Requesting Reviews: The Wishing Ceremony, NW-DM2ENNIRJ

visualkeiuk · July 2013

I am looking for some feedback on my Solo/Group option Foundry quest, Seven Pieces of Dawn: PT1: The Wishing Ceremony NW-DM2ENNIRJ.

It comes to a point where you can keep editing the dialogue and changing things in the map, day in and out to get it ready for playing where you have to say, let’s just publish it. And get some feedback from others, to better it.

Thank you for your time, happy to reciprocate!

((I would like to get it ready for a video review, and if anyone would like to help with more screenshots that would be great.))

Info and screenshots can be viewed in the Foundry Spotlight page.
http://nw-forum.perfectworld.com/showthread.php?387031-Seven-Pieces-of-Dawn-Pt1-The-Wishing-Ceremony&p=4904611#post4904611

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UPDATES:

v.9 - 4/07
The duration is now short when cleaning.
Changed I can be noticed text from Jasper chat
Changed a spelling mistake from Dawn
Town’s people will spawn when the main objective is complete.
Removed the un-dead from the town, other than the group from the graveyard
To use the rope is now on the objective of the sky ship.
Moved the reach points, the cabin portal
An edit to the dark on the ship
And other small changes from feedback.
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9. A - 4/07
Quick edit to a reach point into the cabin
A few encounter changes.
New attempt to fix the patrols
Clean up on the effects on the end run, to fix low end computers.
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9. B - 4/07
In the attic I removed the web projector, till I can work it out, from the group side.
Added some more decorations to the town
Changed the map locations icons
More edits from feedback.
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9. C - 5/07
Updated some grammatical errors and spelling mistakes.
And other feedback comments
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9. D - 5/07
More grammatical errors and spelling mistakes
Dawn will now say to use the altar nearby, and not this.
The nasher rebels near to Dawn the second time you talk to her will spawn after you complete.
Changed from step into the new gateway to step into the new gateway with Jasper as some did not read that there was no going back as the time guards was being held off, and the main gate had been broken, and they did not seem to see Jasper at the gate they would be taking.
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9. E - 5/07
Jaspers chat has had an update on to defend him as he works on a new gateway.
Thanks everyone for all your feedback. And suggestions
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9. F - 6/07
Renamed invisi-sphere on the altar
Moved the re-spawn point in the group part of the Attic
9. G - 5/07
Changed the exit point of the portal of the group part, when you leave the graveyard
As some people did not understand why the 4 groups behind the gate in the end of the town map, was trying to get into you and to show there was no way for you to go back, and a few people died on the Fend off attacks.
I have reduced the number of encounters outside the door, when you are on that part, so should you die, you are able to fight then to get back in.
Nasher Rebels are now Town's Rebels, I welcome a better suggestive name for them.
A large Re-skinning and custom to the encounter groups
The items in the cabin have been replaced, and moved into better places.
And a few grammatical errors in objectives
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V.10 - 12/07
Changed Description text a bit, and text in items and dialog
Added a better looking door, as people did not like the Drow door
The lights in the Attic is better, also the spell plague is gone as people did not understand it, if they did not do the side quest.
The Horse in the town will not walk around (due to no animation).
Renamed Town's Rebel to just Rebel
Blood water to Bloodied water.
Some effects to the Exit door to the next map of the town
Added a clicker to the base of the ropes of the sky ship, to let you know to climb the ropes
Put smoke effects on the ship, where the invisible walls are.
An invisible wall is now in place, so you can’t get in the cabin till you have updated the reach points.
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10. A - 12/07
A quick update of the lighting in places
Moved the dust a bit around the Altar part, after Wash in the basin, might look into a different dust, tomorrow.
An invisible wall is now between the Ashmadai leader and his guard, as he drains the essence. The invisible wall will go down when you have seen to his guards.
"This was mainly due to some felt fighting the leader and his guards at the same time were too much."
And added No! I needed more time to drain the essence. To the Ashmadai leader when he is disturbed from his essence that would make him stronger.
Added Vines to the side gate, of the town.
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10. B - 13/07
Moved the spawn spot in the attic, away from the exit door as people was exiting not knowing.
Added some deco to the main door of the Quest, just to hide the full black, it looked out of place.
Changed Japers animations, mainly him holding books, as it did not look right with the main animations
Moved some of the patrol points around
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10. C - 13/07
Moved some of the Encounters
A fix on the Ashmadai Leaders, with the invisible walls
Changed the dust animation altogether on the altar part.
Removed some effects, not needed
Added an animation when you turn on the standing torch
A new effect to the warding in the cabin
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10. D - 13/07
Some invisible walls edit.
And some text changes
Renamed some items, I forgot to rename when I updated them.
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10. E - 27/07
Made a start of adding music, to the maps
Fixed Jasper Phelan disappearing on the group part
Edited some dialogs.
The encounters on the objective Board the sky ship, have been moved back.
Changed the encounters around on the Sky-ship
Moved the reach points on the sky-ship, so people have to kill the encounters to progress the objective
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sphecida · July 2013

I'll try it! You're right about editing - I could just keep fiddling with my quest forever. But people in the Foundry forum are wonderful about constructive feedback and are sure to give good advice.

visualkeiuk · July 2013

Thank you, mate. This is the sort of thing I need. Thank you.

My other is ready and out. but the dialogue is nowhere near ready like this one is..

sarkany69 · July 2013

A nicely done quest overall, though I noticed a few things that could use improving.

-I only noticed 1 spelling mistake near the beginning, when talking about the hidden pieces: I can be noticed -> It can be noticed
-There are several times when you transition to a new area that you drop down to the new area from above. Maybe alter the Y height so that doesn't happen.
-When I had the quest board the ship, it wasn't very obvious how exactly I was supposed to get on the ship (I ended up walking across the rope). Perhaps you could inform the player, either with dialogue or changing the quest text.
-When I entered the cabin, I got stuck in the wall near the ceiling. I got out by using the door to go out again and back in.

Otherwise the combat was good for 1 player, and the story was well thought out.

If you wouldn't mind reviewing my quest in return I'd greatly appreciate it. It's my first foundry and is not quite finished. It's meant for a group of 2 or 1 highly skilled player. NW-DIG3FBD2Q

visualkeiuk · July 2013

I will get on to your quest,. asap.

I did think that about the rope. but i felt it might be good to keep it as it was. but i will have a rethink on it.

the stuck in the cabin wall. i cant seem to fix that, but i found you can always click the door to get back out. I hope they better fix the portals. but i might have to move it a bit.

and the I can be noticed was right. if it the place i am thinking of.

"she hid the seven pieces of the dial that belongs to the gateway. I can still use it, but it's not as secure. I can be noticed."

meaning he would be noticed using the gateway.

The drop down from above, was due to I don't want people going back, that is mainly the Group part nothing I can do for the solo people.

sarkany69 · July 2013

visualkeiuk wrote: »

"she hid the seven pieces of the dial that belongs to the gateway. I can still use it, but it's not as secure. I can be noticed."

meaning he would be noticed using the gateway.

Yeah I guess I misread that part, I thought he was referring to the items, not himself.

visualkeiuk · July 2013

sarkany69 wrote: »

Yeah I guess I misread that part, I thought he was referring to the items, not himself.

I have noted it. maybe i could change it some-way.

casekuk · July 2013

I too enjoyed your quest and agree with the critisism here, especially the boat and how to get onto it.. I too used the rope.

There could be a potential problem with the cabin, as I got stuck in the door a couple of times, but was ok the third time I entered.

Good work overall

I'd like a trade of review if you have time, it would be appreciated. My quest can be found here:NW-DIKGSOTWT

I apologise in advance for the foundry bug that makes the **** quests disappear.. I wasn't aware of this when I made the quest (my first and only) and don't have a clue how to 'change' it now. You will almost certainly have to log out and back in twice to get the quest to re-appear

All the best,

Art.

visualkeiuk · July 2013

@casekuk I will do your quest tomorrow. as its time to log.

the get onto the sky ship the use of the rope is the only way onto it, i didn't want to put in the quest objective, as there is only one way onto it.

so maybe i could change it from "Board the sky ship as Jasper keeps all the creatures at bay." to
"Board the sky ship, along the ropes as Jasper keeps all the creatures at bay." would that be better!!

the cabin portal is something i was looking at before i published it. but i felt well people don't get stuck as such. as they can click to exit out and back in. it seems to be when you enter it from one of the other sides, and not head on. but i will look into this tomorrow. (maybe i could move the portal inside the cabin more in.)

if you enjoyed that try out my other called Sacred Heart, the dialogue is done.just not on its final edit. NW-DECMTQMEA

and sarkany69 quest I would like to do. but with it being a group quest, i find it hard as i don't get to group with people.

sarkany69 · July 2013

and sarkany69 quest I would like to do. but with it being a group quest, i find it hard as i don't get to group with people.

No worries, I was just hoping for some more feedback. I realize most foundries are aimed towards solo players since not everyone can get a group together, that was the basis of my trying to make it for 2 people and not more. I was considering making a solo version of this map, everything the same just fewer mobs.

Oh and I'll definitely check out your other quest tomorrow.

visualkeiuk · July 2013

An update has been put out; see my main page for info, A few things I wanted to touch on.

When you talk to Dawn the second time, and the encounters behind who are lighting up the towns people things, I placed them there so you would get attacked before talking to her.
The sparkles on the ceilings in the first room of the quest, in the town and in the cabin, are teleports.
But the main one in the first room of the quest is to get back when or if you die on the group part, some forget that this quest has a group option, so I have to cater for that.

The Drow door in the first room will make sense when you read what Jasper has to say, as one review didn’t understand why it was there and felt it was out of place. (A note to the other person who picked up on this. if you look in isn’t half there; there is a locked trap door.)

I enjoyed how the towns people worked, but again some didn’t like this, that they was just wandering around with not a thank you for your hard work and running though groups, I have made them spawn when the objective is complete, then when each group of the five is killed, but doing this I’m not sure people will get to see them, I will add speech to the asap.

I edited the darkness when you go on the sky ship, to go dark after you read the log book, I wanted the room to be dark so people would light the torch, as but no matter what I did, if people was not in the cabin when it went dark they had a problem seeing where they was going. So I have kept what I wanted to do, to a degree.

I will have to say I did not test this on anything lower then level 15 and up, on all classes. So the low level person who went in I’m not sure what your problem was, but I will go in lower to check it out.

And the lag in the last part of the map I will address this issue at a later time, as I have no problem with it, I didn’t even notice.

Then there is the skeletons, there is one group in the graveyard, and two around the old soil. That might account for the next remark about Overlapping encounters. The two groups have not gone, it was to put a feel into the town, but I kept the group in the graveyard.

And last I noticed from one person Overlapping encounters; this is not true, in Solo or Group. If you should have agro from a group and walk into another spawn that is not my fault, but this has been addressed in this last update.
(Note on the quest before you accept it; it has always said there are hidden encounters.)

There are three easy group by the side of the boat as you go up the ropes. that may be there should you not get them before, but two of them are for if you fall going up the rope. and the other is to get before hand. as Jasper says.

visualkeiuk · July 2013

Sorry for the double post. I didn't want to take from my main, post. I can merge this to the other, if its a problem.

To @sarkany69 I gave you a short review in a P-message, but its hard to do it on my own, as I asked for hours if anyone on Dragon wanted to do your quest with me, But I went on my own to try as much as I could.

I felt it was nice polished, and the story was great. I found that the stacked encounters to much, but then it is like i said for more then one, so that could be the case. some of the traps I had to do /killme as they was not killing me just held me in place, I don't like to many map transitions when or if you can build 3 or 4 places in one blank map. unless its a pre-baked map.

but in all it was good i got up to the end in the sewers, but i had to leave when i was out of pots. I will star you when i get someone to join me to do it.

--==--

A mysterious Portal - @casekuk

It gas great potential, but it needs a lot of work done to it.
I didn't think it was ready to be published, but Its nice to get peoples point to work on.
as that is what its mainly about.

A few things I picked up on.

The banner was random to have as an exit.
Barracks1 might need to be renamed.

When you leave Barracks1, you might want to use the unusable door, as it opens. To nothing

You could use an invisible clicker on the large items like the Crystals in the Tunnels.

And the first Crystal has the default name "cave crystals 01"

An interaction when you get it would be good. And the second says "cave crystal".

the story is solid, and so much dialogue that was very in depth.

cant wait to try this again. at a later time.

casekuk · July 2013

Thanks muchly for the feedback.. Greatly appreciated.

The funny thing about your critisisms is that most of those things I don't know how to change... The silly typo's and things like that I can easily do of course but for example:

The banner being the exit.. I totally agree that this is random, but have no clue what to use.. I searched for hours to try and find something that didnt look out of place, and would actually 'click' lol.. Any suggestions?

I dont follow about the door? I also struggle with what to 'actually' use.. It seems there are no simple 'doors' lol.

Whats an invisible clicker? :P

Thanks muchly for the help, and review.. I like the foundry community, so many decent folks here. If only the main forums were the same!

All the best,

Art

redneckronin · July 2013

casekuk wrote: »

Thanks muchly for the feedback.. Greatly appreciated.

The funny thing about your critisisms is that most of those things I don't know how to change... The silly typo's and things like that I can easily do of course but for example:

The banner being the exit.. I totally agree that this is random, but have no clue what to use.. I searched for hours to try and find something that didnt look out of place, and would actually 'click' lol.. Any suggestions?

I dont follow about the door? I also struggle with what to 'actually' use.. It seems there are no simple 'doors' lol.

Whats an invisible clicker? :P

Thanks muchly for the help, and review.. I like the foundry community, so many decent folks here. If only the main forums were the same!

All the best,

Art

Casek, if you haven't already done so, I'd suggest starting your own review/feedback thread.

Then we can help with any of the things you don't know how to change.

An "invisible clicker" is an otherwise invisible object that you can interact with to get the "sparkly interaction" thing happening. You can place it just in front, or over an object and it makes it look like the object is interactable.

Its great for using small interaction areas on larger objects for example - like having a small area of a large wall interactable.

As for doors you can use "door" from the "Special" tab, if there's nothing behind it to connect to it becomes a "fake door", but you can then put an "invisible clicker" to make it interactable and use it to trigger something, or use "invisible plane" or "invisible sphere" from the teleporters tab to make it a door that teleports to another map section for example.

All The Best

visualkeiuk · July 2013

@casekuk

With the first Crystal or any of the two, click on them in edit mode and a box will open there you can change the name, to anything you want, as a lot of people will pick up on using the default names on things.

with the invisible clicker if you type in invis you will see invisible clickers you can put that in fount of the say crystal to save having to click such a huge thing, that lags people out.

when you use the door the fist time in the Barracks you used the active door, and not an unusable one, if you type door in the search box you will find the same one but one that will say unusable. as when you click it that opens up the main map the doors open.

with Barracks1 go on the map and on the top left it will say rename.

with the banner why not add a horse or a cart, and put a invisible click there.

I'am not a big fan of lots of map transitions, but they way you have done it made it OK. as it went with the story.

many will get put off by many of the things, but if they forget all that and look at the time and effect you put into the dialogue.

as I said there is a lot of potential, you just need to get your head in the foundry.

feel free to PM me, should you wish more help. but most of all don't be afraid to ask questions,

http://nw-forum.perfectworld.com/showthread.php?152801-Neverwinter-Foundry-Chat

If you have not yet, join this channel. they also have a voice server where they offer help.

and yes like redneckronin just said, you could start your own post, to get feedback. as remember this is for mine. lol its all good.

sphecida · July 2013

Hey, just a quick note: I started the quest and had fun with the first part, but when I went through the door, I clicked on the wagon, got sent back to PE, and the quest dropped from my journal (I think I heard there was a bug like this going around). So I'm going to pick it back up again. You might just want to change the text on the wagon so people don't make the same mistake I did.

Also, this projector looks a little odd:

casekuk · July 2013

Thanks so much for your time and effort in helping me Visual, I have taken your advice and changed all the things that need changing. I'm glad you think it has potential, I enjoyed making it, and have a lot of story left to tell.

I will run Sacred Heart when I get some more spare time, and review that for you too.

My hat off to you good sir!

All the best,

Art.

PS : Redneckronin.. I will start that thread right now

visualkeiuk · July 2013

with the wagon I can't see to change that. but I would think the quest objective would be a clue. Explore the town. but I will look into this now.

and the projector, that is strange, that is from the group stage, and should only show when they open the mothers egg. I will fix this now.

thanks, for the feedback.

sphecida · July 2013

Unfortunately, I can't accept the quest again because the game thinks I already have it, though it doesn't show in my journal. So I can't get back to that spot. Maybe it will fix itself with the next patch.

I didn't even have time to look around that area because I clicked on the wagon too soon - I'm guessing that's an abort interaction?

visualkeiuk · July 2013

Yes that is a game bug you will need to relog in and out the game and it wil be back if not then you should be able to pick it up again. And yes like it says near the top of the quest page of my quest that the doors and wagon exit the map back into PE and aborts it.

The web projector is fixed now good luck on the grou part I know I would not solo it but then I'm not a big player I'm spend it reviewing or building.

So it will be good to get feedback from the hard mode.

I'm away till next week but will pop online when I can

Again thanks for your time and all.

Ps sorry for the spelling

visigoth18 · July 2013

Hey my "Video Review" of your quest is Uploading now

visualkeiuk · July 2013

visigoth18 wrote: »

Hey my "Video Review" of your quest is Uploading now

Can't wait,. thanks again.
I will have to link it on my sig and main quest page.

Requesting Reviews: The Wishing Ceremony, NW-DM2ENNIRJ

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