A unknown portal has manifested somewhere and you have been chosen to find who or what is behind it.
Unnerving Portal: NW-DMTFHPK4D
1. Solo oriented quest
2. Heavily combat based
3. Average is around 15 mins
My first quest and would really appreciate some reviews.
Here's a SS from one of the areas
Comments
- Kinda strange to make me walk through all that empty hallspace
- Millan: "they have sense a new portal emerged somewhere in a arctic area" -> "they have sensed a new portal emerging somewhere in an arctic area"
- Millan: "venture to the cave that dwells this portal" needs rewording
- Oh, that fancy thing in the middle of the big room isn't the portal? Because it sure looks like that's the case initially.
- The village is placed on the map 'in' neverwinter, which doesn't really match the arctic description
- I like that the natives are not (immediately) hostile
- It's not even remotely obvious how to get up to where the portal cave is. The glowy line is no help (I know you have no control over this) - maybe move it somewhere easier to spot? (Later: I found the 'stairs')
- Local native: "a sign from our ancesters" -> "sign from our ancestors"
- Dialog in general needs work. Ex: on the next entry there's:
Seems an unnecessary break in the sentence, let alone in the paragraph.
- Ascending this pillar is... boring. There's nothing going on here except the boss fight at the top. And then I have to /descend/ the pillar. Descent is hard because a number of the rocks don't line up for easy drop-down; I took falling damage a number of times.
- The shaman doesn't really explain why everyone's suddenly hostile. Is it because I'm intruding, or because whatever the portal's doing is making them that way?
- I defeated another guardian - it tells me to reach the portal but I thought I was already there? There are 5 things with the default "fx-lightning portal 1" label here. They do nothing when I interact with them.
- An indicator of how far along I am in the waves of enemies coming out of the portal would be handy. E.g. objective names like "Push back invaders (wave 3/5)"
- Nice FX work on the mindflayer boss fight!
- Millan: "I truelly thank you" -> "I truly thank you"
My foundry campaign "In Thrall to the God of Rage":
Crumorn the Spiked: NW-DCDX6KMED
Nerisatis the Cold: NW-DNIEWE95D
What it is
After being instructed by the head of a secret council, the player embarks on an adventure into the arctic regions. The quest is a standard dungeon crawl with medium combat that is very manageable by a solo player. The mobs are remarkably melee-friendly.
What I liked
The cave design is well done and atmospheric, and I enjoyed the type of monsters chosen. There were interesting light effects that I found mesmerizing. The whole theme appealed.
What could be improved
The beginning of the quest is both confusing (quest text should state which sever entrance) and there is too much pointless running around at the start. Arriving in the village seemed initially disconnected; perhaps the player could speak to one of the natives upon arriving? The narrow passage with the long row of unavoidable traps could do without the traps since the only purpose is to eat up a potion.
All in all
A standard dungeon/cave crawl with a fairly standard story, but the atmospheric scenery and well-chosen props of the main location as well as the bite-sized, non-frustrating enemy groups make for an enjoyable, light, combat-centric adventure.
(Name: Unnerving Portal, NW-DMTFHPK4D)
I did some changes, it's now eligible for the daily.