Will trade for reviews on The Secret to Paradise: Part 1 - Paradise Lost!

pris23 · June 2013

I need more reviews to make this public I believe and would appreciate anyone willing to take the time to check it out. It takes 30 min or less usually and already has 4 reviews with 4 stars (all solo players). I have to work for the next two days so do not be alarmed if I do not review immediately, but I promise to review it asap in trade. Thanks in advance for any feedback.

NW-DDMMIKYTB

A flier on the board reads: Adventurer's needed to check on a friend that I have not heard from in awhile. We have important business and I am worried. He lives in Paradise Manor and I am sure you will enjoy yourself upon arriving. If this seems like something you are interested in please come see me.

Sincerely,
Nobleman Burkhard

This is Part 1 of 5 quests in this campaign. At this time Part 1 is all that I have published, but the others will soon follow.

Note: This quest is intended to be challenging for 1 - 2 players. Don't forget to bring potions. Depending on your class/gear this can be very difficult for solo players. If you are solo bring quite a few potions.

Also, the sound does not always work. It works fine in foundry testing, but music will not always play when published. My apologies.

Please let me know what I can do to improve this in a constructive way.

I hope you enjoy the story and have fun!

Major issues fixed:
- The Spawn point in the Servant's Quarters is now out of the fireplace. I know it looks strange just out in the middle of the floor, but I did not want anymore folks to accidentally respawn inside the wall.

-WW Fighters now appear when they are intended to instead of jumping the player in the middle of an already difficult fight in the Dinning area.

Minor Issues Fixed:
- Invisible Clicky's are now named appropriately

- Some minor dialog changes have taken place to get rid of the sci-fi feel and keep it in the D&D type setting.

- Quest objectives have been cleaned up.

Things to come:
- I will continue to work on the background effects, sound and lighing.

-Part 2 - Into the Mist has been published for my testing purposes only. PART 2 IS BROKEN, PLEASE DO NOT PLAY IT. The foundry editor broke as soon as I published it and I can't fix it at this time.

I saw that a couple people played it already and I am sad because it is no where near ready for review. Please only play Part 1 at this time. Thank you.

I will continue to review your quests in kind, but it will take me some time to get through them all. I promise that I will review your quests too though. Please be patient. Thanks to everyone who has taken the time to review Part 1 and I hope that these changes satisfy for the time being.

maerwin · June 2013

- the first objective's interaction text is 'talk to Fallen Citizen'. Talking to dead people usually doesn't bring results
- you have several 'go to next map' objectives (Doctor's laboratory portal, door to the infested house/inn, portal back to the keep)
- when talking to one of Paradise's servants, the camera ends inside the fire
- just a thought: in the infested house, you could move the campfire from the odd place on the ground to the nearby fireplace.
- at the end, the Doctor's name is 'Customized Tiefling Male 8'

The link for my quest's thread is in my sig. I'll be looking forward to your review

pris23 · June 2013

Hey thanks.

It sounds like the main issues with my quest are cosmetic and not a story/combat issue. I really appreciate you taking the time to review it for me.

I have reviewed yours as well and posted my thoughts on your thread. Very fun story and I liked the characters. I also liked the ability to choose which way in the caves that you wanted to go to get into the temple.

pris23 · June 2013

Just figured that I would test my Signature while I was logged in. I want my quest to be visible so others can see it when I post in all threads because I am super excited to have completed my first Quest for my Campaign.

darknovae · June 2013

Hi, i just played your quest. The story line is good even if it remember some fictions about crazy scientists. And i really like the details, the opportunity to interact with a lot of people and objects.
Here are my feedbacks:
- Using some terms like "traps" instead of "defense system" will make the player remain in a medieval spirit (instead of sci-fi).

- The man dead in the room (near Miss iris) of servant's quarter need to get his real name (he is shown as " Invisible clicky sphere Half 01")

- To enter the Lab Gateway, maybe puting a door for more immersion. Because there is a wall to interact (maybe a false wall).

- I think you should up the difficulty. I play it with my rogue 25 and i was not worried about dying. Maybe it's my low level or because I like adrenalina . But according to me, more mobs packs would be more challenging (especially, for the last boss).

In conclusion, you did a good job with that quest, according to me. I will re check it soon

kinetta · June 2013

Hi, I played your quest and left a review. It was a good quest and I enjoyed playing it.

I'm hoping I can get a review on my quest.

The Vault of Sorrow
NW-DSTD2TUU3

pavvo · June 2013

Hi Just played your quest. Enjoyable

A couple of issues,
in the dining hall, one of the mobs (the troll i believe) was stuck in the middle of the table
Upstairs, the guy (Keryin I think) had his interaction listed as clicky thingy 01

And in contrary to what darknova has said, please do NOT encounter stack. It works fine when you're at 25, but even 2 standard encounters is an insta-wipe at 50s. I played as a 60 DC and died quite a few times in the dining hall, when everyone aggroed. And at that level, the fighters heal VERY often and the other mobs just chain-stun you.

Also, you don't need to add (1/4, 2/4) to your quest title. Just put the objectives side by side (instead of one after another)

Cheers.

Appreciate a review of my quests in return (links in sig)

pris23 · June 2013

darknovae wrote: »

Hi, i just played your quest. The story line is good even if it remember some fictions about crazy scientists. And i really like the details, the opportunity to interact with a lot of people and objects.
Here are my feedbacks:
- Using some terms like "traps" instead of "defense system" will make the player remain in a medieval spirit (instead of sci-fi).

Yes, I see what you mean here. I will take another look at his dialog and see about fixing that modern feel.

- The man dead in the room (near Miss iris) of servant's quarter need to get his real name (he is shown as " Invisible clicky sphere Half 01")

Thanks for mentioning the clicky thing on Kelvors body. I fixed a few dead NPC's because originally you had to "talk" to them in order to examine them. I finally figured out how you could examine them and forgot to change the name. Awesome point.

- To enter the Lab Gateway, maybe puting a door for more immersion. Because there is a wall to interact (maybe a false wall).

I did originally have a door, but the Lab Gateway is supposed to take you to a different realm of existence. After using the door for awhile I decided on the portal because it helps to visualize the magic nature of the Lab Gateway. I will consider the secret wall though for Parts 2-5.

Good suggestion thanks!

- I think you should up the difficulty. I play it with my rogue 25 and i was not worried about dying. Maybe it's my low level or because I like adrenalina . But according to me, more mobs packs would be more challenging (especially, for the last boss).

I can see where you are coming from. I must say though that I ran it as a level 55 cleric and it is quite challenging. I'll take another look and see if there is something that I can do to change that, but I want to make absolutely sure that solo players can beat this without any serious frustration. In some of the future parts the layouts will be different so it is a more likely possibility than in this particular map.

In conclusion, you did a good job with that quest, according to me. I will re check it soon

Thanks! I am glad that you liked it. I am almost finished with Part 2 - Into The Mist in which you begin to deal with the individual labs.

pris23 · June 2013

kinetta wrote: »

Hi, I played your quest and left a review. It was a good quest and I enjoyed playing it.

I'm hoping I can get a review on my quest.

The Vault of Sorrow
NW-DSTD2TUU3

I will get to it later today. Thank you for your review.

pris23 · June 2013

pavvo wrote: »

Hi Just played your quest. Enjoyable

A couple of issues,
in the dining hall, one of the mobs (the troll i believe) was stuck in the middle of the table

Thanks. I am not sure how that happened. I have never seen that happen in live testing, but I will recheck. Could just be a one time thing, but I will consider the troll placement more carefully.

And in contrary to what darknova has said, please do NOT encounter stack. It works fine when you're at 25, but even 2 standard encounters is an insta-wipe at 50s. I played as a 60 DC and died quite a few times in the dining hall, when everyone aggroed. And at that level, the fighters heal VERY often and the other mobs just chain-stun you.

I agree with you that in the 50's it is definitely much harder as some of the monsters heal themselves, etc. In fact that Dining room that you mention is not supposed to be that way. The WW Fighters are patrolling the top level, but for some reason they come running down the stairs sometimes before the player gets up there. I have tried every placement of them that I can think of up there and they still come running. Thankfully I think that it is still in the realm of challenging, but not frustrating so I left them for now. I am still able to do it at level 55. I will test again at 60.

Also, you don't need to add (1/4, 2/4) to your quest title. Just put the objectives side by side (instead of one after another)

Cheers.

Appreciate a review of my quests in return (links in sig)

I did not even know that I could put them side by side. Thanks! I was wondering how to do that so that people would not constantly see Objective A Completed now move on to objective A if you know what I mean. I'll do as suggested here so that won't happen and the 1/4, 2/4 will no longer be necessary.

As for your quests I promise to review at least one for every part of my quest reviewed. I absolutely love the foundry quests for the player generated content and will try to get to more than one, but it may take me some time to get through all of them.

bigglesvii · June 2013

Hi, just played your quest it's great. The only problem I had was spawning in the wall after dying trying to save the doctor. I spawned in the southern wall with a fireplace. Also I think it would be more suited to 2+ players as I'm a lvl 60 CW with a 10k GS and I died a few times before getting stuck. Apart from that it's great.

visigoth18 · June 2013

My review is encoding as I type, but I wanted to take the time to mention this while I was thinking about it

if you renamed your encounters to things like "(Encounter group: Escaped experiment) or (Test Subjects) something like that. I think it would be a huge improvement.

Edit: I thought of another tip (make a copy of your map "so you can make changes without the fear of messing anything up") then you can go in and play with "Map Background Effects" like find a good combination of sky, lighting, audio and fade effects

pris23 · June 2013

bigglesvii wrote: »

Hi, just played your quest it's great. The only problem I had was spawning in the wall after dying trying to save the doctor. I spawned in the southern wall with a fireplace. Also I think it would be more suited to 2+ players as I'm a lvl 60 CW with a 10k GS and I died a few times before getting stuck. Apart from that it's great.

Hey thanks for mentioning that. I tried to make the fire more believable by placing it in the fireplace, but had not considered that you could get stuck if you respawned there. Back to the drawing board on that one I guess.

Sorry about you getting stuck.

Also, the dining area is quite challenging as the mobs upstairs will not stay up there. I might need to put them in a room up there or something to keep this from happening. While this does not happen every time it does happen often enough to worry about. Thanks for your time and review.

pris23 · June 2013

visigoth18 wrote: »

if you renamed your encounters to things like "(Encounter group: Escaped experiment) or (Test Subjects) something like that. I think it would be a huge improvement.

Edit: I thought of another tip (make a copy of your map "so you can make changes without the fear of messing anything up") then you can go in and play with "Map Background Effects" like find a good combination of sky, lighting, audio and fade effects

The encounter names make sense at the end after you realize what is actually going on. I think I understand what you mean though at least in the earlier maps before the Lab Gateway.

Thanks for your feedback. I admit that I was quite impressed with the background effects and sounds in your Quest, The Headless Hero. Unfortunately I cannot seem to create anything quite that spectacular. I will take your suggestion of copying the map to see what happens when I change things. Good call there.

visigoth18 · June 2013

My Video Review

pris23 · June 2013

Wow, thanks for your time and effort in giving me a review. This is the first time I have ever tried to create something for a game like this. I realize that the first couple of areas seem a little low on objects and decor. Also, when you first enter Paradise Manor I realized that there was not a door. I had actually completely redone this map before publishing and it originally had a door, but I forgot to put one in the new version of the map. Good catch!

The dialog errors (typos and such) are probably due to me overthinking and redoing the dialog too many times. I fully intend to break the dialog up a bit and try to put in more player options. I was just excited and published maybe a tad early.

As for your thoughts on the magic portals....I completely understand your ideas about magic being special and sometimes cheapened by too much use. However, I felt that with the Doctor and Miss Iris both being mages that it was plausible that they had strange ways of travel only through the lab areas. The idea was that each part of the "Lab" was kind of its own realm of existence which is why I chose to use the portals instead of doors.I will certainly think on this idea and see if I can think of a better way. A high level wizard in D&D tabletop could memorize several dimensional door spells (or similar spells) to use throughout the day. That was the logic I was basing this on.

Thank you so much for your review. I will definitely watch it again.

P.S. I was really jealous and disappointed in my own quest with your book/character idea. That was awesome. I only wish that I had thought of that.

visigoth18 · June 2013

pris23 wrote: »

Wow, thanks for your time and effort in giving me a review.

your very welcome. I love seeing how players approach my content "so I figured others would like to see it too" and getting to take part in such a fun community is a blast >.<

pris23 wrote: »

This is the first time I have ever tried to create something for a game like this. I realize that the first couple of areas seem a little low on objects and decor.

:] for a first venture into a new experience "it was well done, Kudos to you". if you want, here is a video to help give you some Ideas of how you can increase the detail on your maps :] and a thread I find to be very accurate on how to go about working on map creation (How to)

pris23 wrote: »

The dialog errors (typos and such) are probably due to me over-thinking and redoing the dialog too many times.

lol, trust me I can completely identify with that

(I've had to do 'several hundred' passes on my dialogue, and I still constantly miss stuff) lol I end up with randomly Capitalized words everywhere >.< Tip: something that helps me "you might already do this" I work on and save my dialogue in 'Word' then just copy paste it in.

pris23 wrote: »

The idea was that each part of the "Lab" was kind of its own realm of existence which is why I chose to use the portals instead of doors.

This is a cool idea "this idea is 'EPIC' so using magic fits in well with this' but other then the portals this idea isn't conveyed to the player. so expanding on the "lore/ back-story" for your lab idea would be cool.

pris23 wrote: »

I was really jealous and disappointed in my own quest with your book/character idea. That was awesome. I only wish that I had thought of that.

lol I totally thought it was going that way too >.<

-Visigoth

Well I hope this is helpful, and good luck with your quest

pris23 · June 2013

OK guys. I think I have published the final version of this quest. If you have the extra time and want to run it again I have made the following improvements:

- Added some decor to help with immersion.

- Cleaned up the dialog so that it is not in such large blocks.

- Cleaned up some of the inspect dialogs as well.

If anyone notices any bugs please let me know. I am beginning to create Part 2 - Into the Mist now so I will be trying to finish up with this one as soon as possible.

Thanks again for all your help.

lolsorhand · June 2013

Details look good, story is interesting. Though feels like a certain tent would have caught fire or worse

Would like experiments to look more sculptured/self made.
Perhaps add music to the tougher encounters such as when you enter a house. ( Perhaps even add a difficulty slider here, I loved it. Tough fight

But some don't. (Also why I want to so badly revisit my first map. )

Would have wanted more music in the quest, some details are clipping. (But most are nitpicks, the music being one of the main factors. As well as NPC emotes in text, they add alot to me atleast.)

Edit: Perhaps customize the experiments abit further as well, but just nitpick.

pris23 · June 2013

lolsorhand wrote: »

Details look good, story is interesting. Though feels like a certain tent would have caught fire or worse
Would like experiments to look more sculptured/self made.

I would like that as well. This is my first try with the foundry so I decided to use what they had with a few minor tweaks and focus more on story, difficulty balance, and environments.

Perhaps add music to the tougher encounters such as when you enter a house. ( Perhaps even add a difficulty slider here, I loved it. Tough fight But some don't. (Also why I want to so badly revisit my first map. )

I agree with you completely about the difficulty slider which I will have in Part 2 when it is finished. As for the music, I know Cryptic said this is fixed, but clearly it is not since you didn't hear it. I added music and/or sounds to every map as soon as that sound bug was supposedly fixed. I am sorry that you could not experience it.

Would have wanted more music in the quest, some details are clipping. (But most are nitpicks, the music being one of the main factors. As well as NPC emotes in text, they add alot to me atleast.)

Edit: Perhaps customize the experiments abit further as well, but just nitpick.

I am in total agreement with you about the NPCs emotes. I am bad about that and in some cases I just wasn't happy with my options vs. what they were saying. I will take another look though because I agree that they should have more life. I don't want anyone to just stand there blank faced while they are talking to you.

Thanks for checking my quest out. Soon I will have Part 2 ready and will post that here in the forums so if you are interested you can continue the story line.

avatre21 · June 2013

Hey, I've just finished playing your quest and thought it was very well done, with good attention to detail. I enjoyed reading through all the dialogue and different interactables. I'm looking forward to playing the second when it's complete to see what happens next!

If you get a chance, I'd appreciate it if you could take a look at either one of my quests in the sig. Thank you.

pris23 · June 2013

avatre21 wrote: »

Hey, I've just finished playing your quest and thought it was very well done, with good attention to detail. I enjoyed reading through all the dialogue and different interactables. I'm looking forward to playing the second when it's complete to see what happens next!

If you get a chance, I'd appreciate it if you could take a look at either one of my quests in the sig. Thank you.

I am glad you enjoyed it.

I will be unable to run through yours tonight, but I will return the favor in the next couple of days.

yipykaye · June 2013

Thanks for the feedback on my quests.

I played the first part of your today. I can see you spent alot of time on this as there were so many details and reading involved. I can see why now you asked for more dialog from interacting on my quest line. However and this is a totally personal thing I felt like by the end there was too much reading and interaction for what I needed to complete quest. And with 3-4 options in responses I didn't know if I needed to carefully choose or just pick one and move on.

As far as objects go I noticed the rug on the stairs before the Lab was floating a little and was half way up my leg. Not a biggy just looked odd at first.

The encounters didnt seem to make sense early on as such a wide variety. The experiment tags on them was my clue as to why everything felt different. I thought that it felt a bit full on with encounters so quickly would have enjoyed getting to the house first and then after finding the town over run. Personal thing though. I did however feel some of the encounters felt too big for the room.
I did this on my cleric and i think my CW would have struggled to dodge enough of the attacks to survive with all the furniture.

Overall a pretty good quest just not my cup of tea. I have read responses that loved the detail. So keep up the good work.

Will trade for reviews on The Secret to Paradise: Part 1 - Paradise Lost!

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