For Review: In The Bandit Business

zwallace · May 2013

This is part one of the 'A Little Unfriendly Competition' campaign.

The merchants of Neverwinter are being plagued by bandit attacks. Convoys entering or leaving the city are being ransacked and warehouses are being raided. Is this just random vandalism or is there a more sinister force behind this?

Travel to Bleakwood Village and uncover a wicked plot against the Merchant's Guild.

Foundry Code: NW-DK7SPLPRP
Version: 1.4
Length: 15 to 20 min
Level: 1-60
Combat: Solo and end may be difficult depending on class/level, bring a friend!
Tags: #Story, #Combat, #Balanced

Screenshots

vold316 · May 2013

Added to my "to review" list. Please review mine, the short code is in my signature.

zwallace · May 2013

I played your quest with a level 19 Guardian. I brought a cleric companion and never had to use a potion. I feel like without a healer some of the boss fights would have been extremely difficult.

I also noticed some spelling mistakes, other than the orcs, goblins, and pirates. I liked the dialog and your use of OOC emotes.

The storyline was very good. I really enjoyed how much there was to do in the dungeon. The puzzles and traps were a lot of fun.

Keep up the good work. Can't wait for the next installment!

blergnur · May 2013

I enjoyed this! I thought your story was good and made me want to know more. I also thought your dungeons were well done and the layout made sense. Not a lot of needless killing or rooms after rooms of trash.

About the only thing I would consider adding would be a quick exit once your done, so you don't have to run back out through an empty dungeon. This can break story for some though, so I like to work it in with finding a scroll that can return you on a table after all the rest of it is complete.

Check out mine, and please give me some feedback as well.

NW-DHRG9C27M Save Stoutbeard Brewery!

zwallace · May 2013

Thanks! I will definitely add a hallway and door leading from the end room to Neverwinter.

I'll play your quest tomorrow and post a review.

Also, roughly how long did it take you to complete? I am trying to get this one to be between 15 - 20 because it's just the intro/hook to the campaign. Next quest will be longer.

vold316 · May 2013

After than i killed the bandit's and went back to Protector's Enclave, the quest disappeared from my quest log, this is a known bug which is fixed reloging, but then when i reloged the login server went down. :P
I will restart your quest tomorrow, but from what i could see it was very well done, i will probably give you 4 stars, because that's probably how I would rate it if it was finished (needs more details in the cave, and some other stuff that i will post after than i completely review it). The idea of spawning the spiders in the brushes is great, i really liked it!

Btw, thanks for your review on my quest, as I said, i will review yours as soon as I login.

ovaltine74 · May 2013

Alright, I'll do it, but I had better get a review from you as well.

zwallace · May 2013

Blergnur, I played through Save Stoutbeard Brewery and really enjoyed it. I did it with a level 20 Guardian w/ a cleric companion, never needed to use a potion.

Your placement of the respawn campfire was awesome! Definitely gave me some ideas.

There was a little too much combat after killing the first boss, specifically too many enforcers. But I am more of a story guy, so it might just be me.

The dialog was great, you have done the best job with drunk dialog that I have seen yet.

Overall, keep up the great work. I am looking forward to a possible part 2 or any other quest you might make.

Ovaltine, I will be away for a day or two, but after that I will definitely review your quest. Haven't not been good on trading reviews yet!

kamaliicious · May 2013

In the first cave room, the connection to the small caves tile has some space around it where Cryptic left off textures for things. Their fault but you can fix with some small rocks.
The hideout seemed empty except for two rooms, so I'm guessing not fully decorated yet. The two decorated rooms looked good.
The encounters were labelled Nasher Rebels. If they are bandits they can be named as such.
I too ran into the quest dropping when returning to PE, logged out and back in and it came back up. Cryptic's fault.

Based on the story, this works best for lower level characters from a RP perspective. It competently tells the story it's trying to tell. Therefore I gave it 4 stars: 3.5 rounding up based on expectation of further detailing the cave and fixing the encounter labels (this is v 1.2, so I figure you will continue to update based on people's feedback). There weren't any logical errors in it and the details that commonly get missed like customizing interaction text, animations, and 'go to next map' were all taken care of. 500 AD tip.

labmouse42 · May 2013

I have reviewed yours. If you could return the favor I would appreciate it.
The info is in my sig file.

When I accepted the quest there was no sparkle trail. I dig the lack of sparkle in the adventure, but it would be handy to have in the start zone.

I like how you did the dialogue with the OOC notes. Very clear and easy to follow.

Can you give me extra dialogue options? Take the "Mass Effect" theory with 1 good trail, one average trail and one evil one? Some people just like to reply with different stuff. All 3 responses can go to the same end but the choice of 'what you say' makes roleplayers have more fun.

I did the ring of trees around the campire when your in Bleakwood. The smoke around the ruined building is a very nice touch.

I liked the names to the NPCs in the inn. Its not a blanket 'villager'. Its a simple thing but went a long way.

I like how you made 2 bleakwood maps. That was a good way to introduce the mobs.

The trap in the bandit hideout was pretty easy to spot. The pressure plate did not work to well with the dirt floor

I like how you had rooms that were not the right way. I love adventures that are not linear paths.

I don't know if it was intended this way, but you could aggro some mobs in your rooms and not others -- this was because you spaced out hte mobs in the encounter.

After I beat the last encounter give me a shortcut back to the entrance. Its a trick from skyrim that I really like.

zwallace · May 2013

I am impressed with the Foundry community! I am loving all of the constructive feedback. I am definitely taking all of this into consideration and when my "real life" gives me a couple days to work on the quest again I plan on adding more decorations to the bandit cave and also adding a shortcut. I also plan on giving the bandits an actual group name, instead of Nasher Rebels.

As for what labmouse said about the dialog. I might not change it in this quest, but I will definitely use that technique in part 2, which I am storyboarding with my girlfriend tonight. I will review yours probably this weekend, I am really busy with work this week.

zwallace · May 2013

Version 1.3:

- fixed some bugs with floating rocks and other details
- added more decorations to the dungeon
- added more dialog in Bleakwood
- added an escape route to Neverwinter at the end of the dungeon, no more running back through!

blergnur · May 2013

zwallace wrote: »

Thanks! I will definitely add a hallway and door leading from the end room to Neverwinter.

I'll play your quest tomorrow and post a review.

Also, roughly how long did it take you to complete? I am trying to get this one to be between 15 - 20 because it's just the intro/hook to the campaign. Next quest will be longer.

I think it took me roughly 20-25 minutes, but I'm a GF so I kill a little slower than some, and I didn't rush, read the texts and all that. So your probably spot on for time.

Thanks for your review of Stoutbeard! I hope to continue that story line into a campaign, assuming I get time to work on it.. may be a long while.

zwallace · May 2013

I played your quest labmouse. The humor was good and I laughed quite a bit. The inn was very nicely decorated and I really enjoyed all of the named NPCs that had a ton of flavor text.

The outdoor village area could use a little more decoration to make it really come alive. It seemed very empty.

Also, one thing that was kind of confusing in the inn was the basement ladder, the interact text was a little confusing. The maze was fun, though! I got beat up by the traps.

Overall, good job and I will play your next quest.

Ovaltine! Wow...that quest was something else. The dialog was superb and I loved the environments. There are a few spellings errors, but that's to be expected with so much dialog. I feel bad for not taking note of the ones that I noticed because it will be hard to find them. Let me know when part 2 comes out!

zwallace · May 2013

If you plan on heading to the cave outside of Bleakwood Village you'd better watch out for traps and bring your torch!

Version 1.4:

- added dynamic lighting to the end dungeon
- added more traps.

For Review: In The Bandit Business

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