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Stargate Hail Ba'al Rambling

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  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    mjarbar wrote: »
    Not cookies I hope as I won't have anything to bribe..I mean donate...to the Grand High Vizier in trying to push up the nepotism quota and hopefully a nice job!

    What are your skills? We have a few openings. Including head of commerce on Sarpedon, if you're in the mood for an off-world posting...
  • organicmanfredorganicmanfred Member Posts: 3,236 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    worffan101 wrote: »
    What are your skills? We have a few openings. Including head of commerce on Sarpedon, if you're in the mood for an off-world posting...

    Worffan, i pm you in about a few minutes. Not sure if its important but there has to be something done from my side.
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    Worffan, i pm you in about a few minutes. Not sure if its important but there has to be something done from my side.

    If it's a problem with the Glorious Regime, or your minions, or something, just post it here. I'm the fricking Grand Vizier, I do whatever I want to whomever I want (the Sovereign and a couple of high-level officers excepted).

    Hail Ba'al!
  • organicmanfredorganicmanfred Member Posts: 3,236 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    worffan101 wrote: »
    If it's a problem with the Glorious Regime, or your minions, or something, just post it here. I'm the fricking Grand Vizier, I do whatever I want to whomever I want (the Sovereign and a couple of high-level officers excepted).

    Hail Ba'al!

    Private matter only
  • mjarbarmjarbar Member Posts: 2,084 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    worffan101 wrote: »
    What are your skills? We have a few openings. Including head of commerce on Sarpedon, if you're in the mood for an off-world posting...

    I don't mind off world at all, do I get to execute the workforce if they don't meet their own quota and can I requisition my own Al'kesh?
    hZbIdbh.jpg
    THANK YOU FOUNDRY - YOUR CONTENT GAVE ME MANY HAPPY HOURS
    Get the Forums Enhancement Extension!
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    mjarbar wrote: »
    I don't mind off world at all, do I get to execute the workforce if they don't meet their own quota and can I requisition my own Al'kesh?

    --Good.

    --No. We're working on being a kinder, more genre-savvy regime than that of most Goa'uld. Seems to have worked.

    --No, but we CAN get you a personal-use tel'tak. The job also comes with free dental, free health care, and a mansion, plus ten Kull Warriors as guards and enforcers.

    What are your qualifications?

    And Hail Ba'al!
  • kuntelkuntel Member Posts: 16,484 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    I'm back....

    Vizier, I am sad to report that not all your minions passed, many with affiliations with Wraith supremisists and Jaffa radicals... I had to execute five total. Happily, none of them were majorly important!

    *Muttering* Even worse, it seems organicmanfred is completely loyal... *sigh* I want to kill him so badly...

    Hail Ba'al...
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    kuntel wrote: »
    I'm back....

    Vizier, I am sad to report that not all your minions passed, many with affiliations with Wraith supremisists and Jaffa radicals... I had to execute five total. Happily, none of them were majorly important!

    *Muttering* Even worse, it seems organicmanfred is completely loyal... *sigh* I want to kill him so badly...

    Hail Ba'al...

    Wonderful.

    Only five, relatively minor traitors...

    Find some loyal Minions of Ba'al (tm) to take over. Get First Prime Teal'c to make some recommendations for the Jaffa, and ask that Todd chap for which Wraith can be trusted to not go insane when we use that retrovirus to make 'em human.

    Hail Ba'al!
  • kuntelkuntel Member Posts: 16,484 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    worffan101 wrote: »
    Wonderful.

    Only five, relatively minor traitors...

    Find some loyal Minions of Ba'al (tm) to take over. Get First Prime Teal'c to make some recommendations for the Jaffa, and ask that Todd chap for which Wraith can be trusted to not go insane when we use that retrovirus to make 'em human.

    Hail Ba'al!

    Already done, of course. The Sovreign will be pleased...

    Hail Ba'al!
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    kuntel wrote: »
    Already done, of course. The Sovreign will be pleased...

    Hail Ba'al!

    Excellent! A commendation has been attached to your file for your initiative!

    Hail Ba'al!
  • legendarylycan#5411 legendarylycan Member Posts: 37,276 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    worffan101 wrote: »
    The title is Grand Vizier, minion! I am Grand Vizier Worffan101! Fear my Not-Evil-At-All cackling, my Responsible Government black vampire cape, my Totally-Not-Treacherous goatee, and my So-Not-Malevolent goatee-stroking skills! HAIL BA'AL!!!!!
    so basically you're this guy with a cape...
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    #LegalizeAwoo

    A normie goes "Oh, what's this?"
    An otaku goes "UwU, what's this?"
    A furry goes "OwO, what's this?"
    A werewolf goes "Awoo, what's this?"


    "It's nothing personal, I just don't feel like I've gotten to know a person until I've sniffed their crotch."
    "We said 'no' to Mr. Curiosity. We're not home. Curiosity is not welcome, it is not to be invited in. Curiosity...is bad. It gets you in trouble, it gets you killed, and more importantly...it makes you poor!"
    Passion and Serenity are one.
    I gain power by understanding both.
    In the chaos of their battle, I bring order.
    I am a shadow, darkness born from light.
    The Force is united within me.
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,969 Community Moderator
    edited June 2014
    Starfleet Intelligence recieved some odd reports from one of your worlds. Something about... green toxic crystals?
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    rattler2 wrote: »
    Starfleet Intelligence recieved some odd reports from one of your worlds. Something about... green toxic crystals?

    Not my fault. We have the Hazmat teams working triple overtime.

    All further information is classified by order of Ba'al. Hail Ba'al!
  • sander233sander233 Member Posts: 3,992 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    worffan101 wrote: »
    Not my fault. We have the Hazmat teams working triple overtime.

    All further information is classified by order of Ba'al. Hail Ba'al!

    Speaking of, our hazardous waste disposal ships need better shielding. My boys did not sign up to be possessed by energy beings.
    16d89073-5444-45ad-9053-45434ac9498f.png~original

    ...Oh, baby, you know, I've really got to leave you / Oh, I can hear it callin 'me / I said don't you hear it callin' me the way it used to do?...
    - Anne Bredon
  • ryan218ryan218 Member Posts: 36,106 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    sander233 wrote: »
    Speaking of, our hazardous waste disposal ships need better shielding. My boys did not sign up to be possessed by energy beings.

    Ah, yes... disposal...

    Are we using any other planet in that system? Naquadah Generator + Star = Problem Solved.
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    sander233 wrote: »
    Speaking of, our hazardous waste disposal ships need better shielding. My boys did not sign up to be possessed by energy beings.
    Damn it...

    Call Supply, and yell at them until they let you requisition some Asgard energy shields.
    ryan218 wrote: »
    Ah, yes... disposal...

    Are we using any other planet in that system? Naquadah Generator + Star = Problem Solved.

    Can't do that, it's supposed to be a new resort planet. That reminds me, kuntel? We have another traitor for you to discreetly remove. Seems that System Lord Moloc has been doing some nasty stuff and leaving toxic waste lying around.

    Hail Ba'al!
  • kuntelkuntel Member Posts: 16,484 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    worffan101 wrote: »


    Can't do that, it's supposed to be a new resort planet. That reminds me, kuntel? We have another traitor for you to discreetly remove. Seems that System Lord Moloc has been doing some nasty stuff and leaving toxic waste lying around.

    Hail Ba'al!

    I shall depart immediately. Seeming as my new postongnis here, feel free to call upon me for any other assassinations you need.

    Hail Ba'al.

    *Bows and leaves room. The sound of a Tel'tac taking off soon follows.*
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,969 Community Moderator
    edited June 2014
    We've got a tenative ID on the crystals. A substance called... Tiberium. Valuable as a resource, but toxic to Carbon based life without proper protection.
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    kuntel wrote: »
    I shall depart immediately. Seeming as my new postongnis here, feel free to call upon me for any other assassinations you need.

    Hail Ba'al.

    *Bows and leaves room. The sound of a Tel'tac taking off soon follows.*
    Thank you. Hail Ba'al!
    rattler2 wrote: »
    We've got a tenative ID on the crystals. A substance called... Tiberium. Valuable as a resource, but toxic to Carbon based life without proper protection.

    H'mmm...

    Send it to the labs, with full details and precautions. If we can weaponize this, we may finally defeat that Michael Kenmore jerk and his Wraith hybrids.

    Hail Ba'al!
  • ryan218ryan218 Member Posts: 36,106 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    rattler2 wrote: »
    We've got a tenative ID on the crystals. A substance called... Tiberium. Valuable as a resource, but toxic to Carbon based life without proper protection.

    *Grabs suit and baseball bat.*

    Paid protection? :P

    In all seriousness though...

    I'll get the naquadah generator.
  • ryan218ryan218 Member Posts: 36,106 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    worffan101 wrote: »
    Thank you. Hail Ba'al!


    H'mmm...

    Send it to the labs, with full details and precautions. If we can weaponize this, we may finally defeat that Michael Kenmore jerk and his Wraith hybrids.

    Hail Ba'al!

    B-b-but... he's Trip!
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    ryan218 wrote: »
    *Grabs suit and baseball bat.*

    Paid protection? :P

    In all seriousness though...

    I'll get the naquadah generator.

    Do it. Exercise all necessary care and prudence; part of the reason we minions have such good insurance is because the Sovereign HATES having to hire replacement minions. The loyalty trials alone are so damn expensive...

    Hail Ba'al!
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,969 Community Moderator
    edited June 2014
    More like fully enclosed hazmat or hostile environment gear. We also have unconfirmed reports of some kind of... cult... cropping up using a Scorpion Tail in a triangle as their symbol. Starfleet is investigating... but so far... we got little to go on.
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    ryan218 wrote: »
    B-b-but... he's Trip!

    Yes, but he represents an active and dangerous threat to our organization and to the person of the Sovereign. He must be contained and his minions either destroyed or folded into our own.

    Hail Ba'al!
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    rattler2 wrote: »
    More like fully enclosed hazmat or hostile environment gear. We also have unconfirmed reports of some kind of... cult... cropping up using a Scorpion Tail in a triangle as their symbol. Starfleet is investigating... but so far... we got little to go on.

    ...

    Oh, potties.

    First Prime Teal'c! Have the Jaffa on standby, full hazmat/EVA protocols!

    And someone hail Grand Admiral Tacofangs and tell him that we need air cav!

    High General Jade, you are hereby authorized to use all force you deem necessary to contain this threat. Hail Ba'al!
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,969 Community Moderator
    edited June 2014
    I'm a Starfleet Captain, but I do plan on investigating. I'll be sure to have Quantum Torpedoes loaded and ready in case this cult turns out to be a threat...

    *Checks a PADD*

    They got Tiberium enhanced nukes? Scratch that. They're a threat.
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    rattler2 wrote: »
    I'm a Starfleet Captain, but I do plan on investigating. I'll be sure to have Quantum Torpedoes loaded and ready in case this cult turns out to be a threat...

    *Checks a PADD*

    They got Tiberium enhanced nukes? Scratch that. They're a threat.

    DESTROY THEM WITH EXTREME PREJUDICE!!!!!!!!!

    That's an order, Captain!

    First Prime Teal'c, mobilize the fleet, we're heading out on a possible XK event!

    And someone get basic Keter-level containment protocols ready!

    Hail Ba'al!
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,969 Community Moderator
    edited June 2014
    *Returns a few hours later, with heavy damage to the Sovereign Class USS Lexington, and I look pretty roughed up as well with hair loose and a cut over the left eye*
    We got a problem. Those nukes pack a punch... and their more than just a cult. They call themselves the Brotherhood of Nod, and they've got serious firepower and a small fleet at least. We were able to hold our own for a while as their tech isn't as advanced, but they had us outnumbered. I've never seen some of this tech before.
    *Hands over a PADD with important data*
    I've sent a copy to Starfleet Command already, just in case this group shows up anywhere else.
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
  • worffan101worffan101 Member Posts: 9,518 Arc User
    edited June 2014
    rattler2 wrote: »
    *Returns a few hours later, with heavy damage to the Sovereign Class USS Lexington, and I look pretty roughed up as well with hair loose and a cut over the left eye*
    We got a problem. Those nukes pack a punch... and their more than just a cult. They call themselves the Brotherhood of Nod, and they've got serious firepower and a small fleet at least. We were able to hold our own for a while as their tech isn't as advanced, but they had us outnumbered. I've never seen some of this tech before.
    *Hands over a PADD with important data*
    I've sent a copy to Starfleet Command already, just in case this group shows up anywhere else.

    Right. The kid gloves come OFF.

    Jaffa! Cree!

    First Prime Teal'c, bring the flagship. And power up the superweapon. And send someone trustworthy to Dakara to get THAT superweapon ready. And SOMEBODY GET ME A DEDICATED HOTLINE TO SOVEREIGN BA'AL RIGHT THIS INSTANT OR I'LL CANCEL ALL CONJUGAL VISITS FOR THE NEXT SIX MONTHS!!!!!!!

    Hail Ba'al!
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,969 Community Moderator
    edited June 2014
    We also intercepted some transmissions. They are fanatics... and the name Kane kept coming up.
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
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