Hard to make "Real" friends in PWI now?

_Ink_ - Raging Tide wrote: »

Duke is sodding evil. But, yes, that's how I have my chats set up. What I was saying was that it would be nice if I could just make a separate chat and instead of having people in the guild talking to me and all the people whispering me, I could just go "Here, come to this chat" and have us all in one place instead of clicking to squad to talk there, guild to talk in guild and clicking names to respond to whispers. I was just talking about a matter of convenience. Not that it would ever go that smoothly, but one can dream.

I think if they ever tried to implement something like that they would somehow end up disabling chat completely.


Except for duke blacke.

no its not HARD to make real friends in pwi.
Its just that real friends are the real jewels; you dont obtain them that easily.
And if u think u can, wake up and smell the coffee.
even in RL classes, if u had 30 classmates; then 20 were your casual friends. Out of that 5-10 close friends, 1-2 best friends.

It's extremely close to impossible to make Real Friends in Real life.. LET ALONE in a freaking ONLINE game of any kind .. dont bb:cutee an idiot.. dont be a freaking freaking idiot.. PLEASE.. please.. Im actually begging you.. please..

Jadsia - Lost City wrote: »

I wouldn't want a friend's list full of r9s. I want a friend's list full of others who just enjoy playing the game. My FL has level 1 to 102 players and we all usually 'play our own game' if you know what I mean. Every once in awhile I'll quest or run HH for and with them. Now looking at your quote this may be incredibly illogical that I have a FL like that. Well, they're there because we have a social connection apart from the game. Some on my FL talk to me once every 2 to 3 months, others every day. I wouldn't want a FL full of folks that are always trying to drag me off into this instance or that event. Like I said, my friends and I all have our own game to play.

I have people of mediocre and below gear on my friend list. But thats not saying that my archer would make friends with them. I am not going to fill my list with people who I never interact with. There are only three types of people on my friend list.

1. People who don't want anything from me.
2. People of +10 or greater refines.
3. People who I know in real life.

Once in a while I'll get someone who I spent time charm tanking (many) bosses for them for free. And they'll refuse to help me with something I need unless I offer them something in return. Yea... those are the people who gets deleted or ignored from any and all future aid requests. I pay my debts... those who help me will get my help in return.

Jadsia - Lost City wrote: »

I have r8 gear. I rather buy myself a house or a fishing boat than pay for r9 gears myself but that's just me. I'm going to work on getting the most out of what I already have.

With the price of r9 these days... thats going to be a pretty sad house that you plan to live in. I don't know about you, but most people tend to enjoy the finer things in life... like running water. Or in the case of the boat... one that is not made of rubber.

Kiyoshi - Heavens Tear wrote: »

I am not going to fill my list with people who I never interact with.

Some of the folk on my FL have been there for years. Sure they go play another MMORPG for awhile but they pop in from time to time to stay in touch.


With the price of r9 these days... thats going to be a pretty sad house that you plan to live in. I don't know about you, but most people tend to enjoy the finer things in life... like running water. Or in the case of the boat... one that is not made of rubber.

Thanks for the elitist bash. Ever hear of the term 'down payment'? Why pay rent when I can make mortgage payments. I've got my eye on a 3 bed, 2 bath house on 8 acres in the country for $50K. It's a foreclosure and I can get it with 3% down. That's what? $1500.00. Oh nevermind about that though. I'm prioritizing what I want to do with my money. And yes, real world priorities trump virtual ones. Nothing ever wrong with that.

To each their own, dude.

1) There are far less people playing.
2) There are far less new users.
3) People that have been playing for a while have their own cliques.

1 + 2 + 3 = more difficult time making new friends.

Jay_Dubbz - Lost City wrote: »

Most of which is a result of bad choices on pwe's part

Not necessarily for me Jay, its cause college studies are killing me lol >.< Sorry I'm not on as often, but I still consider you as 1 of my true, great friends for who you are

Not your toons,

Not your gear/possessions

Not your guild

Just plain you ^^. We had real fun as low lvls growing up and everything, and not even endgame changes that!

Lurani - Raging Tide wrote: »

In my case it's hard to find people who i have similar interests with, or people who talk about something rather then the game...yeah i play the game...i know wtf is going on around the game i don't feel like sitting there only talking about what i'm doing on the game...that's rather dull. Also hard to find people who aren't users in the game. Personally atm i talk to no one and just stick to being a loner at best then having idiotic convos or getting dragged into helping people non stop and killing pots over nothing. b:lipcurl

If you ever want someone to talk to, feel free to message me in game. I'm all for talking to anyone that has at least half of their brain left that hasn't been eaten away by QQ madness or WC drama wars. b:chuckle

Jay_Dubbz - Lost City wrote: »

I dunno about everyone else but it seems to me that its like impossible to find any good friends on pwi lately, or maybe its just my server lol?

It just seems like before pwi became a frosty hyper stone 5aps nirvana fest, that its was easier to make some good friends. You would meet some pretty cool people out there questing and doing rb for exp.

Now it just seems like the only friends i make are people ive ran frost or nirvana with. And those are just friends that pm you asking you to come to nirvana or bh lol

Ima cleric so my friends list is always full, i'm constanly deleting and adding ppl but ive only have like 5 "real" friends that arent frost, nirvana, bh buddies lol

It is not impossible; however, it is hard to find "real friends" anywhere...even outside "cyberspace"...I mean, if you go for a walk, how many friends do you make that day? Probably NONE! And it is not because you are not a "likable person", it is just because it is so hard to find people willing to be "friendly" or even just willing to have new friends...even your "childhood friends" may not be reliable...I can tell you this: each and every "childhood friend" i had betrayed me at LEAST one time (most of them did it more than once)...It happens since a long time...as long as i can remember...The difference is that i am more "aware" and i am not as naive as i was...seriously, back then even if one of them STABBED me (i mean it literally) i would just think "he/she is my friend..." god! i even feel pity and even a little bit of despise for my old self...thank god i changed!
Don't get me wrong; I am still a great ally to have, but i'm not so "soft" as i used to be...i won't think of someone as my "friend" easily...friendship takes time, effort, love, mutual help, gestures...you can't ask for a "lifetime friendship" with someone who you met last week. I like to help my friends, but how should i know who my "friends" are? There are 2 types of people who distrust others: The ones who are not trustworthy and the ones who have been betrayed too many times...

Deceptistar - Sanctuary wrote: »

no its not HARD to make real friends in pwi.
Its just that real friends are the real jewels; you dont obtain them that easily.
And if u think u can, wake up and smell the coffee.
even in RL classes, if u had 30 classmates; then 20 were your casual friends. Out of that 5-10 close friends, 1-2 best friends.

Eh? you had that much friends on a class? wow!
I think that for most people it is more like:
on a 30 students class, 5~8 "dislike" you, 15~19 are "neutrals" who don't like nor dislike you, ~2 are people who you sympathize with, ~5 are "peers" who you won't even speak with on the following year (most likely), ~1~2 are potential friends, 0.5 is the person who is your friend (doesn't happen in every class you get).

Deceptistar - Sanctuary wrote: »

no its not HARD to make real friends in pwi.
Its just that real friends are the real jewels; you dont obtain them that easily.
And if u think u can, wake up and smell the coffee.
even in RL classes, if u had 30 classmates; then 20 were your casual friends. Out of that 5-10 close friends, 1-2 best friends.

*A thousand times approved*

Being acquaintances in a MMO is quite peculiar by the way. By choosing a server and not another and connecting at certain times or being at certain places can make you meet all kinds of people, good or bad, or between the two (or nothing) and not others (but forums enlarge this spectrum).
It is also how you relate to people and how they do with you. Commitment is another step as well.

This is all like reality, except for a few factors... You interact by the help of an avatar and can pretend being someone else (I am sure many trolls are not so bad in reality, or then, well, I would not want to know them better given how they introduce themselves, even if it's a joke, perhaps?). The rest is all about circumstances stated above.

After that, having friends is all about sharing qualities and views on things, degree of quality in relationship may vary, by the way.

True friends are the rarest, obviously. They don't act with greed (the latter concept which is mostly hidden, hitting you all of a sudden) or would leave you in the dust for a petty reason, they are here for you, you can count on them always and they seek the same.

As many (most?) people in MMOs want to reach the top fast, there is the risk that some will do it without any morals, even if it includes backstabbing and scamming others. It's quite revolting and disheartening to say the least, in my opinion. And then, like if that was not enough, they say 'it's a game, and you lost'. Do you play games to be frustrated? Not me.

And for me, absolute true friends coming from MMOs are not just interacting within the game alone, but also outside of it (instant messaging, e-mails and so on). They will share part of their lives with you and you as well, without any fear or trickery.

I know select people I have learned to truly like, accept and help to the point I consider them brothers and sisters (I'm a loner. I've never met romance in a game and I don't think it will happen to me -and I am not into lovey-dovey pretentions/acting/whatever else; love is not made to be trifled with, right? I feel it can only develop outside of the game-), but also I learned quite a bit from them too, to say the least. I could not go 'I will be your friend' as an empty promise. It would mean lying to myself and to the other and even more because I grew careful around people, even online.

Thanks for reading, and good luck in your search, Jay.

EliteDemons - Archosaur wrote: »

yeah i know what you mean alot of people add you but never talk or see see you again...Im a barb and alot of people add me but never really talk. I find that alot of people wont add you if your not a very high level my lvl 11 blademaster that i used to have got a few friends then stopped getting them all together. It's the same with dating and then someday getting married on this game. Say your a lvl 13 archer dating a level 11cleric, your having a good time and wanting to get married at level 20 when some lvl 32 barb comes in and she thinks "now i can have a lvl 13 or lvl 32..tough choice!" So she dumps you for the barb. I have to say if it was me i wouldnt be overlly upset as its just a game, but id be annoyed of how people have changed on PW just like any other MMO even RS was cool until the owners got greedy and so did the people.b:angry

Well, if the girl in your example only needed a powerlevel she would indeed choose a higher leveled character. That said, your example is just showing some lack of seriousness from some players. I think you meant in-game bf-gf, not marriage itself, given the price of a marriage pack.
Having short-term friendships is normal in a MMORPG, especially at a low level. It is more likely you could make friends when you join a faction or when you get in instances, or get in a team to beat some boss...

But again, this is not an absolute rule. And don't forget, some people 'befriend' you just to use you a few times then dump you after... Be wary about it.