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Literary Challenge #54 Discussion Thread

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  • cmdrscarletcmdrscarlet Member Posts: 5,137 Arc User
    edited November 2013
    I'd say the latter: part 2 precedes this entry thus goes to LC 53.

    In my humble opinion.
  • marcusdkanemarcusdkane Member Posts: 7,439 Arc User
    edited November 2013
    aten66 wrote: »
    Posted my entry Nightmare of Air and Darkness.

    It's set a few days after the 'Sphere of Influence'.

    As to the mention of anachronism's, it's more of a mention to the fact that only one character can be considered to have all these events occur around them, while alternate characters could be considered alternate timelines/ have similar series of events occur to them.

    So iin this I play the fact that Gregs had all this happen to him, while the others where given small roles to play, but vital to me. Ex: Ace planting bombs since he is Romulan, and Berg going with Koren,a fellow klingon captain.

    Hope it makes sense!
    I liked it :cool: I guess you found the same thing I did, that the scenario itself was a bit 'dictating' in which way the events played out, but your guys at least went through the gate :cool:
  • marcusdkanemarcusdkane Member Posts: 7,439 Arc User
    edited November 2013
    So... Slight Problem. My story that i'm working on, is a direct part two to the last entry, but it would be a pecursor to this entry. Should i place it in this challenge, then do a second (more appropriate) entry, or should i post it in the last thread and leave this challenge for the more accurate themed entry?

    I'd post it to the other thread, as they're not locked, and then the second one in this thread... Looking forward to what you've come up with :cool:
  • allen1973allen1973 Member Posts: 22 Arc User
    edited November 2013
    bluegeek
    Community Moderator
    #8

    "And yes, I say "so far". The efficiency of the Romulan commanders is pathetic. They have no experience with an invasion force of this size and their leadership is disorganized. The priority should be to neutralize the Voth at all costs. But no, they send our forces on arbitrary assignments to dissipate ion storms, repair plasma leaks, transport supplies, and investigate anomalous waveforms -- often resulting in an ambush by the Voth, who have their own cloaking technology.

    I sense a Federation hand in this foolish preoccupation with scientific discovery, logistics, and maintenance work. Then again, the Romulans have always been too curious for their own good and the Republic is as unimaginably idealistic as the Federation sometimes. In this case however, speaking as a science officer the best strategy might be to invade now, research later."

    Hey Bluegeek, I agree, I noticed a misspelling in one of the original duty officer assignments. I think they should keep the ones they have, its kind of exiting, I also think a practical solution would be to create additional consignments. What I liked about this passage, and that similar, even from other authors is that it really sounds like a complaining Klingon General who is frustrated with a diabolical enemy, insufficient allies and diplomatic protocol.
    It is sometimes difficult for me to retain a sense of objectivity when it comes to critiquing science fiction. I do notice that I'm not the only one who would benefit from a creative writing course at the junior college. I do however benefit from having taken such a course, and I think that at least this is good practice for most of us.
    Positive reinforcement is the key here, and it is weird how many gossip entries there are verses the number of literary critiques. Or for that matter how the thread instantly outnumbers the actual literary entries, I guess being new to this I haven't had the chance to comment on it. Just sayin'.
    I understand people can use the thread for any purpose, I do think casting suggestions is somewhat interesting, if premature, although I find myself brainstorming often enough as it is, so I would choose to support the creative side of the thread at least.
  • marcusdkanemarcusdkane Member Posts: 7,439 Arc User
    edited November 2013
    allen1973 wrote: »
    it is weird how many gossip entries there are verses the number of literary critiques. Or for that matter how the thread instantly outnumbers the actual literary entries, I guess being new to this I haven't had the chance to comment on it. Just sayin'.
    Welcome :) That is often the way with the Literary Challenges...

    allen1973 wrote: »
    I understand people can use the thread for any purpose, I do think casting suggestions is somewhat interesting, if premature, although I find myself brainstorming often enough as it is, so I would choose to support the creative side of the thread at least.
    Something I do when writing, is to visualise what I wish to write as if watching a movie. By 'casting' my characters, I find it gives me better insight into their behaviour and mannerisms :)

    With regards your entry, it was very enjoyable and well written, although for most written entries, such as these LCs and fanfics, authors will use additional spacing to make the text easier on the eye, and break 'the wall of text' :) Certainly an interesting premise that the Iconians created the Borg :cool:
  • maelstromvortexmaelstromvortex Member Posts: 130 Arc User
    edited November 2013
    http://sto-forum.perfectworld.com/showpost.php?p=13718721&postcount=3

    Don't have many posts on this forum yet.. but I do like to write, how'd I do?
  • marcusdkanemarcusdkane Member Posts: 7,439 Arc User
    edited November 2013
    http://sto-forum.perfectworld.com/showpost.php?p=13718721&postcount=3

    Don't have many posts on this forum yet.. but I do like to write, how'd I do?

    I liked it :cool: I liked the idea of a gate within a star, I liked the ship ending up in absolute nothingness, and I liked the mystery of the second barely detected gate. Another commander may have set course rather than immediately heading home (but I think that was the wise choice), and I especially enjoyed the protocol fade to black :D I'll look forward to learning more about this crew in future challenges :cool:
  • wraithshadow13wraithshadow13 Member Posts: 1,728 Arc User
    edited November 2013
    http://sto-forum.perfectworld.com/showpost.php?p=13766951&postcount=39


    So this was what i was working on in anticipation of this challenge before being terribly terribly wrong. Either way, that's the original entry that would have been Challenge 54, but i will now get to work on an entry that was more suited to the specific detail of this challenge.
  • marcusdkanemarcusdkane Member Posts: 7,439 Arc User
    edited November 2013
    http://sto-forum.perfectworld.com/showpost.php?p=13766951&postcount=39


    So this was what i was working on in anticipation of this challenge before being terribly terribly wrong. Either way, that's the original entry that would have been Challenge 54, but i will now get to work on an entry that was more suited to the specific detail of this challenge.

    I loved it :D Especially how Krotius stuck Worf at the end :D He truly is chaos incarnate :cool: Really nice use of the material and integration of your characters into the events :cool:
  • maelstromvortexmaelstromvortex Member Posts: 130 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    I liked it :cool: I liked the idea of a gate within a star, I liked the ship ending up in absolute nothingness, and I liked the mystery of the second barely detected gate. Another commander may have set course rather than immediately heading home (but I think that was the wise choice), and I especially enjoyed the protocol fade to black :D I'll look forward to learning more about this crew in future challenges :cool:

    Thanks for the feedback. Yeah, another captain may have gone to look at the other gate, but with the gate only being powered for a maximum of two hours and its containment field threatening to fail, probably a good thing they returned.
  • jonsillsjonsills Member Posts: 10,354 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    "This is just perfect. We have a genetically engineered super soldier, who is only six years old by the way, who just punched out a dinosaur..."

    Yes. Yes, this is indeed just perfect. :)

    (Sadly, I'll be sitting this round out - my FPS goes to Gre'thor whenever I go to the Sphere, so I have little idea what actually happens over there.)
    Lorna-Wing-sig.png
  • wraithshadow13wraithshadow13 Member Posts: 1,728 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    jonsills wrote: »
    Yes. Yes, this is indeed just perfect. :)

    (Sadly, I'll be sitting this round out - my FPS goes to Gre'thor whenever I go to the Sphere, so I have little idea what actually happens over there.)

    HA! you beat me to posting about my story while i was fixing the Question marks. It's a shame you're sitting this one out. I'd Definitely be curious to see the Gorn point of view on the Voth and their Raptors.


    Either way, my story is up, and personally it seemed more like a filler episode. I'm glad it's getting a good response so far though.
  • marcusdkanemarcusdkane Member Posts: 7,439 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    Thanks for the feedback. Yeah, another captain may have gone to look at the other gate, but with the gate only being powered for a maximum of two hours and its containment field threatening to fail, probably a good thing they returned.

    Anytime, it's always nice to see new writers contributing to the challenges :cool:
  • drajoradrajora Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    And Selene returns for another story - sort of. I really need to get back to Captain Bh'ypiv and his arrested Chief Engineer at some stage.

    Anyway, the idea for this one was drawn out of the VOY episode where they went after the Omega particle. With the positive abundance of Omega in Solanae and the crowds of liberated borg running around the STO universe, that left me with a nice little story concept.

    Enjoy.
  • marcusdkanemarcusdkane Member Posts: 7,439 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    drajora wrote: »
    And Selene returns for another story - sort of. I really need to get back to Captain Bh'ypiv and his arrested Chief Engineer at some stage.

    Anyway, the idea for this one was drawn out of the VOY episode where they went after the Omega particle. With the positive abundance of Omega in Solanae and the crowds of liberated borg running around the STO universe, that left me with a nice little story concept.

    Enjoy.

    Very nice concept, I really enjoyed this entry :cool:
  • hfmuddhfmudd Member Posts: 881 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    Very nice concept, I really enjoyed this entry :cool:

    Same here - the loop, the descriptions of the sphere, the 'rescue mission' and the mystery / cliffhanger at the end.
    Join Date: January 2011
  • cmdrscarletcmdrscarlet Member Posts: 5,137 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    Finally!

    Ok, so I obliquely answered the challenge. So far though, my gaming experience has been more pew-pew than explore-explore. That's fine in an MMO, but in a setting where "exploration" is the raison d'etre, I went that route.

    I do not anticipate following up with this so it's up to the reader if Kathryn and the crew of the Solaris succeeded or not. ;) BUT the next LC will actually govern that.

    Cast:
    Kathryn Beringer - Rachel Nichols

    Thel Ythysi - Kevin Sorbo

    Omazei - Gemma Arterton (cast change)

    Mentioned but not seen:
    Anthi Ythysi - Katheryn Winnick
    Helmsman - Random extra #1
  • marcusdkanemarcusdkane Member Posts: 7,439 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    Finally!

    Ok, so I obliquely answered the challenge. So far though, my gaming experience has been more pew-pew than explore-explore. That's fine in an MMO, but in a setting where "exploration" is the raison d'etre, I went that route.

    I do not anticipate following up with this so it's up to the reader if Kathryn and the crew of the Solaris succeeded or not. ;) BUT the next LC will actually govern that.

    Cast:
    Kathryn Beringer - Rachel Nichols

    Thel Ythysi - Kevin Sorbo

    Omazei - Gemma Arterton (cast change)

    Mentioned but not seen:
    Anthi Ythysi - Katheryn Winnick
    Helmsman - Random extra #1

    Excellent entry. Have either of those other ships been mentioned in your previous entries? I was just trying to think if one was the ship of Kathryn's Deltan friend :cool:
  • cmdrscarletcmdrscarlet Member Posts: 5,137 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    Thank you for reading!

    The Deltan friend (Daikar) is on the Corborba :P These are ships are meant for this story for now. However, if an LC (past or present) allows it, then the Misericorde will make an appearance (pun intended?).

    Right now, they are the motivation for Kathyrn's current desire to explore the Sphere, instead of fighting on it (like the game would have the player do). If the ships appear elsewhere, then that may be the extra motivation for Kathryn here.

    You know, several LCs ago, I stated that my entries do not follow a linear path. I still think this is a decent decision as it allows me flexibility to drop my characters whenever and wherever I need them to satisfy the LC itself. So, if the Misericorde was known the Kathryn previously, then her motivation is overtly missing from this piece. But if this is how she knows the ship, then this event may motivate her actions later. That creative option is appealing to me. I just hope its not a turn-off to the audience.
  • marcusdkanemarcusdkane Member Posts: 7,439 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    Thank you for reading!

    The Deltan friend (Daikar) is on the Corborba :P These are ships are meant for this story for now. However, if an LC (past or present) allows it, then the Misericorde will make an appearance (pun intended?).

    Right now, they are the motivation for Kathyrn's current desire to explore the Sphere, instead of fighting on it (like the game would have the player do). If the ships appear elsewhere, then that may be the extra motivation for Kathryn here.

    You know, several LCs ago, I stated that my entries do not follow a linear path. I still think this is a decent decision as it allows me flexibility to drop my characters whenever and wherever I need them to satisfy the LC itself. So, if the Misericorde was known the Kathryn previously, then her motivation is overtly missing from this piece. But if this is how she knows the ship, then this event may motivate her actions later. That creative option is appealing to me. I just hope its not a turn-off to the audience.
    Ahh, that's right... I couldn't remember the spelling of his name, but I'm glad I was thinking of the right name :D I have to admit, I do follow a fairly linear path with my entries, but I do agree with you that there is a definite flexibility of writing out of sequence, and I think some of my favourite pieces, Selek and Marcus against the Borg, the Klingon murder of the Pentaxian Emporer, and Marcus' arrest for his sister's death, have come about when not writing in a linear way... I think it works quite nicely to keep everything fresh :cool: Equally, I hope you've enjoyed the series of mini entries I've been working on ^_^
  • ironphoenix113ironphoenix113 Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    Finally got mine posted. Sorry it was a bit late, I've had a lot going on recently. At any rate, special shoutout to @marcusdkane for doing Ael's dialog in her conversation with Bryan. Let me know what you all think!
    Vice Admiral Bryan Mitchel Valot
    Commanding officer: Odyssey class U.S.S. Athena
    Admiral of the 1st Assault Fleet
    Join date: Some time in Closed Beta
  • marcusdkanemarcusdkane Member Posts: 7,439 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    Finally got mine posted. Sorry it was a bit late, I've had a lot going on recently. At any rate, special shoutout to @marcusdkane for doing Ael's dialog in her conversation with Bryan. Let me know what you all think!

    That worked out really nicely, I hope a future LC will give us the opportunity to collaborate again :cool:
  • ironphoenix113ironphoenix113 Member Posts: 0 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    That worked out really nicely, I hope a future LC will give us the opportunity to collaborate again :cool:

    I imagine it probably will :cool: I certainly look forward to working together again :D
    Vice Admiral Bryan Mitchel Valot
    Commanding officer: Odyssey class U.S.S. Athena
    Admiral of the 1st Assault Fleet
    Join date: Some time in Closed Beta
  • danquellerdanqueller Member Posts: 501 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    Ok..got an entry out for this LC.


    Real Life got in the way of this LC the past two weeks, and I wasn't sure I'd be able to get anything out. With luck, things will be back to normal now and I can do a better job next LC.
  • jonsillsjonsills Member Posts: 10,354 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    I really do kind of wish I could participate in this LC, because based on the descriptions I've seen in here I can just imagine Grunt's reaction to the Sphere (where, if he were the first Ferengi there, he'd have patents all through Alliance space on anything coming from there), and to seeing a V. rex ("I don't know what we just found, Subcommander. It looks like a Gorn with a glandular disorder and severe emotional issues. Oh, and lasers on its frixing head.").

    Unfortunately, if I don't see it I can't write about it well at all, and my video card just won't render the place in anything but stop-motion unless I'm looking straight up. I can't fly a starship through tight confines under those conditions. I can't even figure out how you're supposed to gather energy from the Ion Stream!
    Lorna-Wing-sig.png
  • danquellerdanqueller Member Posts: 501 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    jonsills wrote: »
    I really do kind of wish I could participate in this LC, because based on the descriptions I've seen in here I can just imagine Grunt's reaction to the Sphere (where, if he were the first Ferengi there, he'd have patents all through Alliance space on anything coming from there), and to seeing a V. rex ("I don't know what we just found, Subcommander. It looks like a Gorn with a glandular disorder and severe emotional issues. Oh, and lasers on its frixing head.").

    Unfortunately, if I don't see it I can't write about it well at all, and my video card just won't render the place in anything but stop-motion unless I'm looking straight up. I can't fly a starship through tight confines under those conditions. I can't even figure out how you're supposed to gather energy from the Ion Stream!

    Yeah, it taxes the video card pretty heavily, though ground combat locations -might- not have the same issues. Even top-notch cards have trouble with it (even computers have trouble comprehending a Dyson Sphere it seems). As far as the Ion Stream, best thing I can say is that I think there are two missions...one you have to fly close to one of the rings, and the other you have to go to one of the towers firing a beam at the stream from -below- the stream. Have to look for the indicators on the map and try high and low areas in that location.

    Sorry to hear you have trouble with it. Does it happen on the instanced maps too (PVE Queued missions such as 'Storming the Spire')?
  • cmdrscarletcmdrscarlet Member Posts: 5,137 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    @ Jonsills - unlike scanning anomalies where you need to be within 5km to play the mini-game, the Dyson stuff is at the 3km mark, meaning you have to get REAL close to "see" the goal. With everything being on a HUGE setting you might be flying around a lot ... assuming your card worked in there.

    To be honest, I have spent probably an hour in the Sphere and have yet to put boot to ground. So my entry was a way a skirt my lack of experience in the zone. You can do it! :)
  • marcusdkanemarcusdkane Member Posts: 7,439 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    danqueller wrote: »
    Ok..got an entry out for this LC.


    Real Life got in the way of this LC the past two weeks, and I wasn't sure I'd be able to get anything out. With luck, things will be back to normal now and I can do a better job next LC.
    I really enjoyed that :cool: Not long now till the next LC :cool:
  • zidanetribalzidanetribal Member Posts: 220 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    danqueller wrote: »
    Ok..got an entry out for this LC.


    Real Life got in the way of this LC the past two weeks, and I wasn't sure I'd be able to get anything out. With luck, things will be back to normal now and I can do a better job next LC.

    I can sympathize with this statement.

    I had to rush this LC, because I have two final papers to do for my classes. This time, Admiral Lee must face a dilemma as a result of a past action of his.
  • marcusdkanemarcusdkane Member Posts: 7,439 Arc User
    edited December 2013
    I can sympathize with this statement.

    I had to rush this LC, because I have two final papers to do for my classes. This time, Admiral Lee must face a dilemma as a result of a past action of his.

    My favourite Admiral Lee story yet, very nicely done :cool:
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