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Puns and Dad Jokes

catstarstocatstarsto Posts: 1,129 Arc User
edited March 2021 in Off Topic
Post your best and worst puns and dad jokes:

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Courage is doing what is right even when it isn't popular or safe. Honor is retaining the dignity and virtue in one's self, so it can light the way for others in the darkest of times. Compassion is showing patience and mercy towards others, even when it isn't returned or deserved. A hero is defined by these 3 words, they set him apart from others as a beacon of hope and excellence.
Post edited by catstarsto on

Comments

  • catstarstocatstarsto Posts: 1,129 Arc User
    edited March 2021
    A man walks into a bar, and says.... "Ow!"

    Do you guys want to hear the story of the broken pencil?
    Nevermind, it is pointless...

    What do you call it when you have watches around your stomach?
    a waist of time

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    Post edited by catstarsto on

    Courage is doing what is right even when it isn't popular or safe. Honor is retaining the dignity and virtue in one's self, so it can light the way for others in the darkest of times. Compassion is showing patience and mercy towards others, even when it isn't returned or deserved. A hero is defined by these 3 words, they set him apart from others as a beacon of hope and excellence.
  • catstarstocatstarsto Posts: 1,129 Arc User
    edited March 2021
    Today I ordered 2000lbs of Chinese food...
    It was Won Ton

    Dad: curses "pardon my French"
    Kid goes to school
    Teacher: "Does anyone know any foreign languages?

    I am terrified of elevators.
    I have started taking steps to avoid them.

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    Post edited by catstarsto on

    Courage is doing what is right even when it isn't popular or safe. Honor is retaining the dignity and virtue in one's self, so it can light the way for others in the darkest of times. Compassion is showing patience and mercy towards others, even when it isn't returned or deserved. A hero is defined by these 3 words, they set him apart from others as a beacon of hope and excellence.
  • catstarstocatstarsto Posts: 1,129 Arc User
    edited March 2021
    My pet mouse called Elvis died. he was caught in a trap

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    Post edited by catstarsto on

    Courage is doing what is right even when it isn't popular or safe. Honor is retaining the dignity and virtue in one's self, so it can light the way for others in the darkest of times. Compassion is showing patience and mercy towards others, even when it isn't returned or deserved. A hero is defined by these 3 words, they set him apart from others as a beacon of hope and excellence.
  • catstarstocatstarsto Posts: 1,129 Arc User
    edited March 2021
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    Post edited by catstarsto on

    Courage is doing what is right even when it isn't popular or safe. Honor is retaining the dignity and virtue in one's self, so it can light the way for others in the darkest of times. Compassion is showing patience and mercy towards others, even when it isn't returned or deserved. A hero is defined by these 3 words, they set him apart from others as a beacon of hope and excellence.
  • catstarstocatstarsto Posts: 1,129 Arc User
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    Courage is doing what is right even when it isn't popular or safe. Honor is retaining the dignity and virtue in one's self, so it can light the way for others in the darkest of times. Compassion is showing patience and mercy towards others, even when it isn't returned or deserved. A hero is defined by these 3 words, they set him apart from others as a beacon of hope and excellence.
  • catstarstocatstarsto Posts: 1,129 Arc User

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    Courage is doing what is right even when it isn't popular or safe. Honor is retaining the dignity and virtue in one's self, so it can light the way for others in the darkest of times. Compassion is showing patience and mercy towards others, even when it isn't returned or deserved. A hero is defined by these 3 words, they set him apart from others as a beacon of hope and excellence.
  • catstarstocatstarsto Posts: 1,129 Arc User
    edited March 2021
    When you are literally getting dogged to leave
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    Courage is doing what is right even when it isn't popular or safe. Honor is retaining the dignity and virtue in one's self, so it can light the way for others in the darkest of times. Compassion is showing patience and mercy towards others, even when it isn't returned or deserved. A hero is defined by these 3 words, they set him apart from others as a beacon of hope and excellence.
  • catstarstocatstarsto Posts: 1,129 Arc User
    edited March 2021
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    Courage is doing what is right even when it isn't popular or safe. Honor is retaining the dignity and virtue in one's self, so it can light the way for others in the darkest of times. Compassion is showing patience and mercy towards others, even when it isn't returned or deserved. A hero is defined by these 3 words, they set him apart from others as a beacon of hope and excellence.
  • catstarstocatstarsto Posts: 1,129 Arc User
    edited March 2021
    When you see a bunch of geese flying in their v-formation, ever wonder why one sides longer than the other?
    (Because there’s more geese on that side) ^^

    Where do toy stores keep their Arnold Schwarzenegger action figures?
    ( In Aisle B, back)

    What do you call a cow with no legs?
    (Ground beef)

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    A rail gun
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    Tony Starch
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    Darth Tater
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    The Mangolorian
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    Post edited by catstarsto on

    Courage is doing what is right even when it isn't popular or safe. Honor is retaining the dignity and virtue in one's self, so it can light the way for others in the darkest of times. Compassion is showing patience and mercy towards others, even when it isn't returned or deserved. A hero is defined by these 3 words, they set him apart from others as a beacon of hope and excellence.
  • catstarstocatstarsto Posts: 1,129 Arc User
    edited March 2021
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    Dad jokes can be addicting, but I can quip any time.
    Post edited by catstarsto on

    Courage is doing what is right even when it isn't popular or safe. Honor is retaining the dignity and virtue in one's self, so it can light the way for others in the darkest of times. Compassion is showing patience and mercy towards others, even when it isn't returned or deserved. A hero is defined by these 3 words, they set him apart from others as a beacon of hope and excellence.
  • spinnytopspinnytop Posts: 16,450 Arc User
    Why is there only one person posting in this thread?

    Okay all the gifs loading and repeatedly making the page jump was kind of annoying...

    Okay so here is my dad pun:

    How many workers does it take to change a lightbulb?

    None, the manager has to do it because he refuse to pay a working wage.

    I had a better dad joke prepared but I forgot what it was because the page took so long to load, sorry! my ISP sucks ^_^;
  • subjustsubjust Posts: 48 Arc User
    When does a joke become a dad joke?

    When it becomes apparent :O
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