, then they need to go elsewhere to look for content. I'm doing my best, and harsh reviews like this really dont make me want to go and re-write it all (for the FOURTH - yes fourth time! I have changed MANY things, learnt a lot about writing to be honest, but I never once said anything about it being 100% grammatically correct.)

In the caves one of the bookshelves is floating above the ground. In fact heading through the caves I don't understand why foulspawn would have so many book shelves in their cave. Don't take them for big readers.
Another elite in the middle of the cave for no apparent reason. Would have made more sense to be a big fight at each of the cyrstal locations.

I tried my damndest to make it look like the foulspawn had taken over these caves.. The books are strewn everywhere, some are being used as fire fodder, and the bookcases are broken and aged. I wanted it to feel like someone else lived here before them, and I think I did rather well, but you cant please all the people all the time. As for 1 floating bookcase.. Really?

Your calling of the Elite in the middle of the cave for no reason baffles me?? Is this not how the entire game is? The fights are put there to keep fans of a good scrap happy, personally I'd leave them out but no one would like it then! I put the Necksplitter in there to 'mix it up' a bit.

Not a big fan of magically porting from the barracks room direct to underground caves far away and then back to the room. Starting to feel like Dr Who in the Tardis and never knowing where I might turn up.

Now this is what happens when you change it! I changed this from 'world map' to 'just travell' because MANY people had said they wern't fans of the overworld map! AND my quest seemed slightly bugged as it didnt have quest markers on the location icons! I changed it forthwith.

Hopefully my comments help you as others have helped me to become better.

I appreciate your feedback, it's the tone of it I didnt like very much, but thanks for your time. It's quite obvious you didnt like my quest very much, and thats fine. I will play yours with interest.

Art (aka Casek)

casekuk · July 2013

Playing whispers in the forest now...

Interesting that your's and my forest are so similar, yet you said I spent no time on mine? Surely you can see, as I can see from yours that a great deal of time has been spent...

The fight with the bears, while i appreciate what you've done here the bears have no animation, they do not 'attack' as it were. This is a failing with having to use NPC's I know but I went thorough this exact problem with Part 2 of my campaign. I decided to leave them out for this exact reason.. The fighting just looks goofy and weird. They sort of nose butt you occasionally.

I conceed completely that your attention to detail is better than mine, and your zone looks better also. I like the atmosphere, and the feel. Good job indeed. I would greatly appreciate your views on my second maps which took me several days to complete.

It seems I found a 'continue'.. whoops :P Bag in the tent at the camp.. But a really good case in point where the word 'continue' works in this instance. It doesn't 'need' to be changed. You could change it to 'Continue your search' maybe.. but it's not a biggie.

As I alighted to in the bears review, I'm not a fan of changing behaviors of mobs. The Spider Queen again doesn't really work for me, although I fully appreciate you want it to be a hard fight. I applaud the attempt for sure.

I don't know how much of these caves is your own work, but they look stunning, kudos to you for a brilliant design.

Ok so got through the rest without any real incident, and I think thats one of my problems with the quest as a whole. Don't get me wrong, I liked it, I liked it a lot actually, your forest zone puts mine to shame, I have no problem in accepting that. What the quest doesn't do is challenge me. Even the big fights were very easy (60 Wizzy) and there was just a little too much open space that felt like it needed to be filled.

Thanks for the fun, and thanks for your time reviewing mine.

Art (aka Casek)

yipykaye · July 2013

Honesty in reviews can be seen two ways.
Harsh if you don't care what that person thought about your quest.
Feedback if you want to learn from others perspectives to create better content.

I give feedback in dot points so that you can follow the flow of what I am saying as I progress in the quest. So although I point out the continue early on it is a minor thing not hating. Yes I used it in my quest for item descriptions but try not too for dialogue with NPC's.
I go into more detail for the forum community as well as the author. Thats why I post here and not send you a PM. I have learnt alot from reading forum posts about problems various people see in each others quests.

I don't remember seeing in your overview where it told me " I dont have time to re-write, and re-jig this quest" and " It was my first, and if people cant accept it, then so be it!" Had I know this I wouldnt have taken the time to write detailed feedback I would have simply played it on its merits. If you don't want feedback post in the description "This is First and Final edit no opinions required"

I look at it like this, If I was getting a house built and I was doing an inspection and saw cornice missing, roof tiles left off and poor finishing would I be happy saying, "Thats ok the builders only new and he's put hours of work into it so I don't care if its finished I am just supportive of his efforts." Call me crazy, nasty, harsh I don't mind I am just offering my opinion.

And well if my tone was wrong I am sorry that your opinion differs from mine.

And just so you know, my forest ambience has improved because I got feedback that was honest rather than empty praise. Yeah I had to rework a lot of it and it still is not finished. There are always somethings that can be improved.
Every person that wants to improve has someone telling them the things they are doing incorrectly.
I never meant to sound like I was attacking you as a person and author, I was trying to help in a coaching manner.
Maybe you wanted to hear a cheerleader instead. PS This body is not made for a short skirt. ;-)

casekuk · July 2013

God no, a cheerleader is 100% NOT what I want, but what you have to realise here is there are 100 levels between cheerleader and where you are. Just the comment 'Maybe you wanted to hear a cheerleader instead' surely you can see that as condescending? Even though it's given in jest as is shown by your little smiley at the end...

Look we are not here to discuss the finer points of the texted language, but you know as well as I do, that when text is 'read' without inflection, almost anything can sound harsh. 2 examples to clarify what I mean.

I see this so often, try not to leave the final option of dialogues at "continue" say "goodbye" or "you turn and head off" anything that finishes it off nicer then the stock continue.

This could be said SO much nicer than this:

I'm not a fan of leaving the conversation options as 'continue'...

Without inflection, yours reads like you are fed up of reviewing, you see this so often it's getting tedious and your beginning to let it come out in your text.

Plenty of spelling and grammer issues with the dialogue text. If you want to use that much then you need to make sure its right.

This is just insulting, and not 'constructive' in any way. ANYONE reading this would take offence at the way you have worded it, surely you can see that?

You might want to look at the grammar in the texts, there are still a few small errors there that need fixing. (or similar)

I'm not trying to be a HAMSTER Yipykaye, I'm just trying to explain 'why' I thought your first review harsh. I certainly do not mind constructive criticism, it's just that your review felt like a rant at **** foundry'ers who don't know what they are doing.(as honestly I didn't) As I have said, there are a thousand shades between downright rude (which for the record is not where you are, far from it) and decent.

I'm not sensitive, honestly and truthfully I couldn't give a monkies what you think of my foundry, plenty of people like it, and that makes me happy... What bothered me was your tone, and I hope you can at least begin to see what I'm talking about.

Art (aka Casek)

casekuk · July 2013

Anyone else feel like helping me out with some plays?

I now have a Spotlight foundry quest, which can be found by clicking on my Signature picture. Please leave any feedbacks there

Thanks,

Art (aka Casek)

xpurpleinsanityx · July 2013

Heya, wondering if you somehow missed my review? Seems like you might have. ^^ Was on page 1..

imperialmen · July 2013

Deleted.

EDIT: I will make a separate thread for mine, it will be easier to keep track and will give more exposure to quest. Trading requests can sent there

casekuk · July 2013

Ahh Purp!! So sorry my friend, I did indeed! You know why, I usually right them down and didnt this time, I will do it straight away and please accept my sincere apologies. I already know I'm gonna love it!

Art (aka Casek)

xpurpleinsanityx · July 2013

casekuk wrote: »

Ahh Purp!! So sorry my friend, I did indeed! You know why, I usually right them down and didnt this time, I will do it straight away and please accept my sincere apologies. I already know I'm gonna love it!

Art (aka Casek)

No prob.

Also, if you DO get the time...I have made a TON of changes to the first and also made the shortcut back in the caves much more clear, like I said.

redneckronin · July 2013

Loved the maps.

The detail of the ghost-town was just brilliant.
Really liked the twist the story has taken and thought some of the NPC's, Walli in particular, were just brilliantly done.

Have sent a PM with further notes.

All The Best

casekuk · July 2013

Wow, thank you Red! So glad you enjoyed it.

I know it's shameless plugging (the only thing that works), but I have recently greatly updated my first forest quest in The Mysterious Portal, thanks in part to your initial messaging that got me thinking how difficult it was.

Thanks again mate,

Art (aka Casek)

redneckronin · July 2013

casekuk wrote: »

Wow, thank you Red! So glad you enjoyed it.

I know it's shameless plugging (the only thing that works), but I have recently greatly updated my first forest quest in The Mysterious Portal, thanks in part to your initial messaging that got me thinking how difficult it was.

Thanks again mate,

Art (aka Casek)

Yeah, saw the thread.

Will give it a whirl tonight when I get back from hospital. Living out in the country-side has its advantages (not least that some of the external areas I try to create are in part inspired by the country-side around me), but the downside is I'm about to "waste" close to six hours on public transport to go for a final post-surgical check-up that will take, at most 10 minutes. Ah well.

All The Best

lightbringer1102 · July 2013

Hi reviewed your quest (mysterious portal) and liked it. Please take a look at mine. I play foundry quests alot these days and I review them, only because I find them more interesting than cryptic quests sometimes and off course i want reviews also. So please try my short 1st part quest that is a little heavy combat but it's solo-able if your proficient and alert in combat. You might want to play part 2 who knows, since the story gets interesting later on. Thanks in advanced! :-)

ambitionxp · July 2013

I reviewed it (Into the Forest). Good quest overall. I gave it 5 stars. The dialog seemed very involved and must have taken a long time to write.

If you have the time, please try my quest "The Cursed Armor of Steele". I'm trying to get it foundry eligible. The story is about recovering a suit of armor from the crypt of a soldier. Thanks.

casekuk · July 2013

Thanks Ambitionxp... Appreciate that!

I will add you to my ENORMOUS list and get to you asap... I have been tanking with my guild a lot recently and it's hard to say no when your just a group of 5 friends and they need you!

I will start racking these up but it will take me a little while.

Thanks for your patience all.

Art

trading reviews and looking for beta reviews please...

Comments