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Hilarious Fortune Cookie Fortunes

takeshi6takeshi6 Member Posts: 752 Arc User
edited August 2014 in Ten Forward
Earlier today, Mom brought in Chinese Take-Out for herself and Dad (don't much like Chinese myself, aside from the Rice and Sweet-'n-Sour Chicken), and gave me the Fortune Cookies that came with (I do like the Fortune Cookies, and Mom and Dad can't have them for various reasons).

One of the Fortunes was your typical wise proverb: "We are taught by every person that we meet." The other Fortune, however, in the first Cookie I opened, was absolutely HILARIOUS: "About time I got out of that cookie."

Anyway, I'm curious: what is the most hillarious thing that you read on a Fortune Cookie Fortune? I'm not talking about the proverbs, or the things that try predicting the future - I'm talking about something that had you laughing so hard your friends/family wanted to know what was up - and possibly drawing the attention of the other restaurant-goers if you read it in an actual Chinese Restaurant.

I look forward to seeing what hilarious Fortunes people have found in their Fortune Cookies. :D
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Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • jorantomalakjorantomalak Member Posts: 7,133 Arc User
    edited August 2014
    I got one once that said "Today is the perfect day to go on a journey " i looked outside and it was a torentuol downpour with flash flood warnings lol


    sometimes reality is far funnier then fiction no?
  • steamwrightsteamwright Member Posts: 2,820
    edited August 2014
    Can't recall my funniest ones, but a quick google of "funny real fortune cookies" pictures caused a laugh. One pic read "The fortune you seek is in another cookie". The pic below it read "Ignore previous cookie". :rolleyes:
  • rattler2rattler2 Member Posts: 57,971 Community Moderator
    edited August 2014
    Its been a while since I had one so I don't remember.
    However... I feel the need to quote Uncle.
    Uncle wrote:
    Never... mock... the cookie.
    db80k0m-89201ed8-eadb-45d3-830f-bb2f0d4c0fe7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2ExOGQ4ZWM2LTUyZjQtNDdiMS05YTI1LTVlYmZkYmJkOGM3N1wvZGI4MGswbS04OTIwMWVkOC1lYWRiLTQ1ZDMtODMwZi1iYjJmMGQ0YzBmZTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.8G-Pg35Qi8qxiKLjAofaKRH6fmNH3qAAEI628gW0eXc
    I can't take it anymore! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something CRAZY happens again?!
    The nut who actually ground out many packs. The resident forum voice of reason (I HAZ FORUM REP! YAY!)
  • sander233sander233 Member Posts: 3,992 Arc User
    edited August 2014
    One ominous fortune I cracked open a day before I was scheduled to go under for a major surgery:
    Live Every Day As Though It Were Your Last.
    :eek::eek::eek::eek:
    16d89073-5444-45ad-9053-45434ac9498f.png~original

    ...Oh, baby, you know, I've really got to leave you / Oh, I can hear it callin 'me / I said don't you hear it callin' me the way it used to do?...
    - Anne Bredon
  • artan42artan42 Member Posts: 10,450 Bug Hunter
    edited August 2014
    Help I'm trapped in the cook.....

    *Blood Splatters*.
    22762792376_ac7c992b7c_o.png
    Norway and Yeager dammit... I still want my Typhoon and Jupiter though.
    JJ Trek The Kelvin Timeline is just Trek and it's fully canon... get over it. But I still prefer TAR.

    #TASforSTO


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    '...The Federation. Starfleet. We're not a military agency.' Scotty: Beyond
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