The Three Laws of Clerichood

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Narn_Taborin - Dreamweaver
Narn_Taborin - Dreamweaver Posts: 27 Arc User
edited April 2010 in Cleric
I shared this with my faction months ago, and they thought it was funny, so I've finally decided to share it with you all. It's just a bit of fun, and for those of you familiar with a certain science fiction writer (or even a couple of films based on his work), these might sound somewhat familiar - hope you enjoy them b:pleased

The Three Laws of Clerichood

First Law:
A Cleric will always do everything possible to keep themselves alive.

Second Law:
A Cleric will always do everything possible to keep the tank alive, as long as doing so does not conflict with the first law.

Third Law:
A Cleric will revive, buff and heal allies, debuff and damage deal against enemies, as long as doing so does not conflict with the first or second laws.

Like I said, just a bit of fun based on three slightly more famous laws, but it also accurately describes how I play my cleric b:laugh
Wizard's First Rule:

People are stupid; given proper motivation, almost anyone will believe almost anything. Because people are stupid, they will believe a lie because they want to believe it's true, or because they are afraid it might be true.

Cleric's First Rule:

Those who die through their own stupidity, goes to town. 'Nuff said.
Post edited by Narn_Taborin - Dreamweaver on

Comments

  • Hthor - Dreamweaver
    Hthor - Dreamweaver Posts: 9 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    That's beautiful, it's not ALWAYS true, but the vast majority of the time I think that's very well stated :P.
  • Sylredrae - Sanctuary
    Sylredrae - Sanctuary Posts: 209 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    Narn_Taborin - Dreamweaver wrote: »
    I shared this with my faction months ago, and they thought it was funny, so I've finally decided to share it with you all. It's just a bit of fun, and for those of you familiar with a certain science fiction writer (or even a couple of films based on his work), these might sound somewhat familiar - hope you enjoy them b:pleased

    The Three Laws of Clerichood

    First Law:
    A Cleric will always do everything possible to keep themselves alive.

    Second Law:
    A Cleric will always do everything possible to keep the tank alive, as long as doing so does not conflict with the first law.

    Third Law:
    A Cleric will revive, buff and heal allies, debuff and damage deal against enemies, as long as doing so does not conflict with the first or second laws.

    Like I said, just a bit of fun based on three slightly more famous laws, but it also accurately describes how I play my cleric b:laugh


    LOL! Oh dear...

    You've just described my playing style in squads in a nutshell! b:victory

    Not always true, but that's how it usually works with me. ^^
    Syredrae ~ lvl 100 Cleric (main character)

    Auryl ~ lvl 100 Venomancer

    Mainas ~ lvl 80 Barbarian

    Suirune ~ lvl 2X Psychic
  • Aadi - Lost City
    Aadi - Lost City Posts: 4,449 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    I get angry with clerics who disobey the third law. b:surrender I often find myself ranting about it to people, haha.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    "aadi is a forum ninja, always there, skirting thru the shadows... striking with quick posts while you are distracted by your own" -Alexeno(kin)
    "We talk about you because you're fab. b:cute" -Chillum
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  • Jlora - Sanctuary
    Jlora - Sanctuary Posts: 50 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    jajajajaja Irobot!!!
  • DoomKaiser - Harshlands
    DoomKaiser - Harshlands Posts: 155 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    4th rule of cleric. Spam me for buffs and you shall receive one via tempest

    5th If u want me to have demon or sage buff so badly then buy it for me.
    Your lose of exp doesnt help me.

    6th stop calling me a EP. Or next time you need healing i will just pray for you.
    Your doubt is our powerb:thanks
  • MagicHamsta - Lost City
    MagicHamsta - Lost City Posts: 10,466 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    me can has Isaac Asimov?
    b:pleased
    we has implemented his laws as they be stated before in our robots.......didn't work out 100% perfectly
    Dx
    darthpanda16: Firefox crashed on me. Aryannamage: I don't think I am a GM that would be new.
    Hawk:Do this. closing thread
    frankieraye: I'll see if we can replace the woman with a stick figure and the tiger fangs with marshmallows.//Issues like these need to get escalated quickly to minimize the damage.
    Kantorek: Yeah.. you should try it. It's awesome.
    Sihndra: Nope- not currently possible under any circumstances. Sorry.
    LokisDottir: I mean...not haunting the forums, nope nope..
    Konariraiden: You don't know what you are up against. You will lose.
    Waiting for...Hamster Packs!
    58% chance to get tokens
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    1% chance to get ban hamstered with the message "Hamsters United!"
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Thistle_grey - Sanctuary
    Thistle_grey - Sanctuary Posts: 91 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    Brilliant!
    "Imagination is more important than intelligence."
  • Shealu - Heavens Tear
    Shealu - Heavens Tear Posts: 189 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    DoomKaiser - Harshlands wrote: »
    4th rule of cleric. Spam me for buffs and you shall receive one via tempest

    5th If u want me to have demon or sage buff so badly then buy it for me.
    Your lose of exp doesnt help me.

    6th stop calling me a EP. Or next time you need healing i will just pray for you.

    Hey i like the 6th law ROFL
  • Ahira - Lost City
    Ahira - Lost City Posts: 791 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    Narn_Taborin - Dreamweaver wrote: »
    I shared this with my faction months ago, and they thought it was funny, so I've finally decided to share it with you all. It's just a bit of fun, and for those of you familiar with a certain science fiction writer (or even a couple of films based on his work), these might sound somewhat familiar - hope you enjoy them b:pleased

    The Three Laws of Clerichood

    First Law:
    A Cleric will always do everything possible to keep themselves alive.

    Second Law:
    A Cleric will always do everything possible to keep the tank alive, as long as doing so does not conflict with the first law.

    Third Law:
    A Cleric will revive, buff and heal allies, debuff and damage deal against enemies, as long as doing so does not conflict with the first or second laws.

    Like I said, just a bit of fun based on three slightly more famous laws, but it also accurately describes how I play my cleric b:laugh

    b:chuckle

    I'd change the 3rd law slightly tho! =x

    My Forth Law would be:
    A Cleric will use as little mana as they can get away with, as long as doing so does not conflict with the first, second or third laws.

    Fifth Law:
    A Cleric will debuff and damage deal against enemies only after being asked by several members of party multiple times, as long as doing so does not conflict with the first, second or third laws!
    --Retired--

    Factions: Forbiden, Genesis, Conqueror, BloodLust, Zen, Spectral
    Active October 2008- August 2009; Semi-active- May 2010
  • AeonieX - Heavens Tear
    AeonieX - Heavens Tear Posts: 158 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    Haha sounds about right for way Clerics should play. :)
    AeonieX - Hybrid Vit Veno 6x
    HarmieX - Pure Mag Psychic 6x
    KyraneiX - Axe/Fist BM 4x
    KyranthoX - Axe Barb 2x
    KyyranthoX - Hybrid Cleric 2x
    AskariX - Pure Dex Assassin 2x
    KyraneiiX - Pure Dex Archer 0x
    AeoniiX - Pure Mag Wizard 0x
  • Cailleach - Harshlands
    Cailleach - Harshlands Posts: 11 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    I like it, though I don't know what Asimov would think of it.

    I think you left out the Zeroth law though:
    A cleric will always do everything possible to ensure the success of the squad.

    This can, and should, override the first law, as ultimately the entire point of the cleric is so that the squad can succeed. Of course, 99.9% of the time, success is intimately linked with the cleric remaining alive.
  • Picky - Lost City
    Picky - Lost City Posts: 53 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    DoomKaiser - Harshlands wrote: »
    4th rule of cleric. Spam me for buffs and you shall receive one via tempest

    5th If u want me to have demon or sage buff so badly then buy it for me.
    Your lose of exp doesnt help me.

    6th stop calling me a EP. Or next time you need healing i will just pray for you.

    b:chuckleb:pleased I like I like I like!
  • Deceptistar - Sanctuary
    Deceptistar - Sanctuary Posts: 10,454 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    DoomKaiser - Harshlands wrote: »
    4th rule of cleric. Spam me for buffs and you shall receive one via tempest

    5th If u want me to have demon or sage buff so badly then buy it for me.
    Your lose of exp doesnt help me.

    6th stop calling me a EP. Or next time you need healing i will just pray for you.
    perfect lol
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  • DoomKaiser - Harshlands
    DoomKaiser - Harshlands Posts: 155 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    Deceptistar - Sanctuary wrote: »
    perfect lol

    thank you. i think i should start a documentary titled "a day in the shoes of Doom" to show people how annoying it is for us clerics and how even the simplest tasks get interrupted by other peoples crazy requests.

    a few days ago someone asked me to drop from nirvana squad to go RB for them. Idk i am a pretty mean cleric on my server. Requests like that make me feel like i am not doing a proper jobb:cry
    Your doubt is our powerb:thanks
  • Skybelle - Sanctuary
    Skybelle - Sanctuary Posts: 595 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    Ahira - Lost City wrote: »
    My Forth Law would be:
    A Cleric will use as little mana as they can get away with, as long as doing so does not conflict with the first, second or third laws.

    ^ This is true.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    my C H A R A C T E R S ; feel free to message me in game.
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  • Curls - Sanctuary
    Curls - Sanctuary Posts: 9 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    This is so true. I will only use what mana I absolutely have to use.b:laughb:laughb:laugh
  • Kanisha - Lost City
    Kanisha - Lost City Posts: 6 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    Narn, Doom you two are briliant i wish i had thought of those laws b4. hope u dont mind i think im gonna quote all 6 laws during game play rofl.
  • Engeli - Sanctuary
    Engeli - Sanctuary Posts: 109 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    so true haha ;P
  • Aydamn - Lost City
    Aydamn - Lost City Posts: 112 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    Change "the tank" in rule two to "the party" and add in Ahira's fourth law and we're good.
    Saying that, I'll deal damage against mobs in instances to speed it up a tonne.
  • Candie - Raging Tide
    Candie - Raging Tide Posts: 83 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    Holy Path theory (by barbs) : always assume cleric doesn't have holy path/genie energy when you pull large number of mobs
  • MystiMonk - Sanctuary
    MystiMonk - Sanctuary Posts: 4,286 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    ^.Yes.I agree with the above.
    Looking for a decent casual understanding Faction.
  • Roseary - Sanctuary
    Roseary - Sanctuary Posts: 978 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    Ahira - Lost City wrote: »
    My Forth Law would be:
    A Cleric will use as little mana as they can get away with, as long as doing so does not conflict with the first, second or third laws.

    This would be my third law, MP regen + Stacking IH + Meditation = No MP pot consumtion. People complain, but they're not paying for my pots.. are they.. Nor is anyone dead or dieing
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • LaTrappe - Lost City
    LaTrappe - Lost City Posts: 107 Arc User
    edited April 2010
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    **** the Laws I have money.

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