Stories about star trek

Comments

• jacksalssome Member Posts: 4 Arc User

  March 2013 edited March 2013

  Admirals log Star date 64844.9: My crew are starting to get bored waiting for these slow cardassians to give us there formal surrender, It has been three days and im now waiting for the go-ahead to warp in and blow up cardassia, Then one of the children on board said go in kill the *&$# and get out before star fleet says NO. Then i woke up my first officer layed in a corse tuned off the communications network and slip steamed in there, Everyone on the ship was screaming for joy as they got in the gunners and fired at the first ship they sore. Dam it was a dam ferengi trying to sell us worthless TRIBBLE that we don't need- Two hours later we shot down half the fleet, blow up four planets and had a baby.
  
  On the other side of the qudrent: What the $&#* is all this screaming.
  
  
  Thank you Please give credit if you post this somewhere else - Jacksalssome

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• sumghai Member Posts: 1,072 Arc User

  March 2013 edited March 2013

  Your prose is exceptionally rushed, riddled with spelling/punctuation errors, and the plot made no sense. It took me several minutes longer than usual to understand what was actually going on, so I can't say I really enjoyed reading it at all.
  
  I suggest getting in touch with a beta reader on fanfiction.net, as they will help you fix narrative and writing style issues.
  
  I myself in the process of writing a crossover fanfiction, Finders Keepers. In short, the crew of a Federation starship exploring an interphasic rift accidentally stumble into an alternative reality based on the Love Hina romantic comedy manga series, and supposed hilarity would ensue when both parties claim ownership of a missing Federation survey probe.
  
  On a more serious note, I've also adapted STO's SS Azura rescue mission Stranded in Space into a screenplay for a pilot episode of a (hypothetical) prime universe Trek TV series. It probably needs a rewrite, so I'll have to get back to everyone on that.

  Laws of thermodynamics as applied to life: 0 - You must play the game. 1 - You can't win. 2 - You can't break even. 3 - You can't quit.

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• rachelj88 Member Posts: 465 Arc User

  March 2013 edited March 2013

  Captains Log Supplemental.
  
  On a routine stop at Drozana station, I decided to give my crew a small stint of shore leave.
  
  I thought I'd stop by the bar and finish up on my reports that I'd later send to Starfleet for review.
  I casually stood by the bar, I took out my PADD from my bag that I had took along with me, when out of the corner of my eye I spotted a strange looking fellow, tall, wearing a coppery brown environmental suit.
  
  I stood my ground curiously as he breathed heavily down my neck, clearly I didn't seem to be welcomed by this person. I moved along the bar to gain my space, hoping the man would take the hint that I'm quite busy. He continued to stalk my every move, at one point he tried dancing with me... which was strange to me considering my initial thought.
  
  I decided that I should confront the man, "Please" I exclaimed, "I'm very busy, I'd very much like you to give me some space". he said nothing, he didn't move, I turned away and sighed, shaking my head at the the Ferengi bar-staff.
  
  As I continued I decided I should give him a much wider berth, and booked myself a holo-suite for an hour.
  Just as I was about to enter, I was ambushed in a cloud of fire suppresseant... The End
  
  *giggles*
  
  
  RachelJ88

  [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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