Description: The informally self-labeled Task Force Impromptu is now effectively distanced from any help within the Deadzone. With no way out for the next decade, only one mission remains: finding Xausea, the homeworld whence the Omnitabula was made. There lies a potential wealth of knowledge the equal of the Preserver Archives, and a small hope of a way home.
But what will be found within the Deadzone will only begin to reveal the true nature of what is yet to come...
Summary: This is an outstanding mission and great follow up to the previous mission in the series. The map designs are excellent; the battles are a good range of tough but fun and the story dialogue is very well written. I found very few spelling or grammatical issues. There are a few response button issues and one or two empty dialogue boxes but those are easily cleaned up. I would highly recommend this mission to other players who like a riveting story combined with excellent map designs and fun battles. You will enjoy this mission.
One point I wanted to address is the placement of objectives and combat locations. I always play on high detail so I can enjoy the fullness of the features of the maps. If you are not currently using high detail when you test your maps I highly recommend it. This gives you the ability to see when plants may be in the way of an NPC or located right on top of an enemy spawn point. Some plants are relatively innocuous to the game play but others can interfere or even lock a player or enemy in place. Trees or some of the pod plants frequently used by the map designers are a good example of this. Players who play on low or medium detail wont mind it either as it generally will not affect their play since they cannot see the plants anyway.
Below are a couple of things I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.
Mission Description: This is a good detailed description. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this description.
Grant Mission Dialogue: The grant and follow on dialogue are well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted only one item to consider changing:
-Consider moving the previous mission summary up to the second selection from the top vice the bottom.
Mission Task: The initial mission task is well written. I noted no spelling errors with this task.
Mission Entry Prompt: The entry prompt dialogue is well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue.
MAPS: The Deadzone (Deadzone): This is a good map design with tough but fun battles and well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
Unexpected System (Deadzone): This is a good map design with well written story dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-The initial dialogue; consider changing "the size of the pocked suggest that" to read "the size of the pocket suggest that".
On the Surface (Un-named Planet): This is a good map design with simple optional combat and well written story dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-The initial dialogue; consider changing "considering the dense forrest surrounding it" to read "considering the dense forest surrounding it".
-The dialogue with Ae'ela; a sentence starts with "It c" and that is it. Consider either finishing the sentence or removing it from the dialogue.
The Ancient Doorway (Eosmyria): This is a good map design with tough but not impossible combat and well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Be mindful of high detail objects that may not show up in the editor if you are reviewing the maps on low detail. It can affect the players experience during the mission when suddenly there is a plant in the way of them talking to an NPC or a battle.
Guardian (The Ancient Temple - Interior): This is an excellent map design with fun optional combat and well written story dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-In the West Chamber dialogue that follows the response button "Let's get this over with" is a blank dialogue with "Continue" for the response button. Consider removing the blank dialogue link following that response button.
-Since the combat is optional based on solving a puzzle to determine the console you access consider adding either a "Skip puzzle" button to the initial dialogue for both the East and West rooms. You could design it so if the player selects that button the dialogue tells them which console to activate, i.e. North, South, East or West.
-Following the "May I inquire on some matters regarding yourself" button the dialogue has four buttons. One is "Were you built by the Xauseans" and the other three are "Continue". Consider either removing those buttons labeled "Continue" or change to an appropriate response with an end to the dialogue or continuation of the dialogue. I am not sure if the problem also exists following the button "I have some questions that could use answers". Check both trees of dialogue.
Escape Part 1 (The Secret Tunnel): This is a great map design with fun, if not over done combat and well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Consider reducing the number of spiders and webs the player has to work through. Additionally consider changing the animation for the "Cut through web" tasks to kneeling or other appropriate animation.
Escape Part 2 (Eosmyria - Unknown Location): This is an excellent map design with tough but fun combat and well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Consider reviewing the placement of the objective point "Reach the Clearing". This location is actually on the side of a hill and there are lots of high detail plants in the way. This causes the player to fight during the "Survive" objective against enemy coming from a cliff above the hillside as well as over a hill top and with high detail plants in the way. The high detail plants should enhance the play not detract from it. There is actually a clearing on the map to the south, south east of the current location that would probably work better.
Threshold (Deadzone Solar System): This is an excellent map design with fun battles and very well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
"To Bodly Go " (Destination - Unknown): This is a good map design with well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
End Report
Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. You did a great job developing this mission and the series so far. I look forward to playing/reviewing more of your work in the future.
Brian
Description: Everything comes together in this explosive conclusion of the Omnitabula trilogy. Discover the dark secret of the Xausean homeworld, achieve greater understanding of the nature of Enigma, and find the unexpected.
Description: Everything comes together in this explosive conclusion of the Omnitabula trilogy. Discover the dark secret of the Xausean homeworld, achieve greater understanding of the nature of Enigma, and find the unexpected.
Summary: This mission is a great one and well worth the time to play. The map designs are outstanding throughout, the battles are tough but fun and your story dialogue is excellent. This is a fine addition to the series. I would highly recommend this mission, as well as the entire series, to all players. You will enjoy them from start to finish.
Below are a couple of things I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.
Mission Description: This is a good description. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this description.
Grant Mission Dialogue: This is a good grant dialogue. I like the different options you give the player to use prior to continuing the mission.
Mission Task: This is a good initial task. I noted no spelling errors with this task.
Mission Entry Prompt: This is a good use of the prompt. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue.
MAPS:
The Unexpected [Xausea System]: This is a great map design with well written story dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-The post Head to the nebula dialogue; consider changing "confirmed, it is a subspace tear" to read "Confirmed, it is a subspace tear".
-Consider changing "I recommend every ship times so that we are all going at once" to read "I recommend that all ships time it so we are all engaging at once".
-Prior to the Engage Warp Drive task you place a "Move to warp location" task. When I engaged Warp Drive the warp effect was at least 13 to 15 KM away from me. If you add that task you can guarantee the player will be in the right spot when the effect is shown.
-The post Scan Area dialogue; consider changing "the hostile vessels do not notice" to read "the hostile vessels did not notice".
Xausea [Oceanic City]: This is a great map design that is well executed with excellent story dialogue. I liked the "Skip Puzzle" options in your dialogue. I know there are players who like them but I do not always care to complete them in order to play, so it is appreciated. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
The Central Chamber [Xausea]: This is a fantastic map design that is well executed with excellent story dialogue. Again, I liked the "Skip Puzzle" options in your dialogue.
Beyond Time or Place [Unknown]: This is another fantastic map design with well executed story dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Consider changing the response button "It's as if this was an illusion was made for our benefit" to read "It's as if this was an illusion made for our benefit".
Gauntlet Part 1 [Xausea]: This is a fantastic map design with challenging but fun battles and well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
Gauntlet Part 2 [Xausea System]: This is a great map design with challenging but fun battles and well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-The intercept the Juggernaut task seems to be a little too large. I had to fly out of it and come back in to get it to work. Consider making it smaller.
The Juggernaut [Milky Way - Deadzone]: This is a good map design with tough but fun battles and excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-The Get back into position task seems to be a little too large. I had to fly out of it and come back in to get it to work. Consider making it smaller.
Remembrances Part 1 [Utopia Planitia]: This is a good map design with well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
Remembrances Part 2 [Risa]: This is a good map design with well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-The Final words buttons need to be labeled with each NPC name the player is talking to. It looks odd when then are right next to each other and two buttons appear that say "Final words".
End Report
Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. You did a great job developing this mission and series. I look forward to playing/reviewing more of your work in the future.
Brian
I guess you liked it. For your question, it depends...
If you mean "do more" as in another mission, then good news! "Cyber" is now playable.
If you mean "do more" as in another three parter like Omnitabula? Well... two conditions for me to even attempt another one like it.
1) I would have to come up with a story that is richer than Omnitabula. Not necessarily more epic in scope, just richer in things like character development. Something that can just be a great experience through and through.
2) I'd rather such a project be a collaborative effort.
Comments
Federation Mission - The Omnitabula - Threshold
Author: starfarertheta
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HIKR5YADT
Report Start
Summary: This is an outstanding mission and great follow up to the previous mission in the series. The map designs are excellent; the battles are a good range of tough but fun and the story dialogue is very well written. I found very few spelling or grammatical issues. There are a few response button issues and one or two empty dialogue boxes but those are easily cleaned up. I would highly recommend this mission to other players who like a riveting story combined with excellent map designs and fun battles. You will enjoy this mission.
One point I wanted to address is the placement of objectives and combat locations. I always play on high detail so I can enjoy the fullness of the features of the maps. If you are not currently using high detail when you test your maps I highly recommend it. This gives you the ability to see when plants may be in the way of an NPC or located right on top of an enemy spawn point. Some plants are relatively innocuous to the game play but others can interfere or even lock a player or enemy in place. Trees or some of the pod plants frequently used by the map designers are a good example of this. Players who play on low or medium detail wont mind it either as it generally will not affect their play since they cannot see the plants anyway.
Below are a couple of things I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.
Mission Description: This is a good detailed description. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this description.
Grant Mission Dialogue: The grant and follow on dialogue are well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted only one item to consider changing:
-Consider moving the previous mission summary up to the second selection from the top vice the bottom.
Mission Task: The initial mission task is well written. I noted no spelling errors with this task.
Mission Entry Prompt: The entry prompt dialogue is well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue.
MAPS:
The Deadzone (Deadzone): This is a good map design with tough but fun battles and well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
Unexpected System (Deadzone): This is a good map design with well written story dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-The initial dialogue; consider changing "the size of the pocked suggest that" to read "the size of the pocket suggest that".
On the Surface (Un-named Planet): This is a good map design with simple optional combat and well written story dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-The initial dialogue; consider changing "considering the dense forrest surrounding it" to read "considering the dense forest surrounding it".
-The dialogue with Ae'ela; a sentence starts with "It c" and that is it. Consider either finishing the sentence or removing it from the dialogue.
The Ancient Doorway (Eosmyria): This is a good map design with tough but not impossible combat and well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Be mindful of high detail objects that may not show up in the editor if you are reviewing the maps on low detail. It can affect the players experience during the mission when suddenly there is a plant in the way of them talking to an NPC or a battle.
Guardian (The Ancient Temple - Interior): This is an excellent map design with fun optional combat and well written story dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-In the West Chamber dialogue that follows the response button "Let's get this over with" is a blank dialogue with "Continue" for the response button. Consider removing the blank dialogue link following that response button.
-Since the combat is optional based on solving a puzzle to determine the console you access consider adding either a "Skip puzzle" button to the initial dialogue for both the East and West rooms. You could design it so if the player selects that button the dialogue tells them which console to activate, i.e. North, South, East or West.
-Following the "May I inquire on some matters regarding yourself" button the dialogue has four buttons. One is "Were you built by the Xauseans" and the other three are "Continue". Consider either removing those buttons labeled "Continue" or change to an appropriate response with an end to the dialogue or continuation of the dialogue. I am not sure if the problem also exists following the button "I have some questions that could use answers". Check both trees of dialogue.
Escape Part 1 (The Secret Tunnel): This is a great map design with fun, if not over done combat and well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Consider reducing the number of spiders and webs the player has to work through. Additionally consider changing the animation for the "Cut through web" tasks to kneeling or other appropriate animation.
Escape Part 2 (Eosmyria - Unknown Location): This is an excellent map design with tough but fun combat and well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Consider reviewing the placement of the objective point "Reach the Clearing". This location is actually on the side of a hill and there are lots of high detail plants in the way. This causes the player to fight during the "Survive" objective against enemy coming from a cliff above the hillside as well as over a hill top and with high detail plants in the way. The high detail plants should enhance the play not detract from it. There is actually a clearing on the map to the south, south east of the current location that would probably work better.
Threshold (Deadzone Solar System): This is an excellent map design with fun battles and very well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
"To Bodly Go " (Destination - Unknown): This is a good map design with well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
End Report
Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. You did a great job developing this mission and the series so far. I look forward to playing/reviewing more of your work in the future.
Brian
This critique report also filed 06/12/2015 on forum posting for: In depth mission reports upon request. The specific report in that posting can also be viewed here: Mission Critique Report - The Omnitabula - Threshold.
Omnitabula: Beyond
ID: ST-HI9DF9DXR
Author: starfarertheta
Faction: Starfleet
Estimated Length: 60 - 90 minutes.
Level Requirement: 51+
Door: Risa
Description:
Everything comes together in this explosive conclusion of the Omnitabula trilogy. Discover the dark secret of the Xausean homeworld, achieve greater understanding of the nature of Enigma, and find the unexpected.
This mission is currently under the review tab.
Federation Mission - Omnitabula: Beyond
Author: starfarertheta
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HI9DF9DXR
Report Start
Summary: This mission is a great one and well worth the time to play. The map designs are outstanding throughout, the battles are tough but fun and your story dialogue is excellent. This is a fine addition to the series. I would highly recommend this mission, as well as the entire series, to all players. You will enjoy them from start to finish.
Below are a couple of things I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.
Mission Description: This is a good description. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this description.
Grant Mission Dialogue: This is a good grant dialogue. I like the different options you give the player to use prior to continuing the mission.
Mission Task: This is a good initial task. I noted no spelling errors with this task.
Mission Entry Prompt: This is a good use of the prompt. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue.
MAPS:
The Unexpected [Xausea System]: This is a great map design with well written story dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-The post Head to the nebula dialogue; consider changing "confirmed, it is a subspace tear" to read "Confirmed, it is a subspace tear".
-Consider changing "I recommend every ship times so that we are all going at once" to read "I recommend that all ships time it so we are all engaging at once".
-Prior to the Engage Warp Drive task you place a "Move to warp location" task. When I engaged Warp Drive the warp effect was at least 13 to 15 KM away from me. If you add that task you can guarantee the player will be in the right spot when the effect is shown.
-The post Scan Area dialogue; consider changing "the hostile vessels do not notice" to read "the hostile vessels did not notice".
Xausea [Oceanic City]: This is a great map design that is well executed with excellent story dialogue. I liked the "Skip Puzzle" options in your dialogue. I know there are players who like them but I do not always care to complete them in order to play, so it is appreciated. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
The Central Chamber [Xausea]: This is a fantastic map design that is well executed with excellent story dialogue. Again, I liked the "Skip Puzzle" options in your dialogue.
Beyond Time or Place [Unknown]: This is another fantastic map design with well executed story dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Consider changing the response button "It's as if this was an illusion was made for our benefit" to read "It's as if this was an illusion made for our benefit".
Gauntlet Part 1 [Xausea]: This is a fantastic map design with challenging but fun battles and well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
Gauntlet Part 2 [Xausea System]: This is a great map design with challenging but fun battles and well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-The intercept the Juggernaut task seems to be a little too large. I had to fly out of it and come back in to get it to work. Consider making it smaller.
The Juggernaut [Milky Way - Deadzone]: This is a good map design with tough but fun battles and excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-The Get back into position task seems to be a little too large. I had to fly out of it and come back in to get it to work. Consider making it smaller.
Remembrances Part 1 [Utopia Planitia]: This is a good map design with well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.
Remembrances Part 2 [Risa]: This is a good map design with well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-The Final words buttons need to be labeled with each NPC name the player is talking to. It looks odd when then are right next to each other and two buttons appear that say "Final words".
End Report
Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. You did a great job developing this mission and series. I look forward to playing/reviewing more of your work in the future.
Brian
This critique report also filed 12/13/2015 on forum posting for: In depth mission reports upon request.
I guess you liked it.
If you mean "do more" as in another mission, then good news! "Cyber" is now playable.
If you mean "do more" as in another three parter like Omnitabula? Well... two conditions for me to even attempt another one like it.
1) I would have to come up with a story that is richer than Omnitabula. Not necessarily more epic in scope, just richer in things like character development. Something that can just be a great experience through and through.
2) I'd rather such a project be a collaborative effort.
Edit: Updated post.