test content
Logo
What is the Arc Client?
Install Arc
Starting a new story, need feedback!
System
Member, NoReporting Posts: 178,019 Arc User
Hey all, I'm starting a story based around my ship and it's crew. I'm not going to go into the details of what the story entails but before I really get into the meat of the adventure, I'm going to pass along the first chapter of it and ask for some judging and feedback on it. Please be gentle by the way, I haven't done too many roleplay stories before and well, this being startrek. It's hard to resist.
Chapter 1 - Flight
Captain Edward Ed Albane stepped forward onto the bridge of the U.S.S Edmonton; his crew quickly stood to attention and saluted their commanding officer. "At ease" He told his officers and crew. He darted down the bridge and settled into his captain's chair, tossing out a quick order to activate the view-screen and move out of space dock, one-forth impulse speed. Although the impulse engines were more than 200 meters away. He could almost hear and feel the rumbling of the engines as they powered up and began to accelerate to roughly 50, 000KM/second. A "Rough-Guess" by his Vulcan Engineer he remembered from the debriefing of the Edmonton.
As the Primary hull of the constitution class vessel began to poke its way out of the star dock. Ed tapped a few buttons on his LCARs interface tied to his captains chair and pulled up the debriefing of his mission from Admiral Quinn. A simple delivery mission, a Bajoran ambassador to the Federation had finished his business on Earth and needed to be taken back to Bajor, en route via Deep Space Nine. He quickly scanned though the supplementary reports by his First Officer Commander Ricky and Chief Medical Officer Lieutenant Selvok, about the Accommodations the ambassador has been given, his schedule of Holo-deck use and various privileges he had been given aboard. In 2409, a time of war. Alliances and diplomacy remain very important to the federation and thus the happiness and comfort of the ambassador remained of top priority. Satisfied with the report, he ordered helm to Deep Space Nine, Warp 6. Ed stood up and placed his gloved hand upon his Helm officers shoulder. Giving him a nod of approval, muttering under his breath, Take her there nice n easy. Dont hit any road bumps along the way.
The nervous helmsman nodded and replied with a noticeable Y-Yes sir! before quickly tapping a few buttons, routing a bit more power to the inertial dampeners. No noticeable effect, but in the chance of a surprise attack at warp from the Klingons or the Cardassians. It would help reduce injury to the crew and more importantly, the V.I.P on-board. Ed smiled at the Helmsman and quickly snapped back to attention, making a quick strut to his chair before sitting down and going though the system reports prepared for him by his officers.
All systems report condition green a voice from behind mentioned, Commander Ricky stepped onto the bridge and quickly rearranged his outfit. Ricky is a young man in his mid twenties, but well suited for the rank and position bestowed on him. Formerly the Edmontons Chief Engineer, he takes a lot of pride in the condition of the ship and whenever not found on the bridge or his quarters. He takes time in engineering to constantly fine-tune and work on the systems of the ship, demanding near Borg perfection from the engineers. Dont waste your time on those reports; Ive already scanned though them, and if there was something wrong with any of these systems. It wouldnt last long. Not against me. He let out a small chuckle and turned to the view screen.
Comma Ed quickly paused and let out a small cough into his gloves. I mean. Captain Liz Nhili never let me get away without reviewing these logs and neither should you. Your first officer now, act like it. Treat this crew as you would its systems. Its bad enough I can be slack with them. Dont pick up that bad habit.
Yes sir. Ricky ran his fingers down his chin and thought for a moment, visibly adding mental notes to add to his log at the end of the day. Standing up, Ed motioned to the captains chair and walked into his ready room. To read the logs in peace to a can of Soda, Ed ordered the computer to lock the doors behind him and replicate him a can of Soda, of which he quickly grabbed and cracked open to a loud Pffshhh! sound of the carbon escaping into the air. Sitting down he tapped a few buttons on his control panel and started his log for the day.
- Captains Log, Stardate 84682.4. The Edmonton and her crew are in route to Deep Space Nine, for what I hope to be a very uneventful delivery mission so we can return to our deep space exploration in the Hromi Sector. My new First officer is working out fairly well. Ricky made for a excellent engineer and I feel although he will have difficulties letting go of that position to adapt to his new role. But he is a capable officer and I have no doubt that he can perform admirably.
Hmm seems alright I suppose. Subconsciously, Ed rubbed the bristles of his beard and grabbed his soda, sloshing the contents around in a circular motion. He reflected upon himself in his ready room, Mentally reviewing the history of Deep Space Nine, the Defiant, the Dominion War and Benjamin Sisko.
Trivia -
* Edward Albane is my ingame character. My handle is @NightstrikerX is you ever want to roleplay.
* Commander Ricky is a nod to Family Guy's "Ensign Ricky". Who when assigned to a away mission with Kirk, Spock, and McCoy. Replyed "Awh TRIBBLE" as he was wearing a Red-shirt at the time. Dispite being a former engineer, Commander Ricky also wears a red-shirt.
* Although it's not mentioned in the story. The Edmonton does have a full-time helmsman. There are a total of 8 crewmembers and only 4 have been mentioned. 3 in name. Selvok, Ricky, and Edward.
Chapter 1 - Flight
Captain Edward Ed Albane stepped forward onto the bridge of the U.S.S Edmonton; his crew quickly stood to attention and saluted their commanding officer. "At ease" He told his officers and crew. He darted down the bridge and settled into his captain's chair, tossing out a quick order to activate the view-screen and move out of space dock, one-forth impulse speed. Although the impulse engines were more than 200 meters away. He could almost hear and feel the rumbling of the engines as they powered up and began to accelerate to roughly 50, 000KM/second. A "Rough-Guess" by his Vulcan Engineer he remembered from the debriefing of the Edmonton.
As the Primary hull of the constitution class vessel began to poke its way out of the star dock. Ed tapped a few buttons on his LCARs interface tied to his captains chair and pulled up the debriefing of his mission from Admiral Quinn. A simple delivery mission, a Bajoran ambassador to the Federation had finished his business on Earth and needed to be taken back to Bajor, en route via Deep Space Nine. He quickly scanned though the supplementary reports by his First Officer Commander Ricky and Chief Medical Officer Lieutenant Selvok, about the Accommodations the ambassador has been given, his schedule of Holo-deck use and various privileges he had been given aboard. In 2409, a time of war. Alliances and diplomacy remain very important to the federation and thus the happiness and comfort of the ambassador remained of top priority. Satisfied with the report, he ordered helm to Deep Space Nine, Warp 6. Ed stood up and placed his gloved hand upon his Helm officers shoulder. Giving him a nod of approval, muttering under his breath, Take her there nice n easy. Dont hit any road bumps along the way.
The nervous helmsman nodded and replied with a noticeable Y-Yes sir! before quickly tapping a few buttons, routing a bit more power to the inertial dampeners. No noticeable effect, but in the chance of a surprise attack at warp from the Klingons or the Cardassians. It would help reduce injury to the crew and more importantly, the V.I.P on-board. Ed smiled at the Helmsman and quickly snapped back to attention, making a quick strut to his chair before sitting down and going though the system reports prepared for him by his officers.
All systems report condition green a voice from behind mentioned, Commander Ricky stepped onto the bridge and quickly rearranged his outfit. Ricky is a young man in his mid twenties, but well suited for the rank and position bestowed on him. Formerly the Edmontons Chief Engineer, he takes a lot of pride in the condition of the ship and whenever not found on the bridge or his quarters. He takes time in engineering to constantly fine-tune and work on the systems of the ship, demanding near Borg perfection from the engineers. Dont waste your time on those reports; Ive already scanned though them, and if there was something wrong with any of these systems. It wouldnt last long. Not against me. He let out a small chuckle and turned to the view screen.
Comma Ed quickly paused and let out a small cough into his gloves. I mean. Captain Liz Nhili never let me get away without reviewing these logs and neither should you. Your first officer now, act like it. Treat this crew as you would its systems. Its bad enough I can be slack with them. Dont pick up that bad habit.
Yes sir. Ricky ran his fingers down his chin and thought for a moment, visibly adding mental notes to add to his log at the end of the day. Standing up, Ed motioned to the captains chair and walked into his ready room. To read the logs in peace to a can of Soda, Ed ordered the computer to lock the doors behind him and replicate him a can of Soda, of which he quickly grabbed and cracked open to a loud Pffshhh! sound of the carbon escaping into the air. Sitting down he tapped a few buttons on his control panel and started his log for the day.
- Captains Log, Stardate 84682.4. The Edmonton and her crew are in route to Deep Space Nine, for what I hope to be a very uneventful delivery mission so we can return to our deep space exploration in the Hromi Sector. My new First officer is working out fairly well. Ricky made for a excellent engineer and I feel although he will have difficulties letting go of that position to adapt to his new role. But he is a capable officer and I have no doubt that he can perform admirably.
Hmm seems alright I suppose. Subconsciously, Ed rubbed the bristles of his beard and grabbed his soda, sloshing the contents around in a circular motion. He reflected upon himself in his ready room, Mentally reviewing the history of Deep Space Nine, the Defiant, the Dominion War and Benjamin Sisko.
Trivia -
* Edward Albane is my ingame character. My handle is @NightstrikerX is you ever want to roleplay.
* Commander Ricky is a nod to Family Guy's "Ensign Ricky". Who when assigned to a away mission with Kirk, Spock, and McCoy. Replyed "Awh TRIBBLE" as he was wearing a Red-shirt at the time. Dispite being a former engineer, Commander Ricky also wears a red-shirt.
* Although it's not mentioned in the story. The Edmonton does have a full-time helmsman. There are a total of 8 crewmembers and only 4 have been mentioned. 3 in name. Selvok, Ricky, and Edward.
Post edited by Unknown User on
0
Comments