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Looking For Reviews on my First Foundry

akweteakwete Member Posts: 13 Arc User
edited July 2014 in Foundry Quest Database
Hi! As the title says, I'm looking for reviews on my first foundry to get it out of beta stage.

It should be quite short, between 16 and 25 minutes depending on how fast you read... or if you skip the text altogether. I'm willing to trade reviews for similarly short Foundries, of course! Just give me your code.

It's called 'Part 1: Humble Pie', you can search for it via @akwete in the 'for review' tab. It's the first part of a short campaign I intend to finish after I have a shot at the Cult contest. The campaign's code is NWS-DLVDKUHRJ - For some reason, I can't seem to look up the quest alone, it only shows up when I search the campaign code.


If you have any advice you could share about it here, please do! I'm always looking to improve, especially since I'm just starting! And I may yet make changes to this quest based on your input.
(And is there a way to stop that disappearing encounters bug from occurring? You know the one, you place an encounter, and it show up fine in subsequent 3Dedit mode checks, but not in preview play-throughs or in the final publication).


Thanks for looking!
Post edited by akwete on

Comments

  • vephidvephid Member Posts: 50
    edited July 2014
    I'm always up for a trade!

    The map is well made and the plot is interesting, I'm looking forward for more! The only thing I can think about is to fix that "Alrica Fenta 1", besides that, a great quest overall!

    The bathing Kobold was quite funny!
    Check out my campaign "A time of need" NWS-DK9TIAT7J! I'm still seeking and trading reviews, feel free to send me a message with your foundry code and I will play them as soon as possible.
  • akweteakwete Member Posts: 13 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Thank you! Oh man, I left an 'Alrica Fenta 1' in there? Haha, whoops! I thought I'd renamed them all back but I must have missed one, thanks for bringing it to my attention. Fixed that now, and a couple of other small bits. And thanks for the generous tip too!

    I made a start on your campaign, good solid undead fun in bite-sized pieces! I liked your companion, and the body burning at the end was a nice touch. Definitely gonna do the rest of the campaign for my next dailies!
  • libraryannelibraryanne Member Posts: 9 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Great job! :) This one actually has some things in common (plot-wise) to my first foundry quest, "Tunnel Fever." Of course, mine takes a little longer to get started and has more loading screens... I didn't realize that sort of thing bothered people until now. :rolleyes: Oh well.

    The main thing I noticed while playing "Humble Pie" is that in the last quest objective you accidentally typed "clime" instead of "climb."

    Also, at one point, there were two Alricas: one following me and one I had to talk to.

    Other than that, it was really enjoyable. Please let me know what you think of "Tunnel Fever" (NW-DQ2882NGW, it's currently in beta). Thanks!
    My Foundry Quests
    1.) Tunnel Fever: NW-DQ2882NGW
  • akweteakwete Member Posts: 13 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Thank you, and nice work! I see what you mean about the similarities, hehe. I loved the gnoll tourists! And I'm glad we could find out that Theraniel and Gladys were alright afterwards =3 The only fault I could spot was a typo; your drider says 'scruptious' instead of (presumably) 'scrumptious'. I gotta admit, I found the random red dragonlings a little odd and out of place from a story standpoint, but still fun (Heck, who doesn't love dragons?). Thank you for the review, and good luck ^_^
  • libraryannelibraryanne Member Posts: 9 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Thanks again. I'm glad you liked it, and I'll fix that typo.

    As for the dragons, I guess I included them because Mt. Bahamut is named after the god of good dragons, and I figured some bad dragons might want to get in on a plan to invade it. *shrugs* Plus, I like dragons. ;)

    P.S. My original plan was to include some captured gold dragon hatchlings, but the foundry doesn't have anything that remotely resembles a gold dragon. The least they could have done was let us recolor the dragonling model, but whatevs... :(
    My Foundry Quests
    1.) Tunnel Fever: NW-DQ2882NGW
  • jenazulajenazula Member Posts: 14 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Beautiful map. I just love the otherworldly atmosphere and the little details.

    A few technical things I noticed - at one point I had two Alricas next to me. It was right after the talking to the kobold child and before I climbed the vine. Also, when I was going to the far back of the cave to gather the 3rd set of mushrooms some of the room ambiances changed abruptly. Since the rooms are all similar visually, the change of sound was jarring.

    I like how you tied in the upcoming Dragon events into the quest, and I learned something new about kobolds! Feel bad about disturbing the guy's bath!

    Good story and good writing.

    If you have time, I would appreciate it if you could run through "Your First Adventure" by jenazula. It still needs a few more to get out of beta.
  • akweteakwete Member Posts: 13 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    @Librayanne: - Ahhh, yes! It was set in Mt. Bahamut, I remember read that! I see the link now. And besides, I'll take any excuse for dragons ^_~ <3 It's a shame about the limited colour availability - my other foundry-in-progress features black dragon wyrmlings. I've just labeled the red dragon models as 'black dragon wyrmlings' and put them in a badly lit room, hahaha ^^;; But yeah, I was surprised there wasn't at least a colour-palette slider like we have for humanoid NPC complexions, that would have sufficed. Oh well, gotta make do.
    I forgot to mention in my last response, thanks for the constructive input! I've fixed them now, ta for letting me know!



    @jenazula: - Nice quick fun =3 I cracked a grin when I turned a corner, and suddenly was presented with thriller-dancing Battlewight, hehe!
    Admittedly, I was a little baffled by the teleporters and chests everywhere, but it didn't detract too much, and I didn't see any typos or errors at all.
    I love Intellect Eaters, so the riddler was a nice surprise. As a quick dungeon run, it was fun and stress-free. And I can never get enough of goblin quests either, so that was nice! Thanks a lot for the kind words and helpful crits too! Very appreciated! I've fixed what I can (Alrica), but the only sound change I've got near the third mushroom is a small waterfall sound effect, so I'm guessing it was a random play-through bug.

    The map is gnarlroot caves; I had fun playing about with it, nearly ran out of the allotted detail count trying to turn the corrupted vines into a more verdant and somewhat watery location.
  • libraryannelibraryanne Member Posts: 9 Arc User
    edited July 2014
    Ha, ha! Well, I look forward to seeing those wyrmlings once you're done with your quest. :)
    My Foundry Quests
    1.) Tunnel Fever: NW-DQ2882NGW
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