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Housewife rewrites Harry Potter to be more Christian
moonshadowdark
Member Posts: 1,899 Arc User
HEY! Do you like the Harry Potter series but wish it had traditional moral values and lessons? Well, you are in luck, because a woman named Grace Ann aka "proudhousewife" on Fanfiction.Net has taken it upon herself to write a Christian themed version of Harry Potter.
WHAT? Think I'm lying? Think I'm making it up for attention? Think I value the opinions and respect of a bunch of random people on the internet who I will never meet in real life?
Well, you're right on the last one, but behold: Hogwarts School of Prayer and Miracles!
This thing is already on it's seventh or eighth chapter and has over 2000+ reviews, mostly God jokes and troll smack.
Give a peruse. It's so badly written. It's like that "Jesus, Man" viral video that circulated the internet a few months ago. She changes Dumbledore into a Reverend (who is married and straight) and Hermione is his daughter (I assume she thought the Grangers were Jewish because they were dentists.) and Hagrid gets into a hilariously one sided debate with Petunia about Evolution vs. Creationism.
Oh, Fanfiction.Net. What will you give us next?
WHAT? Think I'm lying? Think I'm making it up for attention? Think I value the opinions and respect of a bunch of random people on the internet who I will never meet in real life?
Well, you're right on the last one, but behold: Hogwarts School of Prayer and Miracles!
This thing is already on it's seventh or eighth chapter and has over 2000+ reviews, mostly God jokes and troll smack.
Give a peruse. It's so badly written. It's like that "Jesus, Man" viral video that circulated the internet a few months ago. She changes Dumbledore into a Reverend (who is married and straight) and Hermione is his daughter (I assume she thought the Grangers were Jewish because they were dentists.) and Hagrid gets into a hilariously one sided debate with Petunia about Evolution vs. Creationism.
Oh, Fanfiction.Net. What will you give us next?
"A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. LLAP"
-Leonard Nimoy, RIP
-Leonard Nimoy, RIP
Post edited by moonshadowdark on
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Comments
At least I think it is; might fall under Poe's Law.
Also, as far as I can remember JK Rowling is a Christian and the books are filled with vaguely Christian themes anyway.
Norway and Yeager dammit... I still want my Typhoon and Jupiter though.
JJ Trek The Kelvin Timeline is just Trek and it's fully canon... get over it. But I still prefer TAR.
#TASforSTO
'...I can tell you that we're not in the military and that we intend no harm to the whales.' Kirk: The Voyage Home
'Starfleet is not a military organisation. Its purpose is exploration.' Picard: Peak Performance
'This is clearly a military operation. Is that what we are now? Because I thought we were explorers!' Scotty: Into Darkness
'...The Federation. Starfleet. We're not a military agency.' Scotty: Beyond
'I'm not a soldier anymore. I'm an engineer.' Miles O'Brien: Empok Nor
'...Starfleet could use you... It's a peacekeeping and humanitarian armada...' Admiral Pike: Star Trek
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Nope. It's 100% "legit".
I wonder if she'll take requests. I've always wanted to read Macbeth where the three witches are Avon ladies.
-Leonard Nimoy, RIP
Yeah, that's definitely a trollfic.
It reads like it was written by someone whose idea of Christianity comes from Chick Tracts and Westboro Baptist Church.
In other words...
It's written by a housewife with good Christian values.
What, did you expect her writings to be as great as the LC crew? Our stuff is pure genius!
*Redshirt walks in*
Ensign Ricky: Your character is a rip off of a B list actor, your writing prompts all sound like Voyager scripts and your favorite author on this board writes about a crappy six foot tall TRIBBLE robot who breaks the fourth wall too much to be funny anymore.
..........
Okay, insulting Captain Lowe is one thing. Accusing my LC's of being Voyager worthy is another. But never evr ever ever ever NEVER insult Worffan's Nemesis Unit Three.
Ensign Ricky: Why?
*Nemesis Unit Three appears behind Ricky and snaps his neck in one fluid motion.*
That's why.
-Leonard Nimoy, RIP
But I can ALWAYS be certain of this: You NEVER fail to make me laugh.
Have this complementary interwebz. :P
However;
:P
Anyway, yeah, I find it hard to believe that fic is serious. I just can't...
No one can be that naive. Not even Kes.
Trials of Blood and Fire
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Wonder what she changed the Christmas references to.
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system Lord Baal is dead
I was serious about my prompts. "Cult" just sounds like a Berman original.
-Leonard Nimoy, RIP
Eh, the problem with Voyager wasn't the premises, it was the execution.
Some of the premises were pretty good. "Scorpion" is the perfect example of a great premise executed with epic fail.
I'm sorry. I respect other people's religious beliefs, but that's kinda taking it a bit far. REWRITING a story to make it conform to someone's beliefs? I'd hate to see what would happen to the classic The Land Before Time.
system Lord Baal is dead
*facepalm* Not subjecting myself to the mental torture required to determine if this is the real thing or a trollfic on the level of My Immortal. I will say this, though: Speaking as a reasonably devout Methodist, folks like that drive me absolutely nuts.
— Sabaton, "Great War"
Check out https://unitedfederationofpla.net/s/
Um, "My Immortal" was genuine.
The author actually has a number of very creepy videos of herself and her friend on YouTube if you know where to look.
(and there goeth thy faith in humanity...)
Either way it was TRIBBLE in and of itself, just like this ridiculous thing.
— Sabaton, "Great War"
Check out https://unitedfederationofpla.net/s/
But it was funny in its crappiness.
I loved the TRIBBLE chapter, where someone TRIBBLE the author's account and killed Enoby horribly. That was fun.
As a Christian, I would point out that IF this thing is real--and I do have my doubts--this woman, by being so narrow-minded, missed out on what are actually some very Christian-compatible values in the Harry Potter books, culmination with
SPOILER ALERT...
An act of self-sacrifice that can aptly be described by the famous verse John 15:13: "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." Followed by resurrection from death NOT by magic--which it is made abundantly clear is not a thing one ought to seek after--but by means left unexplained.
So while certainly not "Bible-thumping," IMO it takes a very rigid mind to miss that, and other things about the Harry Potter series that I would not at all mind my hypothetical kids reading.
How she does not have a conniption fit about C.S. Lewis I have no idea.
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I think it's a trollfic, gulberat.
And while I have issues with the HP series, they center primarily around worldbuilding and characters, not around the moral messages, which I (socialist atheist liberal that I am) find generally sensible despite the obviously Catholic overtones of the series.
Nothing wrong with religion as long as it's not being shoved in your face, after all.
The trollfic, however, shoves religion in the reader's face with a side of hypocrisy and arrogance, and seems more than a little snide in doing so; thus, I suspect that it is a trollfic. A genuine believer would've made subtle overtones like Rowling.
Not to my knowledge.