We know you're out there Lurkers. We may not know how many or who, but every now and then one of you posts and says that you lurk.
I estimate anywhere between 1-4 lurkers. I am being pessimistic. Its the "Price is Right" mentality of better to be under your estimate than over.
Anyway, this thread is meant as a place for you, the lurker to come and post something.
What? That goes against your lurker code of conduct contract? I had no idea.
Go on, live a little!
Would it help if I promise that no one will mallet, magically alter, open with a can opener, maul or say someting rude to you?
Here. Here's a couch and a table with your choice of coffee, tea or cocoa of the hightest quaility. Add to that donuts, bacon, pancakes, muffins, and of course cookies.
There now isn't that nice?

Now if you'll excuse me, I have some more cookies to pull out of the oven.
*Goes into kitchen and starts sharpening a large butcher knife while chuckling evilly to himself.*
Comments
*Rises up behind Shinzon in complete silence. Eyes buggy and bloodshot.*
ShhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
You'll spook them.
*Takes several creepy spindley legged steps towards the wall and puts his ear to it.*
Yes. They are here. I can hear them, scuttling about back there searching for whatever scraps they can find. We must be patient.
*Nods and smiles an all to wide and toothy grin.*
BBBRRAAAAIIIINNNNSSSS!
I mean I've posted, just not that often.
Besides, Momma always told me "Forums is the DEVIL!!!"
Welcome. Both of you. You'll be happy to know that I've just added no can openers to the list of no-no's at the top of the thread.
Same. I don't post nearly as often as some people. I just like lurking I guess, or I just don't have much to say.
*Head back into kitchen to continue preparing the lavish feast he's planned. Realises he needs a can opener.*
Hmm...
An electric chainsaw will get that open lickidy-split.
It seems safe to come out.
*Hairy stands up and stretches a little.*
*Sniffs the air again.*
Baked goods? Mmmm...
*Strolls over to the couch and sits down. From out of nowhere Hairy pulls out a bottle of kanar and begins to drink.*
:eek:
Persish the thought!
Ush-hay about the unt-hay!
Its all a horrible trap. Run! Run while you still can. Run, I say.
Soylent Green is people!
*Runs off screaming*
Ususual poster....the smell of untainted intentions....you must be new here!
*starts spraying hot lead at the hordes of 10 Forward as he looks back to TrekGuy* Tell my wife I love her....
*waddles off into the oncoming swarm, barrels blazing; his voice trailing off as he goes* Here's some for you... and you... don't think I've forgotten about you...
Now now now. Have some batteries Gonk and settle down. Dawson is harmless. This is not some attempt to turn you all into a lavish feast.
*Holds up cook book.*
See, its says "To Serve Lurkers."
Now, enjoy these sandwiches and our Sunday movie feature!
*Turns on the TV.*
What'll everyone have to drink? I've got a fully stocked bar and garage.
Why? Why drink lead?
HOW? How drink lead from gun?
*Takes hat off head for a moment, then tosses a blanket over Dawson. Shakes his head in confusion, then hobbles over to the couch, sits down to watch Trekkies and has some popcorn.*
OH! I love this part!
*Laughs heartily.*
That's why I drank the lead.
I'd better go make a bunch of cinnabons. Oh and lets order some more Kanar.
*Stumps off to the kitchen.*
Well for starters you need to trick them somehow. I suggest telling them the gun is actually ice cream.
cute enough?
*Pulls a note pad and quill pen out of his jacket. Makes a note on his pad.*