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2 Ready for Review trade
say1o
Member Posts: 111 Bounty Hunter
This first one has been up a while and a few of you have already reviewed it. I think now it is ready for the masses. Or labeled done for now. Both of these quests are from the Grey Society, a job giving organization. A job is offered, and you have optional ways to complete.
Grey Society Introduction NW-DPCKXGHQ7 by @say1o Special thanks to Eldarth and Antonkyle in the making of this. Something explodes just for them.
This second one is also my second full build. It needs some good testing for its options. There is some books in the very beginning I still have to proof. One specific map I still need to add a few decorations too, might not notice. But all in all, it needs bug testing for the optional paths, animations consistent, combat ok? There is one Drunk NPC with extra H's and S's to push the over acting of drunk.
Following the Grey Society 2 NW-DJWB79NPA
One option is easier if you use a trickster.
Only plot items attached to the goals are carried over from map to map. You may find some useless things. Like sugar. But in case you have coffee. I provided it.
I need a break from the Foundry and am willing to trade reviews, even if you have already helped me with these. Even if you don't have time to review, I got time to run yours.
Grey Society Introduction NW-DPCKXGHQ7 by @say1o Special thanks to Eldarth and Antonkyle in the making of this. Something explodes just for them.
This second one is also my second full build. It needs some good testing for its options. There is some books in the very beginning I still have to proof. One specific map I still need to add a few decorations too, might not notice. But all in all, it needs bug testing for the optional paths, animations consistent, combat ok? There is one Drunk NPC with extra H's and S's to push the over acting of drunk.
Following the Grey Society 2 NW-DJWB79NPA
One option is easier if you use a trickster.
Only plot items attached to the goals are carried over from map to map. You may find some useless things. Like sugar. But in case you have coffee. I provided it.
I need a break from the Foundry and am willing to trade reviews, even if you have already helped me with these. Even if you don't have time to review, I got time to run yours.
Post edited by say1o on
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Comments
here are my thoughts on the first part:
After exiting the caves:
now going on the second part
If you have other ideas on this portion of the quest PM me.
No light source? Sure there is, that is some Chlorox bleached white sheet there. It glows its so white! I hate it too, part of the object itself. Where did the blood go? Should be blood on it. I will find some other POS to stick there.
How may times did you try the lever? I make it open, close, open, then spawn a working one for you to use manually if you want to still play with a door. I only have sound for the first time. Any more uses and your just trying to break my shiny lever.
On the return I point out that you had the option to help 1 or both(3 options) via the objective. Had you not had the plot item all you say to Logan is "spare a coin?" If you were helping him you should respond, yes I am still helping you. I can add a (only use if not helping him) with the spare a coin. You expected a funny option.
Two trains of dialog deal with helping Logan. I will make sure I have both stating the same thing. Helping Logan allows Logan to do your work for you with what ends up happening.
as for logan and the millwrighter - i understand now, but it was a big confusing since i got the sword for one and cleaned the dungeon for the other and they both were unsatisfied in the end after i said the wrong thing haha xD
I will find something special to replace the white sheet rubble with.
Those lever's are not cheap! A threeway switch was like asking for Orc eggs.
Also a suggestion: you could move it to the counter on the right side of the bed, makes it easier to interact with the tiny table and will maybe look better?
The "ahve" and a missing "a" before "drunken"
and that's all my bickering
and now for the cherrish: it was really great, i rly enjoyed how u made the characters think and react more realistically.
The multiple events were awesome and the majority of intractable items is refreshing.
Also using the error for shorter interaction messages is a really nice trick, haha, can I steal it for some of my future foundries? XD
At first i frowned a bit at the "impossible love" thing, but it worked out generally ok ^^
And the overall idea of a guild giving you quests is really nice.
voted 5 ^^
I will fill the meeting hall with some of my guildmates now that I am in one. If you saw, Opinvu is there, my character. There was one useless plot item that became very useful, if spent enough time in the kitchen.
the kitchen in the party or in the hall?
the kitchen in the party was really hilarious with the fire scene haha =D
and yeah that seems like a nice touch haha, honor your guildmates! and I did not notice that :O you stealthy
Willing to trade reviews. Hopefully there isn't really anything left to fix in these above.
My joke quest Doomsday is getting more plays and reviews than my serious good work.
There were a lot of NPCs that basically seemd to just say they didn't feel like talking to us, not in those words. Seemed pointless to have so many NPCs that had nothing to add.
In the sewers, there were 2 spiketraps right next to each other, no space between them. Right outside the door of the room with the control panel. The problem is, I ran right over them, and was on top of both. So when one spike trap's root ended, the other's took hold, meaning you can't move off of the traps, ever. So, you have to sit and wait for your character to die from them and respawn. Since the damage doesn't scale to your level, my level 46 HR took about 3 minutes to die. I couldn't move, I couldn't do anything. It was really kind of irritating. I know that as a bad guy, it seems like a win-win, but as a player, it just made me mad. Something to change or avoid in the future?
The caves need more decoration. There were the standard braziers lighting the way, but otherwise the place looked uninhabited in most areas, so it didn't make much sense to have lit braziers.
The flower guy at the end was a really cool and inventive idea. Maybe emphasize that more? It seemed that he was optional, and I think a lot of players might skip right passed him. Maybe make it an objective to interact with the flower? I think this was one of the most interesting parts of the quest, so its a shame its not emphasized more.
The story seemed a bit disjointed sometimes, but I think if you go back over it and adjust it here and there, you'll make it pretty coherent and awesome. Overall, I think this has potential to be really awesome. Especially if you go back and add more about the flower at the end. Then it will really stand out.
Rated and tipped!
If you get a chance to review one of my quests, might I suggest No One Lives Forever: NW-DHIOTYRQ3. Thanks!
Campaign: The Creekside Chronicles NWS-DR2NAKVRN
Part 1: The Lost Children NW-DU2N4I5YN / Part 2 Evil In The Mines: NW-DNHIJFGAT
Part 3: No One Lives Forever NW-DHIOTYRQ3 / Part 4 Home Away From Home: NW-DSBY79LGB
I had a chance to run Following the Grey Society 2 tonight. Fun and enjoyable story, lots to look at and plenty to talk to. Good job! Starred and tipped.
I did notice a few things on my run ...
In Austinard Othello's room - there are a couple of paintings on the walls, but they are about a foot away from the wall, hovering in the air.
In Little One's room - 4 cats on the floor, one is named "Cat 2"
Coming down the stairs to the lower floor, facing the west wall, halfway down - the painting on the wall is hovering in the air about 5 inches off the wall. (this is this way in the return visit to the house as well)
Objective - "Kill or be killed" - after killing the 3 mobs, another encounter is trying to come through the door behind them, only 1 makes it through the closed door, the others are stuck behind the door till I open it.
Objective - "Goto the Nasher Bar in Blacklake" - should that be "Go to the Nasher Bar in Blacklake"
Seemed a little odd to exit that room, and go to the Bar, when I just came in that door from Blacklake, shouldn't I have gone back out to Blacklake?
Anyway to make the final exit out of the house go to overworld? Right now it drops you back in Blacklake after you complete the quest, would be nice to port straight to PE, especially since there is an encounter that spawns right at the door there.
If you get a chance, please run my quest Clan Ravenclaw
[1] Devils in the Sewer
[2] The Summoning
[3] Temple of the Winds
Clan Ravenclaw
Children's Babble
Solstice Academy
LOL I will admit, I hit populate and never went into Austinard's room and check for objects. Oops! Why were you in there?! LOL
For the Hangout to the Bar... I wanted to but you no matter what you pop out at the gate not the door you came in. So the interact text and the explanation from the victim tells you its a secret entrance which isn't represented anywhere on the adventure zone. Should have said press F Travel over to the secret entrance. Best I could do.
Final Exit.... another Doh! I will fix that my avatar appropriately. LOL
Thank you for the run! I will run the Clan Ravenclaw quest this weekend for sure. (probably tomorrow morning)
Stevedestiny1, Thank you! I will take you up as well tomorrow AM.
Clan Ravenclaw is next.
Evil Gnome Night
Behind The Crawler Below
Night of the Cave People
I will play yours tonight!
I need more runs in the Following the Grey Society 2.
I haven't heard any feedback from the we got caught option... hint hint.. There is still a fun ending possible! Thanks guys!
I ran your quest Evil Gnome Night this morning. I will send you a PM.
You should know that I was not able to finish. Once I got to a valley of the gnomes there was no exit.
When talking to the Grey Operative he says "...better be happy once we through." Should be changed to "we're"
When talking to Vernite, there is an option where it says "ell me where he is" Should be "Tell"
The part when you ponder when talking to Suitor it says "allot" it should be changed to "a lot"
I think in some parts, there could be a bit more decoration added, like in those secret passages. They seemed pretty bare. I enjoyed all the interactables, but my inventory got full quite fast, and some items were useless. It may be more realistic, however as the player, I did not know that and I wasn't sure if I needed them later on. I eventually decided to discard some of the quest items. I liked the the text that appeared after some interactables though, so maybe change some of the otherwise useless loots to that instead?
Some NPCs tend to have useless things to say. It felt unnecessary. Perhaps you can remove some or have them say something more important.
I love the work you put into the secret passages, but maybe put something at the end to make it feel more.. Rewarding. Like the NPCs, they felt unnecessary even though you've clearly put work into them. Some clearer music could be added, I could not hear the music you had unless I maximized my volume. Maybe replace some of the music to something more audible. Most maps, there wasn't any music though, so maybe add some sounds here and there as well.
The quest was pretty good overall. Again, good work on the passages, interactables, and the dialogue. The environments were quite good, with a few exceptions. Sound effects used were fitting, and the quest was pretty fun to complete!
Let me start by saying I need to try yours again. It was kicking my <font color="orange">HAMSTER</font>.. too many waves after wave for my POS character. (I can't say its too hard due tot he POS nature of my character) I will PM you what I have thus far. IT is a good quest, slow start then revs up the action.. and the beatdowns... LOL
Thank you! I appreciate the run through. That music has me angry. None of it works right. They have 4 different volume sliders but it seems most are tied to the music slider (some ambient sounds etc) And then, some music is turned up and down via your ambience slider... Ugh!! If I could I would take the game back and get a refund. In fact next time I go up to Palo Alto I will swing by and leave a complaint in person. I will be near there in San Jose tomorrow... I am off track.
I love finding typos, but once done with those I will put in a Warning label that not all NPC's are educated formally on reading writing and sentence structure and may say things that when typed looks incorrect.
Personally, I hear different voices in my head when I see a new face speaking via text even. If everything is the same from NPC to NPC speech wise, the voices sound the same in my head and its the author telling me what was said. So I try to make people, er NPC's talk somewhat differently. I will be reusing that Operative, the Caretaker so I plan to keep them talking in the same manners. The guy that starts every sentence with And really drove people nuts so I nixed that... To think I have to hear him on the radio everyday but people complain in a game...LOL
I had a DM note on the wall as you come into the Osthello's basement that tells you there are plot items here that are not used on other maps. (Sorry I don't like making things ultra obvious, it is meant to be not so noticeable, but yet so close if it were a snake...trying to not break the quest mood with an OOC DM note.) Since you still had items to throw away means you didn't find their intended use. Currently only the sugar has no use since there are no ants in this game and nothing I can make look like a coffee maker.. yet. Soon, soon it will have purpose!
I still love all feedback like this. I see what you were thinking from what you experienced. Very helpful. So I will add a couple questions for you in my PM.
Blutsauger Cathedral (Trading Reviews)
The Mayor of Ash Grove is requesting help from adventurers to investigate recent disappearances', murders, and rumors of vampires. Worst of all, the Mayors own daughter has been kidnapped. Can you help fight against the vile creatures of the night?
[NW-DBCMMYX9M] (Under Review Tab)
If you like gothic horror and vampires...this is the quest for you. Features rich and detailed custom maps, custom costumes/creatures, a decent (but short) story line, scripted boss battle, and scripted NPC's. Also, contains some lore regarding vampires and their kin. Herein this adventure, you will explore the quaint hamlet of Ash Grove, an old cemetery crawling with undead, a crypt infested with bloodsuckers, catacombs where vampires dwell, and a haunted cathedral magically sealed by a wandering mage.