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Stargate Hail Ba'al Rambling

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  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    rattler2 wrote: »
    We also intercepted some transmissions. They are fanatics... and the name Kane kept coming up.

    Oh, WONDERFUL.

    First Prime Teal'c, engage the enemy. I need to take this call--it's Sovereign Ba'al.

    Hail Ba'al!
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,969 Community Moderator
    edited June 2014
    *Orders the Lexington back to a starbase for repairs*
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    rattler2 wrote: »
    *Orders the Lexington back to a starbase for repairs*

    Get back out here fast with as much backup as you can--if it's the Brotherhood, we need to get that Tiberium as fast as possible.

    Seriously. Not only are Star Trek and Stargate real now, but C&C is...

    Hail Ba'al!
  • kuntelkuntel Member Posts: 16,484 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    worffan101 wrote: »
    Get back out here fast with as much backup as you can--if it's the Brotherhood, we need to get that Tiberium as fast as possible.

    Seriously. Not only are Star Trek and Stargate real now, but C&C is...

    Hail Ba'al!

    *Walks onto bridge.*

    I leave for ten damn seconds and the entire Grand Regime is at risk!?

    By Ba'al, this is bad!

    *Grabs comms officer*

    Relay a command to the Headmaster of the League of Assassin's, tell him to order the stealth fleet here! And bring the Asgard's!
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    kuntel wrote: »
    *Walks onto bridge.*

    I leave for ten damn seconds and the entire Grand Regime is at risk!?

    By Ba'al, this is bad!

    *Grabs comms officer*

    Relay a command to the Headmaster of the League of Assassin's, tell him to order the stealth fleet here! And bring the Asgard's!

    Ah, Darth Kuntel! Just the man I needed.

    Your target is Kane, head of the Brotherhood of Nod. Your job is to assassinate him and destroy his network, and fast.

    Hail Ba'al!

    P.S. If we survive this, I'm giving you a salary bump...
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,969 Community Moderator
    edited June 2014
    Wish I could help, but the Lexington was damaged... and Starfleet isn't familiar with these weapons that were used against us. We're taking a more cautious approach. However, I can still accompany you as a representative of Starfleet. Also... I'm pretty skilled with a Phaser Rifle.
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    rattler2 wrote: »
    Wish I could help, but the Lexington was damaged... and Starfleet isn't familiar with these weapons that were used against us. We're taking a more cautious approach. However, I can still accompany you as a representative of Starfleet. Also... I'm pretty skilled with a Phaser Rifle.

    Good. We've got the Brotherhood fleet contained for the moment, we're going to try a ground offensive to give Darth Kuntel a shot at their leader in the confusion.

    Bring as many MACO troops as you can.

    Hail Ba'al!
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,969 Community Moderator
    edited June 2014
    *Checks power cell in an Elite Fleet Split Beam Rifle*
    Saddle up... lock and load.
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
  • kuntelkuntel Member Posts: 16,484 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    worffan101 wrote: »
    Ah, Darth Kuntel! Just the man I needed.

    Your target is Kane, head of the Brotherhood of Nod. Your job is to assassinate him and destroy his network, and fast.

    Hail Ba'al!

    P.S. If we survive this, I'm giving you a salary bump...

    *Walk off bridge.*

    I'm going to need to call in a lot of connection. Ooh, gonna try to do simultaneously...

    Hail Ba'al! May he protect us!

    P.S. YES!
  • kuntelkuntel Member Posts: 16,484 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    worffan101 wrote: »
    Good. We've got the Brotherhood fleet contained for the moment, we're going to try a ground offensive to give Darth Kuntel a shot at their leader in the confusion.

    Bring as many MACO troops as you can.

    Hail Ba'al!

    *A Tel'Tac flys by the bridge windows. It disappears. A messade comes in*

    The network is dead. Time to kill the head! I'm going for the main ship, direct all firepower off of that flag!
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    kuntel wrote: »
    *A Tel'Tac flys by the bridge windows. It disappears. A messade comes in*

    The network is dead. Time to kill the head! I'm going for the main ship, direct all firepower off of that flag!

    Change of plans, support Darth Kuntel with everything we've got!

    FOR THE GLORIOUS REGIME AND MY FREE DENTAL INSURANCE!!!!!!! AND MY TOTALLY-NOT-EVIL-AT-ALL GOATEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Hail Ba'al!
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,969 Community Moderator
    edited June 2014
    You guys need a new battle cry...
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
  • kuntelkuntel Member Posts: 16,484 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    worffan101 wrote: »
    Change of plans, support Darth Kuntel with everything we've got!

    FOR THE GLORIOUS REGIME AND MY FREE DENTAL INSURANCE!!!!!!! AND MY TOTALLY-NOT-EVIL-AT-ALL GOATEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Hail Ba'al!

    *The Tel'tac flies over and the rings seem to fly through the bridge. The glass of it breaks and bodies fly out. The fleet starts to break from lack of direction. The Tel'tac returns*

    *Walks on bridge, carrying a body. Throws it infront of worffan.*

    My Tel'tac will need a new set of rings, Grand Vizier. But the mission is done... I didn't know if you wanted his head or not so...

    Hail Ba'al!
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,969 Community Moderator
    edited June 2014
    I think you're gonna have to pay for the repairs...
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    rattler2 wrote: »
    You guys need a new battle cry...
    Yeah, it's on my list.
    kuntel wrote: »
    *The Tel'tac flies over and the rings seem to fly through the bridge. The glass of it breaks and bodies fly out. The fleet starts to break from lack of direction. The Tel'tac returns*

    *Walks on bridge, carrying a body. Throws it infront of worffan.*

    My Tel'tac will need a new set of rings, Grand Vizier. But the mission is done... I didn't know if you wanted his head or not so...

    Hail Ba'al!
    You're promoted. Have a new pleasure palace and two tons of gold as an advance raise for next year.

    Hail Ba'al!
    rattler2 wrote: »
    I think you're gonna have to pay for the repairs...

    Already covered; don't worry, our MONTHLY budget makes the Grand Nagus look like a pauper.

    Hail Ba'al!
  • kuntelkuntel Member Posts: 16,484 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    worffan101 wrote: »
    You're promoted. Have a new pleasure palace and two tons of gold as an advance raise for next year.

    Hail Ba'al!

    Why thank you sir. If you require my assistance again, please call. I'd be happy to help the Grand Regime anytime.

    *Leaves bridge, and returns to Earth. Specifcally Egypt, where his new palace is.*
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    kuntel wrote: »
    Why thank you sir. If you require my assistance again, please call. I'd be happy to help the Grand Regime anytime.

    *Leaves bridge, and returns to Earth. Specifcally Egypt, where his new palace is.*

    Enjoy! And do watch out for Goa'uld in canopic jars. We had this nasty incident with Hathor once, in Central America, and then there was that Osiris affair...

    Hail Ba'al!
  • kintishokintisho Member Posts: 1,040 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    Blasphemy!! Hallowed are the Ori (or the Iconians take your pic)
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    kintisho wrote: »
    Blasphemy!! Hallowed are the Ori (or the Iconians take your pic)

    Already beat the Ori, with the Sangraal.

    Pretty sure that's in this thread somewhere, actually...

    Hail Ba'al!
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,969 Community Moderator
    edited June 2014
    That's it...

    Hey Ori guy! Hallowed are my QUANTUM TORPEDOES!





    Wait... the Lexington is still undergoing repairs... dang it. I blast you later.
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    rattler2 wrote: »
    That's it...

    Hey Ori guy! Hallowed are my QUANTUM TORPEDOES!





    Wait... the Lexington is still undergoing repairs... dang it. I blast you later.

    Need a Ha'tak to tide you over? I have open access to Requisitions, and a Nepotism Quota to fill.

    Hail Ba'al!
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,969 Community Moderator
    edited June 2014
    Well... Starfleet might enjoy a chance to study one at some point...
    I'll see if I can refit it with Starfleet tech.
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
  • kintishokintisho Member Posts: 1,040 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    Ill match your quantums and raise you some tricobalt enhanced transphasics...

    Hail O'Neil, he was the only true god in any of it...
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    rattler2 wrote: »
    Well... Starfleet might enjoy a chance to study one at some point...
    I'll see if I can refit it with Starfleet tech.
    I'll send it over at once.
    kintisho wrote: »
    Ill match your quantums and raise you some tricobalt enhanced transphasics...

    Hail O'Neil, he was the only true god in any of it...

    NO FIGHTING AMONG THE MINIONS OF BA'AL (tm)!!!!!!!!!

    And perhaps. He works for Ba'al now, though. Turns out all it took was a meeting with the Sovereign's host (who was VERY upset about being woken up)*, and a few months of seeing Sovereign Ba'al execute idiotic politicians and streamline life for everyone. He's in the military now, works for First Prime Teal'c.

    Hail Ba'al!

    *The Sovereign's host has the enviable position of being fully awake and aware for the Sovereign's romantic dalliances, and asleep and blissfully unaware for all of Ba'al's boring meetings.

    He's only asserted his personality once in over fifteen hundred years. And he was VERY upset to be dragged out of "reruns" of hot dates to deal with some annoying Tau'ri colonel.
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,969 Community Moderator
    edited June 2014
    O'Neill wrote:
    That's O'Neill... TWO Ls! *Holds up three fingers*

    Had to say it.
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
  • kuntelkuntel Member Posts: 16,484 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    kintisho wrote: »
    Ill match your quantums and raise you some tricobalt enhanced transphasics...

    Hail O'Neil, he was the only true god in any of it...

    O'Neil? You mean this O'Neil?

    *Throws Jack O'Neil of the Body Squad infront*

    O'Neil: Please forgive me, my Lord! Please!

    Yeah... not very god-like is he?

    *Kicks O'Neil.*
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    kuntel wrote: »
    O'Neil? You mean this O'Neil?

    *Throws Jack O'Neil of the Body Squad infront*

    O'Neil: Please forgive me, my Lord! Please!

    Yeah... not very god-like is he?

    *Kicks O'Neil.*

    Wrong O'Neill.

    Jack O'Neill is in the Glorious Military, works with a Danny Jackson and a Major Carter as First Prime Teal'c's underlings. He has introduced the First Prime to Star Wars and Captain Planet (don't ask why).

    Hail Ba'al!
  • kuntelkuntel Member Posts: 16,484 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    worffan101 wrote: »
    Wrong O'Neill.

    Jack O'Neill is in the Glorious Military, works with a Danny Jackson and a Major Carter as First Prime Teal'c's underlings. He has introduced the First Prime to Star Wars and Captain Planet (don't ask why).

    Hail Ba'al!

    Really? We have a Daniel Jacksson on the Body Squad as well. Guess that..

    *Looks at names.*

    Oh.. I thought those were typos... sorry!

    *Throws O'Neil in with the rest.*

    Anyway, anyone need someone disposed off? The palace is fun, but I'm somewhat of a, uh, workaholic... ha ha ha...:D
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    kuntel wrote: »
    Really? We have a Daniel Jacksson on the Body Squad as well. Guess that..

    *Looks at names.*

    Oh.. I thought those were typos... sorry!

    *Throws O'Neil in with the rest.*

    Anyway, anyone need someone disposed off? The palace is fun, but I'm somewhat of a, uh, workaholic... ha ha ha...:D

    Yeah, we found this really weird planet called Asyunti. Check it out, but don't kill too many people.

    Hail Ba'al!
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,969 Community Moderator
    edited June 2014
    Um... who do I talk to about this... request?

    *Holds up a PADD showing a skimpy outfit*
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
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