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Lurker Wildlife Preserve.

SystemSystem Member, NoReporting Posts: 178,019 Arc User
edited March 2011 in Ten Forward
We know you're out there Lurkers. We may not know how many or who, but every now and then one of you posts and says that you lurk.

I estimate anywhere between 1-4 lurkers. I am being pessimistic. Its the "Price is Right" mentality of better to be under your estimate than over.

Anyway, this thread is meant as a place for you, the lurker to come and post something.

What? That goes against your lurker code of conduct contract? I had no idea.

Go on, live a little!

Would it help if I promise that no one will mallet, magically alter, open with a can opener, maul or say someting rude to you?

Here. Here's a couch and a table with your choice of coffee, tea or cocoa of the hightest quaility. Add to that donuts, bacon, pancakes, muffins, and of course cookies.

There now isn't that nice? :D

Now if you'll excuse me, I have some more cookies to pull out of the oven.
*Goes into kitchen and starts sharpening a large butcher knife while chuckling evilly to himself.*
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments

  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    *gets into position at bell tower, waiting for lurkers*
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    Cookies? You have cookies? I'll stay for cookies.. and maybe some coffee.
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    This is perhaps the single most self defeating thread I have ever seen. We have no way of knowing if they are in here, no way of knowing WHEN they are in here, and part-time lurkers like me don't count.
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    This is perhaps the single most self defeating thread I have ever seen. We have no way of knowing if they are in here, no way of knowing WHEN they are in here, and part-time lurkers like me don't count.

    *Rises up behind Shinzon in complete silence. Eyes buggy and bloodshot.*

    ShhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

    You'll spook them.

    *Takes several creepy spindley legged steps towards the wall and puts his ear to it.*

    Yes. They are here. I can hear them, scuttling about back there searching for whatever scraps they can find. We must be patient.

    *Nods and smiles an all to wide and toothy grin.*
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    *Takes several creepy spindley legged steps towards the wall and puts his ear to it.*

    Yes. They are here. I can hear them, scuttling about back there searching for whatever scraps they can find. We must be patient.

    *Nods and smiles an all to wide and toothy grin.*
    *smashes through the wall, and starts moving towards Corban, acting completely Zombie-ish*
    BBBRRAAAAIIIINNNNSSSS!
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    I'm a sometimes lurker if that counts.

    I mean I've posted, just not that often.
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    Suppose I fall into the "lurker" category. Then again when you look like THIS who can blame you?

    Besides, Momma always told me "Forums is the DEVIL!!!"
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    Also forgot to mention that almost everytime I have posted I've been accosted with a can opener. The repair bills are starting to get a little out of hand. :p
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    Kali-fal wrote:
    I'm a sometimes lurker if that counts.

    I mean I've posted, just not that often.
    Gonkbot wrote: »
    Also forgot to mention that almost everytime I have posted I've been accosted with a can opener. The repair bills are starting to get a little out of hand. :p

    Welcome. Both of you. You'll be happy to know that I've just added no can openers to the list of no-no's at the top of the thread.
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    Kali-fal wrote:
    I'm a sometimes lurker if that counts.

    I mean I've posted, just not that often.

    Same. I don't post nearly as often as some people. I just like lurking I guess, or I just don't have much to say.
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    Well here you can say as liittle or as much as you want.

    *Head back into kitchen to continue preparing the lavish feast he's planned. Realises he needs a can opener.*

    Hmm...
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    Well here you can say as liittle or as much as you want.

    *Head back into kitchen to continue preparing the lavish feast he's planned. Realises he needs a can opener.*

    Hmm...

    An electric chainsaw will get that open lickidy-split.
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    So...is there where we are going to gather the lurkers for my bi-monthly lurker hunt?
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    *Tosses the rock aside a crawls out suspiciously raising his nose to the sky and sniffing the fresh air*

    It seems safe to come out.

    *Hairy stands up and stretches a little.*

    *Sniffs the air again.*

    Baked goods? Mmmm...

    *Strolls over to the couch and sits down. From out of nowhere Hairy pulls out a bottle of kanar and begins to drink.*
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    Ravenstein wrote: »
    So...is there where we are going to gather the lurkers for my bi-monthly lurker hunt?

    :eek:

    Persish the thought!

    Ush-hay about the unt-hay!
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    I have been reading posts here a lot, but iddn't post anything since last year. So...I guess I'll be called that lurker.
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    Don't go in there! Don't let them know you are out here!

    Its all a horrible trap. Run! Run while you still can. Run, I say.

    Soylent Green is people!

    *Runs off screaming*
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    AHHHH it got my leg! I can't run away. I have to post becuase I'm ensnared in the trap already.
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    AHHHH it got my leg! I can't run away. I have to post becuase I'm ensnared in the trap already.
    *clings to leg with both hands*
    Ususual poster....the smell of untainted intentions....you must be new here!
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    *dislodges Dawson from TrekGuy* Quick, run.... I'll hold them off!!! COME GET SOME!!!

    *starts spraying hot lead at the hordes of 10 Forward as he looks back to TrekGuy* Tell my wife I love her....

    *waddles off into the oncoming swarm, barrels blazing; his voice trailing off as he goes* Here's some for you... and you... don't think I've forgotten about you...
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    *Pops up behind Gonkbot with a tray of sandwiches in one hand. Hits Gonks reset button. Removes the ammunition belt from Gonks gun.*

    Now now now. Have some batteries Gonk and settle down. Dawson is harmless. This is not some attempt to turn you all into a lavish feast.

    *Holds up cook book.*

    See, its says "To Serve Lurkers."

    Now, enjoy these sandwiches and our Sunday movie feature!

    *Turns on the TV.*

    What'll everyone have to drink? I've got a fully stocked bar and garage. :D
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    Gonkbot wrote: »
    *dislodges Dawson from TrekGuy* Quick, run.... I'll hold them off!!! COME GET SOME!!!

    *starts spraying hot lead at the hordes of 10 Forward as he looks back to TrekGuy* Tell my wife I love her....
    LEAD! *begins drinking it*
    Now now now. Have some batteries Gonk and settle down. Dawson is harmless. This is not some attempt to turn you all into a lavish feast.
    *looks up from drinking the liquid lead and keels over*
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    MGDawson wrote: »
    LEAD! *begins drinking it*

    *looks up from drinking the liquid lead and keels over*

    Why? Why drink lead?

    HOW? How drink lead from gun?

    *Takes hat off head for a moment, then tosses a blanket over Dawson. Shakes his head in confusion, then hobbles over to the couch, sits down to watch Trekkies and has some popcorn.*

    OH! I love this part!

    *Laughs heartily.*
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    Why? Why drink lead?

    HOW? How drink lead from gun?

    *Takes hat off head for a moment, then tosses a blanket over Dawson. Shakes his head in confusion, then hobbles over to the couch*
    *hops out from under the blanket, nose twitching*
    That's why I drank the lead. :p
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    Okay, good. Now frollick and do cute things. I think he lurkers have been scared off. Trying to get them back will be difficult.

    I'd better go make a bunch of cinnabons. Oh and lets order some more Kanar.

    *Stumps off to the kitchen.*
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    Why? Why drink lead?

    HOW? How drink lead from gun?

    Well for starters you need to trick them somehow. I suggest telling them the gun is actually ice cream.
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    *rolls over making little squeaks*

    cute enough?
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    Ravenstein wrote: »
    Well for starters you need to trick them somehow. I suggest telling them the gun is actually ice cream.

    *Pulls a note pad and quill pen out of his jacket. Makes a note on his pad.*
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    I just lurk on the foru... ooh Bacon!
  • Archived PostArchived Post Member Posts: 2,264,498 Arc User
    edited March 2011
    I'm seeing a lot of "lurkers" being listed as Senior Members. So does it only take ten posts to be considered a senior member around here?
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