strange sensation grips player O.O

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BaronSkull - Dreamweaver
BaronSkull - Dreamweaver Posts: 3 Arc User
edited October 2010 in Tideswell (East)
Hello there, I play on Dreamweaver, my main is a blade-master called BaronSkull...I'm sure you've seen me, laying around dead most likely, somewhere before. (or not)...
I have a bit of a problem, which for lack of better term, I now dub "partyphobia". That is, when I get a party invite, a strange feeling of panic strikes me. I usually run off somewhere and log out, just to get rid of the invite notify, (even if I have been sitting around hoping to do the quest).
Yes I'm dreadfully shy, obviously. However, it feels to me, like these online games are where the real energy is, and so I'm trying to get over it. I spent 4 years soloing 1 job to lvl 75 in final fantasy online, while more social people (who partied a lot) did the same thing in as few as 3 months, just to show how crippling it has been. (expensive too >.<)
It's all a bit much to talk about while punching things out in the game and fighting to be heard over the world chat spam, so I thought I'd get it out in the open here.
(I suppose this could also be viewed as an overly-long "Hi I'm new here" type post)
Anyways, if you see some nut called BaronSkull trying to solo something that's going to eat him alive, or hiding behind some rocks, or it takes him 10 minutes to write back "hello"... that would be MY fault....but I'm working on it^^
Post edited by BaronSkull - Dreamweaver on

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  • DeadSound - Lost City
    DeadSound - Lost City Posts: 176 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    Hey Baron, hope you get over your phobia of people. My gf has a similar issue with meeting online strangers. Meeting people online can does usually have good results i assure you.
  • Rillien - Heavens Tear
    Rillien - Heavens Tear Posts: 569 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    It's hard sometimes for shy people to get things done. What I'd suggest, though, is to join a guild, if you're comfortable with trying that. You can just sit back and watch guild chat for as long as you want, get to know your guildmates through observation. And if a topic interest you at any time, you can join in the conversation, make some connections. Usually people don't pressure you to be active in chat; it's totally a personal choice. But that way, if you ever need help, you have people you know that you can ask through there, and you can avoid the random party invites, which can sometimes be intimidating.

    Also, you might find that once you start talking, it gets easier. Communication online usually makes people less shy; I hope this works for you. Good luck.
  • MANray_ - Sanctuary
    MANray_ - Sanctuary Posts: 2,311 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    It's ok man, everyone plays at their own pace and this game has plenty of soloing oportunities. You fortunately seem to have chosen the right class. I would encourage you to try to squad some people however, it really is more fun, and you should try to remember no one will ask anything from you except that you do your squad work. There's always a guy or two that keeps mostly silent in squads i usually party with, other than getting through the first hi, you probably don't have to talk at all until the time comes for you to maybe say thanks when the squad disbands. And don't be afraid to make mistakes, is all right if you noob it up at low-mid levels. I can assure chances are you'll be more annoyed by the mistakes of others, than the squad by yours.

    I think an MMO is certainly a good idea if you're a very shy person as it can certainly help you become more extroverted in a relatively safe environment. Hope you enjoy yourself and that you become one of those shy guys no one is able to shut up once you get to know them.
  • buttercupcruella
    buttercupcruella Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    Shelly, you closed this thread when you shouldn't have. Now you re - opened it, ok. Just 1 problem. If you INSIST on deleting posts b:angry at least EDIT them, not delete them fully. Leave the post. Just edit the content however (not over - edit).

    Also, OP, good luck.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Toxic - Dreamweaver
    Toxic - Dreamweaver Posts: 239 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    buttercupcruella wrote: »
    Shelly, you closed this thread when you shouldn't have. Now you re - opened it, ok. Just 1 problem. If you INSIST on deleting posts b:angry at least EDIT them, not delete them fully. Leave the post. Just edit the content however (not over - edit).

    Also, OP, good luck.

    Agreed. Tired of seeing posts disappear constantly.

    Also @ OP a lot of times on my alt when someone invites me to a squad where I'm questing I say sorry I have to go, and switch to another alt to play for awhile. Or I just afk without clicking the invite button until the person leaves the area. Try joining a faction, it helps.
    <3 Tapout <3
  • ragenight
    ragenight Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    Too much positive reinforcement going on in this thread.

    OP, you're in luck. The game is dying, and soon you'll have the whole map to yourself.

    Good luck.
  • ZAPATON - Sanctuary
    ZAPATON - Sanctuary Posts: 875 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    ragenight wrote: »
    Too much positive reinforcement going on in this thread.

    OP, you're in luck. The game is dying, and soon you'll have the whole map to yourself.

    Good luck.

    All I can say about that

    Dear BaronSkull,

    About your problem, "partyphobia" is quite common in this game. But, it mostly does not happen to others for the same reasons it happens to you, but instead, for the fear of running into a "fail squad" and get killed (in game of course) because of someone else's actions.

    However, your particular case is not that rare either. Just don't worry too much about it. Remember that what matters is that you're having fun, playing the way you like to play, and not the way others tell you to, or tell you "you fail if you don't do this" (unless you like that O_0).

    Have a nice day b:bye
    Madness?

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • JanusZeal - Heavens Tear
    JanusZeal - Heavens Tear Posts: 3,852 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    I'm kinda like you but I used to do it in FF's. If the squad I was in was a complete fail of a squad, and my having a severely short attention span (and high tendency for something synonymous to buyers remorse for FF or Nirvana squads), I would fake DC. It was trickier if I intended to log onto another character on the same account afterwards though, needing to transfer stuff via acct stash. So what I would do is I'd stand still right at a point where they would be pulling mobs, then I'd run out of the screen, when everyone else's attention was focused on the mobs, town port, account stash my ****, then exit the game logging into another character. That's my type of "partyphobia", but a phobia of a fail party and the complete lack of interest being in one.
  • Renza - Raging Tide
    Renza - Raging Tide Posts: 1,939 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    buttercupcruella wrote: »
    Shelly, you closed this thread when you shouldn't have. Now you re - opened it, ok. Just 1 problem. If you INSIST on deleting posts b:angry at least EDIT them, not delete them fully. Leave the post. Just edit the content however (not over - edit).

    now thats just stupid, some of us that complained about this thread being closed even said to delete, why edit there stupid posts? when all they did was trollpost and get a +1 post count they dont deserve, u saying they deserve the +1 post count for "they see me trollin", how bout no and get out, thanks, so i say thanks shelly for deleting there daft un-needed posts, im not saying delete all daft un-needed posts...but still.

    to the OP though, you shudnt need worry about it to much, im sure theres thousands of others like you, i remember when i 1st started on mmos, i was shy for a couple odd months before i could get into playing properly, i mentioned in the thread to *why was this one closed* about a cousin of mine who is possibly like you in terms of shyness, you will get over it eventualy (hopefully) and be able to experience games properly.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    "Kantorek: we hope to see the economy in PWI come back "down to earth" if you will."
    *One week later*
    "Frankieraye: Lucky Corals and Platinum Charms are going to be in the Boutique indefinitely."
    *few months later, PWI puts rank8/9 into the CS insanely cheap, raising gold 1mill+*
  • Sirrobert - Dreamweaver
    Sirrobert - Dreamweaver Posts: 3,395 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    Well the good thing about an online game is that, while you talk to people, it's not YOU who is talking to the people. It's your avatar.
    I think that view on the game should help alot when your shy.

    Other than that, you are going to have to squad up with people one day, if you want to get further. TT runs for gear, FB runs to get your culti done, super strong bosses you can't do without help.

    Also try join a faction. You can just sit back and watch faction chat roll through, or even close faction chat if you don't want to see it. Just remember to stay abit active, or they'll think your inactive and might evantually kick you. (it's also a great way to get to know people on your own time).
    I would suggest you join a smal faction, not great to get help, but a semi empty fac chat might be better for you.

    Hope ya enjoy the game
    9 out of 10 voices in my head say I'm not crazy... the 10th is singing the music of tetris
  • Katzyn - Sanctuary
    Katzyn - Sanctuary Posts: 1,270 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    I agree with Sirrobert - a small faction would probably do a lot of good for you.

    Maybe try to meet someone around your level, and become friends. Having a friend around when you're meeting/working with a bunch of new people can always help.
    Katzyn, level 101 Demon Veno
    Kylenea, level 99 Demon Cleric
    ForestSonata, level 6x Mystic
    Proud wifeh of Yudai <3
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    ~Courtesy of the amazing Forsakenx~
  • SashaGray - Heavens Tear
    SashaGray - Heavens Tear Posts: 3,765 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    what possible reason is there for moving this to the dreamweaver sub forum, aside from the player saying he plays on dreamweaver.

    did the person moving the thread read what the OP said, or just saw the name of a server and knee-jerked it over to a subforum.

    Player on all server can have anxiety.

    so let me help you out

    Archosaur, Heaven's Tear, Harshlands, Lost City, Raging Tide, Sanctuary

    there, now that all servers have been mentioned, this thread can be moved to where it belongs. b:bye
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Lenore - Harshlands
    Lenore - Harshlands Posts: 1,201 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    Great job ChaoticSmelly, you moved the topic to DWP forums. NORMALLY that would be fine because there would be a shadow link or whatever, but with fifty billion moved or locked topics, how do you expect someone new to the forums to find this?

    I give you credit for reopening topic. You fail by, again, OVERMODDING.
  • chaoticshelly
    chaoticshelly Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    I certainly reopened the topic but I didn't move it. There are other moderators here other than me b:thanks
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  • Andres - Dreamweaver
    Andres - Dreamweaver Posts: 462 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    what is this I don't even...
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  • Lenore - Harshlands
    Lenore - Harshlands Posts: 1,201 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    ChaoticShelly wrote: »
    I certainly reopened the topic but I didn't move it. There are other moderators here other than me b:thanks

    Sorry for pointing fingers at the wrong person.

    Whoever moved this topic, I facepalm epically in your general direction.
  • Teppeii - Dreamweaver
    Teppeii - Dreamweaver Posts: 1,206 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    Adderall.
    On indefinite hiatus :3
  • Toxic - Dreamweaver
    Toxic - Dreamweaver Posts: 239 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    ChaoticShelly wrote: »
    I certainly reopened the topic but I didn't move it. There are other moderators here other than me b:thanks

    Yeah, let's just giggle over it and then not move it where it belongs since it has nothing to do with DW except the OP plays here.

    I swear everytime I see you post I can't help but want to bash my keyboard into my face. Try losing some of the "I'm better than all of you b:thanks" attitude FFS.
    <3 Tapout <3
  • Tricannon - Dreamweaver
    Tricannon - Dreamweaver Posts: 337 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    meh not much i can say other than maybe try joining a guild around ur lvl to start off with. good static group of ppl that u can take small steps with and possibly form parties with. as for random party invites i tend to ignore them and say i perfer to solo for more exp/coin. just ignore if they keep pestering u
    If I sound like I hate you, please don't take it personally...chances are I actually do.
  • Sirrobert - Dreamweaver
    Sirrobert - Dreamweaver Posts: 3,395 Arc User
    edited October 2010
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    ChaoticShelly wrote: »
    I certainly reopened the topic but I didn't move it. There are other moderators here other than me b:thanks

    And than, when you accept that it should not have been moved, you could ofcourse actually move it back to where it belongs.

    But on the other hand you can also simply make it know that you know it doesn't belong here, and let everyone see how you do nothing about it
    9 out of 10 voices in my head say I'm not crazy... the 10th is singing the music of tetris

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